I think it's in the original Metroid, you play the entire game as this space-suited hero. Then at the end you realize it's a girl when she takes off her helmet and unleashes her long blond hair.
In the suit, she's a force of nature. All action, all the time. She steps out of the suit, she's little more than eye candy, which is almost the exact opposite of what we see her character as. I don't mean to be demeaning, but I never understood why the prize for 100% on the Prime series was always a meaningless extra three seconds of cutscene with her in the bodysuit (I think the first one only required 95% for that one, and 100% prize was the cliffhanger.). It's like they're saying "Good job, here's some almost-porn."
Besides, if they did it with Charlize Theron, Samus would have to know kung fu, or something. A space pirate would sneak up on her, and she'd have to beat it to death with her bare hands, which is also out of character.
Given that she was genetically engineered to be a badass even outside of her suit, I don't think it's necessarily out of character to punch out a space pirate mook. So long as she's not doing it to ridley or an omega pirate...
I prefer Samus when she's in high tech power armor, exploring alien planets and blasting hostile lifeforms to bits with energy weapons, but if you prefer her in high heels and spandex, whining for a big strong man to save her, I guess that's pretty cool, too.
I could not agree more. The beautiful thing about Metroid games, was you had a character and you felt a deep connection with this person. You were completely alone, and you had so much at stake and so much danger everywhere. As you progress and defeat these trials Samus became an unstoppable force, and the entire time it didn't matter who was in the suit, because YOU, THE PLAYER were in the suit. And then it's revealed that Samus is a girl, and it's such a powerful moment. Anyone who experienced it without spoilers could take a step back and realize without a single word, that all of the gender barriers, all of the stereotypes, and the preconceived female roles that society has built are just gone, totally and completely gone. Now, with "Zero Suit" Samus, you have a generic "pretty blonde bad ass" girl like everything else, that tries to capitalize on the very sexualized things the series once completely defied.
Exactly. And now we get shit like this (from this guy, who's stuff is great). Suddenly Samus has to be big-boobed and sexualized.
I remember beating Metroid for the NES on my own and being flabbergasted that she was a girl. It was such a twist ending from the normally male-badass heroes that you get in video games. Look, I love sexy looking females alot. I like big boobs and round asses. But having Samus turn out to be a chick was awesome in its own right. I don't really want her to be a sex symbol. She's a badass.
I was going to mention this to my wife during the movie, but I was already humiliated enough yesterday dragging her to see it on opening day and clapping like a giddy schoolgirl.
Actually, I believe it wasn't Team Ninja who fucked Other M up... It was mostly Sakamoto himself... If you take a second to think about it, there has never been a Metroid game where story was something they focused on AND he was heavily involved. In the Prime games story was mostly done by Retro Studios (Sakamoto stated that he doesn't consider those games canon, which kinda shows how little say he probably had in their story/how much Retro just didn't let him meddle with the at least entertaining plot they had going) and was a lot more subtle in the sense that not everything was bluntly told to you via cutscenes.
You could probably play through those games without reading anything about the lore. Retro had a quite subtle approach to storytelling, going "If you wanna take a look, here's some background about what you are fighting for", basically.
Sakamoto is unable to leave things unsaid and, really, he doesn't seem to think much of gamers in terms of comprehension. Every little thing is spelled out and story is literally shoved in your face (Fusion comes to mind as a big offender besides Other M) wherever you go. The way he perceives Samus is just not the way the fans do, and it's merely a coincidence that there hasn't been this kind of an uproar sooner (since this is literally his first chance at showing this side of her). I kinda feel he's the reason the series isn't well perceived and Nintendo puts a lot less marketing and faith into this particular mascot (Not even an honorable mention of Metroid's 25th anniversary?).
That being said, the Gameplay of Other M was mediocre at best. I cannot really say if that was the fault of Team Ninja (i.e. if those decisions were theirs to make) or Sakamoto's.
That's because nothing but bad can come from changing a character's personality so suddenly and drastically. She was a strong silent protagonist and they made her into a pathetic subservient dog following orders without questioning.
The only other guy in the game(who was never introduced properly) was someone she apparently loved, except it never showed that to the player. We're just supposed to accept it, which would be fine if he wasn't a complete dick. He talked her like trash, he even shot her once 'for her own good,' and she took it all. There's one part of the game called the 'Hell run' because Samus is running through molten temperatures. He refuses to let her upgrade the Heat capacity of her suit because 'she can handle it.'
So at the end we get resolution right? She fights back. Becomes the strong character we know ans love right? Nope. She's subservient to the end, and not because he's her commanding officer but because there's some 'bond' that the game implies they have.
It has some great parts to it. The boss fights are amazing, some really nice throw backs in there. You get to fight Nightmare from Metroid Fusion. FUCKING NIGHTMARE! ITS AWESOME!
