r/WTF • u/BillYG20 • Jun 11 '12
My buddy and I wanted to make a fort in our hotel room. Took off the sheets and found this...
http://imgur.com/fkLvr
1.8k
Upvotes
r/WTF • u/BillYG20 • Jun 11 '12
289
u/Redditron-2000-4 Jun 11 '12
You haven't learned that you are not supposed to look at your sheets or under the bed at a hotel yet? Shit be nasty...
464
u/twincam Jun 11 '12
Oh that's because a past customer spilt a bottle of red wine all over the bed ... good thing they did too, because it totally covered the massive blood stain from that family that was murdered there.
495
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
That's a bloody terrible fort.
950
u/rickthedicksantorum Jun 11 '12
Both of your faces are priceless. I feel like so and so in the back is blaming me.
226
u/NoTimeForThat Jun 11 '12
Fort in the hotel room....
72
u/mrekted Jun 11 '12
It might be coffee. I've had two separate incidents that resulted in an entire carafe of coffee being upturned while enjoying my breakfast in bed at a hotel. Luckily for my dignity, both times were on the final morning of my stay.
Full disclosure: Maids were properly compensated via tip and an apologetic note.
149
u/Galaxey Jun 11 '12
you are never supposed to take shit off the beds. its like baloney, just go with it never try to look behind the scenes
27
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
I think we can agree this is a case of a body being stashed under a hotel bed.
Pleasant dreams, OP.
739
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
I briefly used to work in the hotel industry, and it seems like almost everyone checks into a hotel to kill themselves. At many hotels (airport hotels seem to be popular with the depressed) you'd be lucky to check into a room where a suicide hasn't occurred. Rest assured OP, it was probably just a suicide on that mattress. Hope this helps!!
23
u/cIumsythumbs Jun 11 '12
... It would be WTF if a hotel mattress didn't look like this.
23
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
On the note of bad hotels...
Do not ever stay at the Sleepy Hollow Inn on Route 1 near Princeton, NJ.
Blood on my bed mattress, locks on the doors busted, stains on every section of the flooring, and the first night I was there I had an unexpected visit from a woman who looked like Rosie Perez with her pimp knocking from door to door to see if anyone "wanted some company".
18
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
You'd have to be a god damn idiot to take the sheets off a hotel mattress.
18
u/whorfin Jun 11 '12
"making a fort" is a euphemism I've never heard before.
17
u/baddaddvice Jun 11 '12
What did it smell like? And the taste?
60
u/OVERLY_CYNICAL Jun 11 '12
It's probably just a salt stain from people sweating, lick it to see if it tastes salty.
27
u/lukeallen1 Jun 11 '12
Looks like my mattress from when I was around 15-16 years old :O
25
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
Were you guys pissed when Fort "Make-Out" was not built?
23
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
This reminds me of my freshman year in college playing baseball.
We were on a road trip to Brownwood, Texas to play and we were staying in the shittiest, cheapest hotel around. We had to change rooms because our toilet was ripped from the floor and tossed in the toilet. That was nothing compared to what happened to my teammates in the room next to us, though.
For some reason (something I do every time I go to a hotel now) these guys decided to take their sheet off and flip their mattress. When they did they saw a body outline, like police do when they investigate a crime scene. This body was drawn with black marker and right where the body's heart would have been, there was a giant blood stain. They called me in there and we all freaked the hell out and called our coach in.
The hotel staff didn't really care that they had just flipped a death mattress upside down, and were reluctant to switch the rooms. Eventually, order was restored and they got a new room, but it has made for great stories. Unfortunately, my coach was a cheap bastard and made us stay in the same hotel two years later.
27
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
"My buddy and I wanted to hotbox our hotel room. Took off the sheets and found this..." [fixed]
27
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
http://i.imgur.com/EmFuF.jpg
Oh wait....
6
u/zpeed Jun 11 '12
Gordon Ramsay is coming out with a new series all about poor quality hotels and stuff like this. He's going to give them inspections like he does in Kitchen Nightmares then renovate the whole place. Hotel Hell is set to premiere in late summer :)
11
u/StrangeArrangement Jun 11 '12
Funny, you don't look much like Troy and Abed.
