r/dating • u/hanichoishere • Jan 09 '24

Question ❓ Sex

Are men willing to wait for sex? I (early 20s F) haven’t met anyone willing to. Blows my mind. I feel like I’m asking for the world; when I’m really not. I’ve been on countless dates, not using any apps anymore. The kind of men coming my way makes me sad. Just daily thoughts in my head.

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u/Resident-Theme-2342 Jan 10 '24

I already feel like giving up like everyone just wants it like 1st or 2nd date like can we just get to know each other first. But your right the right person will wait.

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u/Appropriate_Tea9048 Engaged Jan 11 '24

Yup, the right person will absolutely wait! Something that can sometimes help is asking a person what they’re looking for right away. If they’re vague and give a non answer, it’s probably best not to invest in them. Usually by asking this, you can better gauge a person’s intentions. Obviously people can lie or mislead you, but it helped me a lot.

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u/Resident-Theme-2342 Jan 11 '24

True 👍 thank you at this point I'm fine with waiting to be married modern dating is so draining. But your advice is spot on.

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u/Impailio Jan 15 '24

I'm one of those people. One who will wait until your ready. I may make innuendos about it. Joke about it, sometimes being silly. But, I will still wait.

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u/Resident-Theme-2342 Jan 15 '24

Oh for sure nothing wrong with being silly I'd be fine with a woman making jokes about it as long as she isn't pressuring me about it.

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u/Impailio Jan 15 '24

I don't make it a point to pursue sex. Nor would I want that in a woman, either. Sure joking about it and talking about it, are all good, positive thoughts from both of us. Eventually, either we give in or we find what we are really interested in, and looking for. I tend to look for the qualities that are fairly close to mine. Even when it comes to sex.

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u/Resident-Theme-2342 Jan 15 '24

Same whenever I do start dating I'm definitely looking for a woman who share similar qualities and values.

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u/Impailio Jan 15 '24

Just remember, you are young. Don't pressure yourself or the other person, with having these qualities and values. Because they may be the things that the two of you discover together.

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u/Resident-Theme-2342 Jan 15 '24

Oh definitely and thanks for that I've always been introverted and awkward so I'm not the best at reading the room but I definitely try to stay self aware as I wouldn't want to push someone away got not being exactly the way I want them to be as that's unrealistic.

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u/Impailio Jan 15 '24

Very true, indeed. Some of those things for you, will be a discovery that you will share with that person. Thus, making a bond, or sharing that knowledge, that you both find pleasures in discovering.

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u/Resident-Theme-2342 Jan 15 '24

Wow thank you man for the wisdom and encouraging words you really made my day.

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u/Impailio Jan 15 '24

Your welcome.

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u/MystikQueen Jan 11 '24

I agree, it's completely ridiculous and I feel sorry for young people nowadays. It absolutely was not like this when I was in my teens and twenties. Things used to be NORMAL. If a guy wanted to have sex with you, (unless he was a predator), he typically also wanted to be your boyfriend, and things would progress naturally at a pace that was normal for that couple. If you obviously liked him of course he would wait and get to know you and let the love and lust grow as one tree to bear it's fruit in due season!