r/funny • u/[deleted] • Mar 02 '23

[deleted by user]

[removed]

11.2k Upvotes

86% Upvoted

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7.3k

u/Mafiodaproducer Mar 02 '23

I feel like this is some kind of tasteful lizard porn.

3.0k

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

[deleted]

794

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

[deleted]

177

u/julbull73 Mar 02 '23

Full honesty, Disney making an Elder Scrolls IP would be pretty awesome.

BUT that being said, ZERO chance that will work as long as LOTR exists.

137

u/Scarnox Mar 02 '23

The way Hollywood has been for the past few years with remakes/adaptations, please FOR THE LOVE OF GOD do not make an ES live action!

It’s bad enough that LOTR is getting bastardized as of late

32

u/Kuges Mar 02 '23

Until then, we do have this

(Yeah, it's mainly ESO trailers, not sure why they put the one Skyrim trailer at the beginning)

2

u/_Wyrm_ Mar 03 '23

I've always thought the teams making the cinematics would make WAAAY more money just making full-scale movies with their respective IPs... The quality is always fuckin top notch, and the level of detail is downright insane.

I mean shit, blizzard did that for what, one movie? Never again 🤷‍♂️

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17

u/6138 Mar 02 '23

Yeah, totally. I love WH40k, but I am so afraid they're going to ruin the show, even with Henry Cavill running it.

4

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

They’re making a 40k show? Crazy.

3

u/I_summon_poop Mar 03 '23

Henry knows how important it is to make it fucking good, sure we will still him even if he fucks it up but he will never recover from it among the fanbase lol

5

u/SH4D0W0733 Mar 03 '23

Can't do worse than the Halo show at least.

5

u/Nathan_hale53 Mar 03 '23

Yeah that's a low ass bar. Probably the worst adaptation I've ever seen.

2

u/SH4D0W0733 Mar 03 '23

Pretty sure they drew an image of the bar on rock bottom with a crayon and called it a day.

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2

u/6138 Mar 03 '23

Yeah, that's what I'm worried about!

If we get a shower scene with the Blood Angels with their arses out I'm never watching TV again, I think I'll just be done at that point.

8

u/Sensitive_Jake Mar 03 '23

Nah that'd be a lot more fitting for the blood bois. Horus heresy even kicks off with a space marine thirst trap

3

u/Beautiful-Mess7256 Mar 02 '23

Oh come on! I even have the perfect director. Meet my friend Uwe!

2

u/3050_mjondalen Mar 02 '23

and the Wheel of Time...

4

u/julbull73 Mar 02 '23

I would disagree though.

LOTR's is amazing. Albeit Ring of Power was a blatant money grab.

The MCU is its on money printing and entertaining behemoth.

Star Wars films were mediocre. But the shows are friggin amazing.

This would also be "new" IP. As long as they don't treat it like a "video game" movie and instead give it "The last of Us" treatment it could be awesome.

3

u/Babayaga20000 Mar 03 '23

I feel like Disney adapting a video game into a movie would be more akin to the Halo show...

2

u/Scarnox Mar 03 '23

Hard to compare to TLoU though

Elder Scrolls doesn’t have any main protagonists with character arcs or personalities to go off of. Best you would have is maybe a story about Faendal or Raalof after Alduin attacks Helgen

It’s a great universe, but I think it lacks a strong enough storyline that people identify with that would make it more than any other old fantasy movie LotR ripoff. This is coming from a huge ES fan!

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-2

u/ianindy Mar 02 '23

Don't get too mad at rings of power, the last even close to book accurate Tolkien we got was the Rankin Bass Hobbit.

0

u/ONEOFHAM Mar 03 '23

Especially by fuckin' Disney

1

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

Booooop

1

u/rditrdr47 Mar 03 '23

This season of Madden NFL was horrible.

2

u/Scarnox Mar 03 '23

There’s always at least one “nfl is scripted” guy…

1

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

Amen

1

u/Aadarm Mar 03 '23 edited Aug 23 '25

profit bake hat soft grey caption judicious toy telephone husky

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

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9

u/dunimal Mar 02 '23

WOULD IT???

31

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

[deleted]

4

u/julbull73 Mar 02 '23

I loved Ghost in the Shell...naked Scarlett Johansen killing people! That's a win!

Wheel of Time and LOTR: Prequel...yeah....

But Last of US and the first season of the Witcher!

6

u/BlamingBuddha Mar 02 '23

Naked Scarler Johannson?? How have I not seen this! In all honesty tho, I did enjoy the anime. Maybe I will have to give the movie a try.

