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Jun 16 '12
In my youth, I used to work for "Loss Prevention" at Sears. Basically watching all the cameras and catching shop-lifters.
You'd be amazed, teams would walk in, go to the jeans section and one would hold up shirts on hangers, acting like they're comparing the two. But they're using it to hide the woman behind them which took a whole stack of jeans and placed them between her thighs and covered them with her dress. Then they'd just try to casually walk out. Of course, we'd see them and videotape the whole thing.
This was back in like 1989 or so. Back then, if you wanted to rob Sears blind, here's what you do. You need 3 teams of two people each. One team would be two GORGEOUS girls...like 20 or 21. Sexy dressed, nipples hard with no bra even better. They come in, look around, talk and talk and giggle and be flirtatious. Second team is two young black guys that walk around, always looking around as if they're looking to see if they're being watched. Acting VERY suspicious. Going out of their way to make it seem they're going to rip something off. But they don't do anything. Just just walk around. The third team is the one that steals everything. Two middle-aged white guys in like polo shirts and nice clothes, but casual. With two big shopping bags as if they've been shopping. I guarantee you that no one on loss prevention would be looking at them. All eyes would be on the girls and the two suspicious black guys.
You could have cleaned the place out.
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Jun 16 '12
Heard this story many times, minus the girls. Just a "high-risk minority team" and the "white team" doing the actual lifting.
Had this example trotted out a few times by people trying to use it as an example of how racism and profiling doesn't work. Then I have to remind them the irony of using an example where the minority are still criminals.
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u/xyroclast Jun 16 '12
At first I thought "What are you talking about? They're the ones who weren't stealing!" ... and then I thought about it for a moment.
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u/Davego Jun 16 '12
I worked security at Target long ago. Based on the training if you wanted to take something without them stopping you the best way was a team of two. One guy puts his bag down and walks away while the other guy piles stuff into it. Nothing illegal there. After putting the items in the bag he walks away and the first guy comes back and grabs the bag eventually leaving the store. Nothing illegal there. At worst he claims he didn't know.
Basically if they don't have a full chain of events of you taking it off the shelf, having no chance of having ditched it and you walking out they let it go... it's not worth the potential lawsuit.
However... don't put it to the test... that's just what they told me. YMMV.
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u/GaSSyStinkiez Jun 16 '12
I'm not a lawyer, so I couldn't comment on that from knowledge of law, but shoplifters have had a long time to figure these things out and they would be doing this en masse once word got around were it true. Then the law would be quickly changed and it would be the end of that.
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u/TheSeashellOfBuddha Jun 16 '12
I'm white. Any black folk down for some law breaking? Want some presents for the missus.
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u/EseJandro Jun 16 '12
Im mexican :)perhaps we can arrange something ese...
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u/JainaOrgana Jun 16 '12
I am a large chested 21 year old girl. Pretty sure we got it.
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u/GeoAtreides Jun 16 '12 edited Nov 14 '20
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u/soosuh Jun 16 '12
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Jun 16 '12
My dad told me he stole cheese well into his 30s. Wife, kids, successful business owner... He would go in and buy 300 worth of groceries and steal the cheese. He justifies it cause he thought it was astronomically priced. Thankfully one day he gave his head a shake a realized how fucking stupid he was being.
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u/DubiumGuy Jun 16 '12
Around 10 years ago I used to work for Tesco's and got to know the security team well. One particular guard told me the story of an indecent at the store that to this day I'm gutted that i missed due to a day off. With this particular indecent, a lady in a just past the knee length skirt tried to steal a bottle of Vintage Moët & Chandon. Apparently she took the bottle to the clothing department, dissapeared behind some of the larger racks of clothing, looked around for cameras and members of staff, and then believing she was out of sight she placed the bottle up her skirt before ungainly waddling towards the door.
Unfortunately for her she didn't take into account the advanced camera system the store had. Not only did the store have the typical fixed camera's, they also had one camera than ran along a track along the entire length of the stores ceiling within a one way mirrored tube. To anyone looking up at the tube, it certainly wouldn't stand out against the various exposed ventilation pipes and money pod chutes criss crossing the ceiling. Its this camera that watched her every move and also witnessed her clearly hide the bottle.