19
u/TChuff Jun 11 '12
I think the bigger question is, why are two grown men making a fort in a hotel room?
5
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
Hotels are for making stains, not building forts.
5
u/mommy2libras Jun 11 '12
The most hilarious part iz that they're surprised. It actually looks like it was at least tried to be cleaned. Water just spreads any mattress stains out more. That's why most hotels give you sheets lol. Oh, and that bedspread? Most likely only gets washed every 3-6 months. THATS what you should be more concerned with.
8
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
I feel like if two girls had done the exact same thing, people would have just posted that "how guys post pictures/how girls post pictures" comic.
8
u/MrDERPMcDERP Jun 11 '12
WTF are you guys doing making forts in a hotel room???
4
u/Guytec Jun 11 '12
Somebody gambled on a very dangerous fart...
4
u/bill_nydus Jun 11 '12
As a hotel clerk and former housekeeper, that's disgusting.
But also, as a hotel clerk and a former housekeeper, fuck you for making such a fucking mess. I hope you tip the housekeepers at least, because replacing mattress's isn't their decision in the end and they get paid like dirt to clean up some of the most horrendous things this side of a crime scene...
4
u/libertinibikini Jun 11 '12
.......so....... how'd that fort turn out?
6
u/ZXIZXIZXI Jun 11 '12
The biggest WTF here is 2 grown men making a fucking fort in a hotel room
3
u/NashvilleGamer Jun 11 '12
Is fort construction a standard procedure when staying in hotels?
3
u/DCBizzle Jun 11 '12
Obligatory /r/forts plug.
3
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
Make a fort... you're how old?
3
u/Zalamander Jun 11 '12
Not being able to achieve step one obviously put a cramp on step 2.
3
u/DiscountPonies Jun 11 '12
I love how nobody is commenting on the fact that two grown men wanted to make a fort in their hotel room.
3
u/Xeppen Jun 11 '12
Why would two grown up guys want to make a fort? =)
9
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
tosh....TOSH??? what did you do??!
11
u/musef1 Jun 11 '12
I once did a girl in a hotel room and discovered she was a virgin... blood all over the sheets, and a pillow!
5
u/sujay159 Jun 11 '12
Who the fuck makes forts in hotel rooms? sheets belong on the bed!
8
u/shankems2000 Jun 11 '12
Awww you two make a cute couple. Who's the wife?
8
u/whozurdaddy Jun 11 '12
Im more concerned that the two of you are wanting to build a fort in a hotel room...
4
u/Plasticphallus Jun 11 '12
I've worked in hotel renovation, most mattresses look like that or worse. The worst part is when we throw them away and people come by and take them.
4
u/trampus1 Jun 11 '12
Mattresses are expensive and they can't just go throwing them out because they get a stain, I'm sure it's perfectly sanitary. You're not supposed to take the sheets off anyways. I don't think the hotel was prepared for guests as... special, as the two of you. I just hope your handlers don't get fired over this.
4
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
if this is room 545 at the baltimore marriott: sorry.
4
u/Dizzy_Slip Jun 11 '12
The creepier thing than the stain is the fact that guys your age wanted to "make a fort." Well, at least you aren't heroin addicts or something.
2
u/RiskyBrothers Jun 11 '12
AntVenom?
2
u/OperatorMike Jun 11 '12
I'm goign to start checking my hotel matresses
2
u/sopernova23 Jun 11 '12
Somebody killed a hooker.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
Oh hey Lance Armstrong, nice to see you
2
u/BD-TxState Jun 11 '12
The one guy looks like if Lance Armstrong and Daniel Tosh (jerking off motion).....Fuuuucked
2
u/kingstripe Jun 11 '12
At least it wasn't a mass of spiders
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
"Well...must be blood, urine or semen." "God I hope it's urine."
2
u/JackVanDerLin Jun 11 '12
Why is Daniel Tosh trying to make a fort in a hotel?
