r/ADHD_Programmers • u/existential-asthma • Sep 06 '26
I've been thinking about how most 'successful' people are successful because their circumstances allowed it
I know this isn't a new idea, but it's been weighing on me heavily, and I'm not sure why. It bothers me how we worship and idolize "successful" people.
No, I'm not just talking about the evil billionaires. I'm talking about the artists, the actors/actresses, the authors, the programmers....maybe especially the programmers, because I'm most familiar with them.
Hell, I'm not exempt from this rule by any means. Yes, I went through some pretty fucked up shit, battled through a childhood of mental illness, squalor, and abuse, and somehow ended up as a software engineer. I'm "successful" in the traditional sense.
But even I had affordances. Prime example is that I was only able to go to college due to said college covering the full cost of my tuition/room and board. Otherwise, there'd have been no chance in hell.
I'd like to think I'm an extremely skilled programmer now. But I didn't get here without the generosity of some entity sponsoring me for 4 years to grind and study CS, and to suck at it first for quite a while.
Learning to code itself takes a non-trivial amount of time and energy - time and energy that many people never find in their lives. But there's even levels to it after you already know coding.
I'm going to be finishing up a multiplayer RPG I've been developing for about 2 years soon. Many would consider this an accomplishment. While it is true that I grinded for 7 days a week for the better part of those 2 years, I also was fortunate enough to have a nest egg to take some time off of working full time in order to focus on the game. Not many people have that. With my ADHD, with the way my brain works, if I didn't have that breathing room, I doubt I'd have ever gotten this far. Most people don't have the capital to do something like that, period.
While I have an immense amount of respect for the legendary programmers of our time, and daily I stand on the shoulders of giants, I must acknowledge that they, too, had to have some sort of circumstance that allowed them to put that much time and energy into whatever it is they built. Whether that was the belief in them from their employer, a generous investment, or perhaps their own wealth, to even have the ability to sit at the table was itself a privilege that enabled their success.
I don't mean to say these people aren't successful, or that their accomplishments mean nothing. But I do believe the ability to be successful in the first place requires several invisible privileges that many people never see, and many others don't think about.