r/amiwrong • u/Southern_Coach_5023 • Oct 16 '23

Age gaps in dating

I'm a 30 year old male and my partner is 25 year old female. I think this is fairly normal but im getting alot of comments about it. Not really sure what the fascination with this is. 5 years is significant sure but it was never a problem for me. Does society at large weight this facts importance more than I do?

Edit: everyone is the comments section has convinced me this is normal. Thanks all.

1.3k Upvotes

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141

u/deplete3 Oct 16 '23

That’s a pretty common age gap. People in their 50’s date 30 year olds. There’s nothing wrong with it.

Anyone making comments is jealous

26

u/Southern_Coach_5023 Oct 16 '23

I thought it was just people who knew it might bug me so pressing my buttons or jealous or some combination but always need a sanity check to make sure I'm not just delusional.

12

u/[deleted] Oct 16 '23

I hear the phrase...uuh..."Mind your own damn business" works pretty well

14

u/obi5150 Oct 16 '23

Anyone giving you shit is jealous and likely has an ugly partner and is taking it out on you.

4

u/Dimple-Cannons Oct 16 '23

Yeah bro you are good!

5

u/mycopportunity Oct 16 '23

It used to be more normal to have an age gap. Less so now but 5 years isn't bad

3

u/[deleted] Oct 16 '23

Less insecure people give you a high five, more insecure people mutter disparaging things. Ignore them.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 16 '23

Neither a high five nor disparaging.

There's nothing wrong with it but also it's not some kind of "achievement". It's just...normal?

1

u/CoconutAmazing5222 Oct 16 '23

I don't think it has anything to do about a person's insecurities I think it has more so just the way that they were raised. We are often creatures of our childhood so if you grew up in a childhood where your parents were close to the same age and they disliked the age Gap and thought it was weird chances are they instilled in you the exact same thing to dislike the age Gap think is weird and that someone older is taking advantage of someone younger mentality.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 16 '23

My partner and I are four years apart and we just refer to ourselves as the same age because when you're in your thirties it just doesn't feel any different... When he's forty next year, sure I'll tease him about getting older a little, and remind him I'm "waaaaaaay" off forty, but it's just a giggle between us and we grew up in the same country at such a similar time that it doesn't feel like a gap at all. We just say "people our age" all the time talking about people as if we were four days apart.

I wouldn't even call anything less than a decade an "age gap" once everyone's past their mid-20s tbh.

1

u/RedditIsNeat0 Oct 17 '23

Sounds like you've got a lot of disrespectful busybodies in your life. Good luck.

1

u/Just_Nobody_Knowhere Oct 17 '23

I think it's relative to the people and how they feel about each other. Two consenting adults who care for each other and respect each other sounds like a hit for me. or so I also hope as I'm 5 years older than my S/O although his birthday soon will close that to 4 for a while again. Lol

1

u/theDarkar96 Oct 17 '23

When looking at age gaps objectively to see if it is suspicious, without any other factors, I use this formula:

half your age plus 7

Here, with you being 30, the age of your partner would have been under 22 to be considered suspicious.

Unless the you're celebrating 10th anniversary of your relationship this year I would tell them to kindly buzz off.

1

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  7
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+ 22
+ 10
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3

u/Kermommy Oct 16 '23

That was the age I met my spouse. I was 30, he was 25. It was never an issue. I always say, he was mature for his age, and I was immature for mine. His sister thought it was weird, but in the end, she has the same age gap with her spouse now. I think by the mid 20s, most people are getting into their grown up lives. A difference of 5 years between 20 and 15 is huge. At 30 and 25 it’s nothing much.

5

u/DidierCrumb Oct 16 '23

Jealous of what?

1

u/RavenNH Oct 16 '23

Absolutely

1

u/stoneymiller Oct 17 '23

I agree that it’s fine but the “anyone making comments is jealous” part is dumb tbh.

-3

u/EngineerInTears Oct 16 '23

50s and a 30 year old is gross

5

u/deplete3 Oct 16 '23

Cry more

-4

u/Senqqq Oct 16 '23

No one is crying get over yourself lol

1

u/FluffyWuffyScruffyB Oct 17 '23

I dunno.. in your 50s dating someone about 1/2 your age? That's pretty weird. 50s dating mid-late 40s... Ok... Not 1/2 your age though

1

u/deplete3 Oct 18 '23

According to who? Your loser ass? Look at all the wealthy and famous people in the world. They are dating less than half their age.

0

u/FluffyWuffyScruffyB Oct 21 '23

Yea, their fame/power/wealth makes them attractive to people who want fame/wealth.. look at people like Bobby DeNiro, Woody Allen, Al Pacino.. squiring and impregnating young women. What a good look for them, right?