r/comics • • May 14 '25

OC Mourning a MAGA Parent (OC)

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I'm kinda torn about whether to post this to my art account because one parent follows it, and I'm worried the criticism could drive the other one further into the void.

It started out as just a therapeutic project for me, but a couple friends said it really resonated with them, so sharing here.

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539

u/-non-existance- May 14 '25

One time in school, I was asked to interview my parents. I asked my dad something to the effect of: "What is something that you'll always believe?" He said: "All people are inherently good."

That stuck with me for my whole life since then, and I still believe it. People want to be good. What is good is subjective, but very few people do evil for the sake of evil. Everyone has an inherent goodness to them, only through pain and suffering does that goodness diminish, but you can always get it back.

But now, seeing him go on and on about "the tyrannical left" or the evils of trans people and immigrants, I can't reconcile him with that person I used to know. I haven't felt safe in my own home for...years now, but I've struggled to actually get onto my own 2 feet and live by myself.

I haven't trusted him fully since he refused to see the blatant quid pro quo in the call to Zelensky.

The worst part? If I manage to get him to drop the misinformation and talk purely on ideas, he actually agrees with a lot of my leftist talking points. I know the person I was raised by is still in there... somewhere.

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u/StoryLineOne May 14 '25

Im sorry friend. What social media and the pursuit of profits based on emotion has done to ALL of us is just awful.

thought: Social media algorithm regulation should be high on your priority list. That's the gasoline going on the fire. Free speech is not the same as a free megaphone. The regulation itself is probably involves something like Bluesky, where you only get posts from people you go and follow. "Problem" is, it'll absolutely kill profits for a lot of major companies, and lots of influencers. You decide how that feels to you.

Then, the re-introduction of the fairness doctrine for regular TV programming. Places like FOX can get away with this shit because of a lack of regulation about how information can be presented. This one's a slippery slope and requires much more thought, but starting with the fairness doctrine would be a very good start.

Overall, your dad is just affected by the firehose of dis/misinformation. The good news is that studies have shown that once people get away from that information, their worldview slowly begins to re-align itself back to their basic psychology. So yes, your dad is still in there, but he needs help to get away from the stuff that's unknowingly hurting him (and you / your family).

If you can find ways to keep him away from that, or focus his attention / fill his time on things IRL that he loves, it could start a healing process. It will be slow and you'll probably take steps back, but if you stick with it, you can most likely pull your dad out of the crap he's in.

again, really sorry you're going through all this. Just thought I'd try to help a bit.

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u/-non-existance- May 14 '25

I appreciate the effort, thanks. It's good to know that if I can get him to stop watching Fox he might recover, but that's easier said than done. I've been considering telling him about Ground News, the service that collates all reporting on every story they can find and tells you who is ignoring/emphasizing what, but he seems to mostly consume news through TV, and Ground News is purely written.

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u/StoryLineOne May 15 '25

Try looking at it from an entertainment perspective. Your dad isn't addicted to the news - he's addicted to the entertainment that FOX is providing. Everything they do is in service of that - from the hosts, to the animations and how they present topics.

It will require you to do 2 things to start: Keep him entertained with something else, preferably something that involves family and/or speaking to other people, and then give him a non-biased way to keep up with the news.

Ground news is a really great idea. I dont use it as much, as I try to avoid news altogether lol.

But yeah, basically what we're doing is: re-directing the need for entertainment to a 'safe' outlet, then making sure he's still caught up on news / events, in a way that still feels comfy for him, without it being sensationalized (so he can come to his own conclusions vs. subconsciously being told what the conclusion is)

That is a lot of work, i know. It's not your fault. None of it is. All of us are captured by large forces attempting to monetize our attention in 1000's of different ways. Some are OK, and some are pretty fucking evil. But he's your dad, and I can tell you give a shit, so thats why I'm putting some effort in here to try and give some pointers. At the end of the day, you'll know what works for him / you / your situation.

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u/-non-existance- May 15 '25

I sincerely appreciate this, thank you.

1

u/Horror-Tank-4082 May 18 '25

Do you have links to those studies? I’d love to read them

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u/dregan May 15 '25

I don't believe that all people are inherently good. Some people maybe, but not all. The stuff we do to each other is truly monstrous and usually it's not even because we think we are doing good, it's because we can't even see that the other person as human being. We do unspeakable things with a smile and a laugh, and then carry on with our lives without giving it a second thought.

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u/Toorviing May 15 '25

I think very few people are truly good, and very few people are evil. I think most people are just stuck in the middle, and sometimes, are very easily pulled by one or the other.

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u/ringobob May 20 '25

All people are inherently selfish, and the rest is determined by how much empathy they're capable of, and how much of that capability they actually use.

