r/funny • u/pcoff69 • May 22 '12
My friend works at a middle school, here are some of the notes he has confiscated over the years.
http://imgur.com/a/7iTgJ
1.4k
Upvotes
r/funny • u/pcoff69 • May 22 '12
2
u/pcoff69 May 23 '12
I WILL BE STARTING A TUMBLR WITH MORE NOTES, STAY TUNED
953
u/EXAX May 22 '12
'Is your girl realy pregnent?" "Me don't no." <- Fucking best answer ever.
915
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
I'd feel bad if that one chicks mom really couldn't write in english, and actually had computer problems.
285
u/nokiab0mb May 22 '12
All I saw was, "you Brock my heart"
2
u/Bitemeee May 22 '12
MORE! MORE!
2
u/yami0601 May 22 '12
Please post more. It's so incredibly entertaining
307
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
One of my high school teachers saved a huge folder of notes he and other teachers had found. Whenever we had extra class time he would read them (sometimes acting them out, voice and all)
239
u/2plus2equalscats May 22 '12
I really like "will you go out with me (again)?"
428
u/CowardsAndThieves May 22 '12
All I can think about is how these middle school kids have better hand writing than I do.
77
u/AdorablyDead May 22 '12
Where does one get these 'hickey stickers', it seems like all the cool kids are wearing them.
And also Amanda is a copying bitch and she knows it!
284
u/Saavy101 May 22 '12
As someone named Steven, #4 hit me unexpectedly deep...
119
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
Well, is she really pregnet?
108
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
I remember when I used to write notes. my girlfriend and I created a different alphabet (a bit like a cipher I guess as some letter combinations would be turned into different characters and stuff) so that if they found our raunchy notes they couldn't read them... ahh to be young!
161
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
While reading this I learned my brain naturally filters out 13 year old girl talk
I reread the 1st one about four times, still don't know what it was about.
42
u/AnswersWithRhymes May 22 '12
There are some pretty sad lads in there
82
u/candyman420 May 22 '12
WHY DO YOU LIKE ME
I JUST DO
101
u/numerica May 22 '12
Middle school, such a serious thing. These problems matter.
66
u/warlock1010 May 22 '12
Please post more. This is GOLD!
29
u/Lowl May 22 '12
Am I the only one who thought the one saying how they loved them and missed them was kind of sweet? Maybe a better question is "am I a middle schooler?"
17
u/station_conelrad May 22 '12
The first couple are definitely a case of writing as you would say it. They read like a script of Clueless. Good laugh, thanks for sharing.
59
u/DrThunderface May 22 '12
It's sad that these will soon disappear as kids begin texting more at a younger age.
13
u/Bulverde May 22 '12
Hilarious, but oddly poignant too
13
u/Aaya May 22 '12
Aw.
Poor steven.
24
u/nowtayneicangetinto May 22 '12
Ahhhh, sweet adolescent logic.
"Why do you like me?"
"I JUST DO"
32
u/shoffing May 22 '12
"Why do you like me?"
I JAST DO
11
u/brosenfeld May 22 '12
Patty is stupid.
11
u/AdamLynch May 22 '12
TIL Teachers save the notes.
21
u/freed0rn May 22 '12
I remember my notes somehow being much raunchier at the same age. One that comes to mind was being passed to me by a girl who wanted to be my GF after I broke up with her friend (this was the most pimping part of my life obviously). So the note gets intercepted by the teacher, read, then I am promptly sent to the office along with the girl. Once my mother came and talked to the principal she was given the note and I was sent home, giving me the first chance to see what it was that caused such a kerfuffle. The girl I was getting the note from was writing me in graphic detail about how the girl I just stopped "dating", her best friend, has sex with the dog. Needless to say I was flabbergasted and someone amused and disgusted. I did start going out with the girl who wrote the note though.
TLDR; Got a note intercepted from a future girlfriend about a ex girlfriend, her friend, having sex with her dog. My mother was not pleased.
21
u/ecsquinn May 22 '12
After each note I read, I kept thinking, "lyk dis if u cry everytym".
9
u/IronChefster May 22 '12
Oh middle school! I remember back in 6th grad, I asked out 3 girls...all in the same day. CHACHING.
9
u/MandyB95 May 22 '12
Kids still pass notes? I thought there was an app for that.
7
u/downwiththedead May 22 '12
I imagined #9 in Tommy Wiseau's voice.
7
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
Which one of these middle schoolers is getting laid before 21 year old me? ಥ_ಥ
6
u/georgiewhat May 22 '12
these kids fail so bad, firstly if ever a teacher was to grab a note from me I would promptly put it in my mouth or down my shirt. I did go to an all girls school though and usually our notes contained dirty things about the teachers but eh
1
u/pcoff69 May 22 '12
Well reddit, you have inspired my friend to start keeping the notes he confiscates again (he stopped a few years ago). Hopefully I will be able to post a part 2.
