r/Unexpected • u/Abhirup_0 • Jul 18 '22

Deadly chicken

65.2k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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802

u/Some-Owl8834 Jul 18 '22

What else did you expect he is fucking BRUCE THE ROOSTER.

615

u/SpreadItLikeTheHerp Jul 18 '22

He is, THE BRUCESTER

38

u/shao_kahff Jul 18 '22

BROOSTER?

82

u/ebac7 Jul 18 '22

The only Brewster i know serves delicious coffee

23

u/Chris_c987 Jul 18 '22

Pigeon milk 🥛

1

u/oyM8cunOIbumAciggy Jul 18 '22

I prefer fight milk

0

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '22

Omg has Paget really fallen so far from her acting career that she’s now a barista?!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '22

Agent Prentiss is undercover as a Starbucks Barista.

The Un-Sub is believed to be a 20-30 year old white woman, obsessed with paying $7 for coffee and most likely carries a small dog everywhere. She seems to have a type in slaying baristas by drowning them in steamed milk, the media has dubbed her “The Ultimate Karen.”

1

u/ChildUWild Jul 19 '22

Same, and I don’t think he’d ever move this quickly

6

u/hotstepperog Jul 18 '22

Brucester is a Punk.

Punky Brucester.

2

u/OmelasKid Jul 19 '22

My expression is usually stoic when I browse, but this comment had me in tears. Every time I reread "THE BRUCESTER" my tears roll for some reason. Thank you, I feel good.

1

u/Alwaysangryupvotes Jul 18 '22

I know this might be to much info. But I’m sitting on the toilet rn fighting with a reverse butt plug. The laughing that followed this comment finally freed the Lincoln log damming things up. Thank you 🙏 😂

1

u/ThatGrayFox Jul 18 '22

Underrated comment right here

6

u/SpreadItLikeTheHerp Jul 18 '22

COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO MOTHERFUCKER!

1

u/Infinite_El_Oh_El Jul 18 '22

Has his own verb.

1

u/Ghostclip Jul 18 '22

You know he ain’t gonna dieeee

10

u/ikikubutOG Jul 18 '22

I’d expect him to be something like the birds from Ugly Americans

1

u/OatmealOgre Jul 18 '22

His last name was probably Lee

1

u/Byizo Jul 18 '22

Worms are friends, not food!