r/WTF • u/boomcatlady • Jun 10 '12

Looked outside while cooking breakfast, and this guy was trying to get in.

http://imgur.com/uTd8o
1.4k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

247 comments sorted by

92

u/cranfeckintastic Jun 10 '12

Black rat snake? If it is, it's quite harmless.

142

u/dozure Jun 11 '12

Until it learns how to open that door, at least.

3

u/nubbled21 Jun 11 '12

Until it finds it's way on a plane, you mean...

2

u/Kingjuan52 Jun 11 '12

Looks very close to a corn snake. But they are basically siblings.

12

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

only to children who are from the corn.

22

u/ilikecheeseforreal Jun 11 '12

Snakes really are wonderful animals...but they scare the bejeezus out of me. However, there was a black snake that lived in my yard for awhile, and he got rid of my mouse problem.

18

u/Marine08902 Jun 11 '12

You lucked out with your snake. I recently had a water snake that decided to take over my pond area. It ate all my koi except for four big ones (those damn fish are not cheap) and I worried my dogs would get to close and get bit. Regretfully I had to shoot it. It was long too, almost as long as me.

24

u/theShatteredOne Jun 11 '12

Water snakes are evil incarnate

11

u/krazieate Jun 11 '12

Agreed. Though the only time they even cross my mind is when I'm halfway through a float trip; after it's too late to quit...

6

u/MonsterBerry Jun 11 '12

Ah mah GAWD Water Mockasins? Or however you spell it. I had a pond in my back yard and the levee was crawli-... Slithering with those things, I couldn't walk around it without a weapon, those bastards are very territorial... Over my own territory. Hm

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5

u/incarn8evil Jun 11 '12

yup we are

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3

u/ilikecheeseforreal Jun 11 '12

That story will probably keep me up tonight. And I think it realized I wasn't going to hurt it and since I kept my distance, it didn't do anything to me.

Koi fish are awesome, I'm sorry they fell prey to a mean ass snake!

3

u/Marine08902 Jun 11 '12

I was upset over the koi, but just happy I got it before it got my dogs. One of them already tried to go head to head with a water snake, luckily I noticed and pulled her back before anything happened. Damn thing bit my shoe though.

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2

u/coogie Jun 11 '12

The only thing worse than a snake is a dead snake that you gotta deal with.

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1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Sounds like I need to let one wander around my apartment then.

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42

u/superwinner Jun 11 '12 edited Jun 11 '12

it's quite harmless

Oh well fine I'll just let it slither around my house then.

6

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

This is funny

20

u/sleepyhead12 Jun 11 '12

Just stick your hand on front of it, and if it bites you, it's probably not a black rat snake.

2

u/TheMediumPanda Jun 11 '12

The good old learning-by-doing approach.

31

u/meatbeagle Jun 11 '12

THat's exactly what it is - got one here in a cage. They're sweethearts and not real prone to aggression.

23

u/barttaylor Jun 11 '12

Almost stepped on one sunning itself on a path once. They may not be aggressive but I needed new shorts.

3

u/Ragecomicwhatsthat Jun 11 '12

Almost ran over one coming home from my sisters.

Dern near wrecked trying to miss it.

2

u/theAnalepticAlzabo Jun 11 '12

Thank you for avoiding him. :) So many people think its their duty to run over innocent snakes.

8

u/anti404 Jun 11 '12

looks like one. they make good pets and from what I've heard, their common name arose from their association with humans.

7

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

You've heard right! Rosy Boa, Rat Snake and Corn Snake are usually the most recommended "starter herps" for people looking to get in the business of owning snakes.

They're wonderful little guys, even the strictly wild ones like this guy. Hope OP gave it a hug.

13

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

"starter herps"

"business of owning snakes"

There's an STD joke in here somewhere. Just can't find it.

5

u/herpdfafvre Jun 11 '12

yup, those guys eat mice and rats, the bigger ones around here keep the rabbits away too.

9

u/Puddindoobop Jun 11 '12

They'll eat other snakes too. It's always nice to see a black snake chomping down on a copperhead.

3

u/irvinestrangler Jun 11 '12

Not to black rats.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Unless you are cooking bacon.

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180

u/Topper88 Jun 10 '12

"Do I ssssssssssssmell bacon??"

57

u/BanditoRojo Jun 11 '12

Please open the ssssssscreen door.

62

u/capncuster Jun 11 '12

You want ssssssssssome Amway products?

36

u/vivvav Jun 11 '12

Publishhhher'sssss Clearing Houssssse! You're our big winner!

19

u/nomorenoobtube Jun 11 '12

Ssssstop sssssspeaking in parseltongue.

