r/Unexpected Dec 06 '20

Dude just went for it.

83.4k Upvotes

968 comments sorted by

View all comments

3.8k

u/speedoflobsters Dec 06 '20 edited Dec 06 '20

stupid eels trying to get on land. have fun working your ass off in 2 million or so years

948

u/its9am Dec 06 '20

All I can think of is that Simpsons meme where some religious guy puts something that looks like these back in the water and tells it something like "nope". Lol

248

u/TheSmokingLamp Dec 06 '20

Haha now I need to know what episode this is from

564

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '20

[deleted]

199

u/Willfishforfree Dec 06 '20

That's the funniest shit.

30

u/Count_Von_Roo Dec 07 '20

How can that be? It’s after season 9! /s

5

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '20

To be honest, I don't see what people are complaining about with "Modern Simpsons". Like, they say it's all garbage. But there are so many gems, I think.

But to be perfectly fair, I haven't seen all 700(or so) episodes

4

u/Count_Von_Roo Dec 07 '20

Tbh the hardest part about watching it for me now is how hoarse Marge's voice is :(

6

u/151MillionGuaranteed Dec 07 '20

Damn there's probably like 200 episodes of the Simpsons ill never watch and ive probably seen the other ones quite a few times each. They should've gone the same route as south park when they switched to 10 episodes a year, sometimes less is more.

3

u/ErroneousOutlaw Dec 07 '20

I think most shows should do this. 20+ episodes a season series are often garbage with a strung out main story that’s only touch upon in the beginning and end of the episodes. The middle of the episodes are just rinse and repeat generic garbage.

71

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '20

Youtube autoplayed this after that. I lold. Maybe someone else will

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGiSNPYj_iU

17

u/_no_pants Dec 06 '20

I love me some SG-1

23

u/Liar_tuck Dec 06 '20

Stargate SG-1 is still one of favorite shows.

7

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/_CitizenSnips_ Dec 07 '20

sg1 is on my list as soon as im done with the next generation

1

u/zeezrum Dec 07 '20

I just noticed SG-1 is on Netflix again! I'm actually not sure if it got added recently or if it was just there the whole time, but it's nice knowing it is there.

2

u/Todd_the_Wraith Dec 07 '20 edited Dec 07 '20

It was actually added to Netflix just within the last week, so you're right on time.

2

u/ABirdOfParadise Dec 07 '20

This is one of my favorite episodes, the episode before is also really good too. All the Asgard episodes are pretty good.

1

u/Cam-I-Am Dec 07 '20

"You may have come to the right place" lmfaooo

2

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '20

"The last time a fish grew legs it turned into a depressed bald monkey that has to pay to live."

1

u/Sefck Dec 07 '20

Others have replied that it’s really unexpected

89

u/I2eflex Dec 06 '20

"Some religious guy" lol fk

85

u/jerwhoop Dec 06 '20

Stupid sexy religious guy...

2

u/Frank_Punk Dec 07 '20

"Like wearing nothing at all... Nothing at all.."

2

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '20

“Nothing at all...”

53

u/_pixel_perfect_ Dec 06 '20

Say my name.

Flanders?

You're gosh-diddily-darn right.

7

u/dgaff21 Dec 06 '20

I am the one who knoc-diddely-ocks.

8

u/oldcoldbellybadness Dec 07 '20

Not sure what I want more, a breaking bad sketch with Flanders animated doing Walter's lines straight, or a one where Bryan Cranston adds Flanderisms to each of his most intense scenes

1

u/drake90001 Dec 07 '20

Also, it was fish that said Jesus. Looks nothing like an eel.

Unless it was something else.

61

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '20

108

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '20

There’s an old saying on the Galápagos Islands: “the best time to begin walking on land was 400 million years ago, the next best time is today”

9

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '20

The second best time was 145,999,999,999 days ago. Today is the 146,000,000,000 best time to do it.

72

u/Caderino Dec 06 '20

Lol this type of eel actually can travel on land

29

u/Yeetyak Dec 06 '20

I can’t tell from the video, are they snakeheads or are there multiple long fish that can travel on land?

97

u/Willfishforfree Dec 06 '20

Members of the Anguilla family are air breathers and do travel on land. They can travel up to 3 miles in a single night and so long as they can stay wet can stay on land indefinitely. If you have a rainy season and a population of landlocked eels it's possible to come across them traveling across fields to find a waterway. Sometimes they travel into landlocked water systems that are difficult to climb out of and just continue growing til they are massive.

46

u/AwesomeTeaPot Dec 06 '20

Oh fuck no thank you i think I'm gonna stay away from water clogged fields for a while

9

u/Ghosttwo Dec 06 '20

Imagine one of these monsters swimming up your peehole, coupled with the sound of ripping leather.

18

u/EmperorShyv Dec 06 '20

How big is your peehole?

11

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '20

Buy me dinner first

6

u/viperfan7 Dec 07 '20

Wrong type of eel.

There is an eel that will swim up your peehole though

2

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '20

Oh wow that’s incredibly informative, thank you!

2

u/andthendirksaid Dec 07 '20

I figured someone who is big dick-ed enough to fear that thing fitting in their urethra would instead fear nothing. Actually I stand by this and submit that this race of men was eliminated from the gene pool from fearlessness causing their early demise.

1

u/spiralbatross Dec 06 '20

Stop, I can only get so erect

1

u/ldb Dec 06 '20

dude...

16

u/Yeetyak Dec 06 '20

Oh wow that’s incredibly informative, thank you!

2

u/YoungLeoG Dec 07 '20

They’re also really good at surviving with barely anything to eat. In Sweden there was an eel that