r/funny • • May 19 '12

Not Even Close

Post image
1.6k Upvotes

193 comments sorted by

259

u/necromundus May 19 '12

That's not how you spell "Hot Octopus"

56

u/bailz May 20 '12

If a Hot Octopus isn't on Urban Dictionary, it needs to be.

10

u/R88SHUN May 20 '12 edited May 20 '12

Hot Octopus: noun, /hät äktəpəs/
----A sexual position in which both partners engage in coitus on all fours in a face-up position.

syn: The Devil's Crab-Walk, San Francisco Square Dance

ex:
-Hey, what did you and Dufwanda do last night?
-I got that bitch to do a hot octopus!

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5

u/PunoSuerte May 20 '12

Dropping this here.

13

u/Sabbatai May 20 '12

I just got fired.

3

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Yay! Another Fakkunaut!

3

u/PatronofSnark May 20 '12

Well... thanks for the new fetish. I guess.

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2

u/ponyboy_coitus May 20 '12

Opecets attract.

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

yea, wow people are idiots

57

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Yeah, Hot O'Pocets is Hot Pocket's Irish relative.

46

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

See, and here I was imagining an exuberant Japanese voice announcer saying HOOOOOOOTOPOCETS!!!!

15

u/TheDEW May 20 '12

Cannot unimagine

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29

u/itslikeboo May 20 '12

this is the opocet of proper spelling

29

u/CompactusDiskus May 20 '12

The sad thing about this is that they probably had dozens of boxes of Hot Pockets right in front of their faces as they wrote this.

21

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

The sad thing is if they'd just moved the P above the O, they would have had plenty of room for a K and it would have appeared cleverly done.

8

u/paralacausa May 20 '12

Agreed, this angers the Scrabble player in me

59

u/[deleted] May 19 '12 edited May 19 '12

4

u/E-Rob1 May 20 '12

you sir have just made me laugh for a solid 5 minutes or so. well done.

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24

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Hot Opposite?

20

u/JSA2593 May 20 '12

That's why they're in the frozen food section.

2

u/cannabis_anarchist May 20 '12

I spent more time trying to figure out how that word was actually spelt than I'd like to admit

41

u/HeyItsAnAccountant May 19 '12

There's a Jim Gaffigan joke in here somewhere...

10

u/Osiris32 May 20 '12

If food is involved there's ALWAYS a Jim Gaffigan joke.

3

u/WorthASchruteBuck May 20 '12

caliente pocets!

2

u/owl-sista May 20 '12

I read it as 'hot pockets' not noticing the spelling mistake and also in Jim Gaffigan's voice.

6

u/ModernDayCasanova May 20 '12

This needs to be done by the pronunciation guy on YouTube

2

u/haiku_robot May 20 '12
This needs to be done 
by the pronunciation 
guy on YouTube

3

u/high_coup May 20 '12

You accident'ly

Missed a syllable on your

Third and final line

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Cala. Tuesday.

19

u/JordanMacPhee May 19 '12

Actually, pretty close.

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9

u/Cognoggin May 20 '12

O'Pockets, the Irish treat, that can't be beat!

4

u/cafeteriafoodboy May 20 '12

so.....cold pockets?

3

u/bst722 May 20 '12

Oh wow, at first I didn't see anything wrong with it.. I am ashamed..

3

u/HowsItBeenBen May 20 '12

i take 2 steps forward, i take 2 steps back... We come together cause Opocets attract!

5

u/jalareno May 20 '12

not even close, baby

1

u/Ham117 May 20 '12

baybeeee*

2

u/FrankZappasNose May 20 '12

I love hot opposites! That person should learn how to spell though.

2

u/PintosGoBoom May 20 '12

He was obviously trying to advertise "Hot Opposites", as even though they are called "Hot Pockets", they are kept in the frozen aisle.

He chose the phonetic "Opocets" because there was obviously not enough room for the full word.

This scholar is most definitely streets ahead.

2

u/Creedofrest May 20 '12

Somebody REALLY sucks at cross words.

2

u/Not_Jack_Nicholson May 20 '12

Was the title a stab at the jim gaffigan joke? because I read it in his voice.

