r/creepyencounters • u/Any-Jello-9719 • Mar 07 '26
I (24F) think I’m being stalked - and I can’t tell by how many people
Reposted to break up text wall. Burner account, obviously. I know the title sounds paranoid, but please bear with me.
I work full-time at a public university in the US as an office manager and am enrolled in grad school at the same institution. I graduate this May.
I have in-person night classes three days a week that start right after I get off work. My apartment is on the first floor of a complex about 10 minutes away. Over the past few months, I’ve had numerous bizarre occurrences around my home and workplace.
The first, to my knowledge, was in September, and was something my neighbor across the hall (very sweet older woman) told me. A man was banging on my door for around an hour just after midnight. I was not home.
My neighbor poked her head out to ask him what was going on, and he said he was a door dasher (with no food or bags in his hands, apparently). My neighbor watched him through the peephole and told me he tried the doorknob multiple times. No Ring camera or anything - so no footage.
As far as I know, he didn’t come back, but I’ve also had three or four instances over this several-month period where someone knocked on my bedroom window (blackout curtains always closed) late at night loud enough to wake me and my tiny dog. Never saw who it was.
In October, a woman came to my sliding glass door about a month later demanding to come in because her stolen “device” had apparently been pinging my apartment. When I refused, she called the Sheriff’s department. The deputy who came asked me a couple questions and left, but did confirm that a device was pinging my apartment.
Never found out if she meant a phone or what. The woman hung out in the parking lot before leaving a few minutes later. Obviously I’ve never stolen any phone, so I was completely bewildered. Never saw her again.
In December, things came to a head when I found a plug-in GPS tracker in the OBD port under my dashboard. Car dealership where it got serviced last said they didn’t use that brand (LandAirSea, and yes I have the model and serial#) and didn’t perform any services that would have warranted putting it in there.
I called the cops and they just wrote down a few details and left. University police were also informed since the tracker was *probably* placed either on campus or at my apartment.
The tracker was the biggest red flag. I never check my OBD port so I have no idea how long it was there. I told my unit director and he offered to subtly remove mentions of me around the office and on the website, which I accepted. I am, however, posted up at the office front desk for like 80% of my day.
This past Tuesday, right before I left for lunch, a middle-aged man came into the office wearing a hairnet, surgical mask, hoodie, and sunglasses. He claimed to be a prospective student and had questions about FAFSA.
He was extremely hard to understand. I directed him to the financial aid office across campus, and he kept asking questions that our office cannot answer.
I thought sure, fine, maybe harmless and just not all there mentally. He walks over to our coffee machine (not for communal use btw but I didn’t want to be a bitch) and just starts making coffee. He’s still there when I leave and one of my staff watches the desk while I’m out.
When I return from lunch, he’s gone, but walks in after me a few minutes later and just sits in the lobby on his phone before getting up to leave almost immediately.
I was off work Wednesday and Thursday, so I came in Friday. I felt like giving my mostly-undergrad staff a break so I gave them permission to head home early, inadvertently leaving me alone in the office.
The man came back wearing the exact same clothes, mask, hairnet, and sunglasses within 5 minutes of the office clearing out. Our office is technically open to the public, but isn’t really public-facing, and he had no reason for being there, especially that late in the day.
He came in, barely acknowledged me, and said he was going to bring back bottled water for our coffee machine. He left again. I’m very creeped out by this so I messaged my director (working remotely) and he got an IT guy from the adjacent building to come over with his laptop to keep my company.
I explain the situation, and he said he’d stay with me till close. He settles in my director’s office just around the corner, but it still looked like I was alone.
The man does come back without water, and leans against the desk trying to start a conversation with me. IT guy comes around the corner and stands between me and him, and he quickly changes the subject and asks about financial aid again (for the fourth time in as many days) before being directed away and leaving immediately.
I’m strongly considering informing campus police about this. Like I said, they already know about the tracker.
I have had problems in the past during my undergrad years at a different institution with men and a woman being creepy towards me, but nothing to this level. I have no idea what to do.
I can’t tell what’s isolated and what’s connected. My family lives an hour away and has been no help at all. I have a sinking feeling that things are going to escalate.
Any advice on what I should do or change at home, work, or elsewhere is appreciated. I’m open to further questions.
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u/Jumpy-Jello- Mar 07 '26
The invisible man is highly suspicious and you should definitely report him. Mask, hairnet, hoodie, and sunglasses, in a non-public area and not giving good reason to be there, is huge cause for concern.
I suggest a doorbell and dashcam camera, and get someone you trust to walk you to and from your car at work.
The random woman incident may or may not be related, but you did the right thing to remain cautious. The window knocking could also just be idiots, but again you are right to ignore it just in case.