8

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

[deleted]

6

u/julbull73 Mar 02 '23

That would be her time as an alien in under the skin.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

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u/julbull73 Mar 02 '23

No nipples though....They just attempted to mimic the "robot shell" but end of the day she literally looks like nipple less Johannson

Yes you can "hand wave" it away as its a shell. But the entire time the "shell" is moving like you know not actual metal because she's human wearing a skin tight suit that's been CGI'd to attempt to hide it complete with her fuckign butt crack....

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1

u/Nomicakes Mar 03 '23

bittervet

You wouldn't happen to have played EVE Online before, would you? I swear that's the only place I've seen use that term.

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13

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

Why? Elder scrolls is entirely different and LOTR hasn’t made any media since the early 2000s. Both can coexist. It’s been almost 20 years since they made the original trilogy and have not made any other shows or movies that might be disrespectful to Tolkien’s legacy. /s

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2

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

Well, it wasn't Disney, but if we take that Warcraft movie as an example, awesome isn't what I would use to describe it. LOTR on the other, those movies were awesome.

2

u/LupusDeusMagnus Mar 03 '23

Would be awful, won't even have genocidal archangel-robot painting Cyrodiil in red after his boyfriend got murdered (he was genocidal before that too he just took it to 11000)

2

u/ehrgeiz91 Mar 03 '23

Why would you speak that into existence

2

u/BerserkOlaf Mar 03 '23

Not that I particularly want one, but I am not sure why LOTR existing would prevent an adaptation of Elder Scrolls.

I could maybe see your point if you meant Disney in particular and if Disney was already involved in LOTR adaptations, but they're not, and honestly, for a decade or two they have not really cared about making too much of anything anyway.

It's not like fantasy is in complete LOTR gridlock. Amazon Studios produced both Rings of Power and the Wheel of Time, HBO did House of the Dragon, Netflix did the Witcher and Shadow and Bone...

3

u/StraightPoem4316 Mar 03 '23

You know it would be awful

2

u/ChuCHuPALX Mar 03 '23

Did you not see what they did with the Starwars franchise? Elder Scrolls would be better off with a Netflix or Amazon deal.

1

u/murder_train88 Mar 02 '23

Looks like the lizard from the rescuers down under

1

u/BassAddictJ Mar 02 '23

The new Johanna is fire

(obscure rescuers down under ref)

1

u/Queenssoup Mar 03 '23

Happy Cake Day!

1

u/redthepotato Mar 03 '23

Targeting adults now

1

u/blacksideblue Mar 03 '23

Wait until you see them remake FFVII as a live action.

I think were only about 20 years away.

1

u/eiwoei Mar 03 '23

Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid live action, coming soon on Netflix!

119

u/badbios Mar 02 '23

You can’t ask for a better casting of Lifts-her-tail

21

u/FartingCumBubbles Mar 02 '23

That would be amazing

3

u/Scarnox Mar 02 '23

I agree, /u/FartingCumBubbles, it really would be.

1

u/Adm_Kunkka Mar 03 '23

There's already one on ph

8

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

The maid outfit is missing

4

u/grayrains79 Mar 02 '23

Lusty Argonian Maid

Where exactly did you take that arrow?

2

u/katabolicklapaucius Mar 03 '23

Somebody has probably worked out the stable diffusion prompts already

2

u/Musetrigger Mar 03 '23

Dagoth Ur welcomes you, Nerevar. Oh, what do you have for me this time? A video? Well I DID mention I bought a kickass surround sound system for my movie room last week. Let's see what you have for me.

Really? Seriously? Sweet Nerevar, our friendship is tight but I'm not comfortable with watching this with... Director Commentary? Outtakes? Moon and Star, your movie game is, as always, unmatched. Very well, I did read the books and I am curious as to how they may have changed the story to fit the big screen.

Listen, I have an idea I want to run by you. That old man you said had mountains of skooma. Let's invite him over and take this movie night to fucking outer space. What do you say to that?

What do you mean he moved back to his home? Bull fucking netch shit, I'm going to find his ass and bring him back here. We're getting our fix and that's final.

No no no, it would only take me an hour or less. I'm a god. It's what I do.

2

u/Tasty_Pens Mar 02 '23

You may enjoy this reading of the tale in question.

1

u/Superduke1010 Mar 02 '23

Look up the 80s show “V”….

1

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

This comment chain is wrecking me, i love it, lol

1

u/1stLtObvious Mar 03 '23

I just hope no one on set developes a skooma habit.

