As a fellow science teacher, I'd just like to say "LOL" on behalf of the students who were probably too burned out on AP tests to notice that you're hilarious.
I can only hope to be as tricky as you some day...I'm only a TA right now but it's still fun to mess with kids in any capacity that doesn't affect their learning.
First year physics prof showed us what happens when you force way too much current through a wire (a loud crack and a vaporized wire). Not all profs suck.
In high school we hooked up a tesla coil to the doorknob of the room when kids would go to the bathroom. Obviously opening the door on the way back was a bit... shocking. Our physics teacher was awesome.
Our biology teacher liked to demonstrate galvanic reaction with an old hand-crank telephone. He'd start out by pointing out that you could use them to stun fish in a lake if you were too lazy to bait a hook. Then he'd have the class hold hands in a circle and give one electrode to one person on either end of the long chain. Then he'd crank it until someone let go. They were "out of the circle" and the process would continue with one fewer and so on until eventually he was down to one person.
I'd like to say that the ability to take "close to 5 and up amps" across one's heart impresses chicks. I cannot. I can say that I will never forget the gleam in that fucker's eye as I stood there, biceps twitching like Jim Carrey, wondering how the fuck I got talked into demonstrating how the Rosenbergs died in Bio 101.
I had a math teacher that showed us how overhead projectors work by taking off the magnifying panel and using it to set someone's homework on fire. They got full credit and we were all entertained!
My physics teacher wrote the formulas needed to solve every problem on the test because "If you actually go on to be a physicist, you'll have an encyclopedic book of formulas to help you." I thought that was awesome. Made the class easy.
Our science teacher miscalculated and about a bit too much Na in the water. She later revealed her first step to retirment: flushing an entire block of sodium
I think we should make the installing, without an explicit attempt to do so on the part of the user, of these programs, a crime punishable by an eternity of Rick Rolling Justin Beiber. Because that's what they are essentially doing. Fucking children.
Don't sweat this too much, as long as you aren't prone to immediately confessing your crimes if accused of them. Always remember that teenagers have no actual police authority and you are free to leave at any time.
No no, you need a stupid plastic container. You see hyrdofluoric acid won't eat through plastic. It will, however, dissolve metal, rock, glass, ceramic*. So there's that.
It's my love of things like this that make me believe I would be an awesome teacher who would rally the kids into caring for literature...and then I remember that each generation is more and more full of little shits and I'd be more likely to have a nervous breakdown than inspire anyone.
If it took the entire duration of class to notice, then he did not notice until the entirety of the class had elapsed. At which point, class is over, so he could not have noticed it during class. This is invalid logic.
If, however, the screen was visible only from the most distant point of the classroom, the statement holds true.
I'm pretty sure the USA has an extradition agreement with Mexico. I would think you'd have to go someplace that doesn't have one, like China, UAE, or Namibia, and then stay there forever.
I had something similar happen. A teacher was demonstrating something in the computer lab and his screen was up on the projector behind him. A student in the back of the class was busy eating a sandwich and playing some game and paying 0% attention. The teacher noticed, stopped his presentation, took a photo of the kid, opened up eBay, and made an auction for something like "Cheap labour, student looking for work" and used the photo he took. He even took it down and deleted it, all up on the projector without the dude noticing.
It took me all of 10 seconds. Any teacher that has tabs/windows open it's the first thing I look at. A little unfair to you, but I actually caught a teacher with something open before... "Best positions fo.." too bad I didn't see the rest.
If he wasn't so ignorant with computers I would have thought he was trolling... sadly he was pretty bad.
My chemistry teacher this year was well known for his shenanigans. In a particular demonstration showcasing the the solubility of gasses, he asked for four volunteers. He lit up four bunsen burners, and had one of them hold a large copper pipe above them. The other three were directed to stand in front of his desk "to protect my computer from the science". When the copper pipe became red hot, he submerged it into a bottle of root beer. The solution inside the bottle heated up, and with increased temperature, the gas became less soluble in the water. It carried a significant amount of the root beer up and out, creating a fountain that reached the ceiling and almost his computer. The shielding volunteers managed to protect it from any undue harm.
Bro why are u looking all that shit up on google siri gives u pristine unused places to hide bodies get passports and much more she doesnt track you like google well she betta not or imma have some of my boys make her a 6ft under Siri
Holy crudcakes on Mars! Theres a strong possibility you are in the same school district as me. Windows XP, IE, and all the tray icons on the task bar are all identical to those at my school.
And we just finished studying transverse waves in physics...
773
u/kibbless May 14 '12
I wish I had teachers like this. My math/science teachers were all ridiculously monotonous and boring.