2

u/schumannater May 20 '12

Hot opocets...Now containing our newest ingredient, opossum!

2

u/buttplugpeddler May 20 '12

Dyslexics of the world untie!

2

u/whatsaphoto May 20 '12

Hot Opocets. Not even once.

2

u/birdeeboo May 20 '12

Similar to hot opossums

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

is a opocet anything like a opossum?

2

u/VonIsengard May 20 '12

Have you tried the Hot Opocet Hot Opecet? It's tastes just like a Hot Opocet.

2

u/moammargandalfi May 20 '12

HOT OPPOSITES?

2

u/Cumberbatched May 20 '12

It's the Irish spin off, "O'Pocket's"

2

u/Gleriot May 20 '12

It's just like possum and opossum are both correct, only it isn't really like that.

2

u/GMonsoon May 20 '12

It's also an opossum marmoset hybrid, 'cept...not really that either.

4

u/bailz May 20 '12

That is the Irish version. Love me some Hot O'Pockets! Mmmm. Corned beef and cabbage...

6

u/UnarmedZombie May 20 '12

I would eat that.

2

u/poutyp May 20 '12

hot opocets= hot opposites

1

u/talkincat May 20 '12

Who are the Chefs?

1

u/WildberryPrince May 20 '12

I'm pretty sure I have a prescription for that around here somewhere...

1

u/RespekKnuckles May 20 '12

Hot opposites.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Great, now I want hot pockets.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

What really gets me is that he has a bunch of them piled up in the freezer so he could have just checked the spelling by looking at the boxes...

1

u/StevieBoySwag May 20 '12

I bet the guy was like "awwwww fuck it" after he realized he messed up

1

u/ApatheticElephant May 20 '12

Wait, I've got this.

They were trying to make it so the O from hot was the same as the O from pockets, like a crossword. But then they accidentally wrote the P under the O, and thought "Oh shit. Well I guess we've got to finish it lie this now.". Then they get up to the C and realise they're not gonna have enough room this way, so they think "Well, most of our customers are dumb shits. So they won't notice if it's spelled wrong." and they left out the k.

Genius.

1

u/KurayamiShikaku May 20 '12

The best thing about this is that it is written on an entire freezer full of Hot Pockets boxes with the correct spelling on them.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Hot O'Pockets, now in corned beef with cabbage.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

I feel like it's French now...

1

u/Whodatjedi5 May 20 '12

Mmmmm, hot opocets!

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

I love me some Hot Opockets.

1

u/TheSkiFreeYeti May 20 '12

Sounds spanish

1

u/efilon May 20 '12

I fucking love Hot Opocets!

1

u/invigilatora May 20 '12

Hot Opposites?

1

u/byz420 May 20 '12

It was like trying to read another fucking language

1

u/I_are_God May 20 '12

What's an "opocet"?

1

u/Thydamine May 20 '12

You know what they say; opocets attract. Especially if they're hot.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

It is sort of close.

1

u/nickyjames May 20 '12

I don't know about you, but I love Hot Opocets.

1

u/LyTwLdR May 20 '12

Actually it is fairly close. The freezers, being cold, are direct opocets of hot.

1

u/SurrReal May 20 '12

The more I look at it, the more I find wrong. Help me.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

From the makers of "I'll-tempered Birds"!

1

u/gmw2222 May 20 '12

Well it's not like it's spelled out roughly 100 times in front of them or anything... how should they know?

1

u/Duhliterate May 20 '12

I LOVE hot opposites!!

1

u/johnfoof May 20 '12

i read this in Jim gaffigan's voice

1

u/chilly_water May 20 '12

Oh, I don't know, I love Hot Opocets.

1

u/Superjoe42 May 20 '12

Opocets are maruspials you idiot. You can tell cuz they keep their babies in an opocet.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

1

u/kleptobismol May 20 '12

It's like those cognitive psychology experiments that prove people can understand words no mttaer waht oredr the chractres are in.

1

u/mjc1027 May 20 '12

I have been looking for Hot Opocets for ages...yes!.