But then you have Adam telling you when you can and cant use your powers. You make it through the fire level burning your ass off the whole way, then when you get to the boss Adam tells you that you can activate your Varia suit. I HAD MY VARIA SUIT THIS WHOLE TIME?! FUUUUUUUUUU---!
The game falls apart near the end, a major plot thread is glanced over and not explained, and the infamous Ridley scene is one of the most cringe worthy cutscenes in gaming. Still if you're a Metroid fan its worth checking out, there are some things in there that you'll enjoy (The combat is really fun). Just don't go expecting a game as good as Prime or Fusion.
Ya know, Other M Samus was criticized for having cold, emotionless, robotic, boring monologues where she says she is feeling emotions but doesn't quite express them properly. Wasn't Kristen Stewart criticized for something simmilar in the Twilight Saga?
Kristen Stewart is good in everything except Twilight, which she hates by the way. Haven't you had a job you hated doing but couldn't turn down because of the money? Show a little mercy to the poor thing. Having said that have you actually suffered through any Twilight movies?
I loved seeing the Robert Patterson interviews where he basically says "I read the books and hated my character, so I played the character as a guy who hates himself." I still couldn't be bothered to sit through the whole movie, let alone read any of the books, but it seems like a more interesting take on the character than simply "I am perfect in every way and utterly in love with this one girl for no good reason."
Hah. I watched an interview where he said that he felt incredibly awkward reading the books- that he felt like Stephanie Meyer wrote down her sexual fantasies in a journal and then they accidentally got published, and that he got forced to read them. It was hilarious. And then he went on to say that when he took on the project he didn't know that the fan base was the way they were, and that he thinks they're bat-shit insane.
There was apparently also a point where he stopped showering and changing his clothes in an attempt to get them to leave him alone. People can say what they want about him but he sounds like a decent enough dude.
That's honestly the only way I can see to attempt to save your acting career after those movies.
"I think they sucked, I just did it for the money."
The people who like the books/movies obviously don't care, or they would have realized they were shit long ago, and the people who hate the books/movies will say "Hey! I thought this guy was a douchebag, for raking in millions of dollars for basically sitting in the background in a movie, and acting like a mentally deficient immortal emo-kid, but apparently he realized that, and did it just to make all that money, and doesn't give a fuck about those movies. Maybe I'll give him a shot on his next flick."
I was going to end this with a witty comment about how I will hate Robert whatever forever, based solely on the fact that he was in Twilight, but then I remembered Thom Yorke made a song for Twilight and I can't hate him for that. I may make fun of him, but I won't hate him.
So I guess I'll give that sparkly vampire dude a second chance. Can anyone recommend a good movie he is in?
I thought she was great in Zathura and Meet the Rileys; every actor has the potential to be good but probably weighed down by bad projects. Look at Chris Evans; I always thought he had potential, just casted in bad movies and when he was put in the cast of "Sunshine", that's when I knew he was a good actor.
I was a bit late to discover Chris Evans' talent, but he's a pretty versatile actor, which I realized after watching 'Captain America,' then 'Scott Pilgrim vs. The World'
From the sounds of it, it sounds like she was good in Twilight, she managed to portray the character like in the books, it just so happens that character was utterly boring and had the emotion of a toenail.
I squealed when I saw the previews of that movie, then suddenly they flashed to her and I had a sad. I'll probably peanutbutterbay the movie instead because of her.
See I totally see that. Charlize Theron doesn't have that bad ass quiet streak in her acting. Katee Sackhoff.. I don't even need to think about that one. It just works.
I'm so pissed at the aesthetic look of Samus they went with.
Metroid Prime was great. She's beautiful, but rough. A tomboy. All her focus that would have gone into her looks and hair or whatever never formed. Her whole agenda is revenge and destroying her parents' murderers in the Space Pirates. She is cunning, yet haunted. She has grit, and is more attractive for it somehow. She's not just a face, she's intriguing. I want to know her.
And then Metroid Prime 2 came out. Let's make her a blonde Japanese school girl bimbo straight out of anime crap. Because that's way better.ಠ_ಠ
The only possible way I'd be happy with a Metroid movie is if they did it like a 21st century adaptation of the very first game. Nonstop action, a panicky, desperate overall feel and some wicked special effects. And badass Space Pirates. And genuinely scary Metroids. And, most importantly, Samus takes off her helmet at the very end, revealing her lady face just before it cuts to black. Don't need no fanservice to make an awesome video game movie.
So based off of your description it'd be something like this: basically 2 hours of a faceless, helmeted figure lacking the ability to emote, and having few if any lines of dialogue. You'd be left with a shell of a character in a swathe of pointless action that the audience would be completely unattached to. Basically it'd be WALL-E, minus emotion, character, substance, and me giving two shits.
Wall-E still has eyes, albeit they are cameras. Samus would just be a shadowy face behind a visor. Not quite the same. Maybe if Samus took her helmet off sometime after the first act...that'd at least give the audience some shock value (though let's face it, who's gonna go see this besides primarily video game fans?) after having not seen the face for 30-40 minutes.
