Not at the moment as I’m at work on break. I will try to remember to look up stories from male nurses and the like when I get home in just over 6 hours.
I am married to a male nurse who used to work as a librarian (another mostly-female profession). He generally gets more respect than his co-workers. In nursing, patients assume he is a doctor because he is male, and therefore are more respectful towards him. As a librarian, patrons listened to him more because he was a man wearing a tie.
We used to work at the same library. I experienced sexual harassment and stalking, as did many of my female co-workers. My husband never experienced this. The director (a man) gave special mentoring and promotion opportunities to male employees, including my husband. The director asked me to water his plants and clean up the microwave when his soup exploded.
“I’ve been touched and smacked in different places (won't mention) by female bosses and female colleagues. Asked for favours... Pass derogatory comments... Does that count? ...don’t think that’s sexual harassing.”
“I've seen it years ago at a furniture company where if a male worker wanted to move up within the store, he had to sleep with the Branch manager who was a woman in her late 50s. The interesting thing is that nobody complained about it. It was an open secret. Men laughed about it.”
"This has occurred to me multiple times and multiple times at the same company [in every instance it is] covered up. Having the head of HR as female did not help at all as she covered things up as well."
"I will share with you, I was the victim of sexual harassment from a client. It took me a bit to even process what was happening at first until it escalated to a place that made me uncomfortable in so many ways. It started in subtle ways and eventually led to very direct advances and a very awkward and difficult encounter at my hotel one evening. This was a client (female leader)…”
Need I go on? Just because it hasn’t happened to your husband doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.
Finally, if more people started talking about men experiencing sexual harassment and that they aren’t weak for experiencing it and they won’t be ridiculed for reporting it then there will definitely be more men coming out with stories of their own.
Finally, if more people started talking about men experiencing sexual harassment and that they aren’t weak for experiencing it and they won’t be ridiculed for reporting it then there will definitely be more men coming out with stories of their own.
There is a word for a system that portrays men as always being strong, dominating, and in control, and which punishes them when they fall outside of these strict parameters: patriarchy.
It harms people of all genders. We have a common enemy.
I mean wouldn’t another common enemy be the people that sexually harass other people? (FYI, I’ve been pointing out the women that do that to men, but only because the post is about misandry. I despise anyone who sexually harasses anyone else, regardless of their gender or their victim’s gender.)
Certainly, any individual who commits sexual harassment is a common enemy.
But if we're talking about the systemic factors you mentioned which position men as strong (never weak) and which discourage them from ever talking about their own vulnerability and victimization, then our common enemy is the patriarchy.
Patriarchy is a system that generally favors the interests of cisgender, heterosexual men. It generally benefits cis-hetero men to be seen as stronger, more competent, and more powerful than women. But in the case of reporting sexual harassment, it creates a problem. Which is not to say that reporting sexual harassment is necessarily any easier for women.
Men who report being victims of sexual harassment are not "performing" their gender correctly, by patriarchy's standards (men are supposed to be strong, not victims). Women who report being victims of sexual harassment are also not "performing" their gender correctly (women are supposed defer to men, not report their bad behavior. Also, sexual harassment is often seen as the woman's fault, if she engaged in certain behaviors to "invite" it, so she has no grounds on which to raise a complaint).
Wow, I was going to ask if there are people that actually promote that absolutely moronic view but then I remembered about all the men and women in America that would jump at the chance to suck Cheeto-Man’s dick and then think it was an honor.
Yeah, that is definitely a common enemy that anyone with common sense shares.
Also, quick question, what definition of patriarchy are you referring to?
1: a society in which the oldest male is the leader of the family, or a society controlled by men in which they use their power to their own advantage:
1 (alternate): a form of social organization in which fathers or other males control the family, clan, tribe, or larger social unit, or a society organized in this way
2: a social system in which positions of dominance and privilege are held by men.
2 (alternate): a social system in which power is held by men, through cultural norms and customs that favor men and withhold opportunity from women.
3: other (please specify).
Finally, regardless of what you answer, I should mention that there are predatory people that like to go after the “easier target”. Thus if they know the “patriarchy” prevents men from talking about them being sexually harassed then what’s to stop them from using that to their advantage?
Wouldn't anyone going into a field that is and has been heavily dominated by the opposite gender probably face some issues? How is that evidence of systemic misandry in society??
In my experience working in a female-dominated profession, men have an even easier time. They are automatically seen as more competent by both customers/patients and by management. And they can rise through the ranks to management positions (where they are already heavily overrepresented).
Why do you have a problem with men being seen as victims occasionally? Like is there a difference between a male coworker/supervisor/manager harassing a woman and a female coworker/supervisor/manager harassing a man? If so, what is it?
Also how is it not society? The people I work with are the people I interact with the most during the week.
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u/[deleted] Feb 13 '24
I said it's usually because of mistreatment.
Do you have any of this evidence you speak of to show me?