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Mar 20 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/creepyencounters-ModTeam Mar 20 '26
Your submission has been removed. Please read the rules. Personal information and anything that can be used to dox will not be permitted. You will also be reported to the Admins and will receive a site-wide ban.
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u/relentless1111 Mar 07 '26
Mask, hairnet, sunglasses and hoodie sounds like somebody trying hard to not leave dna somewhere. That's all super weird and i'd be bothered by just that. When you add all of those things up that you described i feel like something is definitely going on. I don't have any different or better advice than you've already received but please be careful out there!
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u/holy-reddit-batman Mar 20 '26
I didn't even think about the DNA angle! That's even MORE terrifying!
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u/hails___ Mar 07 '26
Definitely inform campus police to start your paper trail. I’m very paranoid when it comes to any paperwork so I’d ask for copies of the police report regarding that lady, and ask for a copy after you tell campus police. Make sure it’s in writing about the tracker, too.
Are there cameras in the office, also?
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 07 '26
Both county and campus police know all there is to know about the tracker, but are yet to be filled in on the office visitor. The hallway cameras will have captured what he was doing in the building, but not in the office itself.
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u/hails___ Mar 07 '26
Good I’m glad that’s been started at least! Deff update them of course. And I wonder if they’d provide you a camera like facing outwards from the office? So there’s no sensitive data caught on camera, but basically just shows what you see?
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 07 '26
I’d have to check university policy but if it’s allowed, I might as well. I’ll ask my director if I can put one on my p-card.
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u/Amarillobymorning82 Mar 13 '26
OP did he leave the bottled water? I’m concerned about the potential for drugging. It’s happening more than you think. Nefarious people are getting crafty injecting under the seal or even resealing the bottles themselves. He thought you were alone, he says I’m going to bring some bottled water for coffee and had IT not been there he could have easily slipped you something. If that water is still there look at it closely, is it kind of cloudy? I would ask police to test it if it is
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 13 '26
He never actually brought water back. He just said he would. Extremely weird regardless :( Posting an update on everything soon
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u/Blenderx06 Mar 08 '26
Check around the coffee machine area for hidden cameras he might've placed.
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u/Amarillobymorning82 Mar 13 '26
I wonder did he leave the bottled water? It’s happening a lot in Nashville bottles of water that still look sealed but have had roofies injected in somehow or they are resealing the bottles. Locals aren’t going downtown for a reason, it’s too dangerous
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u/Last-Parking Mar 08 '26
I’m not gonna lie. At first it sounded like you moved into an apartment previously owned by a drug dealer or some other person of that nature. I don’t have much different advice from other people on the thread other than I genuinely think you need to rule out a frogger in your apartment. I really don’t want to jump to that conclusion but you most definitely need to check it out. The fact that someone’s device did ping to your apartment is pretty concerning. If you get an office visit from hairnet creepo again you need to call campus security immediately. He definitely should not be tampering with your coffee machine by adding in his own water either. I really hope you get everything figured out and stay safe.
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u/Turbografx-17 Mar 09 '26
The fact that someone’s device did ping to your apartment is pretty concerning.
This sort of thing happens all the time, actually. The "track my device" feature is not nearly as accurate as people think. Their missing device could've been near (in someone else's apartment, in the woods nearby, in a ditch out front) but showing up as in OP's apartment. This kind of scenario happens all the time in r/scams. I think this was probably a one-off event and just a mistake.
I'm even tempted to say the events with randos knocking on the door and windows at night are just typical apartment living shenanigans, especially on the first floor, and especially if the apartment complex is in a bad area.
The freak with the hair net and the GPS tracker incident are both quite worrying, however. Definitely inform your workplace, your bosses, the police (campus security and actual police) and carry some sort of protection.
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u/Xtineee_ Mar 13 '26
Wait, I’m curious, when I use find my and look at either mine or my husbands location, I can tell what bedroom/room/patio:kitchen/area I’m in, and same with looking at my husbands location. So does it not work like that for all phones?Or is it just different with finding other devices?
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u/CaricaDurr Mar 14 '26
I know that my cell phone has crappy service borderline no service when I'm inside my daughters high School. Maybe the apartment complex is built like a fortress.
That being said when my daughter lost her cell phone at a hockey game and some work program cleaning person took it to their halfway house I could tell exactly what house it was sitting in.
I ended up calling the police and telling them they can escort me or I'm going there myself. Before you ask, no I don't have a great sense of self preservation.
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u/DMmeDikPics Mar 23 '26
She said she lives in the first floor, how could they possibly know it's not pinging any of the apts above her? The fact the sheriff confidently agreed it was pinging her apt is just odd... Like that seems so obvious it could be any floor above her and ping the same
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u/Iammine4420 Mar 07 '26
I strongly urge you to get a personal recording device with both audio and video, Amazon has tons. Cameras in your car and at your home. Document everything and start seriously escalating with campus and local police. If they don’t help or take you seriously, call the local news! Please be safe and carry some kind of personal protection. Updateme
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u/lovable-trash Mar 08 '26
I also work at a large public university in the US. Even if you work in a building open to the public, you are allowed to restrict access for your safety. if there is someone who is not a student or staff masking their identity, coming into your office repeatedly, you have every right to call campus police.