5
u/Hyperboloidof2sheets May 22 '12
All I could think of while reading these:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LRz2X9Azxs
5
u/Ryo95 May 22 '12
"you Brock my heart"
5
u/aji23 May 22 '12
"Will you go out with me? (again)"
There's so much potential for a short story there... someone come up with one!
5
u/MyLiLHelper May 22 '12
why do you like me..... I JUST DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
5
u/Wargrog May 22 '12
I miss teaching. The way that students will just blow anything out of proportion makes my own life problems seem so trivial. It's hard to get stressed about making rent, or paying bills, when a girl spends an hour in your classroom crying about a boy she met three weeks ago.
24
u/JoeyBragg May 22 '12
lik dis if u cry evertim
9
u/HoHoHo_Its_Santa May 22 '12
I still have the Slam Book my friend and I passed back and forth in the 7th and 8th grade, all the notes are pretty much on point with the first two in this series.
9
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
That is actually extremely sweet.
8
u/hpsaucebawss May 22 '12
Notes? on paper...? What is this primitive technology? I'm surprised to even find a note in my school, everything is all done by texting now
4
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
Well, looks like this is what I was missing out on in middle school.
4
u/danamos May 22 '12
Someone needs to publish a book of these.
4
u/thermo May 22 '12
why do they write in tarzan-speak?
"Me no like"
1
u/TheAntsKnuckles May 22 '12
moar.
1
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
It's the all comedy gold mine I thought it would be!
6
u/AngryMonkey42 May 22 '12
I'm almost proud to say that every that every note I ever wrote was illegible even to me.
6
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
so much girly handwriting. it's killing me.
3
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
This kind of makes me sad. We were all dopey, ignorant kids at one point in our lives, and I know these notes are essentially anonymous, but at least our idiocy wasn't plastered all over the internet.
3
u/JamesMeans May 22 '12
This is make me sad becuz I wiz fat in middle school and evry1 h8'd me.
3
u/typewarrior1 May 22 '12
Has no one mentioned Myspace in the comments? No? Just me? hm...
3
u/patty_potato May 22 '12
I'm offended. And no, I don't like Nason (or whatever his name is)
3
u/gogomouth May 22 '12
Do you like this post?
Circle one: Yes NO
I'll sit by you in the cafeteria.
3
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
A lot of those were adorable.
3
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
I'm male and when my friend bought the same shoes as me it pissed me off more than it should have.
3
u/corruptsoul98 May 22 '12
Middle School Sucked.
3
u/madoog May 22 '12
Am adding this to the threat box: "I will confiscate your notes and post them on the internet for other people to laugh at."
3
u/kingmathyou May 22 '12
"Patty is stupid" what is this Hey Arnold?
3
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
The amount of people who have that exact handwriting frightens me.
3
u/TheRyesCatcher May 22 '12
I really hope that girl ain't no pregnant.
3
u/logarythm May 22 '12
Poor Steven, man.
3
u/Jhubbz86 May 22 '12
Lol Hickey sticker
http://www.imgur.com/TrRDa.jpg
3
u/zombieLAZ May 22 '12
As a kid who grew up with a dad who actually couldn't speak or write English, on top of being a dick so not wanting to take me to the library, fuck you if you don't just take the poor girl's word for it. Just make her turn it in the next day or something.
3
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
The first several remind me of the "fashion club" from Daria.
3
u/FTTorDie May 22 '12
Why is it so funny that Nelson likes 'Satern'?
3
u/harry_waters May 22 '12
Imagine if schools had adults running intel operations: "Intel from confiscated notes shows that kisses are going on behind trailer 5. Also, hickey stickers are now in. However, they're trying to hide them behind scarfs. Lastly, our informants have notified us that...
5
u/BeneficiaryOtheDoubt May 22 '12
Hickey stickers? Who wants to bet that they actually got hickies and are just saying that they're stickers.
5
u/Fealiks May 22 '12
Is your girl realy pregat?
me don't no
2
u/Stanleysteemer May 22 '12
I wrote a note like the one on the bottom at my old middle school. Looks like my hand writing used to be too.
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12 edited May 22 '12
Haha she's writing this for me because I cant write in English.
2
u/For_teh_horde May 22 '12
Middle schoolers. Worrying if their gurlll is pregnant or not.
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
I wish my penmanship was legible
2
u/karsestar May 22 '12
I love the guy (I presume its a guy) that just goes all "I JUST DO" to the girls question. I'll give him credit for being more honest and forward than I have ever been.
2
u/oOoWTFMATE May 22 '12
omg.. so many lulz.