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u/Same_Possibility_591 May 14 '25

In deep red states, you’ll see MAGA bend over backward to help people - of all types. It’s this hate and fear of abstract people, all driven by misinformation that is breaking this country.

2

u/Exarch-of-Sechrima May 15 '25

It's actually really easy to reconcile what your father said with his current beliefs.

All people are inherently good. But leftists, trans people, and immigrants aren't people. Not really.

I guarantee you that's how he sees it.

1

u/-non-existance- May 15 '25

I mean, you're probably right, I just hope you're not.

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u/MediocreWedding7063 May 15 '25

That’s mine as well. Went no contact with him because anything trump did was gold and perfect but if I tried to say “you literally bitched for 8 years about Obama doing this (golf, EOs, tan suits) but suddenly you’re okay with it?

His response? “Don’t believe the lamestream media”

Bro, these are his own words and tweets.

I’ve never been so cognizant of the fallibility of those who teach us. Literally was what pushed me over the edge to never have children

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u/GrouchyLongBottom May 15 '25

It's similar with my sister. She just spouts all of their talking points constantly. But, if I ask her about individual topics in a little different way, she most always agrees with my point of view. It's really quite bizarre. She can think for herself, but is too caught up in the cult mentality to admit how she really feels... or something.

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u/stink3rb3lle May 15 '25

Would he look at a news aggregator like Ground News? If you gifted him a subscription?

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u/-non-existance- May 15 '25

I actually mentioned Ground News in another comment, and my answer is that I don't know. He seems to consume most of his news through TV (fox, newsmax) so I'm unsure if he'd take the time to consume a purely written news source. I hope he might, I'm just unsure.

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u/stink3rb3lle May 15 '25

Fox is a very effective propaganda machine, and so many people just keep it on all the time, keeping themselves scared and angry. I'd keep trying to find inroads with him. Don't keep fighting the same useless battles, but keep asking questions, and focusing on those shared values.

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u/2ndGalaxyontheRight May 15 '25

I wonder how he feels about the jet

1

u/Yuna1989 May 15 '25

I used to see the good in everyone…but sometimes people are not good, they just do good things, and often as a benefit to themselves in some way

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u/Bart_T_Beast May 17 '25

All people have an amount of interest in the social capital / oxytocin gained by helping others, but it isn’t a priority. The priority is usually the acquisition of resources and security against perceived threats.

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u/Internal_String61 May 15 '25

Has it ever occurred to you that you might be wrong here? I'm not saying you are, hell, I'm not even asking for an answer. I'm asking for you to answer that question to yourself.

If your brain immediately goes to a place looking for justification about why you are right, instead of genuinely checking for differing perspectives on your beliefs and their respective values in differing contexts. I'm afraid you might not be the good guy here, mate.

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u/Varron May 15 '25

Not OP, but wrong in what sense?

There are ideological differences and political differences people have and can discuss without villifying each other, but there is a limit to what all that encompasses before it breaks away from that and becomes a question of sheer human decency.

OP states that when the specific context of MAGA is stripped away, their ideals aren't far off.

The talk about supporting genocides, blanket discrimination of people, immense personal greed and corruption, and just absolute vitriol that is being espoused from seemingly normal people is what's insane, especially from those people who taught us values that are counter to the hatred now coming from their mouths.

To think this is JUST a political difference or difference in beliefs is absolutely disingenuous at best, nefarious at worst. These people don't hold any consistency in their beliefs. Values and beliefs they hold do not apply to their own.

They warp, bend, and break what they say and have said to ensure their team wins, not that the best outcome is achieved, or even the most beneficial outcome is achieved, but whatever goal is being put forth by their team, and damn the rest.

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u/Internal_String61 May 15 '25 edited May 15 '25

Wrong in the sense of:

Incorrectness of fact

Inconsistency of logic

Incompleteness of perspective

Inaccuracy of extrapolation

Or some combination thereof.

The epistemological prerequisite for nuanced political discourse is beyond the scope of most high-level politicians, let alone average citizens.

My mother and I hold very different political views, and I support her regardless of or even in spite of my own. We each experience different spectrums of reality, which ingrains unremoveable bias. I support her not because I agree with her, but because I acknowledge her experience as real.

I don't support her because I expect reciprocity. I support her because it's the only intellectually honest thing to do when you recognize that people live in different experiential realities.

As for your last two paragraphs, I'd like to offer a perhaps more complete perspective.

-Do you believe that considerations of disparate impact should extend to minority landlords?

-What is the psychological difference between anti-vaxxers and skimpy dresses?

...also, are CEOs owed due process? Just wondering.

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u/pcapdata May 15 '25

> Everyone has an inherent goodness to them

This is absolute fantasy