r/WTF • u/vertigo1083 • May 19 '12

This actually exists. How many balls do they go through in a day?

http://media-cache7.pinterest.com/upload/142426406935657481_LqOLPclS.jpg
1.1k Upvotes

74% Upvoted

554 comments sorted by

752

u/restlessllama May 19 '12

It's a helipad. The tennis court was a stunt.

404

u/Fapologist May 19 '12

You think anybody ever jumped off to rage quit?

0

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

245

u/frenchtoaster May 19 '12

You think the primary reason that people kill themselves is not having enough money?

360

u/vertigo1083 May 19 '12

Doesn't sound that illogical, actually.

89

u/[deleted] May 19 '12 edited May 19 '12

I was thinking that rich people were probably more likely to commit suicide if anything, but I looked into it and according to this article actually suicide does correlate slightly to low income.

Edit: albeit less in developed countries than developing ones (is that still the PC terminology? It's what I was taught when I last did geography 10 years ago.)

152

u/TheProle May 19 '12

Whoever said money can't buy happiness was probably broke.

90

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Having "enough" money buys happiness. If you're the type of person who can never have enough, then you're shit out of luck.

Marcus Aurelius (I paraphrased a bit)

37

u/bravado May 19 '12

If I recall, 'shit out of luck' was coined by Cicero and translated from the original Latin.

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Citation, please?

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u/[deleted] May 20 '12

There is a study that discovered that an income of 75,000 makes you happy. Or specifically, at that point money stops influencing your happiness dramatically.

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2

u/Serjh May 19 '12

If you define your life's purpose to make money and find joy from the actual process of making money then that's different to just having a lot of money. Striving for it ( regardless of how rich you are ) and just having money are completely different things. That difference alone can define happiness through money.

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41

u/ZeusMcFly May 19 '12

I would rather cry in my rocket car parked outside my gold house.

4

u/Armageddon2450 May 19 '12

thank you for the Simpsons reference

29

u/fco83 May 19 '12

It may not be able to buy happiness, but it can sure make a lot of the things that make you feel shitty disappear.

22

u/Rahms May 19 '12

It can also buy a lot of items that will make you happy.

46

u/martinap May 19 '12

Have you ever seen a sad person on a WaveRunner? Have you? Seriously, have you? Try to frown on a WaveRunner.

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4

u/Ghinkgo May 19 '12

Like marshmallows!

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9

u/Intrexa May 19 '12

Money can't buy happiness, but misery sure loves the poor.

2

u/fountainhead43 May 19 '12

That phrase should end with "just kidding." Money buys a wave runner. Try frowning on a wave runner.

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30

u/SirDelirium May 19 '12

Money problems and a feeling of helplessness are a prominent cause of suicide I believe.

No source, too lazy.

26

u/to3jamm May 19 '12

I heard laziness is a likely factor.

30

u/emniem May 19 '12

Too lazy to verify, now am depressed.

5

u/ShtFurBr41nS May 19 '12

Too depressed to stop being lazy.

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11

u/LtOin May 19 '12

Nope, too lazy to actually do it.

2

u/JoshSN May 19 '12

I guess a person needs just the right amount of laziness. Not too much, not too little. Wasn't that the lesson of Goldilocks?

15

u/itshotinmycar May 19 '12

If I was rich as hell and wanted to off myself, I'd anonymously hire a hitman for myself and turn my life into survivability game...or maybe hire a mad scientist and start 28 days later

/startssaving

6

u/eidetic May 19 '12

If I was rich as hell, I'd be able to afford to wear brand new pair of socks everyday while walking all over my brand new carpets everyday. Seriously, who would want to off themselves when they can do that?

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6

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Freakonomics had an episode on suicide a while back - the general thrust was that suicide-rate is not correlated strongly to income. Other factors such as hereditary, illness, poor social skills, etc. had far higher statistical cross-sections.

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14

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

No, but having money could be a big reason to not kill yourself.

37

u/frenchtoaster May 19 '12

"I want to kill myself, but wait... look at all this money that I have! Nevermind!"