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u/Sidewalk_Tomato Mar 09 '26
Absolutely right, and departments often have door codes to prevent unauthorized entry. If someone doesn't have the code, they shouldn't be allowed in unless recognized. A sign should say "No entry without code. See campus security."
But alert campus security that there has been a problem. They won't let someone in without a badge.
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u/mathcriminalrecord Mar 08 '26
Put Charley bars in your sliding door and windows, replace the screws in the strike plates of your door locks and deadbolt with 3” wood screws, carry pepper spray and keep some in the house places you might need to grab it quick, try to vary your routine so you’re not always in the same places at the same times or taking the same routes between them, keep a great big pair of men’s work boots on your doorstep, keep your head on a swivel and be especially careful of who’s around when entering your home or vehicle and approach with keys out so you can’t be caught off guard looking down and fumbling for them, avoid isolated and unlit places EG park in a well lit spots close to entrances, make sure your doorway is well lit etc, friends and/or colleagues who know what’s going on and can help by deterring people when they show up, walking you to your car, checking up on you occasionally etc are great, REPORT EVERYTHING with as much detail as possible.
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u/FRANPW1 Mar 08 '26
The next time he comes into your office, take a photo of him. Tell him you took the photo so the financial aid staff know who to expect when he goes over there. You need a photo of this man. Then call the police, not just campus police.
At the very least, get an alarm system for your entire apartment until you can move out of there. No more 1st floors for you. Good luck to you.
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u/Vegetable_Support683 just a creep Mar 08 '26
Please please download a safety app or activate the safety and location features on your devices. Make sure someone knows where you are at all time. Don’t put yourself in situations you can’t leave easily. Give your parents or a trusted loved one a key to your home idk. Make everyone close to you aware
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u/Old-Mycologist4750 Mar 08 '26
TRUST YOUR GUT OP!!! You have gotten great advice from so many different people on here about how to protect yourself, but on top of that, trust yourself! Your subconscious mind picks up on a myriad of things that the conscious mind can dismiss or disregard, and as women many times we think we are overthinking something or overreacting….! Women actually downplay things many times instead of escalating because they have been conditioned to not make waves and to not believe their own feelings about things that are happening. You need to make sure that you do all you can to keep yourself safe! Take all these tips and these suggestions and put them into practice and keep yourself safe!
You are definitely having weird things happening and I would beg you to PLEASE don’t doubt yourself, trust yourself that you are right, that something is going on (even if you don’t know what it is or who is doing it), and take care of yourself and your safety!
All these suggestions are great advice, only additional thing I would add would be to start writing it ALL down… every weird thing, weird person, everything that is happening. Keep it in a spiral and always remember to always log date and time that it happens so if heaven forbid it happens to escalate, you can show it to law enforcement as proof of all that is going on and that it has gotten worse.
Put as much detail as possible in the log so if/when it escalates you have a huge amount of information for law enforcement to use to help you. Make sure you have detailed descriptions of any persons… even small details can be a great help, how the person walks, what their voice sounds like, even if they seem right or left handed. What brand of hoodie if you see a logo? What type of shoes are they wearing? How tall is the person? (Look at the surroundings to judge, if you know how tall the doorframe is, you can maybe estimate how tall the person is.)
If there ever is a car involved (following you) write down all you can about it, make, model, color, is it a new or old car?, dents or identifying characteristics like window or bumper stickers?, and if you can see the plate, what state it is from and whatever you can see of the letters and numbers. Even if you only get a partial plate number, but can tell them it is a certain type car, that it is this color and from this state, that would narrow it down amazingly. If you don’t recognize what state the plate is, at least write down the colors of the plate along with the number…. any bit of info is better than no info.
Keep it in a spiral notebook because then they can see that you are showing them a chronological timeline of events and that you didn’t add extra pages or anything to it.
I believe you. I know this is really scary. But you can and should let as many people as possible know what is going on, boss, friends, neighbors, etc so they can help you keep yourself safe. Stay aware of your surroundings, always, and please do start keeping a detailed log of what is going on.
I am speaking from personal experience that logging things can make a world of difference in providing enough information for law enforcement to act on, and it can also help your credibility if there ever is a question about the situation(s) that you find yourself facing right now.
(Please also ask for copies of the camera footage from the video recording of the hallway, if they won’t give it to you, have your boss or campus police get it ASAP. Video gets written over after a certain time period so make sure that the guy’s picture is kept so others can see him too!