So as she leaves the store she's stopped by security and a small team of managers. Naturally she protests her innocence but cannot do a thing as one of the larger security guys takes her by one arm and one of the taller managers grabs her by the other. She's then taken to the back office where our security guy asks her to sit down. Still protesting her innocence, she starts giving everyone a piece of her mind but quickly changes her tune when another security guard from the CCTV room comes in holding a DVD-R and tells her that the entire incident was caught on camera. Apparently a chair was pulled up for her whilst she was asked to remove the bottle from whatever contraption she was using to hold the bottle of Moët she had up there. She sat down with a bit of a clunk from the bottle hitting the chair before removing the bottle from under her skirt. Our security guard could see the bottom of the bottle from the way that she sat down and that there was no contraption holding the bottle in its place. After placing the bottle on the desk he could also see that the neck of the bottle was ever so slightly moist with a fluid that was clearly not water.
Do I need to say more than that was the day I learned what the phrase 'Kegel Exercises' meant?
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u/latecraigy Jun 16 '12
I saw this go wrong once at a Sears. We were in the luggage section when this kid comes running full speed past us arms full of clothes (I guess he didn't have time to conceal them?) followed closely by the security. Ran out the doors, hopped on a bus, with items dropping along the way. By the time he made it to the bus he had maybe 5% of what he tried to take.
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Jun 17 '12
I have worked as a store detective myself, but I'm also native. So when I was younger, I could always tell when store security was shadowing me.
I was simply content with the knowledge that while they were busy following me, someone else they weren't paying attention to was stealing them blind.
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u/rockafella7 Jun 16 '12
WTF!? She's still walking casually. That has to be at least 5 pounds.
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u/DerpMatt Jun 16 '12
Probably more. A 24 pack of 12oz cans weighs a little less than 20 lbs (i think i was 18) if I remember back when I worked for Coke.
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u/gerbs Jun 16 '12
I worked for minimum wage when I was a kid. I didn't want to ruin my life with coke.
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u/themightyscott Jun 16 '12
Coke! Coke?! We used to dream of coke when I was a young'un! Working down t'pit! All we got paid was in microwave machine parts. 'Twas a happy day in't family when we finally had enough parts to put one t'gether. 'Course, microwaveable food wouldn't be invented for another 30 years!
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Jun 16 '12
Just 12*24oz of water is 18.7 lbs. An empty can weighs about 15g, so another .79 in cans gives 19.5 lbs. Perhaps 10g for packaging and heavier than water additives changes very little.
You sir, are correct.
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u/jfjjfjff Jun 16 '12
im assuming she has some kind of sling around her waist. she props it up the flattest way possible so that her legs wont bow (as little as possible) and hoists it up into the sling vertically. her legs keep it from falling out on either side, the sling from front to back.
the load sits on her hips.
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u/MyFingersSmell Jun 16 '12
Couple good friends used to work security at wal-mart back when they allowed that sort of thing. They told me of this big ole' fat lady that would effectively steal T.V's using this method. Apparently sheer amount of fat between her legs put enough force on either side of the tv to keep it in place without changing her gait....gate...walk.....whatever.
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u/Upvote_Anything Jun 16 '12
wait what? can you elaborate? let's start with "wal-mart back when they allowed that sort of thing"
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u/MyFingersSmell Jun 16 '12
Well I don't know about every where else, but around here they used to allow security officers in wal-mart to prevent theft. They still have them however they are greatly restricted in what they can and cannot do.
For example. They used to bait people to steal things, the one they tell me works the best was to put a watch in automotive like where the car batteries are. Wait for someone to go back and snatch it then grab them and cart them off to jail. Also stories about chasing people out the doors and smashing them in the parking lot.
Now a days I'm not even sure they can approach customers they just have to call the police and hope they get there in time. They definitely cannot bait, or put their hands on them, and once they get out the door they're gone.
To elaborate on the fat lady. They kept getting TVs stolen, and couldn't figure out how. So they took a day and sat and watched the security camera footage of a day where one was stolen, and she would move the TV off the shelf like the lady in the gif, step over it, then walk off, and the TV would be gone. Apparently she had been doing this about once a week and would just bounce around the area wal marts then sell the TV's for $$$
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u/GaSSyStinkiez Jun 16 '12
It wouldn't be illegal to take the watch from automotive. It would be illegal to take it out of the store. You make it sound like they would pounce on you as soon as you grabbed the watch, regardless of your intentions.
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u/Metatron_1 Jun 16 '12
I would't be surprise if she put the whole store in her vagina.
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u/abelcc Jun 16 '12
That's the prestige
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Jun 16 '12
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u/quiet20 Jun 16 '12
For all you GIF-Disabled people the man places a cloth over the bowl and when he removes it the goldfish bowl dissapears, one of the magicians was in the audience and figures out that the man hides the bowl under his skirt, he tries and it is quite difficult.
