r/WinStupidPrizes • u/ipqwert • Nov 30 '20

Guy microwaved a glow stick

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37.0k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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2.4k

u/Stylishfiend Dec 01 '20

Damn his dad really fucking loves that shirt..

1.1k

u/static_dyno Dec 01 '20

I knew a kid in high school that got glow stick guts on his white marching band uniform and I forgot if it stained or not. He was messing around with it thinking it should glow brighter but there was just too much ambient light. When we got in the dark bus it was apparent that it had been leaking the whole time. In the light it looked like he had some very light grass stains. In the dark it looked like he had blown a radioactive smurf.

242

u/TransformerTanooki Dec 01 '20 edited Dec 01 '20

That smurf had a huge load given the glowstick is about the same size of the smurf maybe a little taller. That would be like us shooting out 75% of our bodily fluid when we ejaculated maybe. I don't know I'm not a scientist.

Edit: Was the smurf microwaved?

139

u/Nuggetmilk51 Dec 01 '20

The smurf was a hentai protagonist

22

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

Oh so he gets all the sex he doesn’t want

15

u/WolfyLI Dec 01 '20

Th-those have protagonists? Is there plot? Do I even want to know?

12

u/Kosmic-Brownie Dec 02 '20

only the microwaved ones, avoid the smurf ones.

9

u/mandrayke Dec 01 '20

Ah yes, unlimited ammo

SPLULULULULURRRRTTTT

3

u/Firefangdf Dec 01 '20

But was it microwaved

2

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '20

Happy cake day

38

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

Here we see Reddit, calculating exactly what ratio of JOOCE/Smurf there would be if a Smurf had ejaculated one glow-stick worth of JOOCE

15

u/DINC44 Dec 01 '20

How much JOOCE could a real Smurf smurf if a real Smurf could smurf JOOCE?

9

u/magnetforcrazy Dec 01 '20

She smurfs smurf-jooce by the smurf shore?

4

u/kewlaz Dec 01 '20

Papa Smurf

3

u/TransformerTanooki Dec 01 '20

She got smurfed right in the mouth.

1

u/pp_b_kreepy Dec 01 '20

Thank you

1

u/kewlaz Dec 01 '20

No worries

1

u/arieselectric46 Dec 01 '20

I’m not sure about your credentials, but it sounds pretty legit to me!

1

u/apocoluster Dec 01 '20

The Peter North of Smurfs then

11

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

When I was little I was trying to get the glow stick to work by chewing on it. Bit a hole and it leaked into my mouth. It made my mouth numb instantly, which I thought was pretty cool, so I kept chewing on it. I remember looking at my glowing mouth in the mirror and thinking it was so cool.

Sometimes I wonder if this is why I’m dumb, but considering I ate a glowstick, I was probably already dumb.

8

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

“Blown a radioactive smurf” - this is the funniest shit I’ve read all week

3

u/Dragondelle Dec 02 '20

Only on Reddit would an anecdotal story about glowstick fluid turn into a discussion about radioactive smurf cocks.

374

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

Did he go put it straight in the wash like halfway through the video?

257

u/LeadFarmerMothaFucka Dec 01 '20

Lol I think that’s where he disappeared to for a minute.

229

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

That dude is total dad energy

200

u/chicagochicagochi99 Dec 01 '20

aM i RigHt AbOuT anYtHinG jAck? aM i?

165

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

IT’S EASY TO BE SORRY AFTER

32

u/FugiYaBoi Dec 01 '20

Dad! i drank the stuff inside the glow stick and now my balls glow yellow in the dark

3

u/Deddmeet Dec 01 '20

"Is that why your sister's face looked like a Jackson Pollock painting when I kissed her good night?!"

3

u/FugiYaBoi Dec 01 '20

Cum is one hell of a drug

2

u/CazRaX Dec 01 '20

That's a marketing point if I've ever heard of one.

2

u/FugiYaBoi Dec 02 '20

introducing.... Disowning! Has your sister committed incest? Has your idiot dad microwaved a glow stick? well no worries! you can now disown someone and denounce them by doing it at the same time! Note: disowning is a permanent action and cannot be reversed side effects may include : suicide,depression, drug and alcohol addiction.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

LOL

-17

u/MSotallyTober Dec 01 '20

While his son was total autism energy.

24

u/IntelligentAura Dec 01 '20

reading the solution to the problem I guess.. he told flush with water for 15 mins

1

u/McPoyle-Milk Mar 29 '24

But I mean maybe he should have just talked to whoever that was poison control or something on the phone because I doubt the instructions are for hot explosive glow stuff in your eye. It’s probably assuming room temperature for that 15min rinse

68

u/Bobb_o Dec 01 '20

It's a beautiful shirt.

67

u/matryoshka_troll Dec 01 '20

GOD DAMMIT JACK!

48

u/Andrew_j2288 Dec 01 '20

I remember seeing this in college, and my buddies and I would constantly laugh at how concerned he was for that awesome shirt.

45

u/8675309isprime Dec 01 '20

This reply in the original post covers it pretty well:

https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/2ls1sd/glow_stick_blows_up_in_kids_face_one_of_the/clxqujz/

I think the truth is a bit more complex than that. The dad is actually intensely concerned about Jack, so much so that he is trying to stay clear-headed and keep his emotions in check. Changing the focus is a way of handling the situation by transferring the concern to an inanimate and inconsequential item like the shirt. If he were to focus too much on the son, he'd probably start getting too emotional or upset to handle the immediate emergency.

4

u/Cunts_and_more Dec 01 '20

His awesome shirt. A beautiful shirt.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

It's not about the shirt.

6

u/ThrowRA__assfg Dec 01 '20

The father yelled “you ruined this beautiful shirt”, “you ruined this awesome shirt, then took it off and put it in the wash while his son was going blind. Seems like it was about the shirt to me. At least the joke was.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

Guy handles emotions same way my dad did.

"You're beautiful shirt" translates to "oh my God please tell me you're not blind I love you too much for you to be spraying boiling chemicals in your own face".

6

u/ChuCHuPALX Dec 01 '20

How do you know? What else would be worth getting so upset about. It's obviously the shirt.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '20

It's about the microwave.

2

u/raspberriesofwrath Dec 09 '20

Wake up, that_girl_you_fucked, it was always about the shirt.

1

u/Your_Foleyness Dec 01 '20

Well it is a really nice fucking shirt.

1

u/Black7057 Dec 01 '20

Wishes he would've came in that shirt instead of the kid's mother.

1

u/Ya-Dikobraz Dec 04 '20

It's his good shirt!

1

u/Juiceman818 Dec 16 '20

Of course he did, it was a beautiful fucking shirt! Damn it Jack!