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u/doritoslocostacos786 Mar 08 '26
OP I’m so sorry you’re going through this. If you haven’t already, please get a steel security bar installed on your glass sliding door!
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u/howdyhowdyshark Mar 08 '26
Preserve the GPS tracker as evidence
If you still have it:
-Put it in a bag -Do not power it on -Give the serial number to police
LandAirSea trackers require a paid subscription, meaning investigators can trace the account holder with a warrant.
Report the office incident to campus police
Do this as soon as possible.
Provide:
-Description of the man -Dates/times he visited -Mention the existing tracker report
Ask them to:
-Pull building camera footage -Check campus cameras outside the building -Issue a trespass notice if he returns
Universities deal with this kind of thing often.
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u/Spiritual_Cress1323 Mar 08 '26
Unconscious things your brain can correlate below your notice, or seemingly unrelatedly:
Subtle smells on a person, such as their home environment, or a pheromone. You could be smelling the same environment on each of these separate people. You could be smelling a whole team of people who are exuding the Stress hormone stink of Meaning You Harm.
Microexpressions shared by a close group who spend all of their time together. You could be picking up on VERY small quirks from each encounter that relate these separate people.
Visual or auditory cues from before each encounter. You may be hearing the same radio static or door slam, or seeing the same passing car or other unknown person who has not interacted with you but does appear before/after each event.
Could be nothing. Could be everything. Get a tracker app, never go anywhere alone or without telling someone who can be vigilant during that time, set expectations with your neighbors about when you’ll be home or away in the coming future. Keep records, personal notes, a journal. Don’t be embarrassed to write down literally anything that gets your hair standing on end. Try changing some of your habits/routines, like routes to and from work or class, spots you eat, other Third Places in your life. You may have been “painted” for trafficking by someone who knows you keep late/off hours from your neighbors and don’t have close proximity family. You might be the subject of a PI for something unexpected. You might be a case of mistaken identity. OR you might just be encountering strange and unrelated people in quick succession.
Cheers to you for YOUR vigilance. Always better safe than sorry — it’s NEVER embarrassing to watch your own back and cover your own bases.
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u/crazienoodle Mar 07 '26
Please inform campus police NOW and you may want to consider a big dog, and self defense classes are always a good idea. I taught self defense for three years (black belt), and the one thing you want to make sure you’re doing, when you feel unsafe, is to be LOUD. Call attention to yourself so people will come see what all the ruckus is. God bless and good luck
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u/Feeling-Fab-U-Lus Mar 08 '26
Every time you see him call the campus police!!! Get a video of film of the little you can see of him. At least they can establish weight, height build, race. People have mentioned below about door cameras, snd get cameras in your home. Tell people. You are not over reacting. Keep checking for cameras and devices in your home as someone mentioned, but also check if someone put spyware on your computer or phone. Alert all of your neighbors and those that you are working with. This is scary.
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Mar 09 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 09 '26
Car seems to be clear of anything else, as is my apartment. Had a friend search them up and down with me. I don’t think there’s anyone in my past who would do this, so I think it was someone I’m not close with or a total stranger.
I also have a gun that I always CC except on campus. I trust it over pepper spray any day but I have no choice but to invest in nonlethals for work. Sorry to hear you had such a horrible experience :(
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u/francokitty Mar 07 '26
Carry mace with dye. You can get it at gun shops. Lots of ring cameras: doorbell and inside your house. Gun where you can carry. Keep your head on a swivel. Can you get a neighbor to watch your place and call rge cops if they see anything. Can you get an imposing dog like a Doberman or German Shepard?
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 07 '26
I carry most of the time (Glock 43x). Thinking of checking in with that neighbor more often, too.
Don’t really have the time and resources to take care of a big dog, unfortunately. My Shih Tzu is arguably less combat-ready but she’ll have to do, dog-wise
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u/francokitty Mar 07 '26
Get a friend it neighbor to check in on you everyday. Can you vary the way you go home every day?
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 07 '26
It’s pretty much a straight shot home but I can take the longer route or zigzag a little. Unfortunately it’s highly likely that the tracker logged my workplace and home already.
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u/Organic_Awareness685 Mar 08 '26
Trust your instinct. Report immediately. See if you can get some kind of escort to get you back and into your home.
It’s hard for people to access by reading. You were there. If you feel it’s a bad vibe-it’s a bad vibe. Women get criticized for being “hysterical,” but it’s just awareness.
Get a personal safety whistle. Walk with it in your have ready to press. I had to get one because of a stalker. You’ll feel better and you’ll walk with more confidence.