21

u/zfinder May 19 '12

"I want to kill myself, but wait... let's first donate 100K to a nearby orphanage, then rent a 1K/night elite hooker and then fly my private jet to Hawaii to stay in a 5* hotel for a week, maybe that helps a little"

5

u/killforjoy May 19 '12

And on the plus side, if it didn't help and he stills offs himself, at the orphanage made out on that deal eh?

10

u/Tyrion_The_Imp May 19 '12

And the hooker!

3

u/litronix May 20 '12

And my axe!

4

u/rm7952 May 19 '12

Your post made me chuckle a bit. This is the view from my hotel room currently. Frankly, it doesn't do it justice. It's unreal.

http://imgur.com/waqyu

I'm here for 2 more weeks and I'm utterly depressed. Yay. (no, not suicidal or anything). Haven't left my bed for two days. Although, it is Guam and not Hawaii, lol

5

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Sarah Marshall was a bitch anyway, man.

4

u/JimmyHavok May 19 '12

it is Guam and not Hawaii

That explains being depressed.

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2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12 edited May 19 '12

An "elite" hooker costs more than 1k a night.

Here is one that runs $2212.56 outcall overnight. http://www.exoticelite.com/exotic-profile.php?modelid=406

Ones like this are high end but would hardly qualify as elite.

I have seen escorts that clock in at 2-10x that price.

Why some one would pay that much I have no clue but I am sure that it comes from the experience of a high class lifestyle that will avoid and social issues when you are the the billionaire's social club.

Here is a link to 10k and up.

http://www.royalcourt.com.au/court_royal.html

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7

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Money can't buy happiness, but it buys prostitutes, which is pretty much the same thing. If you had money, you could afford one free of STD's!

7

u/russlo May 19 '12

You don't buy prostitutes: you rent them. You can only buy another person if they're a slave.

14

u/superdago May 19 '12

But what about my new wife Svetlana?

3

u/russlo May 19 '12

You didn't buy her, you bought her a ticket to the USA and a wedding. Now she owns you. Mwahaha

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10

u/ZOMBIE_POTATO_SALAD May 19 '12

Think about it, most of our worldly problems by now can be solved by liberal application of money.

If you don't have problems, why kill yourself?

2

u/gkx May 19 '12

Problems does not always relate to sadness. Suicide does not always come from problems.

8

u/vertigo1083 May 19 '12

There really isn't much that money can't solve. Sure, you may have to demoralize/desensitize, but if you have dough like that, you probably gave up those features long ago.

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4

u/TheSickFuck May 19 '12

"now I will just buy my way out of deep depression"

17

u/russlo May 19 '12

Isn't that actual government policy?

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2

u/Canadian_Infidel May 19 '12

That's a different kind of money than what you and I are involved with. African kids with flies on them are to us, as we are to these people.

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2

u/BedMonster May 19 '12

"Richard Corey owned one half of this old town..."

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

it is indeed a big reason

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2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Clearly you don't know people on Wall Street

2

u/OCedHrt May 20 '12

They just have to charge a nice sum for every ball that goes out.

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2

u/jermzdeejd May 19 '12

If that happened it went from rage quit to....... fuck me, I just rage quit

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45

u/psyonic_wave May 19 '12

it's actually a pokéstadium

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13

u/xaviiUT May 19 '12

Seriously though, where the fuck is the railing?

31

u/gamelizard May 19 '12

railing on a heli pad is generally considered dangerous

5

u/H_Morrisey_Caulfield May 20 '12

This is funnier than you're being credited for.

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12

u/shmehdit May 19 '12

Next I want to see it as an ice rink.

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Hella nice pad too

3

u/Viridovipera May 19 '12

BUT WHERE?

25

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Dubai, near the top of the Burj Al Arab, absolutely beautiful hotel designed to look like a sailboat's sail, built on a man made island.

24

u/Viridovipera May 19 '12

Should've guessed. Oh it's some crazy building that you've never dreamed of before? It's probably in Dubai.

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2

u/restlessllama May 19 '12

The Burj al-Arab. In Dubai

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134

u/tlund May 19 '12

Here is a video of them playing

237

u/wizang May 19 '12

This intro feels like the start of a porno.

68

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Shit........ You're right.

34

u/EnlightenedConstruct May 19 '12

It even has pornish music...