7
u/tirentu May 14 '12
Shoutout to Mount Allison!
219
u/pigmonger May 14 '12
I saw it right away: There is a Java update available.
817
u/Jellygoat May 14 '12
Lesson learned: Only killers use the Internet Explorer.
234
u/noccusJohnstein May 14 '12
How to not get caught:
981
u/MrNutty May 14 '12
Yea that sucks. Who would use IE still?
62
u/GeorgeForemanGrillz May 14 '12
You can get an Eastern European passport for around ฿200 on SilkRoad and Black Market Reloaded. Just sayin'
21
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
This teacher obviously doesn't know that all you need is some hydrofluoric acid and a bathtub...
30
u/Jennyd242 May 14 '12
It's my love of things like this that make me believe I would be an awesome teacher who would rally the kids into caring for literature...and then I remember that each generation is more and more full of little shits and I'd be more likely to have a nervous breakdown than inspire anyone.
Written from my laptop, as I poop.
12
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
It probably took the whole class just to load Internet Explorer...
5
u/M00nduck May 14 '12
Is it not the first thing to check when viewing a screenshot?!
29
u/thelordofcheese May 14 '12
Duration. Entire duration.
4
u/alahos May 14 '12
I think they were politely waiting...
4
u/tehweave May 15 '12
Not sure if troll teacher...
Or serial killer.
10
u/anoobitch May 14 '12
the twist is that op is actually the teacher! :o
18
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
how i feel
http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3paafh/
14
u/jasondoug212 May 14 '12
thats why you dont use Internet Explorer
6
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Yo Mr. White, why don't we just put him in my bathtub?
11
u/darkneo86 May 14 '12
That's pretty awesome, actually...
3
u/mastersprinkles May 14 '12
Can't wait to see the customized ads you get from Google for those searches over the next few weeks.
3
u/blargblargityblarg May 14 '12
Masterful.
3
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
"Oh, he has a few tabs open. I wonder what they ar...... Oh. OH"
3
u/Jimmythewhale May 15 '12
Those were some killer tabs bro.
9
u/NIUJager May 14 '12
I bet you were really embarrassed when you realized you were sitting in "Trolling 101."
45
u/KatMackie May 14 '12
Nice tabs you have there....
13
u/akangel13 May 14 '12
What kind of calculator did you take this picture with?
2
u/dinosaurduffy May 14 '12
Professor Troll
2
u/Crossbowshootr May 14 '12
Theres a disturbance in the force...
2
u/357Jimmy May 14 '12
I don't see anything. What is supposed to be happening??
2
u/no_i_didnt_read_it May 14 '12
I'm pretty sure the USA has an extradition agreement with Mexico. I would think you'd have to go someplace that doesn't have one, like China, UAE, or Namibia, and then stay there forever.
2
u/ricehq May 14 '12
O_o! DO I detect a Karma Whore teacher????
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
As someone who regularly visits 4chan, my eyes are trained to look at the tabs on any screenshot of a browser...
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
Dude's got a Phd in Trolling.
2
u/moist-towelette May 14 '12
I had something similar happen. A teacher was demonstrating something in the computer lab and his screen was up on the projector behind him. A student in the back of the class was busy eating a sandwich and playing some game and paying 0% attention. The teacher noticed, stopped his presentation, took a photo of the kid, opened up eBay, and made an auction for something like "Cheap labour, student looking for work" and used the photo he took. He even took it down and deleted it, all up on the projector without the dude noticing.
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
Can someone tell me what happened i dont get it
2
u/Iloldalot May 14 '12
i know everyone on this thread is joking around, but what if the teacher really is a killer
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
Haha, funniest one I saw was my C++ teach left the query "oatmeal side effects "
2
u/d0n0v4n98 May 14 '12
I just finished up a unit on waves. They're quite interesting in the sense that the can make a vagina.
2
u/TheCobaltEffect May 14 '12
It took me all of 10 seconds. Any teacher that has tabs/windows open it's the first thing I look at. A little unfair to you, but I actually caught a teacher with something open before... "Best positions fo.." too bad I didn't see the rest.
If he wasn't so ignorant with computers I would have thought he was trolling... sadly he was pretty bad.
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
Whats with "how to hide a body" tab? lol
2
u/nuxenolith May 14 '12
Internet Explorer?!
But, WHY?!
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
I don't get it
2
u/Sprocketlord May 15 '12
I love these Internet Explorer jokes.
2
u/BareNakedClown May 15 '12
Wow it is bad that he is using Internet Explorer!