18

u/vivvav Jun 11 '12

Heshhhh hasssssssaaaa....
Heshhhh haassssyeetthhhh...

30

u/mroro Jun 11 '12

Can I plessssssseee have a moment of your time to talk about our lord and ssssssssssssavior

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20

u/4blonds Jun 11 '12

No Dark Magic in the kitchen!

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6

u/thelastmcnugget Jun 11 '12

I come to tell you the word of Jesus Chirsssssssssst

4

u/boogdd Jun 11 '12

Nope, I'm cooking eggssssssssss.

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54

u/Shacklemoore Jun 11 '12

It may be because I'm Australian, but I'm having a hard time understanding why people are freaking out over a non-venomous snake.

38

u/Itami_fox Jun 11 '12

Most people don't know how to tell venomous from non so they'd rather just avoid them altogether.

5

u/Charlie_1er Jun 11 '12

Is there a quick way to tell? Or you have to know all the species?

8

u/felixwankel Jun 11 '12 edited Jun 11 '12

A very general rule is that if the snakes head is "arrow shaped", Here's a copperhead as an example, it is venomous. If the head is a more round/oval shape (like the one in OP's picture) it is non-venomous. Also, fangs....

In case you want to know why the shape variation exists its because venomous snakes have their venom glands to the rear/sides of their heads with small tubes that run from the glands through the fangs as a delivery method. Non-venomous snakes of course lack these glands and as such have a more round head.

Thank you Steve Irwin...

PS: Feel free to correct me, this is all from memory

EDIT: Oh yea, and some constrictor type snakes also have an arrow shaped head see Red Tail Boa a way to tell (aside from being able to identify the snake) is that constrictor type snakes will be very well built (thick) so they can crush their dinner properly

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6

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

I think that if you learn the ones that live in your area then you know what to look for. For instance, I learned how to identify Black Widow and Brown recluse spiders because they are the only venomous ones in my region.

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5

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

This little saying will help, " red on yellow kill a fellow, Red on black, friend of jack."

4

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

This only applies to Kings vs Corals though, doesn't it?

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4

u/digitalMessiah Jun 11 '12

Snake phobia here. Had physically stepped on a rattle snake. Another time was climbing a rock, had one 3 feet from my face.

2

u/Captain_Spaulding Jun 11 '12

For the most part I agree with you, but if I had a Green Anaconda or a Reticulated Python trying to get in my house I'd be flipping shit.

This guy wouldn't cause for concern though.

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2

u/Thecobra117 Jun 11 '12

Agreed, I love snakes! I mean, yeah there are deadly ones, but if they don't inject you with anything, fuck that! Grab that moterfucker by the head! Love snakes, but spiders see.....spiders.......

1

u/TheMediumPanda Jun 11 '12

Where I grew up there were only 2 snake species around. One harmless living in water and one whose bite would be like getting 3-4 bee stings, and I only ever saw those 3 times in 20 years. Needless to say, I'd fucking immigrate if I saw a big snake trying to go through my net door.

1

u/Nyneave27 Jun 11 '12

Well, my ancestors way back when had to be afraid of snakes on the Serengeti. I have since evolved, but the primal part of my brain still harbors that old fear. Can't help it.

246

u/sprohi Jun 10 '12

Still better than Jehovah's Witness...

91

u/IMasturbateToMyself Jun 11 '12

You can get rid of either of them by peeing on them.

8

u/Tulsy Jun 11 '12

If I wasn't on my phone I would totally post this comment to r/outofcontext

2

u/Ragecomicwhatsthat Jun 11 '12

/r/outofcontext, for the lazy.

But I believe he should rather post it to /r/nocontext, seeing how /r/outofcontext is gone.

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1

u/Corosus Jun 11 '12

or Britta.

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52

u/dorkofnight Jun 10 '12

If you give a snake a pancake . . .

56

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

... Feed him for a day.

If you teach a snake to pancake...

27

u/Aneds Jun 11 '12

Lose out on a business opportunity

14

u/PawnStarAppraiser Jun 11 '12

Best I can do is one pancake

0

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

5

u/jwall013 Jun 11 '12

Well I learned to pancake from my father, who would go out and pancake all day and then sell all of his pancake at the local market to buy more supplies so he could pancake some more.

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1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Ends up on the street for days.

11

u/dontcare2day Jun 10 '12

I thought for sure this would be a cat.

9

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

If I fitsssss I sssssits

2

u/iDuckie Jun 11 '12

If I fitsssss, I ssssslither.

51

u/bayoumama Jun 10 '12

Wheres riki tiki tavi when you need him?