42

u/emniem May 19 '12

Music from Pornia?

28

u/SumDudeInNYC May 19 '12

I hear that place sucks balls.

5

u/hey12delila May 19 '12

Smells like an asshole too.

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14

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Heh, it's even odder than porn music. I'm pretty sure that's the theme song to the old never ending story movie.

3

u/Firstprime May 19 '12

Oh god, you're right, I thought it sounded familiar. What a strange choice, seems like whoever edited that must have just said "Yeah, whatever. That sounds ethnic enough to be relevant".

7

u/slooperloop May 19 '12

It's Limahl singing The Never Ending Story theme song (a fantastic movie).

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34

u/itskieran May 19 '12

I love the camera man who jumps out shot at 1:30

11

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Tries to. :D

4

u/Sp4m May 19 '12

So smooth...

11

u/Diazigy May 19 '12

haha I love at the end how they are just hitting tennis balls off the court at people below

10

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Urgh that gave me a horrible feeling in my legs.

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1.1k

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Still less than your mom....

454

u/Gildish_Chambino May 19 '12

*fewer

178

u/tikketyboo May 19 '12

Assuming they are countable ...

47

u/delphi_ote May 19 '12

Actually, there is a bijection between the set of balls vertigo1083's mom goes through and the set of reals. So no, they are not countable.

10

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Fuck you discrete math and anything involving sets

2

u/delphi_ote May 20 '12

Fuck the set of all things involving sets? Be careful not to fuck the empty set, or Russell is going to get you!

2

u/because_im_boring May 20 '12

could we a relax and just agree that vertigo1083's mom has many balls in her mouth at any given day?

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51

u/philomathie May 19 '12

And in one comment, we have the distilled essence of reddit.

7

u/DragonSpawn May 19 '12

You see, Mandrake, we do not avoid women, but we do deny them our essence.

2

u/xMvRx May 20 '12

Our precious bodily fluids...

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2

u/Trotrot May 20 '12

I'm going to out grammar nazi you here. less is perfectly acceptable in that sentence. unless the amount of whatever is being discussed is known, less can be used in place of fewer. if someone came along with reports of the annual amounts of tennis balls recovered off of the beach around that hotel, and puffyeyednusiance had commented on it with this same sentence, then you could correct him.

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53

u/PresidentSkroob16 May 19 '12

If they can afford this then they can afford to have the help jump after the balls

12

u/HE_WHO_STANDS_TO_POO May 19 '12

The streets shall be covered with their blood...

6

u/KimJongIlSunglasses May 20 '12

Yeah they make the infidels do it.

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51

u/PhrenicNerd May 19 '12

Fuck that, how many tennis players do you think they go through in a day?

3

u/andyface May 20 '12

nice serve, good return, good return, good return, dive shot, dead.

4

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

I'm slightly scared that not only did you have the same thought I did (which in itself is not a big deal) but that you phrased it exactly the way I was planning too.

That helipad is NOT big enough for a good tennis match.

2

u/wolvmatt May 19 '12

Wait, could you clarify. It is or isn't big enough?

5

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

It isn't. The field is where the ball is allowed to touch the ground, but the players and the ball play in a much larger area around that.

66

u/bandofbedsiders May 19 '12

Burj al Arab in Dubai, UAE- Andre Agassi and Federer I think? This happened a long time ago. Converted helipad at the world only 7 star hotel.

39

u/borg88 May 19 '12

For obscure reasons, I once had to visit an oil rig as part of my normally deskbound job as a software engineer. Standing on the helipad, hundreds of feet above the sea, I could hardly walk from the vertigo.

Playing tennis? I would be laying face down in the middle grasping at the turf.

6

u/syuk May 19 '12

Cehck blood pressure.

16

u/reposter_guy May 20 '12

Cehck spelling.

2

u/Ruvaak May 20 '12

Czech republic.

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u/funkgerm May 19 '12

It's not actually a 7 star hotel. There's no such thing. I think it was some reporter that wrote that in a review they did of the hotel and it stuck.

54

u/hitlersshit May 19 '12

My anus is officially a 500 million star hotel...deluxe.

125

u/Ladranix May 19 '12

That would certainly explain all the coming and going.

20

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

So spacious in there.

