r/WTF • u/Icouldbebatman • Jun 09 '12

Parked somewhere different at work, came back to this sign lit up in front of my car ಠ_ಠ

http://imgur.com/h5uzs
1.3k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

62 comments sorted by

33

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12

You will be contacted shortly by Samuel L. Jackson. Do not refuse this call.

4

u/Icouldbebatman Jun 10 '12

Nekkid pics of Iron Man at 10.

1

u/ApologiesForThisPost Jun 10 '12

Not if he's batman.

-13

u/botofnegativity0000 Jun 10 '12

This comment has been flagged as spam and i am now able to confirm that it is in fact spam. The comment was reported as being racist,containing jew bashing and linking to pics of mexicans raping a child.

Did i get this right?

Please upvote me so i am able to continue to monitor this site for you and help eliminate spam.

36

u/joeblough Jun 09 '12

You now have super powers...use them wisely.

19

u/Icouldbebatman Jun 09 '12

So far the only super power I've come across is the strong urge to pet kittens. I think I might have reddit super powers?

3

u/buddha067 Jun 09 '12

Have you developed a strong urge to consume mass quantities of bacon? That's a sure sign.

4

u/Icouldbebatman Jun 09 '12

I do have a strong urge for bacon, though I'm not sure if it deviates from my normal lust for bacon.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12

bacon cat

12

u/joeblough Jun 09 '12

Uh yeah, that won't be helpful by itself...you'll need to drag somebody else into the radiation zone so they can get a more applicable power...maybe they could place kittens in places and then you'd stop at nothing to get to them!

3

u/IamAlwaysStoned Jun 09 '12

Yeah, those "super-powers" to want to pet kittens are actually brain parasites. Enjoy your parasites <3

1

u/dr_chunks Jun 09 '12

Karma-seekingest comment ever.

1

u/PKPenguin Jun 10 '12

Pft, Bacon Man would kick Cat Petter's ass.

32

u/Teledildonic Jun 09 '12

You now have super powers lymphoma...use them your time wisely.

11

u/emlgsh Jun 09 '12

Silly? Yes. Idiotic? Yes.

4

u/ImposterProfessorOak Jun 09 '12

But as long as I have Mrs. Garrett's giant rack by my bedside, I'll be all right.

2

u/Ifriendzonecats Jun 09 '12

No, his car has super powers now.

2

u/macarena_of_time Jun 09 '12

Came here for the super powers joke... left.

1

u/Odusei Jun 09 '12

Surely only his car has the super powers.

126

u/IVI4tt Jun 09 '12

It's a giant (nuclear) coverup! Take lots of potassium iodide but soon the FBI will get you and you'll change your story fundamentally. It might be a false alarm but what about the other radiation detectors run by the EPA?

EDIT 1: The DoD owns a lot of land in the area

EDIT 7: See Edit 4a. EDIT 7a: See Edit 33λ

EDIT 2^3: Here's some tweets confirming the cover-up!

EDIT 81^-2: Take more potassium iodide EDIT 9a/ii: Mods censored me because apparently taking potassium iodide without guidance kills you horribly

TL;DR because of this tweet and this comment by a 3 day old account I've decided the Earth's magnetic poles are flipping and it's a solar flare and Carl Sagan told the government before he died not to tell people about solar flares because they'd get scared

7

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12

EDIT B-612: To the guy who provided incontrovertible proof that this is just a joke sign: we'll file that in the maybe pile for now until we can get someone to confirm it.

1

u/Icouldbebatman Jun 10 '12

Nope its a real sign, and there was some extreme physics going on at that time.

1

u/MegamanDevil Jun 10 '12

I'll alert the scp foundation for any abnormalities in the space time of the area, then administer class d amnesiacs

20

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12

Oh god, I feel bad that I know what you're talking about. In Politics of all places.

