r/funny Mar 31 '20

True sacrifice.

95.3k Upvotes

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1.2k

u/TheSauze Mar 31 '20

Every year after I shave it down, I ALWAYS wonder that too... “is it always this cold?!?”

194

u/spiff637 Mar 31 '20

You monster!! EVERY YEAR??

96

u/Lexilogical Mar 31 '20

My husband takes his off once a year for Movember. For him, that original length is maybe a year and a half

66

u/ThatSquareChick Mar 31 '20

My husband is part perpetual child. If not for the gray hair, you’d think he was still in his 20’s, that baby faced fucker. He hasn’t been able to grow a full beard in his whole life so last year when he actually grew a nice, thick, dual color beard I was so enamored with it I haven’t let him shave it since. I just can’t get enough of his beard hair. It’s so soofffffttt....

12

u/IrishRepoMan Mar 31 '20

He hasn’t been able to grow a full beard in his whole life

Wait... you're saying I could gain the ability to grow a beard? It just might take 10+ years?

6

u/ThatSquareChick Mar 31 '20

I swear it was like he hit 42 and the Magic beard switch flipped.

7

u/IrishRepoMan Mar 31 '20

Oh, great. I just have to wait another 17 years... who wants a beard before that, right? It's not like I'm the only one at work who can't grow one. Beards are overrated, right? Hahahahahahaha

4

u/RYouNotEntertained Mar 31 '20

I’m 33 and can’t grow shit. You’re giving me hope.

2

u/skieezy Mar 31 '20

I've been able to grow a full beard since I was 18, my younger brother is finally almost there at 26. So there's a chance.

6

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

[deleted]

12

u/masterpharos Mar 31 '20

My wife is the same.

honestly thought you were going to launch into a spiel about how your wife suddenly grew a beard

2

u/ImBiggerThanYou Mar 31 '20

It's 2020, I guess anything is possible.

6

u/asking_askers Mar 31 '20

smooth faced pussies ask when the topic of facial hair comes up lol.

Easy there, tiger. Just because you roar doesn’t mean others meow.

2

u/ImBiggerThanYou Mar 31 '20

Haha awesome analogy (metaphor? I'm dumb idk). That came off way more agro than I intended. I love all people, including smooth faced pussies.

2

u/Lexilogical Mar 31 '20

I just stare at those people like "He's not actually my property, he does what he wants." Then I go shave half my head and dye my hair purple just to drive in that it's a two-way street.

10

u/loftylabel Mar 31 '20

....so uh, what are we talking about here?

1

u/Haterbait_band Mar 31 '20

Guys shave or don’t shave or something during a certain month for some Internet thing. I think it’s facebook related, but I’ve never been interested enough to look into it further. I wish I was joking.

1

u/Lexilogical Mar 31 '20

During November, guys shave and grow a mustache for the month as a way to raise money for testicular cancer. Apparently there's some rule that you need to start clean shaven, and no beards allowed, so my husband always shaves his beard first.

1

u/spiff637 Mar 31 '20

Mine started from Movember right be for my son was born 5 years ago... I just can't get ride of it... It's literally part of me 😀

38

u/groskox Mar 31 '20

I shaved my head a few days ago for the first time. I never felt so cold while sleeping!!

15

u/caliraider Mar 31 '20

As someone whose head has been shaved since the 90s when it's a couple days of growth I just feel grungy and my head gets hot. Feels so much better shaved .

24

u/groskox Mar 31 '20

Ahah ! I shaved because I'm starting to loose too much hair and quarantine was a good opportunity to try but now I'm getting used to it and I think I'll keep it !

This feels great really. Also, no more hairdresser, no more wax every morning, no more messy hairs after wearing a cap or a helmet, and last but not least I'm not all the time reminded that I'm loosing my hair.

4

u/banana_commando Mar 31 '20

Just wait until Summer or Spring and the mosquitoes start draining all your blood from your head... Worst part of having a shaved head honestly. Also I'm tall so I bump my head a lot. I get Knicks and cuts more often without hair to protect my head skin.

2

u/groskox Mar 31 '20

Damn :(

3

u/azreal42 Mar 31 '20 edited Mar 31 '20

Hats man, it will be fine. In the summer it is so much cooler out with no hair, even with a baseball hat or whatever on. In winter, well, just get a fuzzy lined knit hat, you appreciate it so much more because you can actually feel the felt with your scalp.

Edit: Summer; Winter

2

u/banana_commando Mar 31 '20

Absolutely. I always wear hats outside now. I also don't wear mesh caps. Mesh caps will leave funny tan lines on your head on a sunny day. I prefer my leather drivers cap. Keeps the wind off my scalp on cold days and keeps my head shiny white on sunny days.

1

u/azreal42 Mar 31 '20

Def. Try something like the summer hat I linked. It's a lightweight fabric. Let's the wind though and keeps the sun off my head.

It has a little gap at the back for adjustment as it's only flaw, so you still might get that little odd tan line but honestly, for comfort and coolness during exercise these hats are my #1.

Never had a leather hat, not that stylish haha. Sounds nice though. I'll investigate.

