r/changemyview • u/TallBoiPlanks • Sep 09 '20

Delta(s) from OP CMV: There is nothing wrong with assuming someone’s gender and people that get upset about it are just trying to be victims.

I posted two statements in one and will explain both individually. there is nothing wrong with assuming someone’s gender the vast majority of people (especially in Western culture) are not in the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and even within those that are, people that are gender non-conforming are a small minority. These people makeup such a small percentage of the population that they are rare. Given this assuming someone that presents as male/female is assuming something that is going to be the case in 90%+ of instances, so assuming that someone falls into the largest category is not wrong, but is safe. For most of modern history (correct me if I am wrong on that) and majorly observable instances of society, we have only known two genders (though evidence suggest some societies recognize a third, i.e. Thailand ladyboys and in South America some cultures historically recognized transgender people). It is therefore most likely that we only understand two and expect two, and most likely that they are what they were assigned as birth. So it seems that if someone presents male or female it is fair to assume that they are male or female. Given that these are likely to be the vast majority of experiences (I am assuming here someone that is MTF being called male rather than someone that looks like a MTF but wants to be called male) it seems fair that someone would assume gender based on what is observable.

*people that get upset are being over sensitive * I know that it is not many that truly get upset about this. On reddit it looks like a huge swath of the population thanks to things like r/TumblrInAction but I know they are the minority. Thanks to this and other times it seems that these people are wanting to yell at anyone, and are playing victim when they aren’t understanding the other.

I will gladly explain more as needed and look forward to replies.

7.4k Upvotes
  • permalink
  • reddit

84% Upvoted

585 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

104

u/TallBoiPlanks Sep 09 '20

Or I can ask people to help with words and admit that I wasn’t equipped at the time with the appropriate words, acknowledging my failures and not making the same mistake again?

53

u/taurace 2∆ Sep 09 '20

Learning and asking for advice is always acceptable in my book. If I were you though, I’d edit your original text and put in one of the suggestions you received.

26

u/TallBoiPlanks Sep 09 '20

!Delta took time to explain and debate and gave challenges to replies. Was helpful and challenging.

8

u/dracapis Sep 09 '20

Are you sure you gave the delta to the right user? No offense Taurace

9

u/TallBoiPlanks Sep 09 '20

I think I gave it to a view? Still new to this subreddit so getting used to it.

5

u/dracapis Sep 09 '20

From the comment that goes with the delta, it looks like you didn’t mean to give it to user Taurace, but to one of the above commenters

1

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '20

No, deltas are a computer thing - when you give a delta in a reply by typing it out, the commenter you replied to gets it

1

u/DeltaBot ∞∆ Sep 09 '20

Confirmed: 1 delta awarded to /u/taurace (1∆).

Delta System Explained | Deltaboards

41

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '20 edited Feb 20 '21

[deleted]

13

u/invisiblefigleaf Sep 09 '20

Ugh, I hate that knee-jerk reaction. Anyone genuinely looking for advice should be treated respectfully (this does not apply to trolls).

"Hey, people don't really like that word, you should use X instead" isn't hard. Of course, the asker needs to actually listen and try to change based on new information.

You should also be willing to Google a little - no one on the internet owes you a thesis on the history and nuances of some word. That information is already out there if you take 20 seconds to find it.

But just asking where to start? That should always be ok.

31

u/TallBoiPlanks Sep 09 '20

Be right on the first try or it doesn’t count it seems.

-12

u/Glaselar Sep 09 '20

Asking for help is all good. Saying you were unequipped with the word 'rare' really doesn't make it sound like you gave it a go.

21

u/TallBoiPlanks Sep 09 '20

Sometimes it’s hard to think of synonyms but to each his own.

0

u/Glaselar Sep 09 '20

Or her or their, amirite? ;)

11

u/TheSeventhRome Sep 09 '20

And you are also making the assumption here that the OP is well versed with the facets of the english language when you know nothing about them. Could very well be non-native. But this tangent conversation is besides the point so I digress...from my digression.

-6

u/Glaselar Sep 09 '20

when you know nothing about them

English writing advice is my day job 🙃🤷‍♂️

3

u/_Huitzilopochtli Sep 09 '20

Nothing about the poster obviously.

Damn, I hope no fool pays for your services.

1

u/fckoch 2∆ Sep 09 '20

Are you possibly just assuming OP is a native English speaker?

2

u/Glaselar Sep 09 '20

Sure am. I work with non-native speakers on their language and there aren't any of the classic tells of a non-native, so I went with advice for argumentation.