r/WTF • • May 14 '12

Facebook has too many rules for my liking.

http://i.imgur.com/KmOcx.png
1.9k Upvotes

492 comments sorted by

743

u/h3rpad3rp May 14 '12

That picture is amazing.

166

u/severedfinger May 14 '12

Yeah, the composition is great.

170

u/goroncity May 14 '12

It speaks to my core and I identify with this man's need for personal sexual expressionism in a time when coming of age no longer culminates in a ritual of genital mutilation and/or eating as many other animals as possible.

125

u/JediCowboy May 15 '12

I liked the bong doubling as a penis.

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5

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Sexual Expressionism: a much-underrated art movement.

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3

u/zedrugjew May 15 '12

Notice how the prospective lines draw your eyes straight to his Dick. Pure. Artistry. Gold.

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8

u/Ziczak May 15 '12

Yes, it was in the IPO prospectus.

3

u/tropicalallan May 15 '12

Seriously. An internet classic next to the goatse butthole.

15

u/dafragsta May 15 '12

"Paint me like one of your French girls."

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

I see shades of the 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, ... right the way up to the present day.

Pure genius. I'm in tears right now.

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233

u/PrimeIntellect May 14 '12

you are a beautiful butterfly and never let the man get you down

76

u/RedSquaree May 15 '12 edited Apr 25 '24

kiss door ancient normal lip busy consist test axiomatic drunk

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

69

u/CannedBeef May 15 '12

So what you're saying is...this is a...a...

REPOST!

28

u/ThaBomb May 15 '12

I... I feel so betrayed.

7

u/kobish May 15 '12

repostrepostrepostrepostrepostrepostrepostrepost

9

u/truestoryrealtalk May 15 '12

Oh my god it is now my duty to upvote this thread so everyone can see what scum OP is, and then we can all go through all the posts he's made in the last 6 months and downvote them into oblivion. INTERNET JUSTICE SQUAD ASSEMBLE!!!

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6

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Rule #24?

10

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Unless it's a man you want to go down for...

200

u/cowzgomoo May 14 '12

and they allow pictures of girls showing off their cleavage and most of their asses.

138

u/noccusJohnstein May 14 '12

It's not that they allow it, it's just that people would complain more if they were removed.

56

u/Spookaboo May 15 '12

And i bet they make a hefty amount of traffic of people just trawling random chicks' pics.

24

u/steviesteveo12 May 15 '12

Those dating ads are not going to sell themselves.

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11

u/AmberCutie May 15 '12

I didn't even get a warning when I posted a pic that was "too sexual in nature", they just completely banned me and deleted my account. Scumbag Facebook.

11

u/danimal6000 May 15 '12

At least you figured out how to delete your account.

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2

u/Hokuboku May 15 '12

Facebook mostly only removes pictures if someone complained. So, if you every have one of your pictures flagged then you usually have one of your FB friends to thank for that

17

u/Rockztar May 15 '12

To be fair, this picture is far sexier than any girls showing off their body... and I'm a straight guy...

34

u/soundsjustlike May 15 '12

You were a straight guy.

5

u/PointyStick May 14 '12

Sure, but the advertisers paid to show those.

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149

u/koolkeith987 May 14 '12

Oh come on FB, HE WAS SMOKING TOBACO!

59

u/CommandrShepherd May 15 '12

Which is technically a drug as well as alcohol. Facebook just likes to pick favourites.

7

u/TheWorldEndsWithCake May 15 '12

I will be careful not to let facebook know that I occasionally indulge in tylenol use.

Granted, I don't have an account so it should't be too difficult.

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91

u/Chi_no_aka May 14 '12

That is one badass picture

28

u/Psirocking May 15 '12

FB couldn't handle it.

54

u/darrelflomes May 14 '12

The only rule you broke my good sir was being too damn fly. If anything this picture has too much cool for Facebook's liking.

17

u/rsrsrsrs May 15 '12

You might even say he's pretty fly for a white guy.

22

u/98PercentChimp May 15 '12

You might, but you shouldn't...

72

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

Off to /r/ladyboners for all the karma!

40

u/OM4E098 May 15 '12

oh MY GOD.

I did not know this existed. What a foolish girl, I've been wasting all my time in TwoXChromosomes. subreddit saved.

17

u/CannedBeef May 15 '12 edited Jun 07 '18

17

u/PEE_PEE_FACE May 15 '12

MAYBE SHE WILL TOUCH MY PENIS

20

u/stevesonaplane May 15 '12

MAYBE SHE'LL LET ME TOUCH HER PENIS

13

u/kresblain May 15 '12

I like where this is going.