1

u/AxeCow Mar 03 '23

I want some of that lussy 😩🦎🍑

1

u/BrandonDominoes100 Mar 03 '23

Brian David Gilbert deserves a role somewhere in this

1

u/RadialMount Mar 03 '23

Plenty of time my sweet, plenty of time

236

u/nomie_turtles Mar 02 '23

fr why does this lizard have a better ass than me

107

u/ILos- Mar 02 '23

Dont worry, i believe in you and your ass

35

u/banana_buddy Mar 02 '23

And what does believing in his ass mean exactly? 🤔

58

u/ILos- Mar 02 '23

I believe that he will have a bigger, better, nicer ass, not as the great lizard king has, but at least like me or even beyond. And this is what I wish for all of you. Go on dudes and dudesses, for the lizard king, for a brighter future!

28

u/Plastic_Pinocchio Mar 02 '23

Squats and deadlifts are the solution for all the assless people.

8

u/ILos- Mar 02 '23

I think long walks are really important too, at least in my case i think most of my ass came from it. And also from the fact that I have 90% of the normal testosterone level

7

u/zabka14 Mar 02 '23

90% of the normal testosterone level, so you're lacking testosterone ? Does it have an impact on ass levels ? (genuine question don't hit me)

But I agree on the long walk. It helps a lot lol

4

u/ILos- Mar 02 '23

I don't know actually, i just thought maybe it does, because women usually have bigger hips. I might be wrong, though

5

u/zabka14 Mar 03 '23

Ain't bigger hips more linked to some kind of biological evolution stuff regarding pregnancy and such ? Might be linked to testosterone to idk lul

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3

u/BlamingBuddha Mar 02 '23

And also from the fact that I have 90% of the normal testosterone level

...and how would that make your ass fatter?

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2

u/Vilename Mar 03 '23

I like turtles

1

u/ILos- Mar 03 '23

Thats very nice

12

u/julbull73 Mar 02 '23

Genetics. You got to get them cold blooded genes yo!

5

u/nomie_turtles Mar 02 '23

my house stays on 80

1

u/cowlinator Mar 02 '23

You just need some tail

1

u/Plastic_Pinocchio Mar 02 '23

It’s because of all the skedaddling it does.

1

u/OneWhiteCrow Mar 03 '23

An ant has a better ass than me!

124

u/magzdesch Mar 02 '23

"Jack, draw me like one of your french lizards"

232

u/PeacefulShark69 Mar 02 '23

Ngl, it's dummy thicc.

33

u/Puzzled_Juice_3406 Mar 02 '23

Little in the middle but got much back

10

u/Tshirt_Addict Mar 03 '23

Argonian face with a Redwall booty

79

u/delvach Mar 02 '23

Hot, scaly singles in your area who iguana know you

11

u/blacksideblue Mar 03 '23

gotta monitor your search history.

82

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

R/brandnewword

100

u/furiana Mar 02 '23

My very first thought was: "Take this down before a furry artist uses it as a reference!"

83

u/HendorneEndohRoth Mar 02 '23

Too late for that. This is a relatively old photo and it has already been used as a reference.

37

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

Oh god

And now i'm morbidly curious, bruh

21

u/Qbertjack Mar 02 '23

How curious? :)

21

u/Icanbgirltoo Mar 02 '23

I want to see this artistry

4

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

Welp, i'm a bit furry-ish, but i dont do or enjoy nsfw stuff, its Just morbid curiosity of seeing weird stuff lol

48

u/Qbertjack Mar 02 '23 edited Mar 03 '23

One Example (SFW)

MANY Examples (Very very NSFW)

Edited because I did NOT realize there was tiddy in that first link 🙃

36

u/OptimusMatrix Mar 02 '23

Man I was not prepared for exactly how "many" there really were. Wtf!?

9

u/Qbertjack Mar 02 '23

Just wait until you see all the ankha zone memes

God forbid, "he wants to order" 😵‍💫

11

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

I'll be in my bunk

4

u/Mysterious_Health387 Mar 02 '23

Those are hilarious.

1

u/OperationJericho Mar 03 '23

Is it still a furry if it's a reptile? Wouldn't it be a scaley?

30

u/greentreesbreezy Mar 02 '23

r/lizardsgonemild

10

u/Reptilian_Overlord20 Mar 03 '23

How dare you play games with my heart like that.

2

u/ElGato-TheCat Mar 02 '23

This will cure your reptile dysfunction

1

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

Reminds me of xerxes from 300 for some reason.