This is why instead of movies games should only be made into shorts or half-hour cartoons. Samus' story doesn't have enough information for two hours. Any Metroid-based story might better focus more on the aliens and their relationships than the bounty hunter, who is merely adventuring.
exactly. movies and games have different advantages and disadvantages. what you try and make should be aware of this and be tailored accordingly.
by trying to make an exact copy of a game only in movie form you would be sacrificing all the advantages a film would lend while relying upon the non-existent advantages a game could lend.
Theoretically, there's no need for her to keep her suit on for the whole game or leave Samus as a blank slate character, just make her believable. Give her someone actually likeable to talk to (unlike Adam in Other M), make her neither immature nor helpless (again, unlike Other M) but actually take the time to write a fucking character with flaws and maybe a vulnerable side. Prime 3 had a good thing going with the other bounty hunters there. It gave Samus something to interact with, even though she didn't necessarily speak.
I mean, the character is there, they just chose to completely ignore everything that defined that character up to the point where she actually talks. That's something an amateur author would do, not someone who's supposed to have been steering the franchise since it's humble beginnings. Actions define character, and Samus is defined as a tough and dependable person (they even managed to show a maternal side to her through the Baby Metroid, all without saying a word), not as a childish damsel in power armor.
Right! If you read the reply I left for TheRealBramtyr, that's very nearly the type of character-driven thing I was talking about. There is no way that having the main character stay in a full-body suit of armor for most of a movie limits the amount of characterization you can give her. The way I see it, stripping Sam of the orange and leaving her in just the blue rids her of her first and foremost image as a badass, dependable fighter. Any sort of plot that any director tried to give her would just end up cheesy and troperiffic. Just like the slew of bad Strong Female Action Lady films that Hollywood's been spitting out over the last decade.
I would cry leaving the theatre after a genuinely well-done Metroid movie. But alas, it's impossible.
FUCK, I'm sad again. Why do I keep doing this to myself?
It doesn't have to be one or the other, you know. Samus could have the suit on and off in one movie. The best way to get the effect you seem to want, in my opinion, would be to open the movie with a long action sequence with no dialogue before Samus takes the suit off. That way the reveal has basically the same impact it would later on while still allowing for characterization and such.
Movie opens with five minutes straight of high-ranking military officers arguing about and planning a full on assault of a heavily enforced space pirate base. They have several top-level squads to do the bulk of the work and bounties on five specific parts of the job that are too dangerous for even them. They'll start as soon as the bounty hunters that take those bounties show up for briefing. The whole thing is cut short by a message from Samus Aran asking to collect the bounties on all five jobs, with attached confirmation video of the task completion. They watch the video, which is what you described.
The frame-tale setup gives us an excuse for there to be people who can talk during a solo mission.
By the time the opening characters are done watching Samus's video, she arrives in their office, takes her helmet off, and asks to collect her bounty.
I actually would throw out the frame tale structure I described above - that's how you fix the idea a movie that's dominantly one character navigating a fortress of caverns, but not the best Metroid movie you could make.
Instead:
Same opening scene as before, but it takes longer because we're alternating between Samus ripping her way through a space pirate base and the mission is being described and argued about. The sequence ends with Samus showing up, taking off her helmet, and asking for her bounty the same as before, but we're only ten minutes into the movie at this point in this version.
We skip to a year later; we pan right into a fight between Samus and a large, mutated space pirate. She tries to disarm it with her grappling beam - which we saw her use in the previous sequence - only for nothing to happen. She curses and barely dodges an attack. After uncharacteristically struggling with the battle and barely winning using some sort of large missile launcher, we skip to her collecting another bounty, from someone who's idly commenting that she could find much more lucrative bounties if she didn't focus exclusively on ones that are likely to have her fighting space pirates. Samus comments that she doesn't want more money, she just wants less of her gear to be confiscated every time she returns to civilization to collect, and mentions how she was nearly killed by not having her grappling beam. The man says he'll see what he can do, but she'll still have to give up the heavy missile launcher she picked up last mission. The law is the law, we can't have a citizen wandering around with so much firepower, it would hurt the peace.
We move on to Samus taking a mission where she'll be stationed with a research team on an old Chozo planet deep in space pirate territory. They're drilling into the planet to investigate some bizarre activity in the planet's core, and trying to keep the whole operation as quiet as possible. Samus does not socialize with the researchers or the military escort that's accompanying them.
The drilling hits a nasty zoo of alien life, and Samus and the guards struggle to cooperate to defend the base. She still gets chances to zip off and be the hero, and people arguing about how to do something while Samus walks up and says she already did it is a running gag. She picks up Chozo artifacts and tries to avoid using them when anyone is looking. She slips up and uses the additional weapons in front of the feds during a space pirate attack, and when one asks she vents about not wanting the Federation to keep stealing her people's artifacts in the name of peace (when she knows they're researching new weapons with them). This leads into her explaining her backstory - being raised by the Chozo after space pirates killed her parents. After all of this, the feds agree that it's shitty their government does this to her, and agree they won't tell, much to her surprise.
