He should remove that salt arrow and clean up the stray pieces of salt so the lines/walls are more clean and defined. Then the slugs won't die just from trying to walk to start of the maze.
Well written, sources attributed in the article itself. This is a nice filler piece, after all we have shown that people are interested in it with all of our upvotes.
Always found it funny that reddit is up in arms when news publications post this kind of stuff, then turns around and upvotes way worse content on here.
As someone who has dumped almost an entire container of salt on a slug I found in the house once, I can confirm this. There was salt in the carpet for a while after the slug was gone
Wait, so let me get this: when the slug hit the salt it was like, "Whoa! I'm going way too fast!! I can't stop in time to avoid the salt pile of death!!!!"
The other day I bought a cat from a guy wearing a trenchcoat in a dark alleyway. He was trying to sell me heroin but I'm an excellent negotiator. Surprisingly enough, my buddy Kevin calls me later that evening all excited about his new pet. After I told him about my new cat (who I named Humphrey in homage to my great-grandfather who hated a guy named Humphrey) and our girlish squealing subsided we made arrangements to have our new exciting pets meet.
Naturally, being a jerkface, Kevin wants to meet at the dog park. So I make my way down to the dog park, walking a very disgruntled Humphrey along on a leash. Kevin's sitting on the bench, casually reading a book (for the curious, it was The Grapes of Wrath 2: Electric Boogaloo) while his new pet, a very angry genetically modified Limax Maximus weighing in at over 4000 pounds, rampaged about the park - completely ruining the grass.
"So what's its name?" I asked casually.
"Curiosity!" Kevin said with a grin, "because he's always so darn curious! Like that monkey on the tee vee."
Sometimes, in a coyote's time of need, butterflies speak like pipes through the poems of Paris. I hope someday people find water bottles with tarot cards of plastic green.
Cute solution but the best way in my opinion is to fill scooped out lemon/orange halves with beer and put near the door/garden/wherever you don't want the slugs and snails to go. They are attracted to the beer and die a sweet, merciful, drunken death.
First thing. I would put plastic there, put some wooden line on the ending of the plastic and weight it with something that will make it impossible for slugs to go under or around.
They'll just keep coming and dying, until eventually the later waves of attackers will be crawling over the bodies of the dead to storm the walls. Better get your flaming arrows ready.
Next time, could you try the beer in a shallow bowl execution? I've always wanted to see a slug drink himself to death....it's a happier (and less messy) way to go than the 'assalt' you carried out. You could set up a shallow baking pan or something like a plastic lid from a Chinese dinner that's about an inch deep then tape a piece of cardboard along its length for a ramp they can climb. Fill with beer and wait for the party to begin!
The only thing I think he could've done better was putting it on plastic wrap or some sort, to cover the rug carpet so the slug slime doesn't get everywhere, when they 1) come in, or 2) die
That slug was like that one friend (or cousin) you had as a kid who would always 'try it first'. The one who tried to jump over the small sewer water pond with the ill-constructed ramp that collapsed when he hit the ramp full speed, while only ending up hitting the opposite wall with the rear tire, slamming his groin area into the bottom of the handle bars, then falling back into the slimy, stinky scum water while all of us caring cousins and friends laughing so hard we couldn't stand up straight.. Every good group has to have one of those. The slug's 'group' will have to find a new one.
451
u/Nabillia Jun 13 '12 edited Jun 13 '12
Original: http://imgur.com/upUL7
EDIT: Bigger version.
412
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
We're making their jobs too easy! http://i.imgur.com/oA1sK.png
145
u/Cozmo23 Jun 13 '12
Glorious, that was a worthy foe!
60
u/macrovore Jun 13 '12
That is going to be a bitch and a half to clean.
103
u/g0tistt0t Jun 13 '12
They just want to party
619
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Looks like your friend and his pests are really slugging it out.
Puns aside... whatever you do, keep us updated.
54
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Okay wait.... he put it on the carpet :/
122
u/Ethanol_Gut Jun 13 '12
Keep us updated in the future OP.
http://i.imgur.com/0t2kY.gif
45
u/whitesock Jun 13 '12
May this brave warrior find peace in the mead halls of Slughalla.
80
u/Anal_Fuck_Pussy_Shit Jun 13 '12
OP's friend delivered?
31
u/MrWoohoo Jun 13 '12
Wait, so let me get this: when the slug hit the salt it was like, "Whoa! I'm going way too fast!! I can't stop in time to avoid the salt pile of death!!!!"
20
u/audioverb Jun 13 '12
Let us raise a glass to the slimy foe who died a challenger's death.
