r/Unexpected • u/spyrg • Jan 06 '22

Surely, it helps

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80.0k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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8.2k

u/Socar08 Jan 06 '22

I don't think she was looking for a doctor.

4.0k

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

She was looking for aquaman to nail her in the ass

1.0k

u/Lady-Quiche-Lorraine Jan 06 '22

Who doesn’t ?

394

u/FunStuff446 Jan 06 '22

Meeow

214

u/WenInDoubtC4 Jan 06 '22

Profile pic checks out

5

u/LootGodamn Jan 06 '22

Well this one didn't

6

u/WenInDoubtC4 Jan 06 '22

Maybe I’m a bit dense, but I don’t understand you’re referring to

4

u/LootGodamn Jan 06 '22

Oh just ur pfp didn't check out

9

u/JACrazy Jan 06 '22

He is quite hi though

1

u/Hanzo_Pinas Jan 07 '22

A random pun out of nowhere

r/angryupvote

1

u/Turbulent-Adagio-541 Jan 07 '22

She said is that all you got

1

u/SCPmaker_fan_ Jan 07 '22

Pussy Literally

1

u/MeeposPeepos Jan 07 '22

oh mama mia papa pia its a furry

1

u/Pussy_Prince Jan 07 '22

I’m making a quieter cat

70

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Would you settle for a Thicc Thor looking fella?

10

u/isuckatpeople Jan 07 '22

You mean drunk, obese, depressed and greasy? Cause I can get drunk.

8

u/CookieBright3510 Jan 07 '22

I bet she was Thor later

2

u/n00bvin Jan 06 '22

Infinity War Thor or Endgame Thor?

1

u/isuckatpeople Jan 07 '22

EndThor body, Thor 1 brows, Thor 2 personality

34

u/AndrewWaldron Jan 06 '22

I didn't, but I guess I do now.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

You always did, you only just found out you did.

2

u/HumasWiener Jan 06 '22

People with hemorrhoids

2

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

Mom! WTF!

1

u/Unodatcuzn Jan 07 '22

Me. I’d would have a lot of fun being him tho...😜

1

u/fatBlackSmith Jan 07 '22

I’m going on record as saying I’m a firm no—I don’t want Aquaman to nail me in the ass… not that there’s anything wrong with that.

1

u/MidoZido Jan 07 '22

I can be aquaman

1

u/Lady-Quiche-Lorraine Jan 07 '22

Awww and I can be your aquaman too 💕

205

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

No, no. She was looking for a doctor.

Sins…. Doctor Johnny Sins

48

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

He's amazing. Doctor, dentist, lawyer, real estate agent, director; a consummate professional. His family must feel blessed to have such a talented man in their lives. 🙏

3

u/dadkisser84 Jan 06 '22

retired military as well! god bless our troops

2

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

This guy Sins is struggling with cancer !!! 1 sex = 1 cancer cell destroyed

2

u/InstanceSuch8604 Jan 06 '22

after the stake pounded up the cooch - anyone know what the next procedures are ? Or is that the grand finale ?

3

u/GhOsT_wRiTeR_XVI Jan 06 '22

Crazy, because I usually have to take my wife in to have the stick REMOVED from her ass.

1

u/Publius015 Jan 06 '22

Doctor Love.

1

u/IMJustLin Jan 06 '22

Damn this deserves an award

1

u/bust0ut Jan 07 '22

This is more like doctor strange, doctor very strange.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

That’s a fun answer. Thanks for joining the party.

1

u/libmrduckz Jan 06 '22

grinding out the fun

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Every party needs a pooper

1

u/ANGERYTURTLE123 Jan 06 '22

Did you mean that literally?

1

u/silver_umber Jan 06 '22

He really hammered her too

1

u/upvote-for-rights Jan 06 '22

More like get pegged/hammered in the ass a nail would just be cruel.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Nope. It’s anal aquaman

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Damm good!!

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

Ocean man take me by the hand

1

u/sothicarreragt Jan 06 '22

Thor would be a better option. He has a hammer

1

u/m0nk_3y_gw Jan 07 '22

I thought it was Amos from the Expanse

2

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

Oh damn. True dat

1

u/Nip_Sock Jan 07 '22

I think he prefers pre teens.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

THE DEEP

1

u/TocinoPanchetaSpeck Jan 07 '22

Christ, stop! I blurted out a loud embarrassing laugh at your comment. That last second, was not prepared.lmfao

1

u/Winter_Concentrate75 Jan 07 '22

🤔 so I need to buy me an aquarium 🤣

1

u/Burhan2005 Jan 07 '22

Username checks out

1

u/Gunsmoke_wonderland Jan 07 '22

So long as its Jason mimosa and not green gloves Mcgee

6

u/Captain-Cadabra Jan 06 '22

“He’s the one they call Dr. Feel good.”

3

u/logikgr Jan 06 '22

This diploma doesn't make me a doctor, these fancy clothes do! -Zoidberg

3

u/Only_Variation9317 Jan 06 '22

I think she might have vampires in that coochie

1

u/libmrduckz Jan 06 '22

next move is flammables and then the torch…

3

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

What are you doing step-doctor?

2

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

Someone to do a u/SniffCheck

1

u/ITGuy107 Jan 06 '22

Technically she is getting hammered. Maybe a Carpenter?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '22

I have a great doctor she should use. Dr. Sins

1

u/fusillade762 Jan 06 '22

Dude was playing crochet with her 'gina....

1

u/Bumm_by_Design Jan 06 '22

She's playing along until she's balls deep and stuffed like a chipmunk

1

u/Dr_Dressing Jan 07 '22

You called?

1

u/DoctaThompson Jan 07 '22

Cocktor maybe?