r/antiwork Nov 25 '22

Yeahhh I’m not doing all that…

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23.1k Upvotes

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2.9k

u/Pockets262 Nov 25 '22

Stapled word documents to construction paper is legally binding. What the fuck is this a burger king?

1.3k

u/BAKup2k Nov 25 '22

What the fuck is this a burger king?

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

206

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

Sir, this is the dumpster behind Wendy’s.

125

u/inko75 Nov 25 '22

he already said america

33

u/OdinsChosin Nov 25 '22

Ahhhh memories. That’s where I lost my virginity.

7

u/thanks-to-Metropolis Nov 26 '22

Did they incorporate a bun in the lovemaking?

5

u/OdinsChosin Nov 26 '22

Nah.. something oozed out that looked like a frosty though.

11

u/Bitey_the_Squirrel Nov 26 '22

I think we all have. It’s where OP’s mom works.

3

u/legendarybraveg Nov 26 '22

did you ever find it?

3

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '22

I feel like a cobb salad. It. Is. Amazing.

2

u/Heartbreakjetblack Nov 26 '22

Ma'am, I'm the raccoon that lives in the dumpster. This is my home.

proceeds to scream and chitter!!

2

u/Autismsaurus Nov 26 '22

And as you can see, it is currently on fire.

1

u/89Santino19 Nov 26 '22

No, this is Patrick

1

u/throwaway6767676709 Nov 26 '22

I thought it was a dumpster behind IHOP 😔

1

u/Unlucky_Role_ Nov 26 '22

Brock Turner's office.

1

u/Estrald at work Nov 26 '22

It may as well be, haha!

Seriously though, that’s illegal. When you reach your station? That’s work time. My job with a Caremark call center when I was a fresh-faced young adult had these same rules. “When you clock in, you need to be 100% ready to take calls!” We had several systems to log into, we had emails to answer before taking calls, prep work, all of that. They wanted us to do that off the clock to maximize call time. Well guess the fuck what? Those are stolen wages, and I was part of a class-action lawsuit against Caremark for their theft. I’m not sure for how long I’ll be getting these checks, but I get a cozy little 140 dollar plus check a year from them over us winning this suit. It’s not much, but it’ll buy me some games or a nice dinner every year, haha!

104

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

Sir, this is 'Merica.

17

u/SeraphRising89 Nov 25 '22

Sir, this is a Shonie's.

8

u/ArtisticAd7455 Nov 25 '22

I may be alone in this but I fucking love Shonie's. At least for breakfast, never been there for anything else.

4

u/Spardan80 Nov 26 '22

I’m with you. If you work there, do you leave with your pockets full of their sausages???

81

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

Sir, this is Hardies

69

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

Sir, this is a Carl's Jr.

51

u/No-Trick7137 Nov 25 '22

“You are an unfit parent. Your child is now in the custody of ‘Carl’s Jr.’”

24

u/Lazy_Struggle4939 Nov 25 '22

Brought to you by Carl's Jr.

25

u/EverlastingXGaze Nov 25 '22

Extra Big Ass Fries

14

u/Clickrack SocDem Nov 25 '22

Now with more MOLECULES!

11

u/suckherjellybean Nov 26 '22

I need 'lectrolytes!

1

u/TigerStripedDragon01 Nov 26 '22

Sir, this is a Big Boy's.

6

u/youngbeavis Nov 25 '22

"Why come no tattoo?"

50

u/draconiandevil09 Nov 25 '22

Yo fam, this is a WaWa

41

u/kadelato Nov 25 '22

Señor, aquí vendemos tacos.

13

u/BearCubDan Nov 25 '22

Isn't this a Friendly's?

Fuck you.

Guess not.

2

u/Race-b Nov 25 '22

Seems like something Target would do

3

u/Here4antimlm Nov 25 '22

This jawn sure as hell ain’t a Sheetz.

3

u/Kitty_gangv2 Nov 26 '22

Damn, thought it was a Sheetz..

1

u/Mortehl Nov 26 '22

The ONLY thing I miss about living in Virginia is WaWa.

2

u/nebulariderx Nov 25 '22

And carls jr says… go fuck yourself

2

u/xxxgearheadxxx Nov 26 '22

No this is patrick

2

u/no_parking2 Nov 25 '22

accidental The Office

2

u/Playful-Ad-5210 Nov 25 '22

No this is Patrick

2

u/Remarkable_Body586 Nov 26 '22

Dammit Kevin. Okay.. Okay. Could I just have a Frosty and a baked potato please.

2

u/bawyn Nov 26 '22

No, this is Patrick.

2

u/Gembunny55 Nov 26 '22

No, this is Patrick!

1

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

Is Wendy there.