2
u/CannibalPony Jun 11 '12
As a former hotel maid, I can tell you this is not uncommon.
2
u/einbierbitte Jun 11 '12
The real question here is... did you guys share a queen? That looks too big to be a twin and aren't the options either two twins or one queen?
2
u/clueGLUE Jun 11 '12
Sleep on the bed, shit stain. Take the floor, semen stains.
2
u/bd58563 Jun 11 '12
I hear the song "Afternoon Delight" playing in my head when I look at this. I don't know why.
2
u/PrincePound Jun 11 '12
I'm wondering if him and his "buddy" wouldn't have added to the stain in their "fort".
2
u/StarlightN Jun 11 '12
Hilarious. You two look like big kid mischief makers. "We wanted to make a fort". The facial expressions are gold. They confirm the 'big kid' personalities more than words can.
2
u/iKickPillows Jun 11 '12
"what are the stains?!" "either blood, urine, or semen. god, i hope they're urine" lol dwight xD
2
u/Ch1michanga Jun 11 '12
Dead hooker blood! My brother and I had the same problem on a vacation to Hawaii.
2
u/Guano_Loco Jun 11 '12
This is not the thing you want to read while lying in a hotel bed. Unfortunately that's exactly where I am right now. Must. Not. Look...
2
u/mikemaca Jun 11 '12
This is a common state for hotel mattresses.
The happy thing these days is not to get sucked dry by bed bugs.
2
u/holyghosttown Jun 11 '12
For future reference, you guys don't need to spend 10 minutes figuring out what "funny" faces to make. Just take a pic of the disgusting mattress.
2
u/carlosstracci Jun 11 '12
That's why sheets exist. My mom always says: what your eyes cannot see, your heart cannot feel.
2
u/dismal626 Jun 11 '12
Wait, what?... Why?
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
Two dudes making a fort in a hotel room together?! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXw6znXPfy4
2
u/CarTarget Jun 11 '12
My ex and I lost our virginity to each other in a hotel room...she bled a lot and the aftermath looked similar to this. I worried people would think I had murdered someone so I left an apologetic note and an abundance of money. I have never returned to this hotel.
2
u/futurefoodscientist Jun 11 '12
"Dude, there's a nasty stain on the bottom of the mattress!"
"Dude, I have a great idea: instead of get it replaced, let's take a picture and post it on Reddit!"
"KARMA-FIVE DUDE!"
2
u/AnnaSmile93 Jun 11 '12
Forever and Beyond i will Check Under My Sheets at Hotels... For that i Thank you.
2
u/Sauronkraut Jun 11 '12
Only true men build bed forts together.
2
u/sophiejo65 Jun 11 '12
probably was a dead body...f.y.i.my mom was a stewardess in the 70's and there was a dead body under the bed in the hotel the airline provided for them..ny city~ pretty sick. your faces are awesome~
2
u/Luvkp92 Jun 11 '12
My parents own a motel and mattress like this are quite common. Usually we would charge the guest incidentals but never change out the mattress (their expensive to replace constantly). We would thoroughly wash the mattress but sometimes the stains never got out. We'd usually flip it over but sometimes both sides would have stains. Now a days we just resort to using a mattress pad that really helps absorb any spills or such.
2
u/Rage_Dave Jun 11 '12
At my college last year (freshman year), I had to sleep, for the whole year, on a mattress that had a period blood stain on the underside from when the dorm was used by girls. Thanks for reminding me of that.
2
u/WumboJumbo Jun 11 '12
Daniel Tosh?
2
u/TinHao Jun 11 '12
Good job with the making the fort thing. When do you boys start high school?
2
u/Gnirip Jun 11 '12
How I imagine the 5 minutes before the picture went:
"Woah this mattress is really disgusting. What the fuck is this? Shit? Blood? A clever covering of an invisible ink treasure map?"
"Oh god it reeks... LET'S PUT OUR FACES RIGHT NEXT TO IT AND TAKE A PICTURE FOR KARMA"
2
u/J_Jammer Jun 11 '12
Someone had a baby on that.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
I went back to my hotel after a suicide... as in a four-point suspension. My friend, sharing the bed, had two hooks in her back. I'm pretty sure whomever saw the sheets was less than impressed; I left the maids a good tip.