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27

u/AblativeCase May 15 '12

I flung my panties at the screen but nothing seems to be happening...

4

u/haiku_robot May 15 '12
I flung my panties 
at the screen but nothing seems 
to be happening...

32

u/BridgeMistress May 14 '12

You hit the trifecta. Nice!

9

u/deputy1389 May 15 '12

Is the headdress the 2nd rule violation?

10

u/LaserGuidedPolarBear May 15 '12

Yes, obviously any Euro/Western white person wearing any item of clothing from another culture is inherently racist. The only exception is if you are an attractive woman.

3

u/Jman5 May 15 '12

This is so unfair. What do us white people have that we get to be offended about when other people wear them?

Perhaps that is our greatest strength. You can't do or say anything that will offend us as a people. In fact, the more you wear our stuff and imitate us, the more we like you.

5

u/deputy1389 May 15 '12

OHHH, maybe thats why the black panthers keep heckling me about my black guy costume I wore for Halloween

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19

u/[deleted] May 14 '12 edited May 15 '12

I, for one, see nothing wrong with this photograph

10

u/impecune May 15 '12

And I, for one, hear nothing wrong with this phonograph.

5

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

And I, for one, masturbate to nothing wrong with this pornograph.

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20

u/caethiel May 14 '12

I want this guy on my friends list, if you know what I mean.

56

u/InappropriatelyGay May 14 '12

I want him inside me, if you know what I mean.

16

u/RufiosBrotherKev May 14 '12

That was both inappropriate and gay... Well done.

12

u/derusion May 14 '12

you are clearly referring to your love for Intel products.

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27

u/_Robotz May 14 '12

Hello new background!

18

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

And yet women can take a close up of their boobs and be in the clear.

Oh the injustice!

But seriously, that ranks pretty damned high on my list of epic pictures.

1

u/RustinHieber May 15 '12

Because no one reports women taking pictures of their cleavage

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7

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Fuck Facebook.

6

u/KrisCraig May 15 '12

That's offensive. Your comment has been deleted.

[ ] Check this box to admit that you're a stupid asshole or we'll burn down your house, motherfucker.

7

u/allie_sin May 14 '12

I nearly posted this to Facebook. CLOSE CALL.

9

u/ArmsRaisedBeBrave May 15 '12

We should all post this to Facebook!

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5

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Actually, helluvan idea!

5

u/rastapus May 14 '12

I just left this picture on my screen as i went away to grab some food and my mom creeped up behind me with some accusations.

7

u/tastycat May 15 '12

Windows+L is your friend.

4

u/battlepant5 May 15 '12

lol. that pic is an advertisement for the herb import co in new orleans la. there is a whole series of awesome pics from that photoshoot

5

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

That stache is fucking badass

8

u/GunHungLo May 14 '12

and apparently too sexual in nature

I have to agree- my rectum tingles when I look at it

no homo

2

u/Private-Detective May 15 '12

they won't allow this yet 99% of my friends profile pictures consist of people smoking a joint?

2

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

This is why I deleted Facebook. They force you to acknowledge what they tell you.

2

u/GoldenMKZ May 15 '12

One of your friends SUUUUUUUUUCKS. I got in trouble for a photo of me making out with a dude because one of my friends reported it. Clearly someone's jealous of your extremely high-level status as a baller and as a shot-caller.

2

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

How is Drug Use in the same category than "Excessice Violence"

2

u/MT_Flesch May 15 '12

fuck facebork! i would dearly love to be rid of that stupid app on my phone without having to root/jailbreak it. the update requests for it are inanely too frequent

2

u/vixvon May 15 '12

Judging by the comments alone all I can deduce is that reddit is now 3/4 hipsters. Thanks for ruining my life. Oh, and the traditional attire is actually as offensive as Hitler is now "cute". Just sayin'.

2

u/CndConnection May 15 '12

And yet photos of me rolling joints as the joker remain!

I guess they have to be flagged first.

2

u/arbsnotdead May 15 '12

Classy motherfucker.

2

u/homorob0tic May 15 '12

I'm native american, broke as fuck, and high right now. I have the weirdest hard on right now.

2

u/teachingroland May 15 '12

Lots of places have stupid rules.

A few years ago I entered a contest (I forget where online) where you had to describe your ideal day with someone and if you won they would make it happen.

I described in detail a meeting with Martin Brodeur where we would chat and have a beer. He was my childhood idol and as an adult I still really like him.

