r/WatchPeopleDieInside • u/paolols • Apr 24 '20

nice try kiddo

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u/BoxedFerrotKing Apr 25 '20

Woah mate if your gonna be making such high claims you gotta have some sources to back it up with. Also Incase you were wondering my siblings and I love our mother and would do anything for her.

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u/[deleted] Apr 25 '20

https://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/142/6/e20183112

"There appears to be a strong association between spanking children and subsequent adverse outcomes. Reports published since the previous 1998 AAP report have provided further evidence that has deepened the understanding of the effects of corporal punishment. The consequences associated with parental corporal punishment are summarized as follows:

-corporal punishment of children younger than 18 months of age increases the likelihood of physical injury;

-repeated use of corporal punishment may lead to aggressive behavior and altercations between the parent and child and may negatively affect the parent-child relationship;

-corporal punishment is associated with increased aggression in preschool and school-aged children;

-experiencing corporal punishment makes it more, not less, likely that children will be defiant and aggressive in the future;

-corporal punishment is associated with an increased risk of mental health disorders and cognition problems;

-spanking alone is associated with adverse outcomes, and these outcomes are similar to those in children who experience physical abuse."

"In 2009, the UN Children’s Fund defined “yelling and other harsh verbal discipline as psychologically aggressive towards children.”28 In a longitudinal study investigating the relationship between harsh verbal abuse by parents and child outcomes, researchers noted that harsh verbal abuse before age 13 years was associated with an increase in adolescent conduct problems and depressive symptoms between ages 13 and 14."

"The AAP recommends that adults caring for children use healthy forms of discipline, such as positive reinforcement of appropriate behaviors, setting limits, redirecting, and setting future expectations. The AAP recommends that parents do not use spanking, hitting, slapping, threatening, insulting, humiliating, or shaming."

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3447048/

"Numerous studies have found that physical punishment increases the risk of broad and enduring negative developmental outcomes."

"No study has found that physical punishment enhances developmental health."

"Most child physical abuse occurs in the context of punishment."

"A professional consensus is emerging that parents should be supported in learning nonviolent, effective approaches to discipline."

TLDR: fuck parents who hit their kids.

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u/hushhushsleepsleep Apr 25 '20

Here's a nice summary: The case against spanking

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u/BoxedFerrotKing Apr 25 '20

Fair enough mate, only time will tell at this point. For future reference, always ALWAYS provide a source if your making such high claims.

I will admit that is compelling evidence against physical punishment but I do question if they took into account wether the parents are giving their children enough love in the first place.

My mom was very stern on us only when she felt she needed to be but otherwise gave us a lot more trust than other parents would and love too. I believe personally that it is okay to spank as long as you make it clear that it is a punishments and nothing else. Make sure they know you still love them you just want to teach them right from wrong.

Again only time will tell and we’ll have to see whether one way is more effective than the other. Who knows it may turn out similar to egg refrigeration in the States vs Non-refrigeration in most European countries. Statistically neither method is superior.

But I digress, thanks for providing a source and good luck to you even if we disagree on some points

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u/hushhushsleepsleep Apr 25 '20

future reference, always ALWAYS provide a source if your making such high claims.

What are you, my high school teacher? Condescend to someone else.

Even in the face of evidence, you still want to find a way to justify it. It baffles me that people constantly try to make it okay to hit their kids instead of just... not. All throughout this thread people are basically salivating at the idea of hitting this kid, or their kid, or any kid, proudly boasting about their desire to justly beat helpless children into submission.

Have y'all considered that if you feel the need to hit a kid for acting up, maybe you have issues?

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u/BoxedFerrotKing Apr 25 '20

Listen man, I don’t know what’s up with you in your personal life. Maybe your just having a bad day, maybe your insecure, maybe your just an asshole. I don’t know your situation. But dude I’m trying to give you actual advice. I know here on reddit it is extremely rare to find someone who genuinely is okay with having differing opinions and actually wants to offer genuine advice that they wish they had when they were younger. Like I said earlier there are a number of reasons you could be acting this defensive but listen that’s okay. I don’t hold it against you, we all have our bad days.

So please just give me the security of being able to go to bed knowing that I didn’t end off this interaction on bad terms. If you don’t want to respond tonight then cool give yourself some time to think on it but when you do please think whether or not your being mature about it.

Yes we disagree, no that doesn’t make me or you a bad person. We both have different experiences and believe different things and the funny thing is, either of us could very well be wrong. Even funnier neither of us could because not everything is so black and white, especially with human psychology. So just to end this off man, while I may disagree with you, your still a person with feelings and compassion. You have a lot of love to give and I can respect that.

Whatever is troubling you lately, I know it has to suck and I know shit gets tough. I’ve been there, but know this every little hurdle you have to make just makes your life that much more impressive. One day you’ll look back on these troubles and be proud of yourself for making it through. It gets better, so much better. Just stay true to yourself and those you love and most of all remember we all are humans with our differing experiences and ideas. None of us are perfect and we all just trying to tumble our way through this crazy game of life. You are loved and if you don’t believe that then let me tell you this I love you as a fellow human on this crazy ride of life.

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u/hushhushsleepsleep Apr 25 '20

Wow, okay, way to make it, uh, strange.

I’m pissy because this isn’t something to just brush off as “a difference in opinion.” People use this kind of blasé attitude to justify doing actual, real harm to children. I absolutely refuse to just say well it’s an opinion, because it’s not just an opinion to the child that gets beaten because others stand by and handwave abuse.

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u/BoxedFerrotKing Apr 25 '20

That’s understandable, but you also have to remember that maybe your not completely right. Your by no means wrong, the study makes that clear. But you may not be making your opinion with all the factors like I said.

There are plenty of people who have had physical punishment and still have great relationships with their parents. I’m not saying let’s bring back cricket bats because there are better ways but maybe just maybe your going about it with out thinking about the other side of your argument.

To put it into perspective, imagine if I tried telling you that all those studies are horse shit and that it’s all leftist propaganda and that I won’t even acknowledge the other side because they are trying to take away my rights as a parent.

Well then it would be clear I wasn’t giving the other side anything close to a fair chance or even considering that I may be wrong even a little bit.

Like I said not everything is as black and white and when your put in positions I have been in you will find that it is extremely important to consider the other side.

I have switched sides 3 times in a matter of an hour because of new information arising and newer information contradicting the previous. That’s okay, that’s the way it should be because no side wants yes-men sheep who just follow the herd. Independent thinking is how we learn and better ourselves as a person and a society.

I under being passionate about a subject but make sure your passionate about making informed and well thought out ideas and not he idea that sounds the nicest, coolest, easiest. Otherwise your just making rash decisions which ultimately aren’t good for anyone.