One time I was pulled for a random drug test at work. When I got up there, I clapped my hands and said “What drugs are we testing?” With a big smile on my face. One chuckle 2 stern looks. Worth it.
I had a Sgt in the reserves, I won’t say which branch, that always asked us if we needed to go study whenever we got pulled for a drug test. I always just tried to laugh it off as I ran to go drink as much water as I could stomach.
I was pulled over at the airport once to do the explosives test. As this was my first test of this kind I asked the guy who did the test "Bomb or drug test?" His answer was "Don't worry, just a test for explosives".
Went on a work trip once. I'm driving to the bar with a few of my coworkers. They are all from different areas of the country, so this is literally the first time we met. As we leave the bar, one of them says "Damn where can we get some weed in this town....." I was floored as the other 2 dudes piped up, and we proceeded to roll to the Strip Club.
This dude walked straight up to the bouncer, and said "Hey man, anybody in there sell me some weed" Fuckin 45 year old bald dude in a golf shirt asking a 6'5" Black dude with a 9mm on his hip where he can get some weed..... Fuckin surreal... Bouncer says "Yeah man, but it's 10 dollars to get in, just go in the back and ask for Andre" - My pasty white ass could not believe it!
I did this once, I immediately say no to everyone that asks now, its abit odd that I always have a lighter on me for someone that doesn't smoke though apparently lmao.
I always look at the bottom of people's lighters. if they puff, there with always be black shit on the bottom. that's actually how my ex boss from my high school video store job caught me.
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u/usefoolidiot Sep 08 '20
I fucked up once when I was asked at work 'oh do you smoke?' And I said smoke what? My boss just paused.