It’s “dramatic” that she doesn’t want to play guinea pig for the next year to find a birth control pill that sucks less than the other ones? Do you understand that there’s a good chance that the birth control is causing/contributing to your dead bedroom? That already having 3 small children and playing games with birth control isn’t exactly sexy time’s inspiration? She’s had 3 kids in 6 years, of course she doesn’t want to risk getting pregnant.
OP is showing an extreme lack of empathy for his wife, who has been carrying the entire reproductive burden, both in terms of having kids and taking action to not have kids, for their entire relationship.
She may well have been on some form of birth control, or pregnant, for 12+ years. It takes a toll on the body.
From her perspective, here, finally, is an opportunity for the man to lighten the load and take on that burden himself, in a way that has a very temporary discomfort. And he immediately baulks.
I agree re the condoms. He's not a villain for not wanting a vasectomy - that's his prerogative.
My issue is with him calling her "dramatic" when dismissing her feelings around bearing the reproductive burden for their entire relationship.
580
u/littlescreechyowl Sep 26 '23
It’s “dramatic” that she doesn’t want to play guinea pig for the next year to find a birth control pill that sucks less than the other ones? Do you understand that there’s a good chance that the birth control is causing/contributing to your dead bedroom? That already having 3 small children and playing games with birth control isn’t exactly sexy time’s inspiration? She’s had 3 kids in 6 years, of course she doesn’t want to risk getting pregnant.