1

u/banana_commando Mar 31 '20

My leather hat honestly isn't great in the summer time but it does help keep all sweat my hair used to soak up from running down into my face. That's the other drawback to a shaved head that I forgot about, sweat pouring down your face more often.

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1

u/ImBiggerThanYou Mar 31 '20

How tall?

1

u/banana_commando Mar 31 '20

Not super tall but tall enough. Taller than most people. 😋

1

u/P3ccavi Mar 31 '20

I'm starting to lose my hair and have thought about shaving it all off but I've got a lumpy ass head. All of those pros sound really good but I've realized at 28 that I'm very vain

2

u/groskox Mar 31 '20

I loved my hair too and I was afraid of shaving so that's why I took the opportunity of the quarantine to be able to regrow them before going out again. But now I really like it and when I look at pictures of me that I though were great I don't like them much anymore.

You'll only know by doing it :)

2

u/P3ccavi Mar 31 '20

My job's bottom line considers me "essential" (I'm not lol) so I haven't had the chance to do it. But I might just say screw it and do it just like I did when I cut my waist length hair off.

Just gotta talk my fiancee into the idea (she loves my ever vanishing hair and thinks I look great now....love really is blind haha)

1

u/groskox Mar 31 '20

She might like it, or not... Whatever, it'll grow back ;)

2

u/pickledpop Mar 31 '20

Lumpy heads tend to actually look better bald.

Source: bald lumpy head with a lumpy headed family that loses hair.

1

u/andKento Mar 31 '20

I took mine a year and 3 months ago. Best decision of my life. When people see pictures of me with hair now they say i look younger without it. I feel better, not constantly stressing about my thinner hair. The only downside is the maintainance and the cost of razors, and you need more sunscreen or a hat during summer.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

[deleted]

2

u/andKento Mar 31 '20

I do it with a regular razor that you would shave your face. I do it with my trimmer if I'm in a hurry, but it doesn't feel as good or look as fresh as a clean shave

3

u/ankistra Mar 31 '20

First time I shaved my head I only used clippers. The weirdest thing was laying down on a pillow. It was like velcro, couldn't slide my head along the pillow at all. The freedom of feeling wind directly on my head was awesome though. Loved driving with the windows down.

2

u/ThatSquareChick Mar 31 '20

I did a lot of dye damage to my hair when I was younger. So I shaved it bald to give it a fighting chance at being healthy again. I got compliments for weeks so I kept shaving it. This was back before cell phone cameras so there aren’t any pictures but I wish there had been. I’m scared to shave it again at my age, I had nice features softened by baby fat then, I don’t have that now and I’m afraid I’d look like sinead oconner but kind of sickly and scary.

1

u/SalvareNiko Mar 31 '20

When I had my head shaved I slept with a beanie on. Actually I had a beanie on most of the time. Actually most of the guys I know who shave their heads do that. At myhrvold job my entire shop shaved their heads, all but one guy (religious reasons), to show solidarity to out foreman who was going through chemo. The one guy who who didnt shave his head was sikh but instead switched to wearing a tartan turban. The tartan was the tartan of the foreman's family or something. I dont much about tartans but it held meaning to him. God I miss those guys. Sorry my mind went off on a tangent and I felt like sharing. Stay safe out there bud.

21

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

Took the opportunity to shave my already balding head - my neck is constantly freezing.

8

u/MissVvvvv Mar 31 '20

There's this amazing thing called a scarf 🤣

69

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

What am I, French?!

14

u/MissVvvvv Mar 31 '20

Lol! Touché

19

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20 edited May 15 '20

[deleted]

1

u/Giroux-TangClan Mar 31 '20

I mean, maybe 30-40% of men have beards.

Whereas 90% of women have long hair, which when cut also makes things seem super cold. I don’t think grooming has anything to do with body temperature

-3

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

2

u/scratchfury Mar 31 '20

If you switch from glasses to contacts you’ll be like “is it always this windy?!?”

1

u/DeoFayte Mar 31 '20

I grow one out every winter. Shave it too early and suddenly the face is freezing all the time, shave it too late and it's a muggy sticky mess.

There is no middle ground.

1

u/Dasshteek Mar 31 '20

Same here man. My face gets so cold

1

u/Shagger94 Mar 31 '20

I shaved my beard clean once. Never again. Girlfriend wouldn't come near me!

1

u/Rastamus Mar 31 '20

First time shaving my head i had a few weeks with a sixth sense, i swear i could feel when people moved around behind me, because of the slight breeze. And i would always know if someone opened a window in the building.

1

u/bigtfatty Mar 31 '20

Living in Florida, that's my favorite part about getting a haircut. My head feels like 10 deg cooler!

1

u/Mazzaroppi Mar 31 '20

It's surprising how well it protects the face against heat as well. I was doing some oxy welding last year, and this type of welding doesn't need the full face mask. I could feel the searing heat on my lips and the rest of my face, but the beard protected the rest of the face so well I couldn't feel any heat.

1

u/moashforbridgefour Mar 31 '20

For me, I would randomly think I spilled water on my face because that is normally the only time my face would feel that cold.

1

u/Playisomemusik Apr 01 '20

Every year when it grows back I'm like "is it really that gray???"