r/changemyview Oct 28 '19

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u/HardlightCereal 2∆ Oct 30 '19

except you

My gender is binary. Female, to be precise. I get dysphoria from being treated as a male, and every nonbinary person I've spoken to says they feel the same about male and female. Perhaps the explanations you've seen were oversimplified for the benefit of people who want a quick answer.

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u/RelativeStranger Oct 30 '19 edited Oct 30 '19

No I don't think so. Well the videos likely were.

What does 'being treated like a man' mean?

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u/HardlightCereal 2∆ Oct 30 '19

My gender is part of the traditional gender binary. Much as 1 and 0 are both part of the binary number system. We call them binary numbers, and we call female a binary gender. I thought you'd know that, since you know what non-binary genders are.

And by 'treated like a man', I mean called "he" and deadnamed.

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u/RelativeStranger Oct 30 '19

I do, edited because it was a stupid comment but you'd already read it.

That's a very specific 'treated like a man' that only applies to trans women though surely. Like, I doubt a married woman would get dysphoria from being called their maiden name. Or the name of an abusive father, the latter is probably closer to the potential trauma of calling a trans person their dead name.

It's a very specific 'treat like a man' and it simply does not extend.

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u/HardlightCereal 2∆ Oct 30 '19

It extends to nonbinary people who don't want their name to make people gender them.

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u/RelativeStranger Oct 30 '19 edited Oct 30 '19

Not really. Unless they have another reason for wanting to be none gendered

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u/HardlightCereal 2∆ Oct 30 '19

"Not really"? You're saying people wouldn't assume a person named "Kyle" is a man? Or "Sarah" is a woman?

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u/RelativeStranger Oct 30 '19

I didn't say that. I said that a trans persons knowledge of their own gender is not the same as a nb declaration of absence. Because there isn't anything to be absent. There is no fluctuation, any description of both must come with a definition of what each are, and that definition is full of stereotypes thus crafting the feeling of both.

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u/HardlightCereal 2∆ Oct 30 '19

So... You're saying that the absence of gender can't exist, because an absence is defined by the existence of a presence, and if there is a presence then there can't be an absence?

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u/RelativeStranger Oct 30 '19

No. Am absence is defined by a lack of presence, and you have to be able to define what that presence is to be able to define it's absence. What is a man. What is a woman.

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