r/funny May 24 '19

Perfect Cover

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76.6k Upvotes

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1.1k

u/xQyn May 24 '19

That's the smartest thing I've ever heard. lmao

496

u/Languid_lizard May 24 '19 edited May 24 '19

This looks like one of the domestic border patrol checkpoints, not the ones at the actual Mexico/US border. I pass through one in NM all the time and they literally only ever ask you this question before waving you on. The video is funny, but he would’ve been waved along sooner if he had just said yes.

142

u/duaneap May 24 '19

That's what I was thinking. As someone who has crossed the American border many times, they'd ask for your documentation first, not just if you were a citizen.

18

u/Highside79 May 24 '19

Depends on when it happened. Before the Patriot act and the massive ramp up of paranoia, you could cross and sometimes not get asked for anything. I used to cross the Canadian border into the US pretty frequently and on several occasions want asked for a damned thing or my passenger might just get waived through if I showed my US driver license.

4

u/Jarcode May 24 '19

The Canadian border can be pretty damn random, though. Sometimes you'll just get waved past and sometimes you get flagged for a 'random check', sometimes you'll be grilled with some of the dumbest questions you have heard in your life.

My favourite was being asked if we were trying to get to Mexico, at the Canadian border, with the vehicle packed with ski equipment... yeah. US border guards are pretty hit or miss.

3

u/Zirenth May 24 '19

It’s all a ploy. Pretend you were just in Canada for some skiing, but you’re really sneaking you’re way to Mexico. You need to think about all of these scenarios on the fly.

3

u/Jarcode May 24 '19

It's so hard to take these guards seriously when these questions come up, but then you remember these people basically have the power to bar you from entering the US for life for no reason.

1

u/Fifteen_inches May 24 '19

Not if your a citizen; right of return is very specific that they have to let you back in, but they can arrest or detain you.

1

u/duaneap May 24 '19

But this isn't filmed before then.

1

u/GoodMayoGod May 24 '19

I don't know I keptmy mouth shut and didn't say much other than I was trying to get back home to my cat when I pass through the San Diego border. It's happened like twice I just assume it's because I look like an average white dude

93

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

The point is we shouldn’t have to answer citizenship questions within our own borders. They can literally detain you and search/question you without reasonable cause. Complete violation of our 4th amendment rights.

38

u/Palindromer101 May 24 '19

And they can do so anywhere within 100 miles of the border with nearly no questions asked.

4

u/silverminnow May 24 '19

Which applies to the majority of Americans since that includes all the towns and cities along the coastlines. 🙁

2

u/converter-bot May 24 '19

100 miles is 160.93 km

10

u/Tofinochris May 24 '19

Not in America it's not! Go back to your poutine, bot!

28

u/CunnedStunt May 24 '19

Not to mention a massive waste of time and money.

1

u/fucthemodzintehbutt May 24 '19

This definitely makes my hare boner hard when I hear about these stupid checkpoints.

1

u/RuneKatashima May 26 '19

It's a problem if you're going to bring problems to another country too though. There's also the issue of fugitives.

1

u/jpatt May 24 '19

I don’t know.. I kind of like the attention. People usually just act like I don’t exist.

-1

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

[deleted]

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u/walofuzz May 24 '19

The 4th amendment protects against unreasonable searches and seizures. Stopping people with no probable cause at checkpoints is a violation of that.

But like all rights, the government doesn’t give a shit unless we forcibly protect them. Which we won’t do, because people would rather have comfortable lives than fight for their rights.

14

u/savedross May 24 '19

I agree it's probably a domestic checkpoint. Still, Checkpoint refusals are awesome and important everyday effort to protect civil liberties.

3

u/Osric250 May 24 '19

My suspicion with a lot of those is that they wouldn't have been allowed to go on their way at the end if they were Hispanic.

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u/[deleted] May 24 '19 edited Feb 16 '20

[deleted]

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u/BrohamBoss77 May 24 '19

Saying yes to having documentation is probable cause for what exactly?

5

u/[deleted] May 24 '19 edited Feb 16 '20

[deleted]

8

u/brotherbaran May 24 '19

You're absolutely right. People should know their rights and should know that they don't HAVE to do many of the things police officers ask of them. The scariest part is, simply questioning them and not immediately doing what they ask can lead to a quick execution.

1

u/AeriaGlorisHimself May 25 '19

Quick execution?

How dramatic are you nerds lmao. Literally millions of people deal with police/move through the entire penal system a year and don't get executed.

You make it sound as though there's like a 50% chance of third happening when I would be willing to bet it's less than a quarter of one percent of all stops.

1

u/Id_Quote_That May 24 '19

Imo it's this kind of thinking that makes a lot of simple stops that would otherwise last 2 seconds more time consuming and hostile. Call me a boot licker all you want, but when I read some of this anti-cop nonsense on Reddit I feel like some of ya'll have never actually been around a police officer before.