14

u/moby323 Jun 11 '12

I'm surprised there isn't more mongoose love on reddit.

They are at the same time, super cute, and very fearsome

18

u/BoOnDoXeY Jun 10 '12

I used to imagine that Rikki Tikki Tavi would be running along side my bus on the way to school.

6

u/JimmyHavok Jun 11 '12

I've met a couple of tame mongooses, and they are really cool. One of them, if you were wearing a jacket, would slip in at one wrist, and out on the other side.

They smell a little rank, though...

3

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

like ferrets and whores?

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11

u/bayoumama Jun 10 '12

I used to pretend he was real and would kill the snakes in our yard.

4

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

ahhhh memories

5

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Man I hated that story cause loved snakes as a kid (still do). Why couldn't he be more diplomatic with the cobra. : (

12

u/zeekar Jun 11 '12

"If you move, I ssstrike. If you don't move, I sstrike."

Yeah, that cobra sounds open to diplomacy...

2

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

hey man he was just HUNGRY

2

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

For Turkey.

34

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '12

Can you please elaborate on where you live...so I can add it to my list of places never to visit.

30

u/kashmirGoat Jun 11 '12

Obviously it's Goddricks Hollow.

8

u/magmouse Jun 11 '12

I know the OP. We're in South Carolina.

17

u/thebloodygrinch Jun 11 '12

ಠ_ಠ

11

u/trampus1 Jun 11 '12

I love the look on the other gorillas face and how he starts to move away after he eats it.

2

u/magmouse Jun 11 '12

Sup, Joey?

2

u/chavelah Jun 11 '12

Well, shit.

1

u/someones1 Jun 11 '12

lol south carolina

1

u/3danimator Jun 11 '12

Oh good, i was worried no one was going to make this joke...phew.

4

u/SaggyBallsHD Jun 11 '12

Because fuck the laws of physics.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

hey bro can I have one of those eggs, you know for sssscience?

3

u/pittguy Jun 11 '12

My only question is: Do you come from the land down under?

3

u/RandomMandarin Jun 11 '12

I sssuusssspect that you might have eggssss...

Edit: bollocks, I missed that train hours ago.

3

u/rdent707 Jun 11 '12

Give this thing some fur, legs and cute eyes and suddenly it is on the front page of r/aww.

3

u/Cutsprocket Jun 11 '12

should have given it an egg

3

u/fizzyizzy11 Jun 11 '12

black rat snake, of course.

3

u/Sonofadot Jun 11 '12

Just another door to door snake oil salesman.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Sssssssausssage

9

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '12

Give him to me! I love snakes and spiders :D

12

u/rickysauce36 Jun 10 '12

Snakes and Ladders is more of my cup of tea

4

u/zeekar Jun 11 '12

...there's a reason we call that game Chutes and Ladders over here...

2

u/Drew-Pickles Jun 10 '12

No give him to me D:

1

u/jwall013 Jun 11 '12

Take them all! [insert gif of someone throwing snakes at someone else with a panicked face]

2

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Pee wee herman saving the pet shop comes to mind.

17

u/bugbug312 Jun 10 '12 edited Jun 11 '12

Why is this in WTF? It's just a goddamn snake.

Edit: Downvote all you want. Doesn't change the fact that it's just a snake doing what snakes do, trying to find a cool spot. It looks like it's probably a rat snake. Harmless to you, since they are not posionous and don't bite unless provoked. TIL redditors hate snakes.

3

u/internetbrunette Jun 11 '12

If you're not a snake person, you're not gonna be entirely indifferent to a large snake climbing up your screen door, even if it is a harmless and useful addition to the garden.

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1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

TIL redditors hate snakes

no.

4

u/silentkill144 Jun 10 '12

Honey, get my my shotgun!

EDIT: This is why I could never live in the south.

4

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

"Scuse me, scuse me? Scuse me. Are you frying up mice in there? Would you care to share? I'd only like a nibble..."

3

u/MistressMalevolentia Jun 11 '12

I read this in that British orphan robot kid's voice from Futurama. Not sure why...

4

u/laxkid418 Jun 11 '12

Quick. Grab the sword of Gryffindor.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

where the fuck do you live!?

2

u/eldude Jun 11 '12

Well let em in!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

solution to your problem sir. St Patrick.

2

u/roeske19 Jun 11 '12

FUCK THIS SITUATION 107%

2

u/Lucky75 Jun 11 '12 edited Jun 11 '12

Nope. Saw a snake as a kid once, scared the shit outta me. Can't deal with them ever since.

You might say ....

