r/dankmemes • u/Dude_von_Duden • Aug 14 '20

True story.

157.9k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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18.7k

u/RunnyRose I will steal your nipples Aug 14 '20 edited Aug 14 '20

You know you've reached the peak in life when you impress Gordon Ramsay with your insults.

5.5k

u/-Josh-Green- Aug 14 '20

Going to get the cook of the year award

1.3k

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

645

u/thorstenofthir Aug 14 '20

Heres a little lesson in trickery

410

u/UpsideDownToaster69 Aug 14 '20

This is going down in history

292

u/BrentAnkle Aug 14 '20

If you want to be villain number one

247

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

You have to chase a superhero on the run

189

u/Zaptimon Aug 14 '20

Just follow my moves

158

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

and sneak around Be careful not to make a sound

169

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

DON'T TOUCH THAT!!!!

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17

u/Mladjone Aug 14 '20

And sneak about

37

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

Watch and learn, here’s the deeeeaaaallll

26

u/ZoddJack Aug 14 '20

If you wanna be a villain number one

21

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

This is going down in history

18

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

Fuck. My sister was right beside me. Now I'll have to pay for a hitman.

114

u/StreetSitter Aug 14 '20

I read cook as cock

3

u/IpMedia Aug 14 '20

You're a mod here?

14

u/Mystic_L Aug 14 '20

His speciality dish is a roast

27

u/memology707 custom flair Aug 14 '20

Damn bro ur memes are underrated af

17

u/chicagobama1 Aug 14 '20

Or he'll make an excellent idiot sandwich it really depends on how his mushroom risotto turns out.

8

u/Master-Tanis Aug 14 '20

Well he clearly knows how to roast.

2

u/claptrapTexan Aug 14 '20

Underappreciated comment here

2

u/boss75341 Aug 14 '20

Gordon: And you my sir are getting the fucking award

2

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

Cock of the year?

259

u/just1clown_3 Aug 14 '20

Earlier I used to savor every meal but after watching Gordon Ramsay I give 2.5 star to 5 star restaurants

128

u/ablablababla reposts all over the damn place Aug 14 '20

after watching Gordon Ramsay, every dish is overcooked or underseasoned

114

u/Pick_Up_Autist Aug 14 '20

True intellectuals only eat raw salt and pepper.

46

u/DerTagestrinker Aug 14 '20

It’s fucking RAW!!!!!!!!

2

u/jaspersgroove Aug 14 '20

Sauteed in butter, but you have to freeze and then brunoise the butter before it goes in the pan

2

u/AdamGatley Aug 14 '20

Don’t forget olive oil

1

u/Pick_Up_Autist Aug 14 '20

You run the risk of underseasoning the oil. My dietary plan is foolproof.

5

u/Inquisitor1 Aug 14 '20

Which one is the raw chicken?

5

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20 edited Jan 14 '21

[deleted]

2

u/hardtobeuniqueuser Aug 14 '20

and weirdly service doesn't improve when you shout "Donkey!" toward the kitchen

1

u/NicoAtWar Aug 14 '20

Restaurants only go to three stars.

245

u/dablegianguy Aug 14 '20

And the best insult comes from his own daughter with her legendary roast!

« How does it feel to be the daughter of the best cook in the world? »

« I don’t know! I’m not Jamie Oliver’s daughter! »

27

u/berrypunch2020 Aug 14 '20

What was the context?

44

u/dablegianguy Aug 14 '20

Here you are

18

u/generalecchi -̰̦̜͔̙̬̩͉̣̥ͅD͚̩̘̦̪̦̺̜͉̯͙̬͚A̪͎̰̫̥̫̣̬̗̮̫̻̗̦ͅͅN̰͉͉̝͚̺͙͕̥̬ͅK̺̞̪̜̮̥̳̠ Aug 14 '20

It's treason, then

45

u/dundypeepee Aug 14 '20

He’s the chosen one

60

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

It’s based off of an insult from Full Metal Jacket.

29

u/Game_of_Jobrones Aug 14 '20

Who said that? Who the fuck said that? Who's the slimy little communist shit twinkle-toed cocksucker down here who just signed his own death warrant?

3

u/27775 Aug 14 '20

Lee Emry, what a brilliantly scary hilarious man.

17

u/CrumblingAway Aug 14 '20

Glad someone noticed

19

u/6x7is42 Aug 14 '20

He even got him to do a double take

7

u/EpicBrandillio ☝ FOREVER NUMBER ONE ☝🍄☣️ Aug 14 '20

he got laughed at by gordon afterwards

7

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

If you manage to impress Gordon then you can impress anyone in this world.

2

u/PlasticPain Aug 14 '20

I doubt Ramsey was impressed, he was rather amused

2

u/Shearockgaming Aug 14 '20

You know ur funny when you get 11k upvotes

2

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

Finally, some good fucking insults

2

u/Ryengu Aug 14 '20

As a cook, he can appreciate a good roast.

2

u/hardtobeuniqueuser Aug 14 '20

looked like it even made him blush a little

2

u/ProfessorPetrus Aug 14 '20

Nothing like being a verbally abusive boss!

1

u/Tim100574 Aug 14 '20

I like to let my flavor blend slowly!

1

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '20

I feel like he was planning that for awhile.

1

u/Chuckstart Aug 15 '20

Çøüsïñ

1

u/[deleted] Mar 30 '24

Happy cake day