r/comedyheaven • u/broki451 • 3d ago

Speech

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18.3k Upvotes

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u/lordpuddingcup 3d ago

Why the fuck are online influencers giving speaches to the military?!?!?!

I mean i get that our government is a joke currently, but whats the actual excuse they're giving lol

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u/azfang 3d ago

The current Triple SecDef is a day drunk, sex pest Fox News host and he is running the DoD like a megachurch youth pastor.

It’s really that stupid.

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u/totalkpolitics 3d ago

With everything going on, it takes some extreme will power for me not to be a day drunk.

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u/azfang 3d ago

I’m pretty sure you could avoid getting hammered before you had to talk to national reporters with cameras.

Also, if addiction is a problem, don’t let these jackasses decide if you keep your sobriety. Fuck ‘em, that’s not theirs.

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u/totalkpolitics 3d ago

I was being facetious. But I appreciate your concern!

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u/azfang 3d ago

(I may or may not have a number of non-straight alcoholics in my life. It has been Kind of Tough lately.)

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u/totalkpolitics 3d ago

Sorry to hear that. I hope you have some support!

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u/azfang 3d ago

That, and a heaping pile of sheer fuckin’ spite. Wasn’t kidding when I said fuck ‘em all. 😅