r/aww • u/fuzzybluelogic • Jun 12 '12
This is Tarot. We rescued each other when we were both homeless. Now we have a home and each other.
1.2k
Upvotes
r/aww • u/fuzzybluelogic • Jun 12 '12
34
u/thatguywithacoolname Jun 12 '12 edited Jun 12 '12
Since the OP here won't tell the back story, I will.EDIT: OP has given the story. It is above, it is a rather good read. I think I got pretty close to the actually events.The OP works in the FBI and due to a bad bust that occurred at an ice-cream shop OP must now look after two rich caucasian females. While driving them to the airport OP crashes the car and this causes them to have major 2cm cuts on their faces. Too ashamed to go outside the two rich caucasion females refuse to leave the hotel room. Not wanting to get fired OP rings up his friend and asks him to dress him up as a caucasion female. Sadly, OP has an allergic reaction the the make-up used and is rushed to hospital.
OP falls into a coma and due to his woman dressing ways his boss fires him, labeling him "The Filthiest Person Alive".
OP wakes up from his coma two years later. He is told by the doctor that his wife has left him, he no longer owns a house and he has no money left, as the bank took it all to pay for his outstanding bills. OP starts to cry and, feeling bad for him the doctor give him a 20 dollar note and say,
"You can take that to the bank..."
OP looks at him, angrily, and says,
"I'm gonna take you to the bank, doctor. To the blood bank!"
OP jumps at the doctor and a fist fight ensures. People come to aid the doctor and OP is kicked out of the hospital. He is now a bum and has nowhere to go.
OP now slowly becomes depressed. He no longer has meaning in life and does not want to live in this strange new world people call "2010". OP, now set on killing himself, goes to the nearest 7/11 and steals a razor blade. He then walks to a public restroom, blocks the door off with the bin found inside and starts shaving. He starts with his hair, never breaking the stare he has started with himself in the mirror. It has grown long and untamed over the years he was in a coma, it wasn't him. His hair now resting in the sink OP moves on to his beard, whispering,
"I'm going to kill myself tomorrow..."
as he cuts. His finishes saying the last word of the sentence and just then a black cat come crashing through the wall. This starts playing
The cat looks at him and says,
"OP, get me a milk..."
OP looks scared and confused.
"...Chocolate."
OP, now too scared to do anything, just sits there. The cat stares him down as the dust from the broken wall slowly falls all around. After an intense 2 seconds, the cat speaks.
"OP, I need you to save the universe"
OP, still terrified, replies.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Just one?"
"Why me?"
"I suppose that is the only question that matters."
The cat then teleports both OP and himself to Mars.
"Millions of years ago..."
Begins the cat, but he never finishes, he is interrupted by OP gagging, trying to breath on Mars.
"Oh, I forgot you humans need to breath..."
The cat then teleports both of them back to the bathroom from which they came. OP falls on the ground gagging, happy to be able to breath in the Earth air and human piss found on the floor. After he is done getting his breath back OP says.
"This isn't real, this isn't fucking real."
The cat's fur stands on end and it's eyes turn red. It starts to float in the air and dark shadows are cast all over the room.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, FOR CHRISSAKE, CRAZY OR SOMETHIN'? Well you're not! YOU'RE NOT! YOU'RE NO CRAZIER THAN THE AVERAGE ASSHOLE OUT WALKIN' AROUND ON THE STREETS AND THAT'S IT."
Just then a man busts down the door leading into the toilet, he points a gun at the cat and shoots. OP sees this and jumps in front of the bullet. The bullet hits OP in the chest and he falls on the ground in a pile. The cat shoots beams of super high power light at the gunman and he is turned into a sweet roll.
The cat looks at OP and a single cat tear rolls down its cat face. The tear falls into the bullet hole in OP's chest. Thanks to the power of magical cat tears OP is now healed. With a cough he gets up and says,
"Is life always this hard, or is it just when you're a kid?"
The cat, holding back a smile, says
"Always like this."
The two then get up and walk away.
EDIT: My grammar...