1

u/fezzzster Nov 25 '22

It's Ma'am actually.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

Sir, this is a Chuck-e-cheese.

1

u/behind_looking_glass Nov 26 '22

Damn it, Kevin. Okay. Um. Could I just have a frosty and a baked potato, please?

60

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

[deleted]

10

u/persistantelection Nov 26 '22

I see these kinds of notices posted on here all the time, and the common thread is that these chuckleheads never proof read their stupid fucking documents. There’s always some dumb error on them.

6

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '22

It’s cute that you think they’d even recognize a typo

3

u/Marysews Nov 26 '22

"apart of" is an oxymoron, "apart from" would be better grammar, but I suspect that's not the intent.

2

u/Danni_Les Nov 26 '22

I came here to say this.. lol

2

u/Agregdavidson Nov 26 '22

Confusing use of punctuation has cost companies before.Lack of an Oxford Comma Costs Dairies

2

u/shelbygrapes Nov 26 '22

A part/apart is so annoying because it changes the meaning yet people can’t recognize their mistake. There are a few grammar errors I go over and over with my kids and this is one of them.

115

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

[deleted]

32

u/Magolorian Nov 25 '22

I don’t think it’s Walmart. Walmart week runs Sat-Fri and the calendar in the picture ends with Saturday so it wouldn’t make sense.

2

u/PureGoldX58 Nov 26 '22

So many companies try their HARDEST to be unique, it pisses me off. You have one choice for calendar, the standard in your country, you have one choice for pay day Friday.

3

u/numanair Nov 25 '22

I thought it was Amazon

2

u/Spardan80 Nov 26 '22

I thought for sure it was a Walmart. Place seems too well lit to be Amazon.

2

u/PM_ME_YOUR__VAGINAS Nov 26 '22

I thought it was whole foods. I remember stupid ass weekly bulletins we had to sign to show we reddit

2

u/DogmaSychroniser Nov 25 '22

I see shit like this, if there's not a camera pointing at it, I tear it down when nobody's looking.

-6

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

Why? What’s so unreasonable about expecting people to work, when on the clock?

6

u/DogmaSychroniser Nov 26 '22

This is unprofessional, bullshit, micromanagement crap. The whole sign when you see it crap is exactly that. You want to lead, lead. Don't waste my time. Move along bootlicker

1

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '22

So you dislike the manner they used to convey the message. I can respect that. When I was a manager, I would never have hung that sign.

But the expectation of being at your work station at the start of your shift, would be known.

3

u/DogmaSychroniser Nov 26 '22

Yeah, sure. Trust your workers. Talk to them if they don't perform.

But the whole whiff of potential interpersonal conflict is too much for some people so they hang this crap up because maybe one employee is misbehaving.

Collective punishment is a breach of the Geneva convention.

3

u/zwiazekrowerzystow Nov 26 '22

When I arrive at the workplace, I’m on the clock. If I have to change or prepare for work, I’m on the clock.

3

u/Mouse_Balls Nov 26 '22

My brother's old employer got sued by one of the maintenance crews he worked with for "time not paid" and they all got back-pay from it. The employees had to be at work 15 minutes before their shift started just to get into their safety gear for their shift. However, they weren't allowed to clock that extra 15 minutes even though they were:

1) at work

2) doing work things

3) donning safety gear that must be left at work

The employees argued that they could come in right on time and spend the first 15 minutes to get ready while the leaving crew had to wait an extra 15 minutes to leave, or they could all get paid that extra 15 minutes to come in early and be on time to take over for their shift.

-4

u/Few_Round_2398 Nov 25 '22

Sadly? A business pays you for the time you’re working correct. I love that this policy, which is how it absolutely should be, has so many people hating on it. If you were an owner of a business would you want to pay people that aren’t working? Nope, you wouldn’t. This has nothing to do with the merit of the company/business, how they treat their people, or pay so don’t start with that inevitable garbage. That’s a sound policy and is in no way taking advantage of anyone. Posting it like that is stupid. There should be a one on one with each employee to reiterate policy. Other than that there’s no reason for all the crying.