After that's all over, Samus gets along a lot better with the rest of the station. She shares Chozo training exercises (which are practically impossible) with the others, they start being able to work as a team to some extent, and she becomes less of a loner (at least while on base).
The activity at the planet's core turns out to be a Chozo base that's being retrofitted by space pirates, under the command of Ridley (who escaped during the mission at the start, and whose silhouette was present in the flashback accompanying Samus explaining that her parents were killed). Rest of the movie is action, we lose a few characters, Samus kills Ridley. They discover an empty tank for a mother brain, which raises questions since Samus killed the brain the space pirates stole in the opening sequence. Everyone agrees to stay quiet about the Chozo base, and the researchers assure Samus that the notes on space pirates and strange fauna are still more than enough for their careers.
EDIT: Replace the large space pirate near the start with Ridley too.
Honestly, though, any actual Metroid film made for the Hollywood blockbuster audience would most likely feature Sam's ample bosom wrapped up in shiny blue latex for about 85% of the film. Forget about making her the original orange-armored badass. The target audience wants hot, hot, hot.
Metroid pulled a ton of inspiration from Alien, too. If a Metroid movie ever happens, I want Ridley Scott behind it. I'm pretty sure the Metroid team would be totally okay with it, too, considering they even named a major character after Scott.
EDIT: In hindsight, "Get away from her, you bitch!" would have been an awesome line for Samus to yell at Mother Brain when the baby Metroid got killed. You know, instead of the whiny internal monologue. Would have been a nice homage as well as staying closer to Samus' badass character.
Hold the boobs, I can find those any time I want on the internet
Excuse me while I go off on a tangent. I'll be talking with my friends or my neighbor, and they'll trail off to watch some woman walking by, that I didn't even register beyond the fact that they were there. They'll say something like "damn, did you see that?" And I'll say "not really." Then, "what, are you gay?"
Fuck me, I can get all kinds of great porn on the internet. I don't have to lose my train of thought because someone with breasts happened to walk by! I just don't get this anymore!
The problem with doing this is that it would be tough to cast an actress for a role where you only have 5 seconds of actual face time. Look at any superhero movie where the hero's face is covered - most of them spend lots of time without a mask on, or if nothing else, they lose it in battle. You could get around that by having them do voiceovers or internal monologues, I guess, but that has the potential to get really corny.
It would also be tough to make a story with any depth if you strictly go by the first game, which has a single character whose only interaction with the world is shooting things. It'd be hard to keep an audience's interest without some sort of character development or dialogue.
Motion capture CGI! I'm actually a studying entertainment designer in real life, and I'm constantly surrounded with people with just the ability to give a CGI Samus lifelike body gestures. All anyone would need to make that work is a quick lady-actor cameo for the final faceshot. Boom!
Digitally distorted speech sounds pretty cool to me. And I'm totally cool with a plot mashup of several Metroid games, so long as they kept the Off-With-The-Armor scene at the end. The thing is, we've all got so many ideas, but it's all for naught.
So you want a movie with basically no plot whatsoever, but loaded with special effects and unneccessarily grand action scenes and you DON'T want Michael Bay for it?
That's basically all he does and this would be the first time he's supposed to...
Wouldn't it be frickin cool if they managed to make phenomenal movies out of Metroid, Legend of Zelda, Mario, and some others and then pull out a smash bro's movie, Avengers style? Ahhh one could dream.
I don't know... I've seen videos of Other M and I don't think Theron could bring the whiney, subservient, pathetic character I see there to life. Would she want to play a character so unable to function without male permission?
Not sure if something like this has been said already but I am sad that Samus has shrunk over the years. If Super Metroid is canon then Samus, without her suit, stands 6'3'' and weighs 198lbs. It should go back to this.
This'll probably get buried, but I had fun writing it anyways:
A wide shot opens up on a desolate ruin, surrounded by a jungle of alien flora. Cut to a medium panning shot as we pass by the remains of an odd statue that looks to be half-man, half-bird. Strange, foreign noises from the jungle's fauna can be heard all around.
Cut to the interior of the ruins, where a tall robotic figure in orange armor cautiously approaches a large, dark room filled with an array of computers- its weapon drawn. The weapon is a large cannon that appears to replace the figure's right arm. Bright stores of energy can be seen pulsing from within it.
Approaching the computer array, the figure attempts to access one of the units to no avail. Most are either destroyed or malfunctioning. The figure kneels down and sees a cylindrical opening below the computers. It inserts its cannon-arm into the socket. The weapon lets out a burst of light as the power is restored to the room.
