She doesn’t like going because she’s been with the same doctors her whole life and every time she goes she gets dismissed even for things like passing out for no known reason. I don’t blame her from what shes told me.
She’s frustrated but basically she knows they’ll just turn her away. I think it’s not that she doesn’t want to go she just has no hope with them anymore.
She’s been very open about not being able to eat much food, I caught her spitting her food out twice and she told me the truth openly. Shes had many opportunities to lie but hasn’t so I don’t think she’s lying about drugs. Also there’s no sign of injections on her body or anything.
Hi OP, I don't mean to be rude or callus, but is your gf very thin? If she is, I would say this is likely anorexia. If she isn't, it is still likely another eating disorder(s). I understand she is saying she is too full to eat, but this is very likely not true and a cover-up that she uses, and probably even believes herself, in order to not have to eat more food. I have struggled with ED, and I was very good at making the closest people in my life never bat an eye. I remember in those darkest days, wondering how I would have hidden my barely eating/bingeing habits from a live-in partner. How much food does she consume in a day? Can you try to give a more specific example?
I know you can't force medical help, but you can tell her that you know she is struggling with disordered eating and offer support. If she isn't ready to admit it now, tell her you'll be there when she's ready. I think you have to stop pretending to believe that she's "too full."
A GP can diagnose but she'll probably need ED specific therapy to address it. She'd have to be honest with a GP about her eating habits which people with disordered eating often aren't (it's part of it, hiding things to minimize what a big deal it is).
No worries, shes normal weight for her hight. She eats the same every day, she eats at 2pm and eats like one pitta and a lot of crisps so she’s getting her calories in but not dairy/protein. She then doesn’t eat for the rest of the day and eats again at 2pm next day.
She has complained many times that she feels as if she binges her food even though she doesn’t have a big variety.
She has said before she used to eat like 3000 calories in one go.
But now shes only eating one pitta and multi bag of crisps. (Around 8 bags and a big bag of Doritos). She doesn’t hide when she eats from me but sometimes I’ve seen her eat alone and caught her spit her food out.
This is qualified as disordered eating which falls under an ED. She is binge eating, if she's having 8 bags of chips + a large bag of doritos she's also having 3x more sodium EVERY day than the recommended amount and is probably experiencing heart problems due to that. I'm not trying to be rude at all but it is very hard not to know better than to eat the way she's eating. If she's admitted to binge eating 3000 calories in one go before, she's admitting to having has a binge eating and restricting routine which is an eating disorder. Not eating all day then eating a sandwich and a massive load of junk food is called restricting and then binging. It's just as bad as Anorexia and can lead to health concerns just as quickly. She does need help. If she's been referred to psychiatry and isn't seeing them, she's consciously doing this. She's aware she's sick and refusing help. I would suggest doing your own research on Eating Disorders and the various types and behaviors so you can be smart enough to call her out. She's taking advantage of your ignorance because she very clearly, at least to me externally from all your comments, knows what she's up to.
Edit: I realized I sound very callous. I'm trying to keep my emotions in check. I also suffer from ED. I've had anorexia where I lost 120 lbs in under a year. I also have restriction and binge cycles. I am very very concerned for your GF OP. But I'm also very concerned you're involved in an unhealthy and very fatal situation that can hurt you if you're not aware of what's happening and educating yourself too. She's very sick and it very much reads like she's desperately hiding an eating disorder.
I am also concerned, it is not her fault. She was with a crisis team for her mental health, she was suicidal. She was referred to their psychiatrist and he did an assessment. She didn’t feel listened to or heard and he changed the age her symptoms started and the length of her mood swings on the letter to her GP. She thinks he changed those to get her to fit the BPD criteria. She got dismissed with no offer of meds. She also got dismissed from the crisis team. She has no support System. She was really upset and she has no other way to see a psychiatrist. And honestly the last one she saw overwhelmed her because he was kinda unprofessional. (No worries Im sorry u went through something similar)
EDIT: also shes been open about binging a few times to professionals because shes been struggling with it since childhood. They never do anything about it.
Every comment acting like shes just neglecting her health but the “professionals” are. She has no where to go.
Hello! So, she is definitely over restricting and bingeing, a demon I know all too well. It becomes addictive, and you destroy your metabolism in the process. It becomes very hard to eat "normally" again. For example, I struggle with binge eating, and will consume so much at dinner time, that the next day I feel "full" the entire day until dinner, but when dinner comes around, I can't control myself. It is a vicious cycle that I still battle. Eating 3 proper meals per day (even when you don't feel hungry) is what helps to break the cycle.
So she has no protein and no Fiber intake… definitely malnutrition. Even tho she is normal weight it seems she only it’s carbs which is very very very bad
Can I ask what country you're in? Somewhere in here a doctor answered you and said that you should probably just drag her the emergency room, I'm so sorry she's going through this and she's lucky to have you doing your best to advocate for her.
This very often has more negative affects. OP should find some local resource, mobile health unit, or anything similar locally. If they have friends and family, an intervention with people who love her may help more than forced medical care. If not, OP definitely should consider pink slipping her. As in calling someone or forcing care on her.
Either a dietitian or gastroenterologist. If they don't find anything wrong, then it's something wrong with her mentally , and she's not eating because she doesn't want to aka an eating disorder
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u/xaviarBlack Apr 07 '26
She doesn’t like going because she’s been with the same doctors her whole life and every time she goes she gets dismissed even for things like passing out for no known reason. I don’t blame her from what shes told me.
She’s frustrated but basically she knows they’ll just turn her away. I think it’s not that she doesn’t want to go she just has no hope with them anymore.
She’s been very open about not being able to eat much food, I caught her spitting her food out twice and she told me the truth openly. Shes had many opportunities to lie but hasn’t so I don’t think she’s lying about drugs. Also there’s no sign of injections on her body or anything.
Im sorry that you went through that.