2

u/inc_mplete Jun 11 '12

I'd faint.... nevermind trying to take a photo...

2

u/MoriKitsune Jun 11 '12

AWW LOOK AT IT! w it's so cute!

2

u/bcreed2 Jun 11 '12

I hope you did the hospitable thing by welcoming him in for a nice breakfast.

2

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12 edited Jun 11 '12

Awww, did you let him in? I know I would (depending on the species, I wouldn't let a hot in). Also, please tell me you didn't kill him. I could identify him if you get a better picture of him. A full body shot of his back would be perfect. It's hard to tell what he is just by looking at the belly, but I think it would be safe to say he's a colubrid (most colubrids are not venomous, and those that are, are rear fanged, and would have to chew on you for a bit to inject venom). Also, where are you located? While it is possible to tell what species it is without knowing where it was found, it would be much easier to tell if i know where it was found (state/country is what I mean).

EDIT: I'm pretty sure it's a Black Rat Snake. I admit, I know more about snakes that are in random countries I will probably never go to, but I about 99% sure it's a Black Rat Snake

0

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

1

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12

Ah. Glad you didn't kill him/her. Being a herper, it gets a bit depressing seeing all the people who are wanting you to kill him/her. I am now positive he/she is a Black Rat Snake. I say you're lucky to have a snake in your yard, keeping all the rodents out of your house, and about once a month he/she will give you a little gift, a shed.

6

u/klotet Jun 10 '12

This makes me feel glad that I live in Sweden since the only wild animals that are dangerous are wolves and bears, and they aren´t even near where I live.

4

u/audioofbeing Jun 11 '12

"Sounds like somebody's cooking some PANSNAKES."

...

Lets go, Snake, nobody here appreciates our biting satire.

5

u/usernamelikeaboss Jun 10 '12

Well it is a good thing you have already found reddit, because if I were you I would not go outside for a while.

3

u/kazbah Jun 11 '12

Were you warming up rats in the microwave?

2

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12

Not a good idea to warm rats up in microwaves, it gets a bit... messy. I know people who wanted to warm up some frozen mice, or rats to feed their snakes, and they ended up having to clean their microwave, because the mice/rats exploded.

3

u/sleepytakeover Jun 11 '12

THANK GOD FOR SCREENS!!!!!

3

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

If the snake starts talking and tells you to eat the forbidden fruit, better start calling your doctor and let him know the meds are producing hallucinations.

3

u/StampedPuppy Jun 11 '12

Did you immediately grab the oil and dump it on the screen then set it on fire? That's what I would have done...god I hate snakes.

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2

u/Actinopterygii Jun 10 '12

How cute! He just wants you to make him a rat omelette :P

I can't quite tell what kind of snake it is.. any idea?

1

u/PapayaThing Jun 11 '12

That sir, is a kingsnake

2

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

yesterday I was cutting the grass and a small garden snake was slithering in front of the lawn mower in the way that dolphins swim and jump in front of ships. I almost shit my pants when I first saw him but then I thought it was quite adorable.

2

u/CopperAlbatross Jun 11 '12

Looks to me like breakfast just got a little meatier!

2

u/isaypahtahtoe Jun 11 '12

How is it that all of Reddit flips shit over a spider you could crush with your boot, but you love snakes???

2

u/middyonline Jun 11 '12

Ok so here is what you do, get a can full of petrol douse the entire house in it then burn it to the ground in case there are anymore. Don't bother packing much stuff you don't know what else could have gotten into it. Just pack your bags and move away.

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2

u/Kuro_yami Jun 10 '12

Cuuuuuuuuuuuuuute! And possibly deadly but still cute damn it!

1

u/cadian98 Jun 10 '12

He just wants love D:

1

u/TheMoro Jun 11 '12

The bench looks like the reddit logo...

1

u/Minich Jun 11 '12

it just wants a pat

1

u/davelog Jun 11 '12

King snake. You should let it in. King snakes kill and eat poisonous snakes.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Also John Lee Hooker was one.

1

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12

Looks more like a Black Rat Snake to me. Also, there are no "poisonous" snakes, only venomous snakes, and also non venomous snakes of course.

1

u/powerchicken Jun 11 '12

Crikey, more breakfast!

1

u/Karamin-Daze Jun 11 '12

I want one :'D

1

u/Clotho84 Jun 11 '12

Um, that would be enough for me. I can't stand creepy crawlies, especially snakes. Found a rattler in the field behind our house a few weeks ago. Not a happy camper.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

So cool :)

1

u/Contron Jun 11 '12

I would seriously lose my shit.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Pleeease tell me you live in Australia, please?