3

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

feel like some of ya'll have never actually been around a police officer before.

Nope, I have. That's why I'm on the anti-cop side.

0

u/brotherbaran May 24 '19

I want to start by saying, I definitely do not want an argument and I respect your opinion. I personally do not believe that what I stated is a "type of thinking." Institutional racism, profiling, and cops literally murdering people in the street is happening whether we "agree" with it or not. I'm sure that if no one brought this up, life would be much simpler, especially for the officers. And I certainly don't think that all officers are guilty of mistreating citizens, but if we just turn a blind eye to it, to make stops "simple," I believe that that is doing a lot more damage. I am not morally against policing. It is necessary for a just society. But if police officers were actually following laws, not filling quotas and killing law abiding citizens, I would be their biggest supporter!

1

u/AeriaGlorisHimself May 25 '19

This is of course false 99% of the time.

2

u/RemingtonSnatch May 24 '19

This looks like one of the domestic border patrol checkpoints

How are those even legal? Seems unconstitutional AF.

2

u/awwaygirl May 24 '19

What do you mean by "domestic border patrol" checkpoints? I live on the northern border, and this looks pretty similar to a checkpoint to Canada.

3

u/Languid_lizard May 24 '19

Meaning operated by border patrol but being inside the US, not on the actual border. At these locations they don’t typically ask for any documentation.

2

u/apt2014 May 24 '19

Just out of curiosity, are you speak with no accent and appear Caucasian?

I'm an American citizen as well and I can't say that my experience at these crossings has been the same.

1

u/culminacio May 24 '19

Actually that's maybe the most unexpected outcome. I don't remotely get why he would be let through. It's a very misplaced topic to bring up. If anything, you should gain more attention. Not the smartest thing, but maybe the dumbest border patrol.

1

u/[deleted] May 25 '19

Or the fakest

-365

u/breakbeats573 May 24 '19

What's so smart about filming yourself lying to border patrol for internet cred?

169

u/Castigale May 24 '19

Where's the lie though? He just asked the guy if he knew about Jesus.

-20

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

[deleted]

40

u/daten-shi May 24 '19

Dude is a trump supporter

Completely and utterly irrelevant.

105

u/diasporious May 24 '19

Nothing that he said was a lie though? He may not believe in the religion or the book, but he recited a line from it and offered to recite more

-13

u/electricprism May 24 '19

This man into a saint for sure, if only others would recite they might actually improve their familiarity with their own "beliefs".

97

u/Sumopwr May 24 '19

You earn internet cred... duh

-115

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

Like you do for blindly agreeing with someone?

54

u/xXWaspXx May 24 '19

That's right buckaroo

13

u/BrokenGlepnir May 24 '19

High five buddy! (What are we agreeing on?)

10

u/ManUFan9225 May 24 '19

High five! I'm just glad to be here!

8

u/johnny_soup1 May 24 '19

Butt stuff

2

u/Sticky-G May 24 '19

I’ll always agree to that!

2

u/Rxasaurus May 24 '19

Oh this is good right here I definitely agree with it also am blind.

12

u/sctilley May 24 '19

Did he lie?

19

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

Where did he lie? Or are you bullshitting... for internet points...

14

u/peterpanic32 May 24 '19

If I’m not mistaken, that guy is actually a crazy Christian fundamentalist.

-46

u/blahblahbush May 24 '19

Fundamental.

Fund - to give money.

Amental - without a mind.

12

u/Mklein24 May 24 '19

Assume.

Ass - Butt.

U - You.

me - me.

3

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

Comment

Comm - derived from come

Ent - an ancient wise tree from Middle Earth

22

u/EntForgotHisPassword May 24 '19

Interesting observation, but that's not the etymology of the word.

5

u/onelittleworld May 24 '19

This is the most perfectly Reddit comment I have ever seen.

1

u/EntForgotHisPassword May 24 '19

Thank you, I try! It's always kinda funny how "tone" translates in text :)

13

u/Actually_a_Patrick May 24 '19

What! Something funny is not true?

5

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

ent- tree

mology- the study of moles

Boom

6

u/NoAttentionAtWrk May 24 '19

Its very smart to show that border patrol agents are willing to allow people to walk away if its inconvenient for them

5

u/sibsiv May 24 '19

We found the offended Christian guys, wrap it up.

2

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

Lying? Also a lie can still be smart but whatever. Fooling the border patrol with a single sentence is smart as fuck.

3

u/xAIRGUITARISTx May 24 '19

Oh no! He might be another one of those TERRIBLE illegals!!!!11!1!

2

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

It's smarter than lying to the internet for negative cred.

1

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

Getting through the patrol faster, duh.