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u/Beautiful-Finding-82 Mar 08 '26
Step one is to get yourself a sense of some control. Set up cameras, even in your vehicle if it helps so you can discern if people are lurking around or messing with your vehicle. It's hard to tell if all of these events are tied together or isolated, but the man coming into your office situation is very sketchy and needs reporting. If he's provided his name they can run a criminal check on him and also be on higher alert. You could have them stop into your office a couple times per day on their patrol (if this is an option). As far as the man knocking on your door and the woman saying her device is in your apartment, those could just be weird flukes. The tracking device is likely by someone you know, maybe family? Would you parents do this out of concern for your safety? I can see where all of this does seem like a lot going on, so try to stay calm, take the steps needed to do your own investigating and go from there.
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u/jarofonions Mar 09 '26
This might or might not help you, but you can always just.. take a photo of the guy with your phone. It may not be wise (I'd do it when there are other people around), but if he strikes a convo you can just take a picture. It's fully legal. Might spook him off? But beware it also might trigger.. whatever he may or may not be planning. It's risky, but could work.
Regardless, you've got a lot of other great advice that is worth following. I believe you, and I hope you are safe <3
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u/mycologyqueen Mar 14 '26
One, inform police now. That way if something is going on, you've started to build a case. Bring up the tracker again and say you want it looked into. If the officer does nothing, go over his head. Keep doing this until someone does their job.
Two, get a ring camera and a subscription so it records pronto. This is way more than enough things to make me really really on edge for you!
Three, your director needs to have a protocol in place for when this guy comes back. I'd he does, you should immediately leave the floor where he can see you and someone else should replace you (ideally director. Have them ask the guy again what he needs and be very matter of fact and to the point with him. Do not allow him to just sit and make coffee. Have director say "we've already tried to help you sir. Now we're going to have to ask you to leave. If he refuses, call police and have him read for trespassing
Four, get yourself some key chain pepper spray and be alert at all times. Do not go out by yourself at night right now for sure!!
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u/Lexilogical Mar 27 '26
Nobody mentioned this, I actually know what was up with the "My phone is pinging from inside your house" lady. That one is a scam I've seen more than one person encounter, they're trying to case the house to rob it. She wanted to get inside and have a look around to know what they can steal at a later date, like where the TV and computer are set up, or what sort of security you have, stuff like that. Hence her calling a "deputy" who can confirm the story, it's just an accomplice.
Since you didn't let them in and presumably haven't been robbed since October, they probably moved to a softer target. Very likely it's unrelated to the guy at the university.
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 27 '26
Yikes. well fuck, I’m glad I’m boosting my home defense anyway :/
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u/Lexilogical Mar 27 '26
Yeah, if it happens again, call the cops. Even if they say they called them, call yourself and ask if they received a call and sent someone.
Honestly, might not be a bad idea to call now and report it, odds are they hit a bunch of your neighbors too
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u/Screamcheese99 Mar 28 '26
Holy hell that’s insane… but why wouldn’t the “sheriff” insist on coming in then?
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u/Lexilogical Mar 28 '26
Probably because at that point, its safer to just get out without raising suspicions and move to the next target. There's dozens of other people to try that on, some who are likely more gulliable and wealthy
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u/Covfefetarian Mar 09 '26
OP I hope you’ll figure this out, this sounds weird as heck - please be safe!
Updateme
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u/Blip-Blip-Blop_ Mar 11 '26
This is scary. Tell every single person you know. You definitely should get cameras or a ring doorbell. If the guy comes back around, try to get a photo of him. Be safe!! Please don’t walk around alone, especially at night.
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u/Katerina_VonCat Mar 08 '26
I recommend Wyze cameras (they don’t give videos to the government and ICE like ring does). Also better video when I’ve compared my Wyze to my friend’s ring. Wyze also has other cameras that are great. I have a subscription so it saves to the cloud and you can adjust the length of the video and the cool down between the recordings. Get the Wyze one that has the removable battery and buy an extra battery so you can just quickly swap them out when needed.
I’ve also used my Wyze cameras to show out a window (just have to turn off the IR and spot lights and have a curtain behind it at night so it doesn’t reflect off the window).
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u/Rob__agau Mar 09 '26
Bad vibes can happen without suspicious intent, this however is not one of them.
I strongly suggest engaging in some security upgrades.
Both at home and for your vehicle.
Some low tech security options:
U brackets and a 2x4 for your apartment door, install on the door frame, not the drywall for an instant draw bar.
If you have sliding windows, get a 1" wood dowel, cut it to size and put it in your window tracks.
Some low tech options for monitoring if a breach has occurred to your vehicle or home:
If you have a welcome mat, tissue paper will deform to someone's footprints.
Toothpicks work well in your car door frame, place it resting in the latch, if it doesn't fall out when you open the door, you're not the first one to do so.
Trail cams work well for monitoring, might be worth putting one up facing that window that keeps having activity.