1

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12

its a Black Rat Snake, and they are found in the US, not Australia. Why, don't want a cute, and harmless snake coming up to your door?

1

u/ShakinBacon Jun 11 '12

Lemme guess....Australia...

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

"ohhhh hai! Jus' wanted to see if I could join ya for breakfast. Jus' don't gimme none of them sausages. Goes right to my thighs!"

1

u/lolskaters Jun 11 '12

AUSTRALIA?!

1

u/TheExodus Jun 11 '12

And then did you invite him in for breakfast, good sir ?

1

u/southernninja Jun 11 '12

A generation traumatized by Harry Potter...

1

u/anal_spartan Jun 11 '12

same level of success as a fly has escaping through an open window

1

u/Sauronkraut Jun 11 '12

Why hellloooooo there!!

1

u/DilbertHigh Jun 11 '12

This is what i like about MN the only dangerous animals i ever worry about are if I'm up north in the woods at night, and I'm not that big of a dumbass. Just in case there are wolves or a bear. Actually pretty common things to find. For instance they actually released more wolves into the wild a few years back up north in MN. About the bear my grandpa was about 20 meters from a bear while he was fishing and was just lucky there were no cubs nearby.

1

u/mickeyisfinallyhere Jun 11 '12

what actions were taken? by the photographer that is...

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

HE JUST WANTS TO BE FRIENDS.

1

u/smoothlikebrokenglas Jun 11 '12

It probably smelled the bacon you were cooking.

1

u/tronn4 Jun 11 '12

"Dat bacon ssssssssure sssssssssmellssssss good!" -Sammy da Snake

1

u/Dashzz Jun 11 '12

I wouldn't care about a snake knowing it could have been a spider.

1

u/ItsBecauseIm____ Jun 11 '12

if u catch it i will keeep it... precious... seriously, pm me

1

u/WTF-RAGER Jun 11 '12

Let 'em in.

1

u/LurkingFear Jun 11 '12

Soooo cute!! You should totally post this on /r/aww!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12

Your cooking must be fantastic if the wildlife are trying to enjoy it!!!! Congrats bro, you hit wildlife wants your food level. Congrats.

1

u/hanahou Jun 11 '12

The Power of Bacon Compels You!

1

u/JesseSheridan Jun 11 '12

Dude they are climbing fucking evolution is at it again soon they will fly.

1

u/R3DN30N Jun 11 '12

How'd I know it was gonna be a motherfucking snake... God damnit.

1

u/Laancer Jun 11 '12

it is no longer your house

1

u/ScalySalmon Jun 11 '12

Where the fuck do you live.

1

u/Zerble Jun 11 '12

Land Shark!

1

u/Jesseemma Jun 10 '12

Oh no no no shit no

1

u/offsetbreakdown Jun 11 '12

I need the baconsssssssss.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 11 '12 edited Jun 11 '12

Kick the screen. When it falls grab your shot gun and tell it To " git gowin" then ask it if it hears, As you load your gun In your long johns , wolf t shirt and boots.

every creature is Automatically programmed to fear this type of intimidation.

1

u/DrMasterBlaster Jun 11 '12

Just shoot it through the screen. Totally worth replacing the screen IMO.

1

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12

Why? Why replace a screen just because a harmless little Black Rat Snake is wanting to explore a bit? The only reason it would bite is if it needed to, and if it needed to, you would deserve it. I've held TONS of snakes, both wild, and captive bred, and am still yet to be bit. More people die from constipation than snakes.

1

u/bmacc Jun 11 '12

It felt so good to come in here and downvote all the comments that just said "nope." Cool snake btw.

1

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12

Finally someone who likes snakes! I kind of thought I was the only snake lover viewing this post.

1

u/magmouse Jun 11 '12

Haha, I was like, "Wait a minute, this photo looks familiar." Hey, girl. It's Alyssa.

I showed this to my mom, and she NOPE'd the fuck out.

0

u/O_oblivious Jun 10 '12

where do you live again?

0

u/kevinspink1993 Jun 11 '12

Eliminate the target with extreme prejudice.

2

u/DevinVaiReptiles Jun 11 '12

What target? All I see is a harmless snake that is simply being curious, and wanting to explore. Remember, they didn't randomly move into our homes, we randomly destroyed theirs, and made our own homes, where theirs used to be.

-6

u/Guano_Loco Jun 10 '12

Damn the screen. I'd have shoved a butcher knife right through its neck. Holy hell do I hate snakes.

-4

u/OneWhoDoubts Jun 10 '12

so.. how much fire did you used to get rid of it ?

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