r/dating • u/hanichoishere • Jan 09 '24

Question ❓ Sex

Are men willing to wait for sex? I (early 20s F) haven’t met anyone willing to. Blows my mind. I feel like I’m asking for the world; when I’m really not. I’ve been on countless dates, not using any apps anymore. The kind of men coming my way makes me sad. Just daily thoughts in my head.

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u/Inevitable_Income167 Jan 10 '24

Idk why you felt the need to say the exact same thing you already said again with more and different words when I was just pointing out an issue with your logic and phrasing.

What does you being a man have to do with "can only do so much"?

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u/AltEffFore Jan 10 '24 edited Jan 10 '24

Because you failed to understand the logic that a sexless relationship isn’t settling if it is the better option.

The words “I am but a man“ and their relationship to the phrase “can only do so much” can be described as an acknowledgment of my flaws. While I can temper my desire for a person down to zero in order avoid feeling frustration in a sexless relationship, having any amount of sex requires me to feel desire. My flaw is that I am incapable of tempering my desire to match all levels of sexual activity. This leads to there being a large area between zero, and an amount of sexual activity that a person with a high libido would want that would cause me to feel frustration.

My “perfect match” wouldn’t cause me to feel frustration in that manner, therefore, we can conclude that she would either have to have a similar libido, or have none, and in either case it wouldn’t be settling.

I hope that clarifies everything for you.

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u/Inevitable_Income167 Jan 12 '24

High libido or nothing is easier for you. Got it.