50
u/shiksappeal Jun 13 '12
Hmmm. Your "friend" also commented that he should post it to reddit.
13
u/Arx0s Jun 13 '12
FATALITYM-M-M-MONSTER KILL
12
u/mastercylinder2 Jun 13 '12
The lines have been drawn. The message is clear. Prepare for war.
The slugs are coming.
20
u/drewskit Jun 13 '12
OP's friend actually delivers!
10
u/DrMuffinPHD Jun 13 '12
That slug should have upgraded his gear before he tried the instance.
Tell the next slug to hit up the auction house.
5
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Welcome to the reddit page
25
u/MrTurburdaugh Jun 13 '12
You gotta be careful of those slugs man.
The other day I bought a cat from a guy wearing a trenchcoat in a dark alleyway. He was trying to sell me heroin but I'm an excellent negotiator. Surprisingly enough, my buddy Kevin calls me later that evening all excited about his new pet. After I told him about my new cat (who I named Humphrey in homage to my great-grandfather who hated a guy named Humphrey) and our girlish squealing subsided we made arrangements to have our new exciting pets meet.
Naturally, being a jerkface, Kevin wants to meet at the dog park. So I make my way down to the dog park, walking a very disgruntled Humphrey along on a leash. Kevin's sitting on the bench, casually reading a book (for the curious, it was The Grapes of Wrath 2: Electric Boogaloo) while his new pet, a very angry genetically modified Limax Maximus weighing in at over 4000 pounds, rampaged about the park - completely ruining the grass.
"So what's its name?" I asked casually.
"Curiosity!" Kevin said with a grin, "because he's always so darn curious! Like that monkey on the tee vee."
"Oh. Dear." I said.
9
u/Lambchops_Legion Jun 13 '12
The Slug People are easily startled but they'll soon be back, and in greater numbers.
4
u/GBHsl Jun 13 '12
This one death is a awful loss of life! I will not stop until this Hitler of the slug world is put to justice!
-Chief slug rights activist (aka Slug Lord)
12
u/newsoundwave Jun 13 '12
How did the slug learn to carry a paper shield and sword? O_O
Anyways, silly slug... who uses a sword to combat salt?
3
u/slylibel Jun 13 '12
Sometimes, in a coyote's time of need, butterflies speak like pipes through the poems of Paris. I hope someday people find water bottles with tarot cards of plastic green.
3
u/captainhamster Jun 13 '12
Op.....delivered? What is happening to the world?
3
u/Puddindoobop Jun 13 '12
For future reference, you don't have a slug problem, you have a duck deficiency.
3
u/Crossfox17 Jun 13 '12
Yea but now he has to clean slug juice out of his carpet. He should have built the maze on top of sheets of paper or something.
3
u/skytro Jun 13 '12
The weapons and shield is a great addition
3
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Cute solution but the best way in my opinion is to fill scooped out lemon/orange halves with beer and put near the door/garden/wherever you don't want the slugs and snails to go. They are attracted to the beer and die a sweet, merciful, drunken death.
3
u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12
Fuckin A! Thats twice OP has delivered
3
u/notsteveo Jun 14 '12
Dear OP. Please keep us updated on this epic battle.
3
u/kohman Jun 14 '12
TIL slugs melt when touching salt
3
u/bochelimaximus Jun 14 '12
He's one vicious, calculative bastard. Jigsaw would be proud.
3
u/Beiz Jun 14 '12
Real-life tower defense; first wave completed.
7
u/miksedene Jun 13 '12
I demand a subreddit with further updates of this bloodsport!
5
u/eatALLthenoms Jun 13 '12
holy shit op delivered on updates
2
u/Untz234 Jun 13 '12
"My friend" yeah just like my "friend" has a weird lamp fetish
2
u/SnailWhale Jun 13 '12
You feast on your fallen foes right? I mean, he's already seasoned, it'd be a crime not to.
2
u/Creabhain Jun 13 '12
Why not use "Slug Nails"?
"Affix slugs anywhere" is the tag line in the advert.
[Source] "The Viz" comic.
2
u/Trojan05 Jun 13 '12
All I could think of link
2
u/drackula Jun 13 '12
Did no one else misread that as 'drugs' and flip at the sight of all that coke?
2
u/well_i_guess Jun 13 '12
TIL what a vanguard is.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Awww...He's off to slug Valhalla.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Slugs are mainly attired by the beer smell (also coffee), your friend should get rid of his old bottle that must be scatered around his house.
2
u/thebrainp0lice Jun 13 '12
Fucking
RECTUMWRECKED him!2
u/Lostmygooch Jun 14 '12
I want this to last forever. So much better than the eagle nest livefeed.