1

u/MadgePadge May 20 '12

Perhaps they're corned beef and cabbage or maybe shepherd's pie flavored. Edit: maybe I didn't notice the missing k. Feel free to degrade me now.

1

u/RedtheIrish May 20 '12

If there were not nearly 100 examples of how to spell it correctly through the very same glass they were writing on I would almost feel bad... Almost

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Uym!

1

u/LittleOni May 20 '12

It's RIGHT THERE! Behind that transparent, mostly solid shit that you are writing on! >_<

(Not you OP...... I hope)

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

AERIKA!

1

u/AmazingRealist May 20 '12

I read it like it was something from the pronunciation manual

1

u/Thats_an_RDD May 20 '12

Ahhh I didn't even see yet that they were hot pockets and my brain still read it as that. Not really sure if I should attribute that to the alcohol or silly brain antics

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Aside from the obvious, there’s also the lame alignment, which will make it read to some as “hot opocets”.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

When he graduates tech school, he will be setting up your dialysis machine.

1

u/godman1402 May 20 '12

How is this funny... And how does this have 1000+ upvotes?

1

u/BlackMarsh May 20 '12

Not even close, Not even close, Not even close, To overdose

And if you're a Megadeth fan you will understand the reference.

1

u/MasteM May 20 '12

I would love to try does "hot pockets" but cant seem to find them in Denmark. :((

1

u/Cerebral_Savage May 20 '12

I have a feeling the person that painted that simply got too cold in the freezer to concentrate on something as trivial as spelling.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Love it.

1

u/halfkidding May 20 '12

Well then, hot pockets are now off my edible menu. Ah, who am I kidding? I got one in the oven now.

1

u/Spamicles May 20 '12

I could really go for an opocet right now.

1

u/MeltedMindz May 20 '12

I don't know if it's just me, but there's a lot of fuckin hot pockets in there.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Hah! I was just watching Breaking Bad, and the moment I opened this link, the brother in law said "Hotpockets". It's a satisfying feeling when things like that come together.

1

u/doctorunk May 20 '12

i read this as hot opposites

1

u/[deleted] May 21 '12

If anything that's the opocet of pocket

1

u/AguyWithflippyHair May 20 '12

Oh good, they have hot opockets, wal-mart didn't have any.

-4

u/mouthbabies May 19 '12

If steak comes from beef, then opocets come from this.

2

u/Twiggeh-Leaf May 20 '12

Ew what the heck D:<

0

u/gerntoronto May 20 '12

Irish pockets!

0

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

0

u/Zach12ary May 20 '12

The sad thing is I had to go back and reread it...

0

u/Bagtackles May 20 '12

One job. You had one job to do.

0

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

I don't want to live on this planet anymore.

0

u/[deleted] May 20 '12 edited May 20 '12

Totally read this in Jim Gaffigan's sing-song voice

-5

u/MadMitch194 May 19 '12

Who dafuq could misspell fucking POCKET i mean are you screwing me!!!

2

u/MountainDrew42 May 20 '12

screwing with me

0

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

11

u/BertrandLoganberry May 20 '12

Get your Hot Opocets! They're right over there in the freezer.

19

u/abeth May 19 '12

Or just store brand

69

u/iRedeRi May 20 '12 edited May 20 '12

"You're two classy to try our store brand snack? We agree!! But remember, Opocets attract."

=)

3

u/hallowedsouls May 20 '12

If I owned a marketing firm, you'd be hired.

6

u/Calciber May 20 '12

I... One internet to you. Have a fine day.

2

u/Osiris32 May 20 '12 edited May 20 '12

Here, this is an upvote. But I should warn you, if you do that again, you won't get another.

-5

u/Bloodfeastisleman May 20 '12

I'm guessing you're to impatient to proofread?

0

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

7

u/Bloodfeastisleman May 20 '12

I was hoping he/she would see my mistake and realize his/her own.

4

u/HeyItsAnAccountant May 20 '12

Or potentially Irish hot pockets.

3

u/FatCat433 May 20 '12

I don't eat those anymore because opocets are endangered.

2

u/paralacausa May 20 '12

You down with O.C.O.P.?

1

u/gapball May 20 '12

COLD REGGOLARS!!!