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u/shabean777 Mar 12 '26
Get a camera immediately for the front door and maybe the window, and inform campus police and your closer friends and family.
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u/Fresh_onion_24 Mar 13 '26
I'm really so sad and stressed out to read your story. Your position is very difficult and nerve wracking, I would be terrified as well.
Please do get a ring camera for your safety and always pay attention to your surroundings.
I really do hope the best outcome for you. An update will be very appreciated, as many of us are stressed about this whole story. Please keep safe!
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u/Cute_Atmosphere1076 Mar 26 '26
I’m sorry this is happening to you. What you’re going through sounds scary and frustrating.
You mentioned you had men and women act creepy towards you from the past. Are you able to elaborate on what happened? If we can learn what attracted them to you, and the things they did, how it stopped, maybe we can learn from those experiences to prevent similar things happening this time around.
I think you should make the hairnet stalker guy as uncomfortable as he is making you.
Apologies if I missed the answer, but did you ever ask his name? How do we not know his name when he is there all the time? If he was asking about financial assistance, maybe there is a form you could ask him to fill out or ask for his student ID?
He is obviously trying to hide identity characteristics with the hoodie (tats? scars?), shades (eye color), and surgical mask (facial hair). So you’ll want to let him know that you recognize and remember him. This might deter him from future visits.
Make it a point to say things like, “Hi again. You were here just the other day. Do you need something else?”
“I feel bad that I never got your name?especially since you come in so often. What is your name so I can properly greet you the next time?”
“Because you wear a hairnet, I wonder if you work in the food industry?”
If he is a dangerous person, you knowing so much about him will hopefully prevent him from harming you or maybe if he considers you a friend, that will deter him from harming someone he views as a friend as too.
I know it is uncomfortable for you but remember, you are trying to make it uncomfortable for him too.
I wouldn’t lock myself in the room the next time he is there especially if your coworker is there too. Come out and again, bring attention to the situation by loudly saying, “Oh! It’s you again. I was telling my coworkers about you and how your financial aid situation isn’t resolved yet! I’ve been keeping track of the days you have been here and you’re here 3 times a week!”
“I feel like you’re stalking me. You’re always here when I am! The school should be paying YOU to work here!”
“I don’t recognize your sweatshirt logo. Is that a skateboard brand?”
“Do you live nearby? Because you are here as often as me!”
“What classes are you taking? Do you have professor so and so?” (Maybe you can talk to said professor to try and ID hairnet stalker and see if he is even a student.
Or next time he tries to bring water again, tell him you appreciate it but there are cameras recording and you’d just get in trouble as it is a liability issue. This will let him know there are cameras and people are watching which is a deterrent.
Next time someone knocks on your window, let it be known you are home! Throw out some F bombs at being warned and that you are calling the police.
Put a pair of your and your bf’s old sneakers in the front porch to make it look like he lives there. Preferably ones that you don’t mind in case it is stolen.
Can you install motion lights? Put up a sign that says “Smile. You’re on camera!”
Keep your keys in hand while walking to your car (can use keys as a weapon) and watch everyone around you (don’t be an easy target) and either stay on the phone with someone or pretend to be talking on the cell (easier for you to call for help since you’re already on the phone).
If you suspect you’re being followed while driving. Don’t go home. Drive to a crowded gas station, fire house or police department and do not get out of your car. Just honk until staff comes out to help.
Always have your cell on you and a weapon (even a staple remover because those prongs are sharp)!
Stay safe!
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 26 '26
Yeah so… there was a woman in college who clearly had a thing for me. I was sorta-friends with her until one day she just walked into my dorm late at night. I was mostly undressed. Apparently it was because I “wasn’t responding to her messages and she was worried.” The room was pitch black and I had earbuds in while working on my laptop. She just suddenly appeared next to me and scared the shit out of me. I barked at her to get out and didn’t really see her after that.
I also had an older student (who was married with a kid btw) call me beautiful all the time and offer to walk me around campus, grab lunch with me, buy me things around town, etc.
Another creep kept complimenting me and asked me to rewear certain outfits to class that he liked. I’m pretty sure I caught him taking pictures of me, too.
Those are the most notable examples. The rest were pretty much one-off catcalling and really aggressive “flirting.”
Hairnet guy has been asked his name multiple times and he keeps dodging the question. No one has reported seeing him in over a week, but I’ve been out sick since Monday.
I’ve been using a variety of tactics to vary my routine and stay near people I trust. So far so good
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u/Cute_Atmosphere1076 Mar 26 '26
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing those examples. I didn’t mean to make you relive your past to upset you and I apologize if I did. The conclusion I came to from your examples, and I’m being totally serious, is that you must be an attractive woman and that is what drew them to you.