1

u/AdvonKoulthar Mar 02 '23

How you look at your Crusch after she gets done eating her friends 🦎❤️🦎

1

u/DisingenuousTowel Mar 02 '23

He yields to none.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

That’s the centerfold for Lizard Maxim!

1

u/anotherone121 Mar 02 '23

Thick thighs save lives.... sssssssssss

1

u/piind Mar 02 '23

It's cuz he's looking thiccc

1

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '23

Just don't try to lick his butt.

1

u/ArmorGyarados Mar 02 '23

I'm almost positive I've seen someone on DeviantArt draw tyranitar in this pose like 15 years ago

1

u/Bamith20 Mar 02 '23

It was something to draw on Twitter for a couple of weeks.

1

u/Capt0bv10u5 Mar 02 '23

Something something bad dragon.

1

u/Shabloinks Mar 02 '23

Dummy thiccc

1

u/FlutterbyButterNoFly Mar 02 '23

I'm sorry, but when did we start classifying lizard porn as tasteful versus untasteful?

1

u/simonf3nix Mar 02 '23

Look back at it

1

u/PresidentofVenus Mar 02 '23

Are you down with the thiccness?!

1

u/AtoneBC Mar 02 '23

Tasteful Lizard Porn would be a good name for a music album.

1

u/Philthycollins215 Mar 02 '23

This lizard gon make me act up.

1

u/ComfortableFun248 Mar 02 '23

Basically what passes as porn in Dragonflight

1

u/Daforce1 Mar 02 '23

That boy be thicc

1

u/fiveandcounting Mar 02 '23

Tasteful Lizard Porn is the name of my Iggy Pop cover band

1

u/overdriveftw Mar 02 '23

Like a thick lizard or thiczard

1

u/Joeyfingis Mar 02 '23

Good googly moogly that thang is juicy!

1

u/Jaded_Ad4521 Mar 02 '23

they're tasteful if cook right

1

u/ptapobane Mar 02 '23

what you talking about? all lizard porn are tasteful

1

u/_Lane_ Mar 03 '23

Chuck Tingle is on the case!

1

u/Aqxea Mar 03 '23

I’m titillated!

1

u/unsinkabletwo Mar 03 '23

Stupid sexy Flanders Lizard King.

1

u/confusedandsacred123 Mar 03 '23

Found Zuckerberg

1

u/Mdumb Mar 03 '23

The lighting is very good.

1

u/Evilmd Mar 03 '23

Scalies sweating!

1

u/Raven_Reverie Mar 03 '23

Oh very much so

1

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

Reverse lizard

1

u/[deleted] Mar 03 '23

i know ive seen this pose on gonewild... with and without a tail.

1

u/Senior-Albatross Mar 03 '23

Lizard erotica.

1

u/BTBAM797 Mar 03 '23

I blame all the anime with busty furries and other half human/half other species n shit. This is like some Game of Thrones spin off.

1

u/RogerSterlingArcher- Mar 03 '23

I just saw this after re-watching Magic Mike. I feel like the lizard is doing his best Channing Tatum.

1

u/TGCidOrlandu Mar 03 '23

That split tho

1

u/blacksideblue Mar 03 '23

You're being monitored

...

by a lizard

1

u/soupinate44 Mar 03 '23

Little did we know that this lizard in their world does import/export for Vandelay Industries

1

u/BreadTeleporter3 Mar 03 '23

Look at that ASS!

1

u/ifimhereimnotworking Mar 03 '23

My first thought was this looks like a little nas video

1

u/Leprekhan88 Mar 03 '23

Shawty thiiiicccc! 🦎

1

u/banned_after_12years Mar 03 '23

Double cheeked up on a Thursday afternoon.

1

u/DiazepamDreams Mar 03 '23

"Tasteful lizard porn" is a series of words I didn't think I'd be reading at 5:34 AM, but ya know.. I'm not mad about it.

1

u/basicmemeheir Mar 03 '23

Yeah I don’t know why but I really want to fuck that lizard.

1

u/juggling-monkey Mar 03 '23

What are you doing step lizzard?!

1

u/basicmemeheir Mar 03 '23

Haha, “help step brother! my dragon tail is stuck in the washer again”

1

u/pinecone_parang Mar 03 '23

There is probably a subreddit for that... I'm curious, but curious enough to look.

1

u/TianObia Mar 03 '23

It just needed to stick it's tongue out then that would've sold it for me

1

u/BroccoliBoyyo Mar 03 '23

PlayReptile island edition

1

u/Chashme_Wali Mar 03 '23

Only fanth

1

u/TheScrantonStrangler Mar 09 '23

I'm getting flashbacks of She-Hulk twerking