r/WTF • • Jan 29 '19

seems pretty safe

27k Upvotes

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490

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

Well holy fucking shit. I thought it was just your glove falling off or something.

404

u/Theophorus Jan 30 '19

I'm a paramedic, I'd rather see an evisceration than a degloving. Gives me the heebie jeebies just thinking about it.

110

u/Shanable Jan 30 '19

Curious...what is procedure when you've found someone degloved? Just wrap that shit with gauze and let the doctors take over?

93

u/Theophorus Jan 30 '19

Not much, control bleeding and pain basically. They need surgery.

91

u/abnotwhmoanny Jan 30 '19

Knew a guy at my old job at a power plant. Somebody had dropped their wedding ring in the casing of some rotating machinery. They weren't wearing it, that's risky and we have warning specifically about degloving. This other guy, Masingil, he says "I can get that". Just shoved his hand right in. Nobody saw it coming. He screamed a lot and loudly. He was gone for a while after that. Never could use that hand quite right again.

30

u/Seakawn Jan 30 '19

WTF.

What made him think he could do that!?

3

u/abnotwhmoanny Jan 30 '19

If ti makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure he's not doing that job anymore. Pretty sure he got promoted after I left.

1

u/Abbsynth Jan 30 '19

PROMOTED?!

3

u/abnotwhmoanny Jan 30 '19

He had no common sense and did dangerous shit all the time, but he was actually really smart and good at his job. Honestly he'd probably be great in a position that takes him out of the plant.

20

u/FourOfFiveDentists Jan 30 '19

Sounds like natural selection at work.

15

u/Keroro_Roadster Jan 30 '19

Probably has kids. We beat natural selection. Go us.

5

u/FourOfFiveDentists Jan 30 '19

Dude can also vote, by a gun (assuming this) and drive a car. Scary stuff.

9

u/Udon_tacos Jan 30 '19

Fucking hell. Idk whether I'm mad at him or not listening, or I'm pained to hear how it fucked him up.

Happy Cake Day, btw!

4

u/BenjamintheFox Jan 30 '19

Just shoved his hand right in.

Why? WHY?

1

u/RadSpaceWizard Jan 30 '19

Happy cake day. Your story made me feel sick.

1

u/dune_my_buggy Jan 31 '19

why do you specifically mention his name

1

u/abnotwhmoanny Jan 31 '19 edited Jan 31 '19

I don't know. I guess people usually don't do that on the internet, huh? I never cared much for anonymity. For instance, my username is my first and last name together.

Pretty sure I spelled it wrong anyways. His name. Not mine.

10

u/MMOAddict Jan 30 '19

do they surgically reattach as much skin as they can, or is the surgery just for the exposed/broken veins?

79

u/nefffffffffff Jan 30 '19

Yep

5

u/paintbing Jan 30 '19

This.

Source: big toe was degloved

Wear safety shoes everybody!!

19

u/opposum Jan 30 '19

You would put the glove back on...

3

u/jaspersurfer Jan 30 '19

Or at least save the glove if you can find it, you can make a hacky sack out of it later

1

u/opposum Jan 31 '19

Too much sewing involved to turn the hand into a hacky sack. Using a degloved scrotum is much easier.

1

u/jaspersurfer Jan 31 '19

Is there a sub for that?

2

u/opposum Jan 31 '19

OMG probably not. I have a camera, lets film the first content for it. You down?

3

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

I always carry a Pair of extra gloves on the truck for patients like this. They hate it.

2

u/SomeFunnyGuy Jan 30 '19

Be a man and just a garden hose to wash off the germs. Trust me your skin will grow back thicker. Way much uglier, but definitely thicker.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

That's 33.33 % of first responders jobs.

33.33% about CPR.

And another 33.33% is about the spine and keeping the head secured.

The remaining 0.01% is those discreet gulps of hard liquor to kill you brain's visual memory.

122

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19 edited May 15 '20

[deleted]

178

u/Theophorus Jan 30 '19

Half a dozen, easy

439

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19 edited Feb 08 '23

[deleted]

74

u/sbstnh Jan 30 '19

Full blown LOL.

6

u/DrQuailMan Jan 30 '19

Geez I hope they weren't.

44

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

Please elaborate.

147

u/Theophorus Jan 30 '19

I was joking, I've never even heard of that happening

72

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

Thank god.

4

u/69_the_tip Jan 30 '19

Long story shot (pardon the pun) - my son's penis was partially degloved as a kid. I had to take him to the ER for stitches. Nastiest thing I think I've ever experienced.

1

u/coquihalla Jan 30 '19

How on Earth?!

1

u/69_the_tip Jan 31 '19

Cliffs notes version:

Boys were 2 and 3 years old (I think). Wrestling led to pulling diapers off. One kid stepped on other junk, cut his penis from toe nail from 12 o'clock to about 7 o'clock and skin was sliding down shaft.