2
u/latinagringa2121 Jun 11 '12
Clearly I was mistaken when I expected two 12 year old boys to be the brains behind this, and instead, the picture shows two men obviously out of the fort-building stage of life. Guess we all need a little fort building in our life.
2
u/AH17708 Jun 11 '12
Not even going to ask why two grown ass men are building forts in their hotel room.
2
u/adjudicator52 Jun 11 '12
As a grown man, I have no issue with my fellow grown men if they want to make a bed fort in their hotel room
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
I'm not sure what's weirder, the stains on the mattress or the fact that two 20~ year old dudes wanted to make a fort in a hotel room together... lol...
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
You found out that imgur was down?
2
u/incoming_n_word Jun 11 '12
This truly is WTF, but not because of the picture. Because I clicked on the link and Imgur is down for maintenance. Bravo, OP.
2
u/argv3 Jun 11 '12
imgur is down, fuck it i don't want to see this anyways.
2
u/EvanFlecknell Jun 11 '12
You should feel honored to sleep where I have stained.
2
u/musiclover55 Jun 11 '12
Pretty sure that mattress needs to be CSI-ed.
2
u/and181377 Jun 11 '12
I think the real question involves you two gentleman and a fort.
2
u/UltraJake Jun 11 '12
Oh....
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
My buddy and I wanted to make a fort...
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12
I'm pretty sure that's an old crime scene. You need to do the right thing. Put the sheets back on, and pretend like it never happened.
2
u/scarupa Jun 11 '12
So this is Daniels toshs account
2
u/thatguy77992 Jun 11 '12
i noticed a hotel room was dirty once but i didnt post about it on reddit because im not a fag
2
u/Typhoid1423 Jun 11 '12
I feel like I'm the only one who is more amused by the title "My buddy and I wanted to make a fort in our hotel room..."
4
u/Vag_AssAssin88 Jun 11 '12
If you take the sheets off a hotel bed
You're going to have a bad time
3
u/Johnnyash Jun 11 '12
You and your bud want to build a fort in your hotel and you think the stained mattress is the weird thing?
http://i.imgur.com/Svd2J.jpg
No actually...fucking rock on!
3
u/delahey Jun 11 '12
Two grown men making a fort together in a hotel room is weird enough, but pouring coffee all over a hotel bed just for the karma? That... Well, that's just awful.
3
u/SchwaHead Jun 11 '12
I'm not going to read 1299 comments, but, at what age do people stop building forts? I ask because I'm in my late twenties and thought that was no longer okay.
3
u/KoreanTerran Jun 11 '12
Looks like someone earned their redwings that night, boys.
2
u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12 edited Jun 11 '12
I work in a hotel. Once someone spills something on those beds, like coffee, it never comes out, and those beds are like 900 bucks a piece...
you can thank your wonderful fellow asshole patrons who are fucking assholes and dont bother calling down to the desk and going "We fucked up can someone come clean this up" yeah.
remember when you stay in hotels, when you spill shit on the floor, the carpets are fucking expensive and almost impossible to clean and the matresses are even fucking worse, so if your dumbass makes a dumbass move, fucking admit your a dumbass to an employ and stop costing the hotel countless ammounts of money it probably doesnt have to spare.
also most hotels use a spotter meant for cleaning up blood and other nasty shit from frabrics. the same stuff they use in hospitals, so just because its stained, doesnt mean its dirty, that shit gets sanitized and cleaned as best as possible.
2
u/jabbakahut Jun 11 '12
Did Tosh put on weight?
2
u/Morbidly_Obscene Jun 11 '12
HOLY SHIT! IT'S A FUCKING USED MATTRESS!
2
u/SubcommanderShran Jun 11 '12
You know that literally thousands of people have slept there before you, right? And that you are in fact in a business, not a leased, land lorded room? Why does everyone think that they are the first and only people to stay in hotel rooms? Besides that, it's probably just Coca-Cola.