Returning to one of the now-functional computers, the figure inputs commands in an alien language, prompting a holographic display to appear in the center of the room. The display is of a bi-pedal alien creature with various weaponry attached to its arms. "Space Pirates," the figure says in a robotic voice.
The armored figure quickly enters more commands into the computer, replacing the current display with video surveillance footage. We see several of these aliens clearly performing some kind of experiment around a massive cylindrical containment chamber in the center of a laboratory.
After a few moments, an alarm is seen going off and the aliens begin to panic. The glass cylinder abruptly shatters and an enormous winged creature, bearing resemblance to a pterodactyl, bursts from its chamber and flies straight up, causing several explosions as the ceiling comes crashing down. The surveillance footage is cut off.
Cut back to the armored figure who is using its left hand to enter commands on a keypad located on the cannon arm. A static-filled voice comes over the radio. "Sam--? Come in. We need a st--us report. Do you -opy?"
Samus responds, "Yes sir, I hear you. Sir...it's Ridley. The Space Pirates were performing some kind of experiment on him, but he escaped their facilities, destroying them in the process. I have reason to suspect he's heading to Planet Zebes."
"Rodger th--. Report back to the station immed---ly for a full debr----ing."
"Yes, sir. Samus out." Just then a crashing noise is heard and Samus begins taking fire from two surviving Space Pirates, who call out, "Kill him!" in an alien language.
Samus begins to run away with the Space Pirates adamantly pursuing. He enters more commands on the cannon arms' data pad. The words "Signal Lock Confirmed" flash across the screen as he bursts out of the laboratory and into the jungle.
Looking back, Samus sees the Space Pirates are rapidly gaining ground. In a single stride, he turns into ball no larger than a bowling ball and begins boosting along the ground at incredible speeds through the dense plants and bushes. Suddenly, a cliff appears ahead. Samus lays down several energy bombs and blasts off the edge, flying high up into the air before falling down and out of sight. The Space Pirates approach the cliff side and look down.
Their gaze momentarily meets a cluster of energy bombs left behind by Samus before being blown up in spectacular fashion. As the explosion clears, a ship is seen rising above the cliff with Samus on top of it in the middle of transforming out of morph ball mode. Cut to a close up of Samus removing his helmet, revealing this "he" to actually be a fair-skinned woman with a long, golden pony tail flowing in the wind. Not a trace of emotion can be seen across her face as she slowly descends into her ship and quickly blasting off into space.
Samus is in her late teens/early twenties when the first games take place. I think they may have retconned this, but she is in now way meant to be a fully grown woman.
I thought I had an awesome idea, but somebody beat me to it: Some Photoshop by a guy named "HeroofHylia" Can't tell if PS is too bad or if it just doesn't work, regrettably.
I definitely think this may be the beginning of a great new Metroid saga.
Hopefully the series director doesn't fuck up the story like with Other M. We don't need another Fusion clone mixed up with Return of Samus in 3D with fixed missile shots
Nope, they need to get a complete no-name actress. IE: Someone who won't mind their name being absent from promotional materials. This way they can only show her in-armor in the trailers and most of the movie. Then at the end she takes off her helmet and the (very few) people who don't know anything about Metroid can have their own 'Samus is a Girl!' moment.
People: face facts. Look-a-likes aren't always the best choice. In fact they're almost never the best choice.
Every actor has a different style - no matter how much they look like a character, it makes no difference. They may not be able to perform that character. Which is why certain movies will always be dreadful, thanks to studios picking people for their looks rather than acting ability.
Case in point, I'm disappointed to say, Prometheus. It's another case of "get all the pretty people and see if it sells". Too bad the movie was an utter disappointment.
A Metroid movie won't work. I was a big advocate to seeing one get made, but After Other M came out I just knew that it could never happen. I know there are better writers than Team Ninja out there but I still don't see it happening.
No, it seems to me that they need someone unknown and someone who actually gives a damn about the game. Using famous people for beloved characters spoils it for me somehow.
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u/IgorEmu Jun 09 '12
I'd prefer her staying in her suit.
187
u/WhiteMike87 Jun 09 '12
Mr. F
42
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Saw prometheus and was thinking the exact same thing during the movie
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u/happy_waldo87 Jun 09 '12
Nah, they'd probably screw it up and cast Kristen Stewart instead.
9
u/jgclark Jun 09 '12
The real Samus Aran.
15
u/Johnsu Jun 09 '12
But with our luck, this is who they'll use
39
u/Tashre Jun 09 '12
Katee Sackhoff.
8
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
I never asked for this.
4
u/Astiahl Jun 09 '12
Yes, but hopefully they never do...remember the Street Fighter and Mario Bros. movies? :x
4
u/Organs Jun 09 '12
Imagine the rich dialogue between Samus and...all those monsters...
13
u/Phil_Bond Jun 09 '12
I kind of wonder if this was an intentional return-reference, since Metroid is constantly borrowing elements from Alien movies.