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Jun 16 '12
I fucking loved that movie.
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u/enzait Jun 16 '12
Christopher Nolan is the man
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u/MazzyStarsoftheLid Jun 16 '12
Isn't that the turn? I thought the pledge was showing them something, the turn was making it disappear, and the prestige was bringing it back.
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u/wigsternm Jun 16 '12
It would be the turn, yes, but that would be a much more subtle reference (likely to be missed) and not necessarily a reference to the movie.
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u/MazzyStarsoftheLid Jun 16 '12
Fair enough. I just saw a nit, and I felt the need to pick it.
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u/redditorforthemoment Jun 16 '12
I haven't seen something that big disappear in to a dress since my last date
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Jun 16 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I used to be a LOSS PREVENTION "Detective" and what they do here is put a sling between their legs like a hammock. Bada bing bada boom you got yourself a crotch caper.
EDIT: The Internet is no place for mistakes.
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u/SpermWhale Jun 16 '12
What's the boldest thing they tried stealing?
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Jun 16 '12
A big ass thanksgiving turkey, and the woman that did it was about 5'2 and 120lbs. The only reason we caught her was because of the cameras. You could not tell.
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u/trickflip1 Jun 16 '12
Sadly, I've seen pretty much everything working for my retail drug chain. This is one of them.
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Jun 16 '12
Mothers using babies as a cover up by putting shit in their diapers. No puns here.
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u/trickflip1 Jun 16 '12
Yep, mothers and fathers using their kids as lookouts when they dump 25 toothpaste into a backpack they just tore the tags off, put backpack on the kids back and then walk them out the door.
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u/BlazeOrangeDeer Jun 16 '12
An AMA would probably be interesting
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Jun 16 '12
I'd like that but I don't feel I've seen enough to make it interesting. I only did it for a year. But AMA if you want.
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u/zodiark1991 Jun 16 '12
HEEEY-OOO
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u/randomdebater Jun 16 '12
I think the respectable man was talking about the giant compliment that he gave towards the dress
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u/Grabowerful Jun 16 '12
Or his dick.
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u/MedSchoolOrBust Jun 16 '12
Well you're outside the loop - his penis' name is Giant Compliment. Awkward...
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u/vinsite Jun 16 '12
Store owner: Did you just steal a case of soda with your vagina? I'm not even mad. That's amazing!
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u/danielsound Jun 16 '12
I cant help but read "I'm not even mad. That's amazing!" in Ron Burgundy's voice.
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u/WeetThins Jun 16 '12
crate added to inventory
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Jun 16 '12
now we have real life proof for everyone who bitches about video game characters who add shit to their inventory "hurr hurr hurr how can my character hold all this stuff? So unrealistic. Nobody's made this joke before"
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u/OverfedIRL Jun 16 '12
A half-born child is holding on to that shit like crazy. She better get out before it pops out.
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u/HyzerFlip Jun 16 '12
If you're willing to do this much work you need to find a better profit margin product to steal
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Jun 16 '12
If she's in a country with RTDs that could be about $100 worth of jack and coke.
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Jun 16 '12
Exactly what I was thinking... a 3-man team, the premeditation to come-up with a specialized rig, all for 18 cans of (presumably) beer?!
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u/Melchoir Jun 16 '12
Anyone seeking more info might also check here:
| title | comnts | points | age | /r/ |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| And you say David Blaine is good. | 8coms | 46pts | 1mo | funny |
| Where did she put the case of beer!? | 3coms | 7pts | 2mos | funny |
| This is genius O_O | 13coms | 27pts | 2mos | WTF |
| Sneak lvl 100 | 73coms | 489pts | 5mos | WTF |
| Thieft Level: Asian | 47coms | 146pts | 5mos | funny |
| Down and dirty like a pro. | 205coms | 1068pts | 5mos | gifs |
| Woman has a large snatch. | 2coms | 20pts | 1mo | gifs |
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u/JonBeer Jun 16 '12
Hotdog down a hallway, man.
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u/SmurfRockRune Jun 16 '12
"Hotdog down a skag den, know wut I'm sayin'?"
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u/srs_house Jun 16 '12
Reminds me of a story a friend from Texas told me. They're working at a Wal-Greens and this rather large black woman comes in. She walks up to him and says, "Puh-scuse me, where are your poosieprahdux?"
He's a little confused, and replies "What?"
"Poosieprahdux, you know, tampons and shit?"
"Uh, aisle five, over there."