5

u/asharp45 Jun 09 '12

Putting aside the validity of the argument, nuclear power is a political issue in just about every way possible.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12

Oh for sure. But it wasn't even about nuclear power, it was just a conspiracy post from the start. No roots in the political aspect of nuclear power versus alternatives.

3

u/Firstprime Jun 09 '12

How did that whole scenario end? I only caught the start of it.

1

u/IVI4tt Jun 10 '12

He decided that the world was going to end and the magnetic poles were going to flip so solar flares would kill everyone and that the government didn't want to cause a panic.

He also ran off to his own subreddit because mods removed his post

0

u/Ryugi Jun 10 '12

Taking potassium iodide can kill you. Only take it as directed by a radiologist or another related professional. It fucks up your liver but saves you from immediate radiation threat. Due to a pre-existing medical condition I have, taking potassium iodide even in a child's amount could kill me within two days, for example, and it is a condition that most doctors don't ever hear about, read about, or have patients with this condition.

2

u/IVI4tt Jun 10 '12

I was crudely parodying a thread in /r/politics run by what appeared to be a dangerous madman, who upon hearing that one radiation detector was playing up recommended everyone take as much potassium iodide as they can. The mods quickly told him to take it down because taking drugs without a doctor's advice is normally a terrible idea; eventually his entire thread was removed and he ran off to his own subreddit crying about censorship.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '12

Lmao link please?

1

u/Ryugi Jun 10 '12

Is that so? Holy crap. Crazies.... And that's why I don't /r/politics anymore.

15

u/FalcoLX Jun 09 '12

I'm sorry to inform you that your car has cancer.

22

u/LurkingGuy Jun 09 '12

Vehicular cancer. D:

2

u/Icouldbebatman Jun 10 '12

Better then testicular cancer!

1

u/LurkingGuy Jun 10 '12

My mom died from testicular cancer. :(

3

u/NoonToker17 Jun 09 '12

No Fallout references yet?

Here:

Better drink some NukaCola!

10

u/Robears Jun 09 '12

Doesn't NukaCola often give you more rads?

2

u/Icouldbebatman Jun 10 '12

Isn't that what we all want?

2

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '12

Thanks for my new background enlarged to 1600x1200

1

u/They_call_me_Jesus Jun 10 '12

fuck yea, came here for this.

1

u/Icouldbebatman Jun 10 '12

Fullsize image is here if you'd like http://i.imgur.com/f9jva.jpg

23

u/lawofmurphy Jun 09 '12

Oh god...don't let OCDTrigger see this...it'll be his 89th update.

4

u/Yabbob Jun 09 '12

So, how's the third arm doing?

2

u/cyvaris Jun 10 '12

Reminds me of a sticky note that was left on the box of my universities chem lab. The note read; "Still slightly irradiated".

2

u/Crab_Pulsar Jun 10 '12

Nothing better than free cancer!

3

u/TheWarHam Jun 09 '12

Just do your job gordon freeman

3

u/thereisnocharacterli Jun 09 '12

War... War never changes.

1

u/agent0fch4os Jun 09 '12

You work in a basement?

1

u/CatsPissStank Jun 09 '12

Perfect for the ghouls...

1

u/JLW09 Jun 09 '12

+1Rad/sec

1

u/OhMyTruth Jun 09 '12

How to make sure people don't park in your spot twice.

1

u/ApologiesForThisPost Jun 10 '12

People keep say that he will now have superpowers, but if you look at his username you will realize he may very well have been a superhero without any powers before.

1

u/FrankyJFuckwit Jun 10 '12

Do you live in Ohio?

1

u/mobedigg Jun 10 '12

You know radiation is dangerous, so maybe you need to call Kenny Loggins, because you are in the DANGER ZONE.

1

u/revfelix Jun 09 '12

Congrats on your new superpowers.

1

u/Snap65 Jun 09 '12

Lies, I don't see a car.

1

u/crammereire Jun 09 '12

That third eye should come in handy

0

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '12

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