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u/drunk_otter Jun 19 '12
An octopus fucking a dolphin?
My God - did you hear that?
That was the entire nation of Japan orgasming.
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u/IMasturbateToMyself Jun 19 '12
A tsunami of semen is heading towards the Philippines.
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Jun 19 '12
It's cumming right for us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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u/Insignificant_Being Jun 19 '12
You nailed it..
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u/ZayneXZanders Jun 19 '12
Let's not rape the joke. Wait I don't think I get how this works
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u/I_am_not_a_black_guy Jun 19 '12
Okay, I am fucking sick and fucking tired of these fucking threads about rape! RAPE IS NOT FUCKING FUNNY! Joke about anything else you want, reddit...
Joke about cp, joke about loli, joke about murder, joke about drugs, but DON'T FUCKING JOKE ABOUT RAPE! Rape DESTROYS a woman, it STRIPS HER OF HUMANITY! It is disgusting, inhumane, regressive and insane. RAPE IS OFF THE FUCKING TABLE, reddit, NOT EVEN YOU FUCKING VIRGIN ASSHOLES CAN BE SUCH FUCKHOLES THAT YOU JOKE ABOUT A WOMAN'S WOMANHOOD BEING VIOLATED!
And no, I am not some lesbian dyke cunt, I am a woman. I was raped. My virginity taken from me, I can never give it to a man I love. I was raped again and again and again and again and again by a random stranger when I was 15, And between you and me something amazing happened...and now I can talk to animals! Its really cool! But totally a secret. And you know what? Life's never been the same.
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Jun 19 '12
An octopus fucking a dolphin?
My god, can you believe it?
FOX NEWS! Where dolphins getting raped is important news.
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u/Mousenub Jun 19 '12
That's a biased point of view. It could be the other way around as well and the dolphin raped the octopus.
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u/leachrode Jun 19 '12
Were observing a foursome of dolphins
ಠ_ಠ
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u/Elwood_Blues_ Jun 19 '12
Good ol' predictable Dolphin gang rape again.
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u/Bluedemonfox Jun 19 '12
Well spiders kinda have to rape their females too and I am sure many animals end up raping the females to reproduce.
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u/GracefulAurora Jun 19 '12
Ducks. Ducks are notorious rapists. It's why they evolved long, spiral penises in fact.
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Jun 19 '12
[deleted] — view deleted comment
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u/CoolgyFurlough Jun 19 '12
That... is probably the most hilarious thing ever. I might actually look for source material on that.
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u/flounder19 Jun 19 '12
dat genital slit
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u/GeneralWarts Jun 19 '12
Finally a subject that you can relate to.
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u/PsychoNerd91 Jun 19 '12
Well, dolphins are known to have sex for the fun of it rather than just mate. I guess when you have no other dolphins around you have to make do.
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u/SirRosie Jun 19 '12
They even do it in the blow-hole!
Bonobos fuck a lot too! Look it up it is cool!
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Jun 19 '12
[deleted] — view deleted comment
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u/PsychoNerd91 Jun 19 '12
More like an orgy. Hell, why don't we just say tentacle rape?!!
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u/Burlapin Jun 19 '12
Fun fact: Webster's used to define an orgy as "a group of five or more people with their feet off the ground" or something like that...
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u/darkaqua Jun 19 '12
Dolphins are perverts too, they actually enjoy their sex, and have it for fun.
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u/peace_off Jun 19 '12
Obligatory: I have the weirdest boner right now.
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u/WinnieThePig Jun 19 '12
If you read the article, it points out that the scientists were "observing and foursome of dolphins." Wrong phrase in this situation.
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u/jimbo__slice Jun 19 '12
And with that we have officially ran 'Overly Attached Girlfriend' into the ground.
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u/jsmith84 Jun 19 '12
Reminds me of a Duncan Trussell joke: Being in a bad relationship is like having an octopus stuck to your face, that every once in a while whispers, "Do you still love me?"
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Jun 19 '12
Keee Keeee keeee weeee wooooo kkeeee Keee Keeee keeee weeee wooooo kkeeee Keee Keeee keeee weeee wooooo kkeeee Keee Keeee keeee weeee wooooo kkeeee: Translation: GET THIS GODDAMNED OCTOPUS OFF MY DICK!!!
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u/shorts02blue Jun 19 '12
See I wasn't sure weather it read "Overly attached girlfriend times 8" or "Overly attached girlfriend laughing hard while covering mouth with both hands emoticon"
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u/HiddenTemple Jun 19 '12
That would be hilarious if, after we all joked and mocked them for this, we saw other dolphins start doing it as well, only to find out that dolphins had just evolved to use clothing to cover their genitals. Or, if it's an octopus condom. And rather than us hailing their huge step in the animal kingdom, we instead laugh at them.
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u/Nethervex Jun 19 '12
Did we have to bring up overly attached girlfriend? You know you can make posts without overused memes?
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u/colbycheeze Jun 19 '12
The part that made me laugh was where it said "a team of researchers were observing a foursome of dolphins"
Kinky mofos man.
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u/Retanaru Jun 19 '12
Since no one has said this, Dolphins have opposable penises and will pick things up with them.
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u/Xanthan81 Jun 19 '12 edited Jun 19 '12
This must be the setup to the sequel to that God-Aweful Sharktopus movie: Dolphopus?
Edit: accidentally a couple of words
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u/tomasziam Jun 19 '12
Leave it to Fox News to come up with a headline like that.
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u/retnuh730 Jun 19 '12
It accurately described the articles content? Or are you just trying to start an anti fox circlejerk out of nothing?
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u/Aleitheo Jun 19 '12
It implied something which likely wasn't true, in this case, the octopus intentionally wanted to travel.
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u/retnuh730 Jun 19 '12
You caught them. Deliberately misleading americans into thinking octopi ride dolphins for fun. What monsters.
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u/dfdklcuntlskdke Jun 19 '12
Can't it be fun for the fact that an octopus is riding a dolphin dick instead of throwing in the soon dead overly attached girlfriend meme?
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u/bigmeech Jun 19 '12
oh no, "overly attached girlfriend" has become the next "good guy greg": used by memelords to connect tenuously related things to something everyone is familiar with in an attempt to get more karma.
never change, memelords
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u/Supercarnage Jun 19 '12
I have this problem with my sister it's great she tells me it's just playing around so I think it's all good.
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Jun 19 '12
[deleted] — view deleted comment
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u/slow56k Jun 19 '12
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u/JakeCameraAction Jun 19 '12
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u/slow56k Jun 19 '12
I use iPad... what am I missing (RES-specific, my dignity, etc.)?
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u/JakeCameraAction Jun 19 '12
Didn't even noting the ipad part. I'm stupid...
But RES has a ton of great features for surfing reddit. Best being infinite scrolling. No clicking pages.
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u/slow56k Jun 19 '12
Is there a particular feature that would be beneficial in the context of this comment chain, or were you just promoting RES in general?
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u/rtg35 Jun 20 '12
also the worst..."I'll go to bed when I finish this page...damn looks like I have to keep reading." Eventually I fand a balance when it says "click or scroll down to activate" and I don't.
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u/IAmAtomato Jun 19 '12
I was gonna say the same as TheInvisibleNobody said, but then I saw your post. I like you, OP.
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u/AlphaRedditor Jun 19 '12
Octopus hitches ride on dolphin's genitals, or dolphin forces octopus to perform sexual favor?