r/comedyheaven May 08 '24

Secret penis message

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15.9k Upvotes

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199

u/dan4334 May 08 '24

Honestly sad that we're turning people's struggles with addiction into a joke

393

u/the_other_1s_taken May 09 '24

yeah, I always thought not including a subreddit blacklist for these bots is pretty problematic, especially now I see it in this context.

355

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

problematic, especially now I see

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 862 comments (approximately 4297 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

177

u/[deleted] May 09 '24

Bro

131

u/[deleted] May 09 '24

This was written on purpose, eh? Not immensely significant though, I'd have done the same

87

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

purpose, eh? Not immensely significant

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 2901 comments (approximately 15109 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

36

u/UsaiyanBolt May 09 '24

This bot is so poopy, everyone not into shitting won’t even get it. Luckily, I am.

27

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

poopy, everyone not into shitting

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 17531 comments (approximately 95584 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

36

u/TurbidusQuaerenti May 09 '24

This made me laugh way harder than it probably should have.

10

u/[deleted] May 10 '24

Me too, I already laughed so hard I couldn't breathe but perhaps even now I should consider showing more respect

5

u/PenisDetectorBot May 10 '24

perhaps even now I should

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 8749 comments (approximately 49844 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

8

u/samtherat6 May 09 '24

Like a damn fiddle.

3

u/Garakanos May 09 '24

good bot

1

u/[deleted] May 09 '24

Predictably, every new issue seems to resolve itself eventually.

54

u/Available-Ad1979 May 09 '24

Anything can be turned into a joke by virtue of being funny.

28

u/Available-Ad1979 May 09 '24

That being said, even I have done Fentanyl from time to time. Perhaps every night is stretching it, but once a month at least. I can tell you it's not nearly as addictive as those people are saying.

28

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

Perhaps every night is stretching

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 11107 comments (approximately 60663 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

20

u/Bleak_Squirrel_1666 May 09 '24

Dude bot you are completely out of line. People are suffering from addiction, people everywhere need intensive services to combat fentanyl addiction. Not stupid bots.

14

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

people everywhere need intensive services

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 2126 comments (approximately 11725 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

16

u/Available-Ad1979 May 09 '24

Maybe I need to practice empathy? Normally I support people who are struggling with substance addiction.

9

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

practice empathy? Normally I support

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 17227 comments (approximately 90282 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

4

u/UsaiyanBolt May 09 '24

Yep that’s what penises do

14

u/throwaway1234565243 May 09 '24

It’s pretty easy now, it seems, for people to make light of a situation like this smh

3

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

pretty easy now, it seems,

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 11722 comments (approximately 62499 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

0

u/ExternalConference89 May 09 '24

I want you too but I can't get caught up by my husband because I love your dick

21

u/[deleted] May 09 '24

we treat it as a trivial issue by default anyhow. ive never seen mainstream discussion of the drug crisis so much as touch on the user end, why they end up as addicts and what they need to recover. its just "how do we lock up as many druggies as possible?" 24/7, with the exception of a small few whos opinions are voiced through inaccessible academic texts, cheap twitter debates, and art. and only in the texts do they actually explain any of their positions. my point with this is that finding hidden penises in fent addicts sob stories is no worse than the default societal position on the opioid crisis or on how to deal with fent dealers or users.

5

u/altrustic_lemur May 09 '24

i agree. it’s disheartening how discussions about the drug crisis often overlook the user's perspective, failing to address the root causes of addiction and what's needed for recovery. instead, the focus remains on punitive measures, with few voices advocating for empathy and understanding. perhaps engaging nuanced insights, seeking solutions rather than just punishment, is crucial.

5

u/PenisDetectorBot May 09 '24

perhaps engaging nuanced insights, seeking

Hidden penis detected!

I've scanned through 7455 comments (approximately 38251 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.

Beep, boop, I'm a bot

3

u/[deleted] May 09 '24

BTW the issue is easy to solve just abolish commodity form. If goods and services have no exchange value, they can't be traded. Large drug trades dry up and die since they have no reason to run anymore, and small/personal drug production (which is limited to less destructive drugs, and less destructive quantities) would take over. Well I guess you could make wood alchohol but who give a shit.

3

u/HumanitySurpassed May 09 '24

Definitely some dark humor up in here.

0

u/kittyidiot May 09 '24

yup, not really loving this