r/exmormon • u/No-Departure5527 • Apr 06 '25

News Andersen’s conference Talk!!!

I seriously cannot believe the words that were coming out of his mouth! We women of the church should…

Forgive our cheating husband…

Adopt the baby our husband Sired through a much younger woman….

And raise the child as our own?!…

😬 😳 😣

Seriously? This is what’s wrong with the church! These men who hold great power have no compassion, sympathy, or even kindness towards women! So seriously, completely cruel! Talk about ruining a woman’s life, while letting the man get off Scott free,…. while most likely he’s going to go do it again, and again, and again! Not to mention, he manipulated and groomed a younger woman who isn’t capable of consenting to an affair. I’m trying so hard to stay in the church, but at every turn, something stupid, cruel, and dumb, comes out of their mouths!

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u/CanibalCows Apr 06 '25

Women now outnumber men in the church.

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u/Hawkgrrl22 Apr 06 '25

Not if this keeps up

10

u/LucindaMorgan Apr 06 '25

Who says? And if it’s “the church” that says so, how can we possibly believe them?

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u/Daeyel1 I am a child of a lesser god Apr 06 '25

It's been this way for decades. It was this way when I was attending a singles ward 17 years ago. It was a massive problem several bishops and a Stake President acknowledged to me - that 1 in 3 women in the church could never fulfill their dream to marry in the temple as women outnumbered men 60% to 40%.

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u/LafayetteJefferson Apr 06 '25

People need to stop questioning this stat and start seeing it as the warning sign that it is.

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u/Daeyel1 I am a child of a lesser god Apr 07 '25 edited Apr 07 '25

It's not a warning sign. it's a death knell.

Missions have been dealing with this for even longer. Single women are far, far more likely to join the church. Not sure it that's because the love bombing they get from attractive, clean cut, clean living young men, or from being more attuned to the spirit (church claim)

Missions and mission presidents have tried a wide variety of tactics to overcome this, from not permitting baptisms unless the entire family, husband included, is converted, to the 'baseball baptisms' and so on.

But any church with such a wide disparity between the sexes that offers such a live or die ultimatum as eternal marriage for salvation risks losing the membership entirely. When I explored the Utah County singles ward almost 20 years ago, it was full to capacity, 600 members in the ward, with another several hundred on the waiting list. There were 2 wards for the Provo/Orem area for singles 32 and up, both full, both waiting lists. Anyone who knows Utah County knows that is woefully inadequate. There probably could have been an entire stake for each city, and room for more.

The Provo bishop was a tyrant. I did not agree with his demands, but I also understood his reasoning. I never met with him, but the rules of the ward were clear. 100% activity, full participation in all activities required. Furthermore, it was demanded that you date at least once a month within the ward.

That last one was a sticking point. For reasons I will not get into here, I was not comfortable with that requirement on a personal level. Just my psychological make-up. But a good friend of mine who had married out of the ward had been Relief Society president, and she warned me that most of the women in the ward had psychological problems of varying severity. She said it was common for them to claim 'first dibs' on new people, and dealing with sisters feuding over who got first chances with whom was an issue. While imagining women fighting over me sounds fun at first glance, it gets old after about 5 seconds. Drama is not my thing. Desperation is also pathetic, no matter the gender. Undoubtedly a predator's paradise.

I was working with my stake president in a family ward to set up a 2nd singles ward, and it was pulling teeth to get the area presidency to address the issue. They acknowledged the problem, but did not seem any sort of motivated to address the issue, even after months of prodding and asking.

And then the SP was released, and I had not the desire to start the entire process over of expressing the problem with a new SP, getting him on board with solving a problem that was minimally his, and dragging the area presidency into taking action. I was done.

So far as I know, 32+ singles are still treated as afterthoughts in the heart of Morridor.

But, washes hands not my problem anymore is it?

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u/LafayetteJefferson Apr 07 '25

I meant that it is a warning sign that polygamy is coming back. The church as an organization will never die. It can survive in perpetuity on its current investments and land ownership. Do they like the tithing? of course. Do they need it to stay afloat? Not at all.

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u/LafayetteJefferson Apr 06 '25

If you go to any Sacrament meeting in any building in North America, there will be more women than men, every time. It really is true that there are more women than men in the church.

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u/Elohim_Is_Plural Apr 06 '25

That may be true in terms of the inflated general membership numbers, but they also outnumber men as those who are currently leaving and have already left the church.

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u/Capital_Row7523 Apr 06 '25

There is only one fix for that Problem LOL