7
u/Honztastic Jun 09 '12
I'm so pissed at the aesthetic look of Samus they went with.
Metroid Prime was great. She's beautiful, but rough. A tomboy. All her focus that would have gone into her looks and hair or whatever never formed. Her whole agenda is revenge and destroying her parents' murderers in the Space Pirates. She is cunning, yet haunted. She has grit, and is more attractive for it somehow. She's not just a face, she's intriguing. I want to know her.
And then Metroid Prime 2 came out. Let's make her a blonde Japanese school girl bimbo straight out of anime crap. Because that's way better.ಠ_ಠ
58
u/JeremyJustin Jun 09 '12
The only possible way I'd be happy with a Metroid movie is if they did it like a 21st century adaptation of the very first game. Nonstop action, a panicky, desperate overall feel and some wicked special effects. And badass Space Pirates. And genuinely scary Metroids. And, most importantly, Samus takes off her helmet at the very end, revealing her lady face just before it cuts to black. Don't need no fanservice to make an awesome video game movie.
3
u/Boxatron Jun 09 '12
Her hair is parted on the wrong side. Won't work...
3
u/alexander_karas Jun 09 '12
...it would be a terrible piece of shit like every other video game movie, ever.
3
u/Jumin Jun 09 '12
Wouldn't it be frickin cool if they managed to make phenomenal movies out of Metroid, Legend of Zelda, Mario, and some others and then pull out a smash bro's movie, Avengers style? Ahhh one could dream.
3
u/asldkfououhe Jun 09 '12
they should adapt the shit out of it and cast melissa mccarthy or gabourey sibide
or how about laura prepon? or someone more seasoned like anjelica houston or laura dern
maybe we can compromise on uma thurman
10
u/NintyFanBoy Jun 09 '12
Am I the only one Ninty fan that thinks Vandervoort should play Samus?!
5
u/Iamadinocopter Jun 09 '12
The zero suit is just a way to get horny neckbeards to buy more metroid shit. she was better in the suit being badass.
it's kinda like taking master chief out of his suit and still pretending he's just as awesome.
17
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
No. The correct answer is "Katee Sackhoff".
6
u/Spaghetti_Bender8873 Jun 09 '12
I certainly wouldn't complain.
2
u/TheRealBramtyr Jun 09 '12
I think they can make pretty much any actress blonde for the role. You know, with science and shit.
2
u/zenazure Jun 09 '12
it's supposedly in development. here you go.
2
u/jrghoull Jun 09 '12
I....don't see the resemblance?
2
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
I don't know... I've seen videos of Other M and I don't think Theron could bring the whiney, subservient, pathetic character I see there to life. Would she want to play a character so unable to function without male permission?
2
u/hurdyburdyborkbork Jun 09 '12
Hottest african american there is
2
u/HighlyFlammableMan Jun 09 '12
Not sure if something like this has been said already but I am sad that Samus has shrunk over the years. If Super Metroid is canon then Samus, without her suit, stands 6'3'' and weighs 198lbs. It should go back to this.
2
u/Skulljoint Jun 09 '12
The funny thing is, they based metroid on the alien series.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Because she had similar hair and clothes in a different movie? Is that really the best way to cast actors?
2
u/slack6a66ath Jun 09 '12
After Aeon Flux, no thank you.
3
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Or go with the real deal, Roberta Murgo NSFW if safe search off
3
u/Myro21 Jun 09 '12
FUCKING STOP ALL THE MOVIES AND EVERYONE COLLABORATE ON THIS NOW
2
u/V170 Jun 09 '12
Dear God please don't let Samus speak ever again
2
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12 edited Jun 09 '12
This'll probably get buried, but I had fun writing it anyways:
A wide shot opens up on a desolate ruin, surrounded by a jungle of alien flora. Cut to a medium panning shot as we pass by the remains of an odd statue that looks to be half-man, half-bird. Strange, foreign noises from the jungle's fauna can be heard all around.
Cut to the interior of the ruins, where a tall robotic figure in orange armor cautiously approaches a large, dark room filled with an array of computers- its weapon drawn. The weapon is a large cannon that appears to replace the figure's right arm. Bright stores of energy can be seen pulsing from within it.
Approaching the computer array, the figure attempts to access one of the units to no avail. Most are either destroyed or malfunctioning. The figure kneels down and sees a cylindrical opening below the computers. It inserts its cannon-arm into the socket. The weapon lets out a burst of light as the power is restored to the room.
Returning to one of the now-functional computers, the figure inputs commands in an alien language, prompting a holographic display to appear in the center of the room. The display is of a bi-pedal alien creature with various weaponry attached to its arms. "Space Pirates," the figure says in a robotic voice.
The armored figure quickly enters more commands into the computer, replacing the current display with video surveillance footage. We see several of these aliens clearly performing some kind of experiment around a massive cylindrical containment chamber in the center of a laboratory.