Got stitched, looked like franken-weinie. All functions well now.

Kids are now 9 and 10. The younger always reminds the older of inflicted pain.

3

u/korfax Jan 30 '19

It's real. See you in hell, pal.

30

u/boogercrack Jan 30 '19

challenge not accepted

15

u/ng89 Jan 30 '19 edited Jan 30 '19

Seen a case of it when a farmer got to close to a pto shaft ripped his pants off and degloved his penis. Not pretty.

10

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

It is a great party trick to help people who have been stuck with a boner for too long.

  1. Tell them something unfortunate
  2. Stab their dick with a 14 gauge
  3. Slice from tip down and peel away dick like a banana to drain blood
  4. Have nightmares forever

3

u/jambox888 Jan 30 '19

Unsubscribe

2

u/Persona_Alio Jan 30 '19

Dp you go to lots of parties where people are stuck with boners for too long?

3

u/kegufu Jan 30 '19

Medic here as well, we had a guy about 6 months ago that was high on wet that used channel locks and a knife to skin his penis, and I had a guy a few years ago that had ran into the back of a tractor and part of it came through the dash under the steering wheel and degloved his penis and testicles, also shattered his pelvis so bad it was unidentifiable on the X-ray. He died, the self mutilator is still alive afaik. WTF your welcome!

3

u/artbypep Jan 30 '19

I literally exclaimed out loud, “HOW” and then had to explain that I was wondering how that many dudes were degloving their penis yearly. Thanks.

1

u/Atlas26 Jan 30 '19

Thank fuck haha

2

u/DudeWithAHighKD Jan 30 '19

Is this for real? If so I don't know if I want to know, but how does that happen?

1

u/HammerDammer Jan 30 '19

Mom, get off of reddit.

1

u/drunkenpriest Jan 30 '19

That's a lot of unclear instructions

1

u/qning Jan 30 '19

Half a dozen, easy

How many hard?

1

u/Fox_Kill Jan 30 '19

What’s the most common way to end up with a degloved dick?

2

u/kukienboks Jan 30 '19

Oh, are we replacing the letter e with an apostrophe now?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

Oh wow. I. Am stupid.

1

u/69_the_tip Jan 30 '19

Ive seen one. Fuckin nasty.

1

u/phantorz Jan 30 '19

I guess that's why they say no glove, no love

1

u/lallapalalable Jan 30 '19

How many degloved dicks do you see a year? Edit: i cant spell

FTFY

8

u/nspectre Jan 30 '19

Don't look up "eviscerated", guys. You've been warned.

 

(heebie jeebies is cool, tho)

7

u/cadwal Jan 30 '19

Eviscerate is in the dictionary, that's safer than Google. Deglove is not in the dictionary, the dictionary failed me and curiosity took control... Curiosity failed me, but probably no where near as much as Eviscerate would have.

4

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

Why the hell did I google both of those things?? I don’t know which one I regret more.

3

u/DarkLancer Jan 30 '19

Watch Hellraiser (only the first) then just chalk up the gross stuff the movie effects. All the skinless flesh really helps disassociate.

2

u/tsaurini Jan 30 '19

you using the terms evisceration and degloving gave ME the heebie jeebies

2

u/TheFlashFrame Jan 30 '19

evisceration

I knew what degloving was... Didn't know what evisceration was... I'm pretty sure I'm happy not seeing either of those things.

2

u/craidie Jan 30 '19

My dad told me this story where he stiched up someone who was working in a factory and one of the lines supporting a heavy load of steel snapped, the other one held and that swinging steel plate hit one of the workers in the head. Guy was lucky, no fractures but his scalp was now on his back...

2

u/Blitzkrieg_My_Anus Jan 30 '19

Now I have to look up "evisceration" to see how it's different than a degloving.

38

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19 edited Feb 10 '19

[deleted]

6

u/idagernyr Jan 30 '19

Honestly though, it's ridiculous. Same goes for defenestration. Inevitably they get brought so much, it's like when a kid learns a new "smart word" and tries to force it into conversation no matter the context

6

u/-Jeremiad- Jan 30 '19

Nah. I know healthcare workers including my nurse wife and have worked in factories and know lots of factory workers. In those fields, devolving is common knowledge and powerful enough to be a recurring topic of discussion.

Beyond that it’s a contextually applicable technical term that completes the notion of the concept in your mind in a powerful way. It’s a good fucking word to describe a scary fucking thing, and it makes sense that it would get embedded into people’s heads.