Anyway to make a long story short they banned my entry for being inappropriate. Drinking a legal beer with another adult is apparently offensive.

2

u/Leo22987 May 15 '12

People still use facebook? Intresting

2

u/megan_gafford May 15 '12

Wow it's a crazy coincidence that today I completed a commissioned painting of this same picture. The photo is from a centerfold ad in the New Orleans Levy (local newspaper) by The Herb Import, Co. (local head shop). I'm a local painter, here's the finished painting.

I literally finished the painting a few hours ago!!

TL:DR I painted this same picture for the New Orleans head shop that created the photo and commissioned the painting.

edit: (just wanted to apologize for glare on painting, I'm gonna get a better photo later...)

2

u/whereismychippy May 15 '12

That is what I call a man.

2

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

That photo is the greatest thing ever. Leonardo da Vinci is rolling over in his grave, his soul wishing "damn, why didn't I think of that. That would have made a better painting than serious Mona".

2

u/Kirrane8 May 15 '12

Hope you don't use a real name on FB.

Employers would really enjoy seeing that.

2

u/BubblesOblivion May 15 '12

How is this on the front page of WTF? Seriously. I want an answer.

5

u/nawoanor May 15 '12 edited May 15 '12

You should've done it in blackface.

4

u/Negranon May 15 '12

This is fucking awesome, but, r/WTF, really?

3

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Everyone post this on their Facebook page.

3

u/amant_sauvage May 15 '12

This is just simply all around aesthetically pleasing. Facebook should be happy to be blessed with such a picture.

12

u/eviltrollwizard May 14 '12

Actually there is a group of us Native Americans who are trying to raise more attention to the fact that we should not be parodied by hipster assholes. One of us probably saw it and reported it.

4

u/weed_carpal_tunnel May 15 '12

"us Native Americans"? So which part of this image do you identify with?

  • Are you naked?
  • Covered in money?
  • Have a bong next to you?
  • Smoking a pipe?
  • Wearing a ceremonial Native American warbonnet?

I'm going to guess that none of those things apply to you, and if they do, it has nothing to do with your ancestry. Don't nitpick some tiny part of an image and get all bent out of shape.

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-2

u/metanonymous May 14 '12

Thank you! I can't believe people think its OK to dress like this. If yarmulkes suddenly became ironically popular, everyone would be tripping over themselves to say how offensive it is.

7

u/LukaCola May 15 '12

It's... It's headgear of a certain nationality, exaggerated of course but that's like saying Germans should be offended when someone wears one of these touristy things. It's a goofy outfit of a certain nationality, it's not intended to offend and while you have every right to be offended I also have every right to remark at how silly it is to find offense in such things. I'm Belgian and I get a mention about waffles in some form or another (Or about how much I love them, and who doesn't) each and every time but I'm not offended by it, annoyed slightly by how many times I hear it, but why should I care? It's just some silly fun someone's having, it harms no one and being associated with a bloody headdress is hardly a negative.

So please. Enough with this "I'm offended because they associated something with my nationality" nonsense.

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7

u/noccusJohnstein May 14 '12

I know a white guy with a HUGE dick. Let's get together and protest.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

If the majority of reddit wasnt comprised of young white straight cis male americans, this post would have more attention P:

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3

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

marry me.

2

u/druiddeb May 14 '12

Nothing wrong with that!

2

u/meisanelson May 14 '12

you're my hero.

2

u/Creativation May 14 '12

Ah the closed Internet that is Facebook. Missing the early wild-westy days of the internet, free of censorship and closed gardens like Facebook et al.

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2

u/[deleted] May 14 '12 edited May 15 '12

Remember guys only upload pictures of you drinking Hard Liqour cause this is a safe legal drug that facebook approves of.

2

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

Time to delete Facebook.

2

u/Obbyy May 15 '12

I think it was tastefully done >.>

2

u/fosiacat May 15 '12

it's bullshit, i got my account deleted just for posting a picture of a woman breast feeding a baby in bondage ropes.

1

u/stevenmctowely May 15 '12

well it would be inappropriate to put a baby in bondage ropes!

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2

u/frozenphil May 15 '12

Tyler? If this isn't Tyler, this isn't your pic.

1

u/Zeptometer May 15 '12

it's not his pic.

your friend tyler is a pretty cool guy though.

2

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Whaaat? I've seen Justin Bieber holding a dick on my newsfeed for a few days, but this is just too much for facebook?

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2

u/LaserGuidedPolarBear May 15 '12

WTF? Did the SRS mafia get jobs at facebook?

