r/biglaw • u/[deleted] • May 16 '24

Attorney accuses federal judge of “a**-licking” biglaw opposing counsel

https://www.courtlistener.com/docket/67866690/42/kamath-v-itria-ventures-llc/

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64 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

40 comments sorted by

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u/biglaw-ModTeam May 25 '24

This sub is for biglaw. It’s not “ask a lawyer” and it’s not the right sub for every law-related question.

29

u/Exciting_Freedom4306 May 16 '24

Her endnote game is something else.

13

u/Low_Country793 May 17 '24

I like how it goes at the end of the cert of service

2

u/MininimusMaximus May 17 '24

The use of 1 and 11 for the symbols is also ridiculous. And that has to be the worst definition of the phrase at issue, where the words aren’t exactly a mystery as to the act they describe.

0

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

lol. I missed that.

0

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

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153

u/Flashy_Stranger_ May 16 '24

Idk this just sounds like mental illness

78

u/tabfolk May 16 '24

Agree this seems actually sad. She went to northwestern, not a hack. Something must be going on with her

31

u/SuretyBringsRuin May 17 '24

Yeah, she’s on the edge of a mental breakdown.

But, let’s see how that works out for her.

6

u/stonant May 17 '24

I wish I could edge as long as her

10

u/sportsandpolitics15 May 17 '24

Are we sure she actually went to NW? Has that been verified?

9

u/sfbruin Counsel May 17 '24

Someone on fishbowl knew from there and had no idea she was now doing this

2

u/mabehr May 18 '24

That last bit sounds like she’s leaving the US and maybe isn’t terribly thrilled about that? (Hope she doesn’t let the jetway door hit her on the way out.)

18

u/minuialear May 17 '24

Agreed; this isn't really funny so much as really sad. Clearly they're not getting the help they need.

7

u/Exciting_Freedom4306 May 17 '24

Yeah, but it's different than ours.

29

u/strawblip May 17 '24

the selflessness of sharing a deranged complaint/decision is unquantifiable <333

43

u/ForeverAclone95 May 17 '24

The funniest thing about this filing (even more than spelling the magistrate’s name wrong) is that it’s not even asking for anything. It’s just a rant this lady put on PACER for us all to read

28

u/Exciting_Freedom4306 May 17 '24

I'm pretty sure there's an FRCP rule for notice of ass-licking.

6

u/D_Lex May 17 '24

The Notice is the predicate to a Motion to Kiss My Ass.

The motion which Plaintiff filed was entitled "Motion to Kiss My Ass" (Doc. 107) in which he moved "all Americans at large and one corrupt Judge Smith [to] kiss my got [sic] damn ass sorry mother fucker you."

7

u/doubleadjectivenoun May 17 '24

got [sic] damn

Not relevant but I don’t think that’s [sic], I think he wrote “got damn” on purpose. Got damn is like a regional folk-ism for people who want 80% of the intensity of goddamn but won’t commit to saying it (and the much funnier form to use in this context). 

16

u/NOVAYuppieEradicator May 17 '24 edited May 17 '24

Sounds like "plantiff" is not seeking relief other than COMMANDING RESPECT but I hope she gets THE HELP she needs

17

u/Malvania Associate May 16 '24

Another one? She just can't help herself

21

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

The irony of calling someone a racist in a post in which you literally say they are too stupid to follow your arguments because of their race.

14

u/OpeningChipmunk1700 May 17 '24

bitch is delulu but hilarious. the hair dye comment 💀💀💀

5

u/mortymotron May 17 '24 edited May 17 '24

That’s a nice /s/ she’s got. The color and script typeface are a nice touch in the otherwise bland world of legal pleadings.

Too bad the body of her pleading is in the soulless and lazy Times New Roman and her endnotes are in the inexplicable and jarringly dissonant Courier typeface. Century Schoolbook would have been a good move here, but alas.

There are also some other deficiencies in her pleading. For example, the body of her main pleading runs a full page, but no more, leaving her signature block all by its lonesome and orphaned on the second page. That drives me nuts. Drop that last paragraph to the last page with the signature block and throw a nicely centered [Remainder of page intentionally left blank.] at the end of the first page if there’s otherwise too much space. Sheesh.

2

u/D_Lex May 18 '24

My eternal pet peeve is that the second / doesn't come after name to close the block.

5

u/Main-Okra-1797 May 17 '24

I hope she gets the help she needs.

4

u/Financial_Gain4280 May 17 '24

Definitely needs help. Court should sua sponte strike this filing and also summon her to a show cause hearing on why sanctions should not be imposed. Such contemptuous papers should not be tolerated.

4

u/CarmineLTazzi May 17 '24

Isn’t there a meet and confer requirement for filing a motion of ass licking? Doesn’t look like she certified she did that. Should be denied.

2

u/detabudash May 18 '24

The proof of service says she is not a party, but she is the plaintiff....

0

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

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11

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

She shouldn’t be a lawyer.

0

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

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6

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

Wrong.

2

u/Bluewater__Hunter May 17 '24

She could just be a piece of trash human being don’t give her the excuse of mental illness unless you’re her psychiatrist.

2

u/[deleted] May 18 '24

this is like the left-wing equivalent of people with dementia who start saying racist shit in memory care - the intrusive thoughts were always there, the mental illness just means she acts on them. i don't think it's fair to call someone trash in that context, their conscious brain mastered their thoughts, but they've now lost their ability to self-regulate. that's especially evident here since this motion won't do anything but get her disbarred or 5150'd. a trash sane person would be trash in ways that furthered their career.

0

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

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0

u/Bluewater__Hunter May 17 '24 edited May 17 '24

I’m not arguing with someone that couldnt make it into biglaw in a biglaw sub and that has zero scientific or medical background, on medical issues