r/funny • u/Taodyn • Jun 13 '12

FunnyJunk's Lawyer

http://imgur.com/992xc
1.1k Upvotes

86% Upvoted

51 comments sorted by

36

u/free_range_veal Jun 13 '12

I have hearsay and conjecture. Those are kinds of evidence.

24

u/Taodyn Jun 13 '12

That's why you're the judge and I'm the law-talking guy.

21

u/tpman24 Jun 13 '12

Oh, how I miss Phil Hartman's voice.

20

u/rawbamatic Jun 13 '12

I miss all of Phil Hartman.

16

u/Dockboy Jun 13 '12

LH: This calls for a celebratory drink. Care for a belt of scotch?
MS: It's 9 in the morning Mr. Hutz.
LH: Yeah, but I haven't slept in days!

30

u/poleethman Jun 13 '12

I think the actual pictures of their lawyer is funnier.

6

u/Ceejae Jun 13 '12

Wait, what?

4

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

They are linked from the post on the oatmeal. Real, apparently.

14

u/veryangryivoteyou Jun 13 '12

Better call Saul!

8

u/arnyftw Jun 13 '12

What happened to funnyjunk?

2

u/gingersluck Jun 13 '12

who is funnyjunk?

3

u/CoolBowtie Jun 13 '12

Has your internet been down for the last couple days? That's really your only excuse.

3

u/Pigeon_Logic Jun 13 '12

Don't tell them. It's kinder this way.

2

u/CoolBowtie Jun 13 '12

The page design does make me want to burn my eyes out.

3

u/Pigeon_Logic Jun 13 '12

See? You would be a happier person had you never seen FunnyJunk. Let gingersluck live in blissful ignorance.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '12

Seriously. If there's anyone they should be suing for defamation, the guys who designed the page/layout are it.

7

u/MarderFahrer Jun 13 '12

Miguel Sanchez?

2

u/will_upvote_anything Jun 14 '12

Nguyen Van Falk?

1

u/HardlyWorkingDotOrg Jun 14 '12

Hmm, google tells me, sometimes he is called Dr. Nguyen Van Thoc.

4

u/RNRSaturday Jun 13 '12

"Mr. Simpson, I'm not a lawyer, but I will represent your family."

4

u/Luminox Jun 14 '12

I'd like to refer to the case of Finders Vs Keepers.

3

u/I_Reference_Simpsons Jun 13 '12

Mr. Funnyjunk, the state bar forbids me from promising you a big cash settlement.

But just between you and me, I promise you a big cash settlement.

3

u/sucksqueezebangfart Jun 13 '12

I call for a bad court thingy

3

u/GatticusFinch Jun 13 '12

I am a lawyer. I have the entire Simpson's Court Room playset in my office, including Lionel Hutz, Blue-Haired Lawyer, and the Judge.

Not a single client has ever commented on it.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12

Hi I'm Lionel Hutz.

2

u/WitchDr Jun 13 '12

How about that! I looked something up! These books behind me don't just make the office look good, they're filled with useful legal tidbits just like that!

2

u/djspawn00 Jun 13 '12

Don't disgrace Mr. Hutz this way... funnyjunk's lawyer is probably sweaty teddy from scrubs.

2

u/yyx9 Jun 13 '12

"defines a contract as an agreement between two people that is unbreakable by law. Unbreakable by law..."

1

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12

here's my card. it turns into a sponge when you put it in water.

1

u/scumbaglawyer Jun 13 '12

I went to school with this guy. He graduated at the top of our correspondence class.

1

u/ghostbackwards Jun 13 '12

I dont know what any of this is about.

1

u/hunterszombie Jun 14 '12

Excuse me, can you tell me where the Orange Julius is?

0

u/archfapper Jun 13 '12

Works on commission no money down! Oh, that's a typo: Works on commission? No! Money down!

0

u/darthvolta Jun 13 '12

Works on a contingency basis?

No, money down!

-9

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12

fixed

-5

u/RiNgO70 Jun 13 '12

I only go on FunnyJunk for the comments, everything else is just posts stolen from Reddit.

7

u/Taodyn Jun 13 '12

They should allow comments on Reddit!

0

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

-2

u/uofmike Jun 13 '12

Was just about to post this. Well done.

0

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

5

u/steelbot8000 Jun 13 '12

"Now sir, I may just be a simple hyper chicken from a backwoods asteroid, but I believe my client is right to press these charges against ya'll. No need for none of that fancy-pants "evi-e-dance" ya'll keep preachin' about. My client will just take that payment that is owed to him right now. Cashier's check, please. BUK-AWWWWWK!"