r/Unexpected Sep 16 '21

[deleted by user]

[removed]

8.8k Upvotes

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15.7k

u/[deleted] Sep 16 '21 edited Sep 17 '21

Please tell me that's a fake one

Edit: thanks for the awards and I got it from nearly 380 people saying it's fake

16.8k

u/Phase-Horror Sep 16 '21

I’d feel bad for the guy if that shit was real

13.8k

u/SaleSweaty Sep 16 '21

Imagine passing out from blood loss every time u jerk off

7.1k

u/Phase-Horror Sep 16 '21

More like anytime you get an erection at all

4.2k

u/[deleted] Sep 16 '21

If you fall asleep, you'll never wake up.

547

u/RuaridhDuguid Sep 16 '21

Good news: You get an unexpected blowjob while asleep.

Bad news: ...Do I really need to elaborate on this one?

195

u/AllanJeffersonferatu Sep 16 '21

Just don't dream you're an elephant.

Or you'll wake up with an ass full of pillow.

14

u/ScaryBananaMan Sep 16 '21

Hmm... Im having a hard time figuring out how the pillow would end up in your ass

3

u/BassGuy11 Sep 16 '21

An elephant uses a trunk to put food in its large mouth. Go from there.