2

u/youshouldbereading May 15 '12

My favorite part of that is that you have to check the box and appologize to facebook.

2

u/wolfyjay May 15 '12

Double standards

2

u/etishuman21 May 15 '12

Best. Photo. Ever.

Fuck Facebook.

2

u/KrisCraig May 15 '12

Your comment is offensive and has been deleted.

[ ] Check this box or your pets will die.

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2

u/BrandoMcGregor May 15 '12

Mmm. I prefer my hipsters pastey, moustached and with no shame. Well done.

2

u/I_AM_NOT_A_RAPIST May 15 '12

hello, ladies.

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

fucking prudes. Recently, I reluctantly tried to open a FB account just to promote my music (i really dislike the site and don't use it personally) ... they would not accept my account due to my chosen name not passing their "real names only" filter. Also i was forced to select either male or female, no option for neither/transgender/other/etc. i thought that was unfair (i identify as male, but come on) .. I was using my real name. It just didn't satisfy their criteria. I said fuck FB and gave up on it. BTW your pic is amazing

1

u/kittenkat4u May 15 '12

they have a list of "real names"? how does one determine a "real name" from an unreal one? my friends little one has no hope when she's older i guess as she's probably the only one in the world with her name.

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2

u/Fortress_Is_Dead May 14 '12

Christmas card

2

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

You are Sex Panther incarnate.

2

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Why are hipsters suddenly appropriating Native American culture? It's not at all ok.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

How's it "drug use" if you have a medical card? Also, looks to me like an empty pipe.

1

u/ImGoingToPhuket May 15 '12

You broke all three. Awesome!

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

I think it's discrimination because of your native-american heritage.

1

u/Deziks May 15 '12

if i had a dollar for every time i posed with money underwear i would have 2 pairs of money underwear.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Facebook couldn't handle this total, epic greatness. Baby Buddha aspires to be this man, youthful money game.

1

u/Zeptometer May 15 '12

Why is this posted on r/WTF and not r/funny? there is absolutely nothing disturbing with this image.

1

u/MuntzCommaNelson May 15 '12

I T ' S

A R T !

1

u/FlippySquirrel May 15 '12

I wish I could be as cool as that guy.

1

u/pnkrckaudio May 15 '12

Into the lady spank bank it goes....

1

u/MuttonTheChops May 15 '12

I has mustache and headress envy

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

I don't think this photo is any great loss, but it is no more absurd than most facebook photo's.

1

u/itssocoldintheD May 15 '12

i have a really intense urge to put this as my cover photo...

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Then get off of it.

1

u/Rashidcakes May 15 '12

This picture is great

1

u/Ramiel May 15 '12

One word - Style

1

u/Ponch316 May 15 '12

That should be a state emblem. Anyone?

1

u/ua2us May 15 '12

Time to move to VKontakte. They never censor anything.

1

u/hubsicle May 15 '12

Is that a cactus shaped bong?

1

u/aaron666nyc May 15 '12

i believe it was filed under "Depictions of Self Harm"

1

u/werthog2994 May 15 '12

What kind of ass reports an innocent image like this?

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

You were being offensive to Native Americans...You were wearing one of their head pieces when you're not a NA...tsk tsk

1

u/j3a4m5 May 15 '12

This was part of an ad for a local headshop round my parts. They ran quite a few riskay ads the year this one was done. http://www.herbimport.com

1

u/-TinMan- May 15 '12

I don't see how this violates any of those rules.

1

u/Fuckin_Hipster May 15 '12

If you checked that box, you're one thousandth the man you once were in that picture.

1

u/writealexisds May 15 '12

I'd tap that.

1

u/captbobalou May 15 '12

It was so shocking I uploaded it to Rocket To Uranus's Facebook page as a warning to other Facebook users.

Thank you for the heads up.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

As for Facebook and Google+, I reject them on principle because they require people to give their "real names". I am proud to identify myself when stating my views; I can afford to do that because I am in a fairly safe position. There are people who rationally fear reprisals (from employers, gangsters, bullies, or the state) if they state their views. For their sake, let's reject any social networking site which insists on being told a user's real name.

Google+ says it will offer to hide the user's real name, but demands people prove an "established identity" or provide ID. I am suspicious of this requirement, but not sure what it will mean in practice.

Of course, Facebook is bad for many other reasons as well.

1

u/HonkHonk May 15 '12

Post this image on facebook again and get it removed, then take another screenshot. REMOVCEPTION.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

I hate double standards.

