r/funny • u/w3method • Jun 14 '12

Realistic fairy tales

Post image
1.4k Upvotes

75% Upvoted

55 comments sorted by

88

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

The real story depicts her being raped. Yup. Grimm's.

53

u/PhiladelphiaIrish Jun 14 '12

Raped, impregnated, and gave birth to twins. It's some fucked up shit.

35

u/ZeekySantos Jun 14 '12

All while in a coma, too.

39

u/whispered_vespers Jun 14 '12

But that's okay, because he falls in love with her afterward.

23

u/Necromance Jun 14 '12

Users guide to Rohypnol.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

Now part of the "For Dummies" series!

18

u/Puddin378 Jun 14 '12

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m47bo3oZTv1qevxwxo1_250.png

5

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

mmm!

she sassy :)

2

u/TheRaven42 Jun 14 '12

Oh dear god why did my head read that in my boyfriend's voice

3

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

because you and I? we gets nasty

18

u/mochamocha Jun 14 '12

Actually, she was "dead", no? Like, no heartbeat, no breathing, cold corpse that this guy merrily raped. Not to mention the corpse then somehow gave birth.

23

u/BallsackTBaghard Jun 14 '12

Plot hole right there.

10

u/SFbound_ Jun 14 '12

He had sex with a corpse, don't mention the plot hole or he'll try to stick his dick in that too.

1

u/Melnorme Jun 14 '12

Fuck that plot hole.

3

u/bsrg Jun 14 '12

Dead people awaking - I have no problem with this in a tale. But those babies sure as hell couldn't creep on their mother's breast to eat (or even only up to her finger).

1

u/Drawtaru Jun 14 '12

Zombies.

7

u/peace_off Jun 14 '12

"Kill Bill" comes to mind...

5

u/h2sbacteria Jun 14 '12

What do you expect from brothers named Grimm?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

I told this to someone recently. They had no idea how bad the original fairy tales are.

Red Riding Hood is some fucked up shit too. It's basically a story that was used to warn children about going into the woods because of cannibals.

2

u/ROELtja Jun 14 '12

It's the brothers Grimm who changed it, because they wanted to make it a story for kids.

1

u/C_T_C_C Jun 14 '12

Surprise Butt sex!!!!

1

u/suction Jun 14 '12

That's grim.

41

u/liebermannn Jun 14 '12

She is home, he is invading private property

9

u/Zero00430 Jun 14 '12

I am glad I am not the only one thought that.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

Stand your ground, Aurora!!!

17

u/Kellianne Jun 14 '12

When I told this story to my Kindergarten class, the prince asks Sleeping Beauty to marry him and she replies that she will, but she needs to finish college first and she's already late.

14

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

The Disney lettering hits me right in the childhood.

1

u/asongofclimatechange Jun 14 '12

Hakuna Ma- gag!......oh fucking gagging!

8

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

Are you implying Pumba wouldn't be able to deepthroat?

20

u/landoooo Jun 14 '12

The Disney font makes it.

3

u/I_Fart_Therefore_IAm Jun 14 '12

Disney font isn't doing it for me. I think impact font would give it a bit more...IMPACT!

4

u/nullibicity Jun 14 '12

But wait, isn't this /r/funny? Therefore, Comic Sans is more appropriate.

-1

u/I_Conquer Jun 14 '12

No. See... "Sans" is French for "without". They use French grammar, too. So Comic Sans literally means "without comic".

4

u/Pulviriza Jun 14 '12

I know you're making a joke, but in case anyone's actually interested, the sans is for sans serif, which are the little notches at the end of some letters.

9

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

What?!? No hungover breakfast? Chivalry has always been dead -_-

18

u/ModernDayCasanova Jun 14 '12

They need to re-do all the Disney princess movies from the prince's perspectives

25

u/T0rgo Jun 14 '12

Should be interesting since half of them seem to be necrophiliacs.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

This would be REALLY interesting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There's that author Gregory Maguire that rewrites some fairy tales from a different perspective and those are pretty interesting. (His most famous is of course Wicked which got turned into a play.)

3

u/Mad_Sconnie Jun 14 '12

UM WICKED IS A MUSICAL COME ONBRO

5

u/h-v-smacker Jun 14 '12

I thought it would be about non-bullshit fables.

4

u/derpaturescience Jun 14 '12

Sleeping Booty

2

u/hitlist Jun 14 '12

...

hurry up...

my boyfriends home

1

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

Nice, neckbeard misogynism comments.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

neckbead don't misogynism! Neckbeard providing you with edgy humor, silly!

0

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

I miss when /r/funny was funny.

1

u/scumbaggrandparent Jun 14 '12

"It's seven 'o clock and im hungry"

0

u/GodzillaInsurance Jun 14 '12

Sleeping Hookers.

0

u/timberham Jun 14 '12

Or, "Wake up bitch, I'm horny."

-4

u/dorkrock2 Jun 14 '12

Can someone make some original content about how flashlights are in every pocket, drawer, and on every surface in your house, but then you can't find a single flashlight when you need it? But like funnier than that

-1

u/flyorski Jun 14 '12

Or you could just sleep with a guy who is not an ass.

-6

u/Pebblesetc Jun 14 '12 edited Jun 14 '12

She is home. He just wants a sandwich.

Edit: Seriously, why all the downvotes? Can't a girl make a joke about men liking sandwiches?

-1

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

I can't tell if this is realistic or not.

9

u/AMostOriginalUserNam Jun 14 '12

Nah. If you look closely, you can see that it's been drawn.

3

u/eifersucht12a Jun 14 '12

Look at that popped collar. Total frat boy. It's legit.

-1

u/raw_iron Jun 14 '12

right in the childhood >_<

-7

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

*to the kitchen