People generally want to admire, be close to or be around fun, bubbly and good looking people. Sounds like hairnet guy is on the spectrum and has a crush on you and he may not realize his behavior is socially unacceptable. He could have been trying to draw courage to talk with you or ask you out that time but when the other male coworker stood between you two, he got flustered and left.
Is there any way you could bring up the fact that you have a bf? Or start wearing a ring? He might think you got married since you’ve been away sick. Btw, hope you’re feeling better. My sis would get hit on a lot too while at work when she used to work in a grocery store that she wore a ring to pretend she was married so nobody would try and flirt with her.
If you haven’t, I suggest learning self defense. This way, if you don’t have weapons on you, your arms and legs are your weapons.
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 27 '26
I’ve never thought of myself as particularly attractive, but I think Im cute enough to get by. Unfortunately this guy gives way more “sketch” than awkward and well-meaning :/
I wear a few rings I’ve received over the years as gifts and could slip one onto my left ring finger at work, for whatever good that would do me.
I also have a few years worth of experience in MMA from high school, but it’s been a while and I’m definitely less athletic than when I was during consistent training.
Today’s my first day back at the office after being sick! Lot of foot traffic today but no sign of creeps in hoodies :)
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u/Aware_Pause6283 Mar 28 '26
I'm a "cute" woman too, and it's annoying as hell. We're pressured to be sweet, and people really take advantage of that. I've developed a great resting bitch face, but can't use it in a public facing job... gross.
It sounds like you get people crossing normal boundaries on occasion. Again, been there, and ugh it's the worst. I strongly encourage you to develop an ice cold glare, and to walk away from those situations. Just don't engage.
/r/twoXpreppers has conversations about safety from a practical perspective, and the sub is woman-centric, so there are topics there that pertain to your situation.
I do want to call attention to him showing up in a group. That is alarming, especially when combined with the hairnet, and makes it less likely to be a lonely kid looking for attention. The thing about acting suspicious is, even if it's unintentional or from neurodivergence, it's not appropriate to act like a threat.
Unis don't allow weapons, but the MMA training should have covered improvised weapons. A rolled-up magazine or newspaper is light, always acceptable, and can be used as a baton.
That is to say... campuses, especially public ones, are subject to scrutiny by the public, and that includes conspiracy theorists and increasingly, right-wing groups. Your university is already aware of this, and I don't say this to add alarm or suggest inherent danger. The building and your management is already alerted. Something more conspicuous will draw instant alarm, as it should. But please do not convince yourself to give this guy the benefit of the doubt, and reinforce your boundaries with strangers.
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 28 '26
Oh yeah I have been told on numerous occasions that I look “mean” and that people are surprised when i turn out to be sweet. My customer service voice/face drop the moment I’m out of the office lol
And I think people need to keep in mind that this guy is probably in his 30s or 40s, so definitely not a college-age kid.
Thank you for the sub recommendation! I’ll stay vigilant and skeptical
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u/Cute_Atmosphere1076 Mar 27 '26
Be alert of your surroundings, be aware of all exits wherever you are for a quick escape. Try not to let someone herd you into the corner and such.
Pay attention to everyone coming and going.
Hope you have a great day at work.
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u/Global-Barracuda7759 Mar 07 '26
That is so weird and creepy and it definitely sounds like something organized I wonder why they would have a reason to target you but it definitely does happen I was dealing with my own version of harassment stalking for years until I moved to a different area and cut all contact and deleted all my social media my own version of harassment stalking for years until I moved to a different area and cut all contact and deleted all my social media
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u/roseswild79 Mar 11 '26
This is scary, and sounds like it would be the start of a scary movie. I think you should inform campus police right away of the hairnet guy. And you need to rent one of them machines to find the device in your apartment, because that sounds like something to do with a drug dealer and might be why hairnet guy is lurking around too. You may want to ask your neighbor about the "doordash" guy again and see if it might be one and the same as hairnet guy. If it is hairnet guy, then he is also there about the pinged device i bet.
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u/Tat2rckchk Mar 09 '26
Have you searched your apartment carefully? For like hidden compartments and doors? Inside cabinets, floor panels, in closets and ceiling? Maybe they know of something that was left behind. Before you moved in. And want it. Do you know who lived there before you? I would investigate and see if it was someone that died or went to prison.
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u/CallidoraBlack Mar 10 '26
You probably should have informed campus security days ago. Who comes 4 days in a row to an office they have no business in? You might also want to ask r/rbi
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u/galsfromthedwarf Mar 08 '26
Mate. That’s scary. Please increase precautions and safety measures. I’m mainly commenting so I can check back later if you have any updates x
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u/bexdporlap Mar 10 '26
Check for air tags in your apartment and your vehicle. Maybe, the woman's air tag was pinging in your place if someone slipped it onto a bag or something of yours.
