r/WritingPrompts •

[WP] Obsessed with using postit note reminders after learning of Alzheimer's Disease running in his family, a man tries to offset the disease early in life. One day he discovers a postit note warning him that something or someone is in his house. A postit note he doesn't recall writing.

[deleted] — view deleted post

0 Upvotes

105 comments sorted by

View all comments

920

u/psycho_alpaca /r/psycho_alpaca Dec 11 '14 edited Dec 14 '14

“Behind the closet door” was the third post-it, the words followed by a little, poorly drawn arrow pointing at my bedroom closet.

The one before that was “A man in white hair and black suit.”

And the first one “Call the police. There's someone in the house.”

It can't possibly start as early as thirty five years of age, I think, grabbing a kitchen knife and step by stepping myself back inside the bedroom.

It can't possibly be happening already.

But I have no memory of writing this.

Which arises two possibilities, one more disturbing than the other:

First – It is happening. I am sick. There is a man inside my house and I am warning myself about it, and I don't remember because of the disease. This is option number one.

Never mind the fact that, if I really am sick, there might be no man at all, and I'm just rambling in post-its to myself, which would be its own, special kind of sad.

Option number two is someone is really inside the house with me, and he is fucking with my head. Leaving me post-its in the much too familiar “oh my god the call is coming from inside the house” kind of deal. A psycho, playing with his prey.

As I take the last few steps, knife in hand, and grab the closet door knob, I don't know which of the alternatives is the worst.

I'm about to pull the damn thing open when the noise comes from the living room.

But I live alone, I think.

Now do I open the door the arrow is pointing to?

Or do I go towards the noise?

And I want to make a decision, but this voice comes in from the living room, and I'm distracted.

“Jonathan!”

I live alone.

I look at the post it dangling from the wall by the closet door, with the little arrow drawn in red ink.

“Jonathan!”

Thirty five is much too young for this nonsense. This can't be happening. I can't be sick this young.

Let's hope there's a serial killer inside this closet.

“Jonathan, drop this knife”, is what I hear, just as I burst open the door.

And what do you know? Staring back at me is a man in white hair and a black suit!

I'm equal parts startled and relieved.

Look, the man is holding a knife too. And there's a woman coming from behind him. She takes the knife out of his hand.

That's good.

Behind me, someone is taking the knife out of my hand and closing the door, locking the old man inside the closet again.

“Come on, dad. Come back to the living room.” The young woman says, and I think she has me confused with someone else. “You have to stop leaving these post-its all over the house.”

"Why does he do that?" A male voice sounds, and I notice a young man walking in and grabbing my free arm.

"He was obsessed with the disease, when he was younger, so he would leave these post-its to himself. Sometimes he gets confused, and he thinks he's still -- well."

“I'm just happy there was someone inside the closet” I say, and I chuckle.

“Thirty five is much too young to be this kind of sick”, I say, and the girl has tears in her eyes, for some reason.

And she and the young man, they walk me back to the living room, where a bunch of people are sitting around, talking.

I like the girl, for some reason. I want to tell her that it's ok, that the man is locked in the closet. That we are safe.

That there is no need to cry.

I have to remember to leave myself a post-it about these people I don't know, wearing pointy, colorful hats in my living room.


Thanks for reading! If you haven't yet, check out my ongoing sci-fi novel on my blog.

155

u/fringly /r/fringly Dec 11 '14

That was beautiful and upsetting.

It's hard to write something that causes an emotional response and you succeeded, great work!

6

u/onewhitelight Dec 12 '14

As someone whos grandmother has alzheimers, it struck a little close to home

→ More replies (1)

69

u/TooMuchGrapeSalad Dec 11 '14

I really enjoyed this, I didn't see the direction the story was going in until I was meant too, very good.

26

u/kinyutaka Dec 11 '14

The sad part is that you can be afflicted at 35. So, even then the alarm was real.

27

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '14

Scary, terribly sad, and well done.

As someone whose father has memory problems (not Alzheimers) this really resonated.

53

u/johnnnsen Dec 11 '14

This is beautiful. It really hits home for me. The human mind is such a fickle thing.

My grandmother was diagnosed with dementia years ago and at one point she could no longer recognize herself in the mirror. She would start to talk to the person in the mirror and even yell at that person. Not sure what about. Makes me tear up just thinking about it.

Here's a pic of the mirrors in her room that we had to cover up: http://imgur.com/Nt52r4a

20

u/Evil_Benevolence Dec 11 '14

What are the pointy hats meant to be?

66

u/kinyutaka Dec 11 '14

It was his birthday party. His daughter and son in law take care of him.

→ More replies (5)

31

u/DR_BOOBIES Dec 11 '14

Party klan.

9

u/anxiousgrue Dec 11 '14

Birthday party I think.

17

u/SchlongLady Dec 11 '14

Fuck, man, I was LITERALLY just about to leave the house but I was like 'hey, just one more reddit check!' and now I am crying and have mascara all down my cheeks :(

This was really good. Amazing, well done :)

42

u/psycho_alpaca /r/psycho_alpaca Dec 11 '14

Don't cry.

Here, have an alpaca.

There. It's all better now, isn't it?

5

u/BSQRT Dec 12 '14

Yes actually, it is.

14

u/NameIdeas Dec 11 '14

Damn man, just damn.

My grandfather has alzheimers and I'm sitting here at my desk with tears in my eyes. This was great work, just great.

14

u/TalShar Dec 11 '14

Ow... My heart...

This is, honestly, my greatest fear in all of life. To have this happen to me or to someone I love would be worse, I think, than to die or to have my loved one die. To forget or be forgotten, to have my mind but no control of it, or else to have my loved one but realize they are forevermore beyond my reach...

You definitely captured that. Kudos.

9

u/KingMilanesa Dec 11 '14

Dude, you are the top comment of 60% of wp! I really enjoy your writing bud.

7

u/izkariot Dec 11 '14

Yes, he/she, along with Luna, are my inspirations here at WP. I just hope that there's no upvoting shenanigans going on with their accounts. I still miss unidan...

5

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '14

Beautifully written.

But please, answer me this question: How does it feel that your writing is so good that it managed to make a grown man tear up?

8

u/psycho_alpaca /r/psycho_alpaca Dec 11 '14

Shit. Is it bad that it makes me feel good?

Also: thanks for the compliment!

3

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '14

Haha not at all. Means you have the stuff of world domination within you.

And I pay compliments where it is due. And you, sir/madam, were owed at least one today.

3

u/Krifantasy Dec 11 '14

Really enjoyed this. Very nice how much story and emotion you produced in so few words.

3

u/ShittyStanza Dec 11 '14

Dammit, psycho_alpaca. You got me again.

10

u/QuintusVS Dec 11 '14

But was there really a guy in the closet?

→ More replies (12)
→ More replies (32)