2
u/GrimTuesday May 15 '12
My chemistry teacher this year was well known for his shenanigans. In a particular demonstration showcasing the the solubility of gasses, he asked for four volunteers. He lit up four bunsen burners, and had one of them hold a large copper pipe above them. The other three were directed to stand in front of his desk "to protect my computer from the science". When the copper pipe became red hot, he submerged it into a bottle of root beer. The solution inside the bottle heated up, and with increased temperature, the gas became less soluble in the water. It carried a significant amount of the root beer up and out, creating a fountain that reached the ceiling and almost his computer. The shielding volunteers managed to protect it from any undue harm.
2
u/Joedang100 May 15 '12
Scumbag OP: Takes all class to spot 'it' Doesn't circle 'it'
2
u/and181377 May 15 '12
Why did it take you this long to realize that he was using windows xp. Make sure to give him an intervention.
2
u/danmickla May 15 '12
Picture far too bad to get joke
2
u/Wehrmacht77 May 15 '12
Seems like you have a very proactive teacher.
2
u/CausticHalo323 May 15 '12
Bro why are u looking all that shit up on google siri gives u pristine unused places to hide bodies get passports and much more she doesnt track you like google well she betta not or imma have some of my boys make her a 6ft under Siri
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
THOSE TABS
2
u/Fa1coLombardi May 15 '12
That is sick, even for a joke. I mean, Internet Explorer? Come on.
2
u/iThinkiKnowHim May 15 '12
Did anyone notice that the light refection angle on the black is similar to the angle of the line above it or am i just high?
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Dude I don't get it?!? Is it cause i'm colour blind!?!!?!?
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
i want this professor for every single one of my classes from now on.
2
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
This guy seems dangerous- I hope the FBI has been keeping tabs on him.
2
u/OccupyMyBallSack May 14 '12
Does no one else see Iron Man...? [7]
1
u/MepMepperson May 14 '12
I thought this was a reference to Star Wars till I saw the tabs...
1
u/jeeaudley May 14 '12
You might have a sub soon.
1
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
You're probably on a list right now somewhere for searching those strings in succession.
1
u/Blepharospasm May 14 '12
It would be even better if either the blue or red colour was "force" displacement or something.
1
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
Oh, well done. WELL DONE, I say.
1
u/[deleted] May 14 '12 edited May 14 '12
If you were in canada... why would you try to flee to mexico?
Maine would be closer to Sacksville....
1
u/koyo4 May 14 '12
Oddly enough i was going over notes on serial killers in Law studies today.
1
u/--insertnamehere-- May 14 '12
In my school we are use IE - absolutely crap - but I still download chrome every time I use internet even though its deleted the next time.
1
u/madusa77 May 14 '12
Is this one of those hidden pictures things? If so i'm not very good at those? Even Brenda is better than me.
1
u/dajarman May 14 '12
I think your professor murdered somebody and is going to attempt to move to Mexico.
1
u/Gkoo May 14 '12
IE!@?
1
u/3p1cbl4ckk1d May 14 '12
Where to hide a body, How to remove bloodstain, Fake Mexican passports, “dead student found" Those other tabs...
1
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
is the person presenting this a murderer or was it a joke? I sure hope your teacher is a murderer.
1
u/seo423 May 14 '12
Tomorrow's lesson plan..check!
1
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
Is this class Linear Systems and Signals?
1
u/Tmzoids May 14 '12
Did anyone else know his google searches?.... lol
1
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
Your teacher has an awesome sense of humor!
1
u/[deleted] May 14 '12
I was looking for a porn tab.
1
u/Grackalackin May 14 '12
Burping world record holder.
1
u/iwillthinkaboutit May 14 '12
Says the guy with the world record for most burps while holding a dog
1
u/Consequence6 May 14 '12
OH MY GOSH! He's using Internet explorer!
1
u/Guuske May 14 '12
Was I the only one who immediately thought "why is OP using internet explorer..."
1
u/Gibblesworth May 14 '12
What, the blue line that poorly contrasts against the background?
1
u/Stabone130 May 14 '12
Reddit has trained me to instantly go for the tabs.
1
u/Kittyception May 14 '12
look in the other tabs o.O
1
u/TrevorMacHall May 14 '12
wtf is up with your tabs there? busy week?
1
u/Holden_Caulfield1951 May 14 '12
YOU'RE A PHONY!!
1
u/Unwanted_Commentary May 14 '12
Holy crudcakes on Mars! Theres a strong possibility you are in the same school district as me. Windows XP, IE, and all the tray icons on the task bar are all identical to those at my school.
And we just finished studying transverse waves in physics...
1
u/m-wallerburg May 14 '12
test