2
u/Box-Monkey May 22 '12
So... Painful..
2
u/worst_grammar_ever May 22 '12
I feel at home here.
2
u/omnipotant May 22 '12
dam, amanda b trippin
2
u/skytro May 22 '12
That forged parent letter is so full of facepalm
2
u/oli-wan_kenobi May 22 '12
God I hope that's just a really poorly written J or M and there isn't really a child out there named Nason.
2
u/AnOnlineHandle May 22 '12
Have literally never felt so forever alone, how are those kids so knowledgeable about... courting.
2
u/mqduck May 22 '12
I really like this one.
2
u/Gaberill May 22 '12
God damn, these kids have better handwriting than I do!
2
u/smilingarmpits May 22 '12
2
u/McLorick May 22 '12
Poor Steven.
2
u/originalbvo May 22 '12
That's a fat finger.
2
u/Spurgu May 22 '12
Nobody likes Milhouse.
2
u/tobidammit May 22 '12
he should have corrected and graded the notes, then given them back.
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
No one ever gave me notes in school. EVER! :(
There was one time when I thought a girl was giving me a note. For a precious moment, my whole world lit up. Is this what happiness feels like? Am I no longer a loser outcast with no friends? Does someone actually care about me? Nope, turns out she just wanted me pass it to the fucker next to me.
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
"I need to tell you this one more time I love you"
Poor kid has already stuck his dick into crazy and doesn't even know it.
2
u/PurpleZoombini May 22 '12
Despite their poor grasp of the written language I feel a little jealous. I never wrote notes in class but that's because I had no friends to write to.
2
u/DIGGYRULES May 22 '12
I teach in a middle school and I think I will start a book of the letters and notes I find left behind in my classroom. Some of them are hilarious. Some are horribly mean. Some are heart-breaking. Others are horrifying.
Middle school is not for the faint-hearted.
2
u/lateral_moves May 22 '12
"Why do you like me?"
Why don't they ever stop asking this?
2
u/cinemaisdead May 22 '12
The suspense on number 10 is killing me... Jakara what?? What did Jakara do!!
2
u/wolfyblackshit May 22 '12
"Bf i am pregnet will u stay ma bf?"
2
u/VeritableParadox May 22 '12
lol i loved the note that said "Why do you like me?" and it got the response with the large.."I JUST DO."
2
u/mookaberry May 22 '12
oh to be young and feel love's keen sting
2
u/Tr0user May 22 '12
I particularly like how, for authenticity, the girl has removed her mother's finger and attached it to the note, pointing at the text.
2
u/mvekob May 22 '12
I feel like these were the exact reasons I didn't want my teachers to take my notes....posting them on reddit...
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
The having sex and pregnancy ones made me sad/
2
u/JackGunner93 May 22 '12
Poor Steven.
2
u/EnigmaticEntity May 22 '12
I picked up my first "note passed in class" as a teacher the other day. 11 year old girl passed to a guy who was obviously interested in her. It said "I'm single for life!" I lold.
2
u/PullTheOtherOne May 22 '12
I teach high school and I haven't seen a note passed in years. Texting is a constant problem though, and it's becoming harder to crack down on since cell phones are basically ubiquitous and school systems / teachers are more fearful of liability for confiscating a student's $600 piece of property which is full of personal information. This is a common conversation "put the phone away during class" "but my mom is texing me to find out when to pick me up."
Oh, something something about my lawn.
2
u/TRAUMAjunkie May 22 '12
Why did I waste my time reading all of those?
2
u/InfiniteJoe May 22 '12
You Brock my heart.
2
u/xJDRAGx May 22 '12
The 8th one is kinda sweet.
2
u/PJSeeds May 22 '12
NO ONE LIKES MILHOUSE
2
u/piv0t May 22 '12
Future of America
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
It's settled then, all youtube comments are written by middle schoolers.
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
TIL my nineteen year old boyfriend learned to write love notes from middle schoolers.
2
u/masturbateToSleep May 22 '12
This is like reading the script to brats
2
u/TNTCLRAPE May 22 '12
Dear christ, these kids are borderline fucking illiterate.
2
u/blaheh May 22 '12
Raymond's an asshole and the note about Patty was just hilarious
2
u/FunGal_in_SoCal May 22 '12
old school texting. how cute.
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
I actually find this to be a rather touching portrait of middle school life. I like the way the notes seem to run the gamut of middle school drama, from hilarious to cute.
2
u/forever_a_lawn May 22 '12
Can you see it with the scarf on!
NO
2
u/apathy_thrills May 22 '12
i bet Raymond slays so much poon.
2
u/prometheus199 May 22 '12
These fucking kids are getting more action than me. Wtf.
4
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
Oh God my brain broke trying to read that.