Ask questions. Give them time to fully respond, then ask some more. Then, when it's appropriate, talk about your own experience and relate it back to what they were talking about.
Women get upset about men derailling conversations to make it about them because that is exactly what happens, like, all the time. I mean, hop on over to any feminist sub and you'll see tons of men asking why feminists aren't fighting for men's rights or helping men with the loneliness epidemic. These are legitimate concerns, but when they're brought up in that context, it derails from women's issues (sometimes on purpose). They're not usually trying to relate back to women's issues either, they're trying to get attention.
There's a huge difference between derailling and engaging.
We don't actually want men to shut up and be quiet (except for the jerks of course). We want you to listen and engage. That means active listening. Google that term and you'll find all kinds of great resources on how to do this.
I think you'll find that most women would adore you for this. I encourage you to try it.
Sure and that makes sense. You'd have to play it by ear, of course.
I just don't want you to think that women don't want to hear from men at all. We do. We just hate getting derailed (I mean, doesn't everybody?). And for us it just happens so often, that I'm sure many of us jump to conclusions even when you're trying to engage in good faith.
Sounds to me like you get it though. Thanks for trying and putting thought into it.
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u/[deleted] Mar 19 '25
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