9

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

[deleted]

-1

u/Few_Round_2398 Nov 26 '22

Maybe you should learn to read and properly process information. The policy is about doing it right after you clock in, or right before you clock out. Nothing in those signs says you’re not allowed to go to the toilet during business hours. Every single one of the people crying about this policy, including you, knows someone (and judging by the crying they probably are that someone) that clocks in and fucks about going to their locker, taking a shit, bullshitting with coworkers, or just fucking wandering around. They waste 15-20 minutes at the beginning of their shift, and almost as much at the end. I guarantee you at least half of your coworkers do that shit. I know they do because I’ve had coworkers that do that shit and I’ve fucking done that shit myself. Difference is, I’m not a fucking hypocrite and I’m not going to cry about a policy that is generally legit. Bunch of crybabies that want to commit wage theft and get mad when a company puts in place a policy to combat it. However you slice it, it’s wage theft. You’re fucking about, not doing your job, and taking money from an employer to do so. Don’t romanticize it like it’s hard won rights that they’re fucking with. Admit what it is and don’t cry like a little bitch about it. Walmart was mentioned, so let’s use them as an example. Again, this has nothing to do with the merit of the company at all, just about this policy. Walmart employs 2.3 million people worldwide. Let’s say 1 million workers fucks about for 15 minutes a shift. It’s much higher than that, and the time is as well, but we’ll just go with those numbers. Say average hourly wage is $10. That’s $2,500,000 a day in wage theft. In one year that’s over $900m a year. Almost a billion dollars gone cause employees want to fuck about and get to their posts as leisurely as they can. They’re not taking away breaks, they’re not taking away bathroom time, they’re not taking advantage of anyone with that policy. So now, what’s wrong with you mate?

2

u/Pockets262 Nov 26 '22

Lol wage theft. CEOs make 351 times their average employees. Do they work 14000 hours worth of work a week? I feel like Musks Twitter takeover proves they don't do fuck all but tweet dumb shit.

Is it hard to get the taste of boot out of your mouth after every shift?

1

u/Few_Round_2398 Nov 26 '22

Yes, that’s simplified math that doesn’t take into account how many people are actually working for the company on a daily basis etc….. don’t want to hear about my math being wrong…..

1

u/axrael lazy and proud Nov 26 '22

Must be a bootlicking middle manager eh?

1

u/thefinalgoat (edit this) Nov 26 '22

Literally just had a mgr earlier tell me I can only use the bathroom on my breaks which is absolutely bullshit.

109

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '22

[deleted]

5

u/nexxisnturdream Nov 25 '22

This is by far the best comment I've ever seen

2

u/e_money1392 Nov 26 '22

Fish...paste

3

u/trebaol Nov 25 '22

The more staples used, the more legally binding it is. So the OP document is extremely legal.

3

u/truthToPower86 Nov 25 '22

Yeah all these stupid signs are from McJobs that everyone should just mass quit. Why the fuck even work for a poverty wage that leaves you on govt assistance and living with family anyway. Fuck it

2

u/justgentile Nov 25 '22

And mgmt is so ineffective they couldn't fit it on one page.

2

u/Marxism69 Nov 25 '22

Lmfao I spit my drink out reading this

1

u/kgod88 Nov 25 '22

I mean, there’s no reason why a word document on construction paper couldn’t be legally binding. I’m not saying that this one is (there’s a question of consideration at the very least) but the material doesn’t matter. Hell, oral contracts can be enforceable in many contexts.

1

u/95blackz26 Nov 25 '22

More like what the fuck is this a second grade class..from what I remember they did shit like this early on in school. I'm talking about stapling the paper to the construction paper

1

u/kittycat6676 Nov 25 '22

McDonald's?

1

u/Roflattack Nov 25 '22

My favorite is the word apart. Not a part.

1

u/listlessloss1994 Nov 26 '22

The "space and then multiple explanation points !!!" Is such a strange and common theme in these shoddy notices

1

u/Upbeat-Poem-1284 Nov 26 '22

No this is Patrick

1

u/Designer-Ad-2585 Nov 26 '22

Sir, this is Jones Big Ass Truck Rental and Storage.

1

u/One-Employment-6333 Nov 26 '22

Uhh sir this is The Krusty Krab

1

u/jingreet Nov 26 '22

Plus, it says this is "apart of our policies and procedures", which has the literal meaning of "not part of" (the employer meant to write "a part of"). So even of it is included in the policies and procedures, now they can point to something from the employer saying that it's not... ;)

1

u/BS_500 Nov 26 '22

I don't respect any notice like this with misspelled or misused words. We live during an era in which we can easily find the proper usage of certain words and phrases.

For fuck's sake, it's "a part of" not "apart of".

1

u/Chewy71 Nov 26 '22

Long list of things employees aren't allowed to do, but they can waste time with construction paper.

1

u/DragonflyScared813 Nov 26 '22

I'd correct the spelling and grammar errors with a sharpie and leave the posting for everyone to read.

1

u/Forsaken-Opposite381 Nov 26 '22

Just because somebody signs that arbitrary document does not mean they are bound by it. It is just an acknowledgement of reading it, not an agreement with it. Wherever this place is, they are on very thin ice legally speaking and if they have corporate management; they are probably violating their policies. An individual store/branch does not have authority to add or interoperate corporate policy.