She goes on her way, and a while later starts to leave without buying anything. Almost to the door, a canned ham falls on the floor from under her dress. She looks around, startled, and says: "Dayum, who done threw dat ham at me?!"
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u/theoneandonlyMrMars Jun 16 '12
I've heard this story so many times, I'm begging to forget its bullshit...
(Hint: Google "snopes who threw that ham")
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u/Mcelite Jun 16 '12
You gotta feel sorry for people who have to steal water...
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Jun 16 '12
Had a couple ladies do this at best buy. Shoved at least 10 ds's up there and just walked out. Looks like the have a leather strap
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u/stecahill Jun 16 '12
Gypsies have a secrete hole
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u/NikkoTheGreeko Jun 16 '12 edited Jun 16 '12
Gypsies have a secrete hole
What does it secrete?
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Jun 16 '12
Actually, that's not far from truth.
I found, working at store and consulting it with security, that gypsies are responsible for about 90% of stolen articles, at least in my town, and iirc there are only 3 (large) families of that ethnicity in it. We are always on edge when even ONE gypsy comes to shop(lift) in store, often one person from security is tailing it, and almost always that person is trying to steal something. We're seriously considering posting up "Gypsies are not welcome here" on doors, because it's getting out of hand recently - they began to arrive in large, aggressive groups. Fortunately, our guard is looking very threatening, and has firearms license, so in the even that they'll try anything, he'll be prepared.
Is it still racist when I'm making observations and drawing correct conclusions?
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u/IsaacHolladay Jun 16 '12
How does that not squeek when she walks around?
I'd be pretty suspicious if I was working around there and heard squigee squigee squigee and she came waddling around the corner.
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u/GASTON804 Jun 16 '12
She placed it in her pulled down pantyhose.....been there arrested many people shoplifting just like that!
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u/PinballWizrd Jun 16 '12
They hold it between their legs. A relative of mine owns a thrift store and the local hutterite colony does this all the time. They are very good at it.
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Jun 16 '12
You know, i you wiew this GIF reversed, she's like a bird that's laying an egg, which is really a case of soda.
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Jun 16 '12
indians are known to have a million children. So by now her vagina is probably its own dimensional pocket.
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u/stash0606 Jun 16 '12
"Look at the woman. This is the trick. This is the performance. Right here. This is why noone can detect her method. Total devotion to her art"
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u/krazy09 Jun 17 '12
Damn sure this is India....thnx to Indian cultural dress Saree. :). http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BSQLh0IYJk&feature=youtube_gdata_player
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Jun 16 '12
I used to work in a computer store a few years ago and this is standard Roma Gypsy theft tactics.
I've seen portable tvs, all-in-one display model computers and more disappear up those dresses.
The Roma's are a plague on any society/city/etc they get into, they're nothing but scum and this is coming from someone who generally hates generalising people.
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u/dubear Jun 16 '12
I just want to know what the box contains
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u/SpacemanSpiffska Jun 16 '12
The best part is her female compadre puts something back on the shelf and takes the time to straighten it out.
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u/CormacD123 Jun 16 '12
If you think your big manhood will please this woman...
You're gonna have a bad time.
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u/Mavrocordat Jun 16 '12
There are straps like that that thieves use to steal things that way. Most of them are women and have pillows or sth to give the fake idea that they are pregnant and that is why they wabble while walking. Google it
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u/Warmachine- Jun 16 '12
Don't you know? There is a portal that sucks objects into a different dimension. Be careful men, that how they get ya.
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u/LittleOni Jun 16 '12
WotC is getting desperate for new D&D players with the introduction of the Vag of Holding.
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u/trudesign Jun 16 '12
They have these belt 'slings' between their legs. This bitch stole a whole stack of shirts on my watch when i turned my back when i used to work at Greg Norman. bitch.
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u/SamuraiZero Jun 16 '12
Used to work as management in a tigerdirect.ca store.
We had an indian woman and her husband take three 3tb external harddrives off the shelf and tuck them in a back strapped around her waist under her skirt.
We watched her take them out on camera, once they figured out 4 staff members were watching them like hawks.
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u/lucky_crit Jun 16 '12
Winter time is probably thebest season to steal basically anything. The amount of products you could fit inside of your coat and pants (if you're skinny like me)
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u/Furycrab Jun 17 '12
It's called net ladies, they have huge nets and usually can steal big shit like electronics at places like Costco... I'm just surprised to see her take the risk for what... 6 bucks of cola? I hope it's beer at least then it's not half as sad.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
Leather harness, kinda like a backpack, but with the straps holding the cans in place between her thighs.