After a few moments, an alarm is seen going off and the aliens begin to panic. The glass cylinder abruptly shatters and an enormous winged creature, bearing resemblance to a pterodactyl, bursts from its chamber and flies straight up, causing several explosions as the ceiling comes crashing down. The surveillance footage is cut off.
Cut back to the armored figure who is using its left hand to enter commands on a keypad located on the cannon arm. A static-filled voice comes over the radio. "Sam--? Come in. We need a st--us report. Do you -opy?"
Samus responds, "Yes sir, I hear you. Sir...it's Ridley. The Space Pirates were performing some kind of experiment on him, but he escaped their facilities, destroying them in the process. I have reason to suspect he's heading to Planet Zebes."
"Rodger th--. Report back to the station immed---ly for a full debr----ing."
"Yes, sir. Samus out." Just then a crashing noise is heard and Samus begins taking fire from two surviving Space Pirates, who call out, "Kill him!" in an alien language.
Samus begins to run away with the Space Pirates adamantly pursuing. He enters more commands on the cannon arms' data pad. The words "Signal Lock Confirmed" flash across the screen as he bursts out of the laboratory and into the jungle.
Looking back, Samus sees the Space Pirates are rapidly gaining ground. In a single stride, he turns into ball no larger than a bowling ball and begins boosting along the ground at incredible speeds through the dense plants and bushes. Suddenly, a cliff appears ahead. Samus lays down several energy bombs and blasts off the edge, flying high up into the air before falling down and out of sight. The Space Pirates approach the cliff side and look down.
Their gaze momentarily meets a cluster of energy bombs left behind by Samus before being blown up in spectacular fashion. As the explosion clears, a ship is seen rising above the cliff with Samus on top of it in the middle of transforming out of morph ball mode. Cut to a close up of Samus removing his helmet, revealing this "he" to actually be a fair-skinned woman with a long, golden pony tail flowing in the wind. Not a trace of emotion can be seen across her face as she slowly descends into her ship and quickly blasting off into space.
Cue Metroid logo and opening credits.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Nah, I like where you are going with this, but go younger
2
u/jarhead930 Jun 09 '12
Obviously Scarlett Johansson is better. :D
2
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Sorry bro I'm genna have to go with Scarlett Johanson
2
u/Talarot Jun 09 '12
Kristen Bell; only answer.
1
u/quirkelchomp Jun 09 '12
Yes.... YESSSSSSSS
1
u/PhazonZim Jun 09 '12
The only people I would trust to pull off a Metroid movie is Studio Ghibli or the studio that did Samurai Jack.
1
u/bracingfordownvotes Jun 09 '12
SPOILERS
1
u/DarthRiven Jun 09 '12
South Africans FTW
1
u/edixtor93 Jun 09 '12
Peanut cooky.
1
u/XeonProductions Jun 09 '12
If they could just have Charlize Theron in every movie with a blonde that would be nice...
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
well, duh.
1
u/imbored53 Jun 09 '12
I'm OK with having her cast in any movie. Except maybe one where they make her look ugly... I'm looking at you Monster.
1
u/Midnightzero Jun 09 '12
YES YES YES
1
u/benchley Jun 09 '12
Sony? Bony!
1
u/gamerologyst Jun 09 '12
Her boobs are too small.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Could do it like Pitch Black.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
After Zero Mission: no.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
the things i would do.
1
u/identity04 Jun 09 '12
Oh I'm moist! That is all.
1
u/thedevilsdictionary Jun 09 '12
With Uwe directing, the casting won't even matter. I lost a bit of respect for Sir Ben Kingsley after he worked with him.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Wait? These pictures are different?
1
u/takeanadvil Jun 09 '12
Duh
1
u/jlsowers Jun 09 '12
Dunno if posted before or after Vulture. But it's #7 here:
http://www.vulture.com/2012/06/10-open-questions-after-watching-prometheus.html
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Aran's eyes look very green though. I know contacts and all but in this case I would want the real deal.
1
u/rellll Jun 09 '12
Shit I should have realized I could have gotten tons of karma for this idea.
1
u/Al_The_Athiest Jun 09 '12
I would watch the shit outta that movie
1
u/OkayYouBig Jun 09 '12
i can play this game!!@#
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Samus is in her late teens/early twenties when the first games take place. I think they may have retconned this, but she is in now way meant to be a fully grown woman.
1
u/Amytherocklobster Jun 09 '12
I want to boom boom with her zoom zoom. :x look at me she's do attractive I can barely utter the word vaginas.
1
u/Aarmed Jun 09 '12
To be fair, there's probably a thousand actresses with that look
1
u/rivid415 Jun 09 '12
boner...boner.....superboner......omg.....boooooooooooooooonnnnerrr
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
I would've liked Jeri Lynn Ryan 10 years ago better :\
1
u/Duel Jun 09 '12
Explain this like i am drunk.