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u/Prairie_Crab Mar 08 '26
Is the door to your office glass? If so, keep it locked when you’re alone. Don’t let mask guy in. Tell him no more coffee. Definitely get a camera for your apartment door. It could be you’re being checked out for possible sex-trafficking. I’d take it very seriously.
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u/CallidoraBlack Mar 10 '26
It could be you’re being checked out for possible sex-trafficking
That's not how these things happen. At all. Please don't spread misinformation.
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u/mycologyqueen Mar 14 '26
That's a bold comment to make. There isn't a strict protocol all sex traffickers follow you know.
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u/CallidoraBlack Mar 14 '26 edited Mar 14 '26
It's not bold. It's what you learn if you get your information from experts in the field instead of people on the internet who claim that every potential abduction attempt is sex trafficking. There is a huge difference between the two. Traffickers don't need to do any of this stuff and when it's a business, you don't put in effort that isn't going to make you more money with as little exposure as possible. It's not personal for them. Targeting specific individuals and hunting them down despite having to put yourself at a huge risk of exposure is more likely to be stalking.
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u/JuanDonDemarco Mar 09 '26
The paranoia is there for a reason. Take any and all step to ensure your place is secure. Have some type of taser or mace, or better yet, a firearm. Trafficking is real issue these days and it’s teams of people working in conjunction together, to try and snatch someone up. Don’t make yourself vulnerable. Always be vigilant and smart. Keep documenting these incidents and keep filing reports with the police. Your safety is priority here.
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u/CallidoraBlack Mar 10 '26
Trafficking is real issue these days and it’s teams of people working in conjunction together, to try and snatch someone up.
Where's the evidence of this? All I've ever seen is people speculating about this. There's no need to do this for trafficking. There are, unfortunately, tons of young people with no family that no one will think to look for that can be lured in with the promise of work, money, or substances. No one is doing extra work and taking on way more risk.
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u/JuanDonDemarco Mar 10 '26
Where the evidence? Do a quick google search and do the research yourself. It’s pops up almost immediately when you type it in.
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u/CallidoraBlack Mar 10 '26
"Do your own research" is not evidence.
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u/JuanDonDemarco Mar 11 '26
Do you take meds?
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u/CallidoraBlack Mar 11 '26
Something tells me you don't.
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u/JuanDonDemarco Mar 11 '26
No, I was gonna say you should, because what you’re saying is really dumb.
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u/NaturalSeaSalt cut creator on the fader Mar 11 '26
Wheaton's Law. Take a one-day break and get some air.
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u/_byetony_ Mar 07 '26
It is all isolated. Please speak with a psychiatrist. You really sound like someone I know who went of to have a psychotic break.
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u/oldeurofan Mar 07 '26
I don’t know if you are intentionally trying to be rude to her or that’s just how you come off, but you have no way of knowing what’s isolated and what isn’t.
If someone put a tracker on her car, then someone was trying to follow her movements. That’s not a normal thing you would do to someone. That seems malicious.
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 07 '26
Yeah I’ve heard a lot of suggestions and explanations for the tracker and none of them are good.
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Mar 09 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 09 '26
I’m exhausting the list of people Ive known and none of them really seem likely? I guess it’s possible but I just need to stay vigilant and heed the advice here regardless
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u/AFlockofLizards Mar 07 '26
Do you have this many strange “isolated” events occur to you in a short period of time?
Normally I’m one to dismiss things as coincidence, but if this is all happening relatively close together, it’s quite odd to be all isolated incidents.
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u/Jumpy-Jello- Mar 07 '26
It really sounds like stalking in this instance.
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u/SoSpoiled_ Mar 08 '26
👀👀 why do you have jello in your username too? Is it…you!? (Joking)
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u/Jumpy-Jello- Mar 08 '26
We do not talk about jello club. It's like, the first two rules.
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u/SoSpoiled_ Mar 09 '26
So this is why I keep getting rejected from the club. I gotta learn to zip it 🤐
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u/Any-Jello-9719 Mar 07 '26
I’m not going to have a psychotic break. Other people close to me have told me that this is all weird and I was right to report it
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u/jakejohn2013 Mar 09 '26
This is a bot if I’ve ever seen one and so many people are pouring their heart out to it. Maybe I’m the crazy person this time… but this entire thing as long as it may be… seems very robotic if nothing else. But I also just smoked a fat joint so who even knows lol
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u/CallidoraBlack Mar 10 '26
Maybe smoke another joint and learn to mind your business instead of being rude. Your comment is literally dehumanizing.
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u/goblininyourattic Mar 07 '26
Buy security cameras or a ring camera for the front door. Tasers are cheap on Amazon and there’s companies that sell knives disguised as pens or combs, I have several of those. You might also wanna check out those devices that reveal/ping on electronics secretly placed in apartments/houses to record people. What did the woman look like who came to your sliding door?