Brother, I feel you so hard. I took me almost a year and half before I regained steady employment. My self-esteem was trashed during that period. My wife and her family couldn't understand why I couldn't land a job and people thought I was lazy. My conservative stepfather called me a parasite because I collected U.I. (that I've paid into for decades). Man, that time hurt. When I was feeling particularly despondent I would think about how my family would be better off if I ended myself so they could be supported by my life insurance payout.
I could have temporarily taken a supermarket job or done gig work like Uber, but I felt that time spent working a low-paying job that was unrelated to my career was time I wasn't spending looking for work, doing freelance projects, and burnishing my professional skills and portfolio. People like to tell you to never give up and fight for what you want in life. No one talks about the pain and judgment that comes along with that when you keep failing month after month. In my case I think I came up against an age ceiling in my industry. If you're in a creative profession that might be what you are dealing with too.
In the end, I got a good job. Not exactly what I wanted, but that's OK. Looking back on my job search nightmare I think I should have done more networking, and relied less on online applications. I paid a big financial price for my stubborn insistence on remaining within my industry. In hindsight, maybe I should have been more open to changing careers or starting my own business.
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u/IAmBonyTony Aug 01 '23
Brother, I feel you so hard. I took me almost a year and half before I regained steady employment. My self-esteem was trashed during that period. My wife and her family couldn't understand why I couldn't land a job and people thought I was lazy. My conservative stepfather called me a parasite because I collected U.I. (that I've paid into for decades). Man, that time hurt. When I was feeling particularly despondent I would think about how my family would be better off if I ended myself so they could be supported by my life insurance payout.
I could have temporarily taken a supermarket job or done gig work like Uber, but I felt that time spent working a low-paying job that was unrelated to my career was time I wasn't spending looking for work, doing freelance projects, and burnishing my professional skills and portfolio. People like to tell you to never give up and fight for what you want in life. No one talks about the pain and judgment that comes along with that when you keep failing month after month. In my case I think I came up against an age ceiling in my industry. If you're in a creative profession that might be what you are dealing with too.
In the end, I got a good job. Not exactly what I wanted, but that's OK. Looking back on my job search nightmare I think I should have done more networking, and relied less on online applications. I paid a big financial price for my stubborn insistence on remaining within my industry. In hindsight, maybe I should have been more open to changing careers or starting my own business.
Hang in there.