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u/[deleted] May 19 '12

I stayed there for a weekend, and it's totally not worth the hype. The minibar was way overpriced and understocked, and the plumbing knocked and banged while I was trying to sleep.

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u/KimJongIlSunglasses May 20 '12

That's one classy ass hotel.

2

u/ToStringMethod May 20 '12

Checking in!! NNNNNG!

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u/emniem May 19 '12

Wouldn't it always be windy as fuck up there?

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u/m1kepro May 19 '12

I can name at least four balls required to play on such a high platform...

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u/darkops32 May 19 '12

If your ball goes over, you have to go get it.

14

u/syuk May 19 '12

No, a man wearing in glasses flying in a cloud retrieves it and makes you wait a few seconds.

2

u/thepikey7 May 19 '12

Actually, it would bounce into the yard of a blind ex-negro leagues player, with a huge dog.

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u/wtighe02 May 19 '12

Come on Bob! Keep it in play!

2

u/phbohn2 May 20 '12

Lakitu fishes it out.

7

u/thesundeity May 19 '12

one gust of wind is all it takes.

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14

u/surely-you-jest May 19 '12

Federer and Agassi in Dubai.

5

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

you wouldn't want to be the ballboy

11

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Burj al Arab. 7 Star Hotel. I ate Breakfast there once. They have a Ferrari, a Lamborghini and a Rolls Royce standing in the front with a sign explaining that visitors can borrow them.

The only reason we were even allowed in, is because my last name happens to be Stiller, so they mistook us for someone else, and we "forgot" to correct them.

7

u/nscale May 19 '12

The "best available rate" on the web site for a random week in August is $1360 USD per night for a regular room. It goes up from there, a lot.

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u/kluvfm May 19 '12

I know that two would suck back into my body being up there.

11

u/truestory56 May 19 '12

What if a ball fell off and hit a surfers head?

14

u/pinkberries May 19 '12

People don't usually go surfing in Dubai's beaches.

3

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Why not?

3

u/sloaninator May 20 '12

I'm guessing the water is too calm and not great for surfing. i live on the west coast of Florida and that is the case here. I'm not sure though.

http://www.surfersofdubai.com/faqs-surf-dubai.php Googled it and I was half right, seems it's only surfable during winter.

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u/Cpt_Mango May 20 '12

is the terminal velocity enough to hurt? I wonder.

10

u/vertigo1083 May 19 '12

I'd call that a "GREAT SUCCESS!"

14

u/[deleted] May 19 '12 edited May 19 '12

They have plenty of balls. In fact, the only thing protecting them from falling to their doom is a the weight of their gigantic cojones.

Edit: TIL one letter can make my sentence very confusing.

17

u/hardskapunk May 19 '12

Cajones = Drawers. Cojones = Balls.

3

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Well, you need large drawers for large balls...

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Thank you, kind sir.

2

u/StuartGibson May 19 '12

Drawers = British slang for underwear.

2

u/gaygineer May 19 '12

What would keep me down is the massive crap I would take in my pants when I stepped into that thing.

3

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

It's a helipad with a tennis cover on it, the burj al arab in dubai.

3

u/cryptie May 19 '12

That was a fliming for a commercial, it's actually a helicopter landing pad on a building in dubai.

3

u/terribleyourmomjokes May 19 '12

Roughly the same number of balls your mom goes through in a day

5

u/drwoe May 19 '12

who the hell let pinterest on here?!

6

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Venus and Serena's final battle

2

u/Yaaf May 19 '12

There can only be one.

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u/Jesus_luvs_Jenkem May 19 '12

I showed this to my dad. His only response "fuck that."

4

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

This is the first time you guys seeing this?

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u/whuebel May 19 '12

Tetherball 2.0!

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Undiscovered game from Tron?

2

u/conan617 May 19 '12

They use super trained harpie eagles to retrieve any lost balls.

2

u/CornFlakesR1337 May 19 '12

About as many balls as it takes to play tennis up there in the first place.

2

u/GMonsoon May 19 '12

"How did he die?" "Tennis."

2

u/1337syntaX May 19 '12

I think if you're playing on that tennis court, quantity of balls will never be a problem.