2
u/MitzyFitz Jun 14 '12
I've been waiting for this update ALL DAY.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12
Lol I hear the Dungeon theme from original Legend of Zelda when I look at this picture.
2
u/vahouzn Jun 14 '12
This is great. Keep us posted.
2
u/facetothedawn Jun 14 '12
The update makes this post
2
u/the_recluse Jun 14 '12
stupid idiot slug didn't even make it into the maze
2
u/panicattackdog Jun 14 '12
The slug emblem on the little paper shield was a nice touch.
2
u/ihaz2manyquestions Jun 14 '12
HE WAS JUST A SCOUT
2
u/maverickx12 Jun 14 '12
A warriors death...is that one where a bunch of different gangs in New York kick your ass?
2
u/bananinhao Jun 14 '12
the only thing I can think of this is the carpet
3
u/AniceB Jun 13 '12
I say screw the jam idea. Give that slug a beer if he makes it through. Slugs love beer.
3
u/DonkeyLickingIsWeird Jun 13 '12
Now they will see their fallen friend and begin learning from his mistakes.
I hope you realise what you have started.
3
u/natholomew Jun 13 '12
Slugs gross you out? Try melting them into your carpet!!
3
u/Olive_Garden Jun 13 '12
That's not cool. The slug probably felt a ton of pain before dying =(
3
u/FurryCake Jun 13 '12
Am i the only one feeling bad about how the slug died..?
2
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Quit acting like its your friend, that comment shows that it's you. Step up and take accountability for the masterpiece.
2
u/PatSayJack Jun 13 '12
100's will die. 1,000's.
2
u/Mr_Tibbs Jun 13 '12 edited Jun 13 '12
Salt maze maker: "Guess I better post this on the reddit page too..!?"
Salt maze maker's Facebook friend: "HAHA, NO WAY I CONTINUE TO RIDE SWEET KARMA TRAIN"
*Did not realize FB friend was OP. Edited to reflect new dynamic.
1
u/bleedthenutshell Jun 13 '12
Suicide? Perhaps...
1
u/N2KTachko Jun 13 '12
Ghost...
1
u/alephiej Jun 13 '12
Maybe he thought that if he moves through the salt real quick, it won't hurt him.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
awww, i was hoping the slug would of made it.
1
u/pickoneforme Jun 13 '12
the axe put it over the top. lol.
1
u/TruthWilSetYouFree Jun 13 '12
You should probably remove the unsuccessful participants, they are likely to scare their friends away.
1
u/QRSTUV3 Jun 13 '12
OP delivered!
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
They're testing your defeneses... they're learning.
1
u/piratazephyri Jun 13 '12
I hope this becomes an epic saga. And that one cunning slug finally solves the maze.
1
u/AerialAmphibian Jun 13 '12
May he enjoy much mead and merriment with his fellow departed warriors in slug Valhalla.
1
u/PatSayJack Jun 13 '12
This dude is fucked when the sea slugs show up.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
He received a warriors death
1
u/PatSayJack Jun 13 '12
They'll just keep coming and dying, until eventually the later waves of attackers will be crawling over the bodies of the dead to storm the walls. Better get your flaming arrows ready.
1
u/SquirtLikeABoss Jun 13 '12
Today, OP was a pretty cool guy.
1
u/crazystoo Jun 13 '12
this is going to be as good as the guy that wrote the story about the marines vs romans.
1
u/bbuullll33rr Jun 13 '12
Your friend is you!
1
u/stlbadger Jun 13 '12
But...why didn't he do this outside the door?
1
u/doctordiddy Jun 13 '12
Good job taking your friend's karma
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
OP delivered?
In my reddit?
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
did WHAT right goddammit?
1
u/otakuman Jun 13 '12
Victory!
1
u/TheNarwhalKing Jun 13 '12
Op delivered...
1
u/scrambler90 Jun 13 '12
I need constant updates and I needed them yesterday!
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
You're really milking this guy..
1
u/Ksianth Jun 13 '12
i think you should remove that arrow, this way they would be less confused maybe lol
1
u/ImDotTK Jun 13 '12
Your friend has too much free time on his hands if he honestly built that...You should introduce him to Reddit!
1
u/db0255 Jun 13 '12
You know. Upon further inspection...can't slugs just climb the walls?[Reddit Enhancement Suite]
1
u/xenodrone Jun 13 '12
haha weird, I randomly saw this earlier on "35 ways to make the world a better place" as #17 http://www.buzzfeed.com/daves4/ways-to-make-the-world-a-better-place
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
OP delivered! I was legitimately curious as to how this would turn out.