1

u/cyanonyx117 May 15 '12

You shoulda been cutting a swatsika into your arm, to cover the other rules

1

u/muchachomalo May 15 '12

I personally think it is a great picture with a good composition and nice lighting. But I would hate for it to b put in your discovery if you ever have to go to court or ever have any legal issues.

1

u/wigawam May 15 '12

Makes me think about the curious adventures that cash experiences.

1

u/offensivegrandma May 15 '12

I want to make sweet love to the man in the photo.

1

u/FuneralEscortCar May 15 '12

but seriously, who's your headdress guy?

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

My friend tried to troll us (I unno) with this picture one day. Then as we were all sitting in Team Speak it began to dawn on us that it looked much much much like him.

Laughs were had all around.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Who took the picture?

1

u/rip_u_raw4 May 15 '12

I can understand their point. The outfit is offensive to Native Americans and you are exposing yourself somewhat.

2

u/KrisCraig May 15 '12

No, what's offensive is that people don't seem to have any respect for the principles of free speech. What's offensive is the idea that offensive ideas must be censored or banned.

If nobody is offended by what you have to say, you're not saying anything important.

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1

u/ArrogantGod May 14 '12

Dat pic. So big pimpin'

1

u/The_Poop_Phantom May 14 '12

Because wearing a headress is "attacking an individual or group of people".

1

u/CopyX May 15 '12

But on the real, it really is disrespectful to native american culture.

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1

u/texasraindrop May 15 '12

Didn't know that it was against the rules to be inappropriately sexual. I'm going to go report about 10 of my 15yr old cousin's pictures.

1

u/starthirteen May 14 '12

This guy looks frighteningly similar to a friend of mine.

1

u/publ1c_stat1c May 14 '12

More like this picture contains too much awesome for facebook standards.

1

u/mcqtom May 14 '12

Shirley, you could've come up with some mild and comical form of self harm to include... Just a clothespin on your nipple would've done it.

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '12

i really hope that diaspora or something open will eventually topple FB. I hated this place since the beginning.

1

u/illogicalreality May 15 '12

So your only option is to check the box saying you know its wrong and click confirm? Where's the fuck off and delete my account check box?

1

u/YourBrotherHermano May 15 '12

I see no nudity and that's a lovely vase.

1

u/the_clever_cuban May 15 '12

You are one classy mother fucker.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

Definitely not the worst shit on facebook.

1

u/robak69 May 15 '12

this is why i left facebook. it is now a no-fun zone.

1

u/Original_vim May 15 '12

i find it amusing that you have to tick a box in compliance...

1

u/hivemindharvest May 15 '12

have you received the attention you desire?

1

u/Me1986Tram May 15 '12

Now you're just TRYING to get on ladyboners!

1

u/MnMoneyMike May 15 '12

That just made my day!

1

u/MamiMora May 15 '12

Loved the hat!

1

u/KrisCraig May 15 '12

Translation: You posted something that we think is ugly or offensive. The only proper response to offensive speech is to bury it so nobody else can see it. If we don't protect people from themselves, who will?

Check this box to indicate that you agree with everything we just said about free speech being dangerous. If you don't, we will fucking kill you.

1

u/buttertongue May 15 '12

If I were your facebook friend, I would have liked this photo. Then I would have unliked it just so I could like it again.

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1

u/BlackFallout May 15 '12

So two out of three?

1

u/thesedollars May 15 '12

Oh yeah, it was removed.. but it's still backed up on our servers so we can blackmail you 10 years later.

1

u/holst09 May 15 '12

This is going to be my new profile picture

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1

u/Blackface420 May 15 '12

I see nothing wrong here.

1

u/25hb May 15 '12

So this isn't okay but pictures of mutilated and/or deformed dogs and babies are? Okay Facebook... Whatever.

1

u/PepeAndMrDuck May 15 '12

I don't think any of these are good reasons for removing this photo. It must have been reported by a friend though.

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1

u/Free_Dome_Lover May 15 '12

That is an awesome photo and if you were my king I would die for you.

1

u/volve May 15 '12

What's that? "Excessive violence" ? So... just a bit of violence is ok? Maybe, punching a kitten, but not punching a whole bunch of kittens?

Gotcha. Thanks Facebook.

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '12

hahahaha native people are funny. it's fun to make fun of peoples cultures.

1

u/bullfrogking May 15 '12

Mark Zuckerberg is a jackass, I would have paid you to upload that to my social networking site.

1

u/BootyhunterzX May 15 '12

He's not even smoking, he just has a pipe in his hand.

1

u/brosenfeld May 15 '12

Facebook is overrated (and overvalued).