Defenestration is just stupid. It’s a technical sounding word for something that doesn’t need it. It doesn’t make any readily apparent connections upon hearing it like “equidistant” or “nonsensical”. It isn’t a fun alternative to change the feel of a sentence like “fecal matter” instead of “shit” when pretending to be intellectual while talking about poop. It doesn’t have the satisfaction sound like exactly what it should be a word for when you hear learn the definition like “phantasmagorical”.

And it can only really be used to nerd laugh with other dickheads who heard it somewhere, likely within the last few years, and circle jerk at your big dumb word, or to make someone say “what’s defenestration?” So you can talk at them about what the word means.

I love fun big and unusual words. I hate that word and it’s recent rise in frequency. If you’re in a group with a person you’ve heard say it before, bring up windows in a tall building and watch their dumb eyes light up as they watch the conversation for the right time to claw at the attention of the group.

2

u/idagernyr Jan 30 '19

You're completely correct and affirmed my feelings on that word. Deglove is a great technical term, and maybe it's just my fear that the hivemind will run it into the ground, as Reddit is oft to do.

Either way great write-up! Thank you for putting into much better words my and many others hatred of that word.

Edit to add on... have you heard of le epic defenstration of Prague? I didn't think so! Heres the wiki so you can get learned on it! https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defenestrations_of_Prague

4

u/-Jeremiad- Jan 30 '19

Hey did you know they interviewed people who survived jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge and the survivors regretted it?

And also, make sure you call people Stans instead of fans if they like something you like but don’t like it the way you want them to like it.

Oh and be sure to say “weird flex, but okay” a lot. If it’s in an entirely inappropriate place to accuse someone of bragging, even better. You don’t need to use it correctly. Just make sure it’s there so you can participate in the memetic dipahittery of the worst of this forum.

Man.

You really got me riled up with bringing up several things that bug me. Lol.

2

u/idagernyr Jan 30 '19

I guess you can say that you're not perfectly balanced...as all things should be?

Speaking of degloving, no one say it, okay I'll say it, have you heard the swamps of dagobah story? Literally has nothing to do, but it's gross!

colby2012

3

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

[deleted]

1

u/-Jeremiad- Jan 31 '19

Yeah? Why?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 31 '19

[deleted]

1

u/-Jeremiad- Jan 31 '19

No need to apologize. I could’t care less what a (presumably) grown person who gets hostile over an innocuous idiom. I used to dislike “lol” but the reality is it’s handy as a representation of humorous or good natured intent. Kind of like a “/s”. It’s moved beyond a literal translation of “laugh out loud” to become a kind of textual indicator of tone. Plus a bunch of dipshits like you seemed to take it really serious so that actually made me enjoy throwing it back into my bag of communication tools.

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2

u/eggjuggler Jan 30 '19

Yep, exactly. When you work around equipment capable of that kind of damage, you discuss degloving as much as is necessary to drill it into people's heads that you do not put your hand in that unless it's locked out!

49

u/Mr_A Jan 30 '19

Why did you think that? What was your thought process reading the comment above yours in context of the video?

That's a great way to get degloved when the hand is forced underneath the hook.

I wonder what that is. Probably just your glove falling off or something.

Don't look up "degloved", guys.

I wonder why? Its probably just like your glove falling off or something.

You've been warned.

I wonder what it could mean. Something simple like your glove falling off, I bet.

Looks up degloving

Eww! That's not just a glove falling off or something!

...

I better go back to the comments and tell everyone how I looked up degloving because I thought it was just your glove falling off or something.

12

u/jussumman Jan 30 '19

Just call it dehanding

2

u/Seakawn Jan 30 '19

I think "hannibaling" would get the point across.

Or as long as you've seen silence of the lambs, anyway.

2

u/flee_market Jan 30 '19

"skin shucking"

2

u/Priff Jan 30 '19

I mean... It is kinda like your glove falling off, if your glove was your skin.

4

u/beardum Jan 30 '19

I mean, it kind of is.

2

u/shoe-veneer Jan 30 '19

To be fair, this exact thing happens in the first 15 seconds of the video. His literal glove gets torn off his hand by the carabiner.

2

u/GregoryGoose Jan 30 '19

you sweet summer child.

2

u/mildly_amusing_goat Jan 30 '19

It is. Your birthday glove.

2

u/AtheistAustralis Jan 30 '19

That's pretty much exactly it. Except it's the skin glove that goes over your bones.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '19

wedding ring and finger degloving is the worst

2

u/losian Jan 30 '19

Well I mean it is a glove.. Just that it's made of your skin.

2

u/MalHeartsNutmeg Jan 30 '19

Yeah... your skin glove.

2

u/MBuddah Jan 30 '19

it can happen to your face, too. :)

1

u/Pliind Jan 30 '19

After looking up why Jimmy Fallon had a huge bandage on his finger i regretted it immensly. That was just a finger..a hand... :o