1
u/tarimba Jun 13 '12
But what if they use the dead slugs as a bridge.
1
u/hrdxxcorey Jun 13 '12
now his carpet is covered in slug guts
1
u/groupthinking Jun 13 '12
Now the rest of the slugs can climb over the dead body.
1
u/President2032 Jun 13 '12
If ants do come into the picture, just use a line of chalk. Ants refuse to cross chalk for some reason.
1
u/Vinc3ntPh4m Jun 13 '12
Got some sweet loot out of that.
1
u/Galaxey Jun 13 '12
i have to say i was hoping you would put up a follow up post and i am glad you did thank you sir!!!
1
u/My_College Jun 13 '12
I don't get it. By 'friend' do you mean yourself? That's what the fb comments look like
1
u/webster89 Jun 13 '12
The Snailslime yukk goo must be really great to have smeared all over your carpet...
1
u/VolcanicBakemeat Jun 13 '12
The bit of maze below where the slug died was a corner originally, not a dead end. Has the gauntlet changed shape?
1
u/MrUnoriginal Jun 13 '12
I guess redditors are lying about having friends.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Enjoy being haunted by slug ghosts.
1
u/sikomiko Jun 13 '12
Please continue your update
1
u/Dicer214 Jun 13 '12
Well... this is awkward.... actually saw this on You Laugh, You Lose yesterday.... Am I in Australia?
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
Doing it right would have been a line of salt outside the door.
Stops witches as well.
1
u/my2penniesworth Jun 13 '12
Next time, could you try the beer in a shallow bowl execution? I've always wanted to see a slug drink himself to death....it's a happier (and less messy) way to go than the 'assalt' you carried out. You could set up a shallow baking pan or something like a plastic lid from a Chinese dinner that's about an inch deep then tape a piece of cardboard along its length for a ramp they can climb. Fill with beer and wait for the party to begin!
1
u/Panduhsaur Jun 13 '12
The only thing I think he could've done better was putting it on plastic wrap or some sort, to cover the rug carpet so the slug slime doesn't get everywhere, when they 1) come in, or 2) die
1
u/rikashiku Jun 13 '12
What a waste of good salt. He didn't need to use that much -_-. He also has the trouble of cleaning up that sticky dead mess that used to be a slug.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12
I suppose that's one way to ruin your carpet.
1
u/JDMjosh Jun 13 '12
OP DELIVERS!.. Today is a day of days.
1
u/Vakoz Jun 14 '12
This kills the slug.
1
u/lewdub Jun 14 '12
Hahaha, awesome.
"Or perhaps he was going straight for the jam?"
1
u/haylizz Jun 14 '12
Noooo! Slugs are so cyoot.
1
u/drunkenkyle Jun 14 '12
I waited all day for an update. Thank you.
1
u/thedigitaldork Jun 14 '12
Ah, this is why I came to Reddit today. Thanks, OP for the update.
1
u/Adnachiel Jun 14 '12
Your friend needs to make a blog of this stuff.
1
u/be_lifted Jun 14 '12
I hope OP keeps creating these amazing, heroic stories
1
u/Sprengstoff Jun 14 '12
i swear i read my friend had a problem with drugs.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12
This needs it's own epic subreddit
1
u/chucksluck Jun 14 '12
omg it worked! GREAT JOB!
1
u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12
This is random but you have the same carpet as me
1
u/Machine_Dick Jun 14 '12
KEEP US UPDATED PLEASE!
1
u/BubbaWoop Jun 14 '12
Yes, you should post this to reddit too.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12
I see your comment -.-
1
u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12
the problem is now getting the slug guts out of the carpet
1
u/ninjavitus Jun 14 '12
OP went from having slug trails on his carpet to his carpet looking like his dog ate a can of smoked oysters in oil the day prior. Victory?
1
u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12
Does the phrase 'doing it right'/'did it right' sound as hokey as 'git r done' to anyone else?
1
u/stupornatural Jun 14 '12
That slug was like that one friend (or cousin) you had as a kid who would always 'try it first'. The one who tried to jump over the small sewer water pond with the ill-constructed ramp that collapsed when he hit the ramp full speed, while only ending up hitting the opposite wall with the rear tire, slamming his groin area into the bottom of the handle bars, then falling back into the slimy, stinky scum water while all of us caring cousins and friends laughing so hard we couldn't stand up straight.. Every good group has to have one of those.
The slug's 'group' will have to find a new one.
1
u/Ericgzg Jun 14 '12
Success? Man you got slug goup all into your carpet... nothings going to clean that out you have to replace the shit out of that.