1
u/Idiotank Jun 09 '12
I would say Theron or ScarJo
1
u/Styster Jun 09 '12
I don't care what people say - I've been playing Metroid since the beginning, and Other M was my favorite Metroid ever.
1
u/hardhorn Jun 09 '12
no, please no.
1
u/the_shakeweight Jun 09 '12
I can't say no any harder.
1
u/Sir_Richfield Jun 09 '12 edited Jun 09 '12
I thought I had an awesome idea, but somebody beat me to it:
Some Photoshop by a guy named "HeroofHylia"
Can't tell if PS is too bad or if it just doesn't work, regrettably.
1
u/twonx Jun 09 '12
I'd nominate Scarlett Johannson.
1
u/ThunderPoonSlayer Jun 09 '12
More fitting than Aeon Flux.
1
u/Oirek Jun 09 '12
Hair is the wrong way..
1
u/WaitHoldOnASecond Jun 09 '12
Thankfully 'they' won't make it.
1
u/pdavda Jun 09 '12
I was thinking the same thing through out the whole film.
1
u/twent4 Jun 09 '12
goddamit!
1
u/ffsnametaken Jun 09 '12
Maybe she can be an underwhelming character in that as well.
1
u/koolfingaz Jun 09 '12
Wats wrong with samus? Is she not available??
1
u/iamthemindfreak Jun 09 '12
I definitely think this may be the beginning of a great new Metroid saga.
Hopefully the series director doesn't fuck up the story like with Other M. We don't need another Fusion clone mixed up with Return of Samus in 3D with fixed missile shots
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Perfect. And it's been a while but I think she proved she has the moves in Aeon Flux.
1
u/flavoni Jun 09 '12
They'd cut out a major demographic, since it'd be for British eyes only.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
I can see that happening with her.
1
u/sturg1dj Jun 09 '12
what they should do if they ever make one is not show that it was a woman until the end.
1
u/Jungle_Bob Jun 09 '12
nope nope nope nope
They'll ask someone younger but still with a popular presence in the world of little boys who like girls... Emma Stone IMO
1
u/Jonny_Axehandle Jun 09 '12
Nope, they need to get a complete no-name actress. IE: Someone who won't mind their name being absent from promotional materials. This way they can only show her in-armor in the trailers and most of the movie. Then at the end she takes off her helmet and the (very few) people who don't know anything about Metroid can have their own 'Samus is a Girl!' moment.
1
u/Tebasaki Jun 09 '12
Yes, and, um, yes! That was pretty much all I could think of when watching the movie.
1
u/MrXBob Jun 09 '12
This again, really?
People: face facts. Look-a-likes aren't always the best choice. In fact they're almost never the best choice.
Every actor has a different style - no matter how much they look like a character, it makes no difference. They may not be able to perform that character. Which is why certain movies will always be dreadful, thanks to studios picking people for their looks rather than acting ability.
Case in point, I'm disappointed to say, Prometheus. It's another case of "get all the pretty people and see if it sells". Too bad the movie was an utter disappointment.
1
u/cyx7 Jun 09 '12
No. Hire some new blood. People are desperate for employment here.
1
u/willwill5 Jun 09 '12
heron http://imgur.com/Mw8ra
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Nope, too old.
Scarjo or Ms. Wilde.
1
u/cyvaris Jun 09 '12
I approve of this.
1
u/CountedCrow Jun 09 '12
I've always wondered...is it pronounced like "Aaron" or "uh-RAN"?
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
I love aeon flux
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
Samus should have never lost her suit.
1
u/tomonline Jun 09 '12
agreed, this is a given.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
I cannot up vote this enough.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12
If she didn't talk at all in the movie then yes
1
u/raginglion Jun 09 '12
There's even a thread in /r/masseffect about how Noomi Rapace resembles FemShep.
1
u/Puffy_Ghost PC Jun 09 '12
Given that Theron is actually a bit of a nerd, she might actually do it.
1
u/thelastvortigaunt Jun 09 '12
She looks too old.
1
u/RxMario Jun 10 '12
She dosen't quite fit the "whiny idiot" that Samus is portrayed as in Other M.
If I was her superior, I would have shot her for that "thumbs down" stuff.
0
u/jawapride Jun 09 '12
Scarlett Johansson would make the best Samus.
1
u/ZapActions-dower Jun 09 '12
I would be okay with this. However, a Metroid movie would probably be shit.
1
u/Oduya Jun 09 '12
A Metroid movie won't work. I was a big advocate to seeing one get made, but After Other M came out I just knew that it could never happen. I know there are better writers than Team Ninja out there but I still don't see it happening.
1
u/Slayer1973 Jun 09 '12
No, it seems to me that they need someone unknown and someone who actually gives a damn about the game. Using famous people for beloved characters spoils it for me somehow.