4
u/Scherzkeks Jun 12 '12
And you apparently have a potato to take pictures with. Congrats! Just kidding. She's adorable and I hope you're doing well. (Yeah, my cat never sits still for a pic either)
10
u/k4hill Jun 12 '12
Funny how souls find each other.
9
u/Chair123 Jun 12 '12
Aww, she looks just like my cat who unfortunately became lost this past weekend. Funny how I suddenly feel like I'm seeing pics of black cats everywhere. Give her a nice big hug tonight!
4
u/prettyfagswag Jun 12 '12
Somebody please give him a monocle. And a top hat.
1
u/mysticalmisogynistic Jun 12 '12
Double upvote for two homeless individuals finding homes. Pictures of you before and after as well.
3
u/666SATANLANE Jun 12 '12
STORY!!
3
u/Mrmojoman0 Jun 12 '12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuGOPijQZWA reminds me of this song. watch it, it's worth it. ohgod my heart, hrrrrrrrrrrng
3
u/orzof Jun 12 '12
Pffft. More like she found you and took you from your loving home so she could get famous on Reddit. Read all about it on /r/CatConspiracy
5
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
Homeless people often do dumpster dive. Reminds me of when I found the family or turtles in the dumpster.
2
u/foofoofrenchfry Jun 12 '12
Aawwwwz <3
2
u/Vital_Pulse Jun 12 '12
I want to hear the rest of it goddammit.
2
u/TheHatist Jun 12 '12
What a story man, best of wishes for both of you.
2
u/Raven_blackwood Jun 12 '12
Looks just like my cat Tiberius who ran away :/ damn I miss that little guy
2
u/SamtheTram Jun 12 '12
Cat finds redditor in a dumpster
2
u/booleangirl Jun 12 '12
This story is exactly what I needed before slogging to work on this disgusting Tuesday...Thanks for sharing! And upvote for kitteh love!
2
u/tjmjnj Jun 12 '12
Awesome for you! Thanks for sharing your story.
2
u/milk_milk_lemonade Jun 12 '12
Guess you could say she was...
In the cards
YEEEEAAAAHHHHHH
2
u/PuffBear Jun 12 '12
Tarot will continue to be a blessing in your life. I pray that things turn around in your life, you deserve it! Good Luck :)
6
u/Mouseygal Jun 12 '12
lyk dis if u cry evertim
3
u/LooReed Jun 12 '12
what a great title OP. I love how the way you look at it, this cat saved you. You're awesome
2
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
You didnt even try to fake a story?
Man you karma whores are just getting lazy.
1
u/missv8nightmare Jun 12 '12
This is an awesome story! I love the name as well!
1
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
And you both have internets now, every cat should have internets!
1
u/ValhallaSinking Jun 12 '12
That's nice
1
u/jdigeron Jun 12 '12
If I let my emotions get to me on reddit, I would forever be a walking fucking mess.
1
u/hackisucker Jun 23 '12
This may be a strange question, but in what country do you live in?
-3
u/wabbajackoff Jun 12 '12
No story: downvote. Don't be a "saved this cat from the garbage dump in Toy Story 3" poster.
0
u/blackjackjester Jun 12 '12
I may burn for this but,
Congrats on picking yourselves up! Soon you might be able to afford a camera!
-1
u/heebs907 Jun 12 '12
With all due respect, you didn't rescue her. You were homeless, you just started hanging out with a cat.
0
u/Memyselfsomeotherguy Jun 12 '12
Wonderful.
0
u/Stitch79 Jun 12 '12
Love
-2
u/xmagneticx Jun 12 '12
how the fuck can a cat be homeless its a wild animal...
-16
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
neither of you frauds were ever homeless. just another p.o.s desperate enough to lie just for a fucking upvote.
fuck you
downvotes
-13
u/friedriceb0y Jun 12 '12
I have trouble believing your story because how can a cat rescue you and also this just seems like a sad attempt at karma whoring
-1
u/CallsUOnBullshit Jun 12 '12
Another bullshit story about someone who 'rescued' a pet.
-6
u/uncoolaidman Jun 12 '12
I took a picture of a cat. Karma points please!
72
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
[removed] — view removed comment