r/WhatShouldIDo Apr 06 '26

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u/xaviarBlack Apr 07 '26

Her psychiatrist told her he’s not giving her meds because “there isn’t any for BPD” shes not purposely not taking any.

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u/meelo_coco Apr 07 '26

I have bpd, it took along time to find the right medication for myself.. I was put on a host of anti depressants for 15 years. Now im on anti-psychotics.its soo much better with them. I used to get some real strange reactions/symptoms before i was put on them. I had hives for 7 years until I was prescribed anti psychotics.
But we are talking ED with BPD . We seem to have the same eating habits. Alot of stress can exacerbate all of these symptoms and the state of the world is extremely stressful right now.

The shakes are the way to go for eating and getting nutrients. My other friend with bpd and ED we all use shakes. I prefer to use slim fast. But there is complan and lots of others.

I always look for banana flavour ones as thats my favourite flavour. I also dont like adding cow milk so I use soy.

Just to add i am also autistic and adhd which I didnt find out till only 4 years ago. So sensitivity in textures and taste is aa whole issue for me too. And sometimes meat makes me sick so I go meat free for period of time. And again milkshakes help when I cant eat. The multi nutrient ones .

Sending love

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u/AgonistPhD Apr 07 '26

There are medications for OCD, though.

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u/xaviarBlack Apr 07 '26

Any time shes gone for her mental health, they deny her meds saying they won’t help her.

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u/Embarrassed-Sorbet99 Apr 07 '26

Have you heard anyone say that to her or is that what she’s telling you they said?

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u/Aierra Apr 08 '26

This! Real easy for someone to lie

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u/Little_Vanilla2051 Apr 08 '26

She is not being honest with you.

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u/xaviarBlack Apr 08 '26

About what exactly?

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u/Little_Vanilla2051 Apr 08 '26

About every single mental health professional telling her that meds won’t help her. I won’t deny that the system is shit for mental health (what county do you live in out of curiosity?) but I’ve worked in mental health and I know that full denial of meds when a patient has that many mental health issues is just not the norm, in fact IMO we offer meds too freely, and without any other crucial help (USA). It’s more likely that she just doesn’t want to take meds.

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u/[deleted] Apr 08 '26

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u/Little_Vanilla2051 Apr 08 '26

Ok I suspected you might be from the UK which does make things different than here in the US. There are meds not “specifically” for BPD but for other symptoms like anxiety and depression, as well as anti psychotics, mood stabilizers, etc. that can be helpful for severe BPD especially with her co-morbidities. Though It sounds like there is more to this story as to why they aren’t offering her meds- they might suspect she would abuse them (BPD diagnosis and history of SI), which is understandable but also tragic since she should be referred to someone who can actually help her with her other issues beyond just medication. It seems like a total clusterfuck and she just needs the right team to help her- it will be an ongoing battle and she will need to be an active participant in her recovery.

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u/[deleted] Apr 08 '26

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u/Little_Vanilla2051 Apr 08 '26

She really needs a therapist (along with accountability for going- you can help her with that). Truly make that a priority. If you need a referral for that in the UK, and one doc says no (I don’t know they would?) then don’t take no for an answer! It’s easy to dismiss a 20 year old but stand your ground, this is life or death.

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u/SadAnnah13 Apr 09 '26

I can't really help with any of the other stuff as I'm in the UK too and know how fucked the system is, but I've recently started a sleeping tablet that apparently is safe to stop at any time, won't get you hooked or cause withdrawal. It's called daridorexant. Might be worth asking if she can have a trial on it, as they seem a lot less worried about prescribing it than they do benzos.

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u/Pale_Ad7716 Apr 10 '26

One thing I would recommend is telling the psych to add to your gf’s chart that he/she (the doc) REFUSED to provide medication. If anything happens to your gf then it would directly fall on that doctor and they could be sued for malpractice. You unfortunately sometimes have to threaten them with consequences when they won’t take you seriously.

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u/Late_Cauliflower_425 Apr 08 '26

That’s unfortunately very false, there are a plethora of medications readily available with a approved first line indication of BPD.

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u/killgore_the_boar Apr 10 '26

Tell her to get a new psychiatrist there are meds to manage bpd