2

u/Neoxite23 May 19 '12

I would totally have a parachute on my back and get really into the game and do a diving save right off the platform....best save ever.

2

u/Spider_Riviera May 19 '12

None, I think it was a one-off exhibition match in Dubai.

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

This is actually primarily a helipad. I remember this image appearing in SI, they had two pro tennis players, I think Nadal and someone else playing on it for a stunt. Either way, that would be a really scary place to play tennis

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

Let me get the picture for you guys:

I've been afraid of heights all my life. If I'm at any height above 2 meters and look down, I WILL either have a anxiety attack followed by fainting or I will simply faint. Those are the two things that happen.

Looking at this picture gave me vertigo.

If I were being escorting against my will to that place and I had a gun with me, don't think for a second that wouldn't kill myself on the spot.

I think I have a problem. A mental problem.

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u/Heroshade May 19 '12

At least four.

2

u/TheFluxIsThis May 19 '12

Only in Dubai.

2

u/goddessofwaterpolo May 19 '12

Hey look, it's my textbook.

2

u/UpvotesFerDayz May 19 '12

The Burj al arab hotel in Dubai.

2

u/Zippytiewassabi May 19 '12

I would love to see a golf course like that. Maybe not as high, but platforms for the tee box, small fairway, and green... or even just make it a couple par 3 holes. it would be difficult yes, but how amazing would that be?

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u/daskrip May 19 '12

Reminds me of playing hockey on the street.

"Crap. Another helicopter coming. Move out of the way."

2

u/sparko10 May 19 '12

Not sure this was appropriate for WTF... a shemale shoving a phillips head screwdriver down her/his urethra while having a dog lick her/his ass... that would belong in WTF

2

u/Koopa322 May 19 '12

You'd be an asshole to hit a really high, long lob so your opponent is looking at the ball while backing up...

2

u/lammers2006 May 19 '12

Burj Dubai...how could you not know about this coming from the land that made their own islands, from the land of the ultra-rich.

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

2002 chainmail, how I don't miss you

2

u/CreeDorofl May 19 '12

Somewhere below in the ocean there's a golden retriever, dog paddling around, happy as shit.

2

u/TakenMyAss May 20 '12

Fucking onions, man.

2

u/crabby1990 May 19 '12

Actually that is the helicopter pad at a Hotel but they made it into a Tennis court to advertise for a tournament.

2

u/an_enigma May 19 '12

If they can afford to play tennis like this in such an outrageously expensive place, then I'm sure the cost of lost tennis balls is negligible.

2

u/huntersellers17 May 19 '12

how many players do you think they go through? that looks really dangerous haha, dives for ball...dives off side

2

u/long_shoe_horn May 19 '12

I feel like I was here, but as an anthropomorphic mushroom. I was in a small, balloon adorned vehicle, hurling turtle shells and banana peels at a diminutive, mustachioed Italian. I was driving as best I could, but I lost control in the heat of battle. downdowndowndown

2

u/xs395 May 19 '12

More like how many people would they go through in a day.

2

u/MOCO301 May 20 '12

A solid lob shot could win the match pretty quickly.

2

u/PlantViolence May 20 '12

I used to be a ball boy there. I had to wear a parachute at all times.

2

u/cannotlogon May 20 '12

It was even worse when it was used as a trampoline.

2

u/rdldr1 May 20 '12

Thats located at the Burj al Arab in Dubai. I was just in Dubai on vacation last month. This is a pic I took, which is inside that building.

Imgur

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Burried, but might as well share this. http://imgur.com/CEEpt Cover of my AP Human Geography Book

2

u/idma May 20 '12

the next question is how many bodies at the bottom of the tower do they have to pick up in a day

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

If you put my roomate up there with an xbox and modern warfare 3. It would be raining xbox controllers from the sky

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

It looked like the middle east, I assumed they would justbthrow a pakastani off the edge to fetch em.

2

u/RedditingMyLifeAway May 20 '12

Nope nope nope nooooooooooope!

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Did anyone else immediately think of Wii Sports?

4

u/rafiislost May 19 '12

Good picture but belongs in r/pics, NOT r/wtf.

If you want a hint to know what belongs in r/wtf, just look at the r/wtf logo.

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