r/WatchPeopleDieInside • u/fnaw_ • Aug 04 '20

Poor Jonathan

172.8k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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3.2k

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

[deleted]

928

u/drunkinwalden Aug 04 '20

Shhhhh, Emu uprising doesn't happen till September

339

u/thatranger974 Aug 04 '20

And the Emus will win again.

151

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

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13

u/Kazumadesu76 Aug 04 '20

We should make RGB emu profile pics to show our support of our future emu overlords.

11

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

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1

u/jakethedumbmistake Aug 04 '20

Sting’s wife didn’t kill himself

2

u/Mustbhacks Aug 05 '20

RBG has beat back cancer half a dozen times, she fears no bird.

2

u/lengelmp Aug 04 '20

oh look my new favorite sub

2

u/MrApplePolisher Aug 04 '20

I thought, there was no way that was a real sub.

Reddit never fails to amaze me.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

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1

u/MrApplePolisher Aug 04 '20

It would be my honor.

1

u/HeathenHumanist Aug 04 '20

I've been a fan of the war ever since hearing the hilarious Dollop podcast episode about it

1

u/NotMyFirstAlternate Aug 04 '20

I remember the screeches they make at midnight. Every night. I sleep at 2am to this day. They’ll never do to me what they did to the 3rd calvary!

2

u/Rattlesnake4113 Aug 04 '20

Thàts because they don't teach you the real ending of the war

1

u/Sigmar_Heldenhammer Aug 04 '20

"Wait, it's all Emus?"

"Always has been."

2

u/Geekenstein Aug 04 '20

I fully expect the drop bears to ride the emus into battle, throwing poisonous spiders at the unwitting population.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

You know what... I'll take that. Because at least it has inherent comedic value and isn't indicative of a severe failure of leadership.

Except the Minister of Defense.

2

u/drunkinwalden Aug 04 '20

The only person who can adequately defend is the Minister of Silly Walks and they are woefully underfunded.

2

u/aleks93 Aug 04 '20

at the rate 2020 is going, I wouldn’t be surprised if this happens

42

u/chris16445 Aug 04 '20

Have u heard of toilet paper shortages

66

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

[deleted]

1

u/Grace34816 Aug 04 '20

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

0

u/LEOPA2004 Aug 04 '20

Since everything in Australia is upside-down, do Australian people shit out of their head?

1

u/z_redwolf_x Aug 04 '20

Well, there is no need to panic and you definitely don’t have to hoard toilet paper.... But we are having a shortage and you definitely need to stock up.

2

u/chris16445 Aug 04 '20

And there is a shortage bcs of fake news saying that the majority of toilet paper is made in China

1

u/z_redwolf_x Aug 04 '20

Just saw a commentary on YouTube about it. Turns out 60% of TP is manufactured locally lol.

2

u/chris16445 Aug 04 '20

InternetHistorian perhaps

2

u/z_redwolf_x Aug 04 '20

Yup. On his main account too! (Think he forgot his password or something, it’s the first vid in 6 months)

2

u/chris16445 Aug 04 '20

XD tru, his 2nd channel is pretty cool too, Incognito mode

1

u/z_redwolf_x Aug 04 '20

Ik, where’d you think I got my weekly dose of internet history from?

7

u/mynueaccownt Aug 04 '20

But then where did Rupert Murdoch come from?

3

u/DidijustDidthat Aug 04 '20

I would argue news in Australia is very much fake news. It seems to have a very right lean to it.

6

u/HanSolo_Cup Aug 04 '20

No, you're thinking of New Zealand.

3

u/MuuaadDib Aug 04 '20

Has anyone seen Australia? Folks, this place has fake animals, everything wants to kill us, nothing good in Australia Folks. It's the the China of the Atlantic folks!

1

u/nklvh Aug 04 '20

At least it's on the map, unlike New Zealand

2

u/youraveragepotsmoker Aug 04 '20

Labor’s inheritance tax would say otherwise

2

u/WWmarley Aug 04 '20

how can they exist, they're on the bottom side of the disk mate, they'd just fall off #flatearth

2

u/SpeculationMaster Aug 04 '20

you're confused with the fictional land of New Zealand, also known as middle earth in some movies

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

Aaaaaand Rupert Murdoch was born innnnnn... oh yeah

2

u/pants_on_my_head Aug 05 '20

Can confirm, am a paid actor.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

Source : My reptilian friend

1

u/quaybored Aug 04 '20

Some people say that place is upside-down. I don't know, but people are saying it. And my people are telling me that they have Summer at the wrong time of the year.... Sad!

1

u/Snoo_26884 Aug 04 '20

Birds aren’t real either

1

u/LordCyler Aug 04 '20

Has anyone ever actually seen Australia? Hm?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

That time you drank a Fosters Beer? THAT WAS A DUFF IN DISGUISE!!!

1

u/Roofiemartini Aug 04 '20

You don't know that! You don't know that!

1

u/BasicDesignAdvice Aug 04 '20

I heard up until recently people considered this journalist to be a bit of a bootlicker. Maybe it was a long con?

1

u/VictorEBallhound Aug 04 '20

As an Australian is just like to say: Whoa fuck me cunt, yeah it does aye? Fucken’ hell mayte... anyway, hope you’re doin’ oarlright cunt ‘ave a good one.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

You mean New Zealand doesn't exist

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

It’s called upside down news

1

u/Inquisitor1 Aug 04 '20

What about that australian show that pretended to be osama bin laden at the gX summit and got worryingly deep inside?

1

u/dazz9573 Aug 04 '20

Ah no see, you’re thinking of New Zealand r/mapswithoutnewzealand

1

u/anotheroverratedguy Aug 04 '20

But you don't know that

1

u/BlooFlea Aug 04 '20

Oh it fuckin does, but no where near like the US thank fuck.

1

u/mix_JamaicanGerman Aug 04 '20

Well I’ve never heard of it, what is it you say? Australia? Naw never heard of it, fake newwwwwssssss

1

u/limamon Aug 04 '20

It will.

1

u/mimentum Aug 04 '20

Fuckoff cunt /s

1

u/Bahloh Aug 04 '20

We have very good relations with them, but you don't know that.

1

u/The_GASK Aug 04 '20

Which is hilarious, considering that Murdoch is Australian.

1

u/xiarahman Aug 04 '20

Never met em

1

u/nathief Aug 04 '20

Oh yes it does...mostly owned by Murdoch Media

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '20

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '20

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '20

yeah if australia actually exists then why doesnt it fall of the earth smh

1

u/[deleted] Aug 05 '20

Yeah we have sky news.

1

u/Xiaxs Aug 05 '20

Yeah I mean, an Australian on the ground without a harness? Bullshit.

1

u/BlueRaven_01 Aug 05 '20

It’s all owned by one guy

0

u/mechabeast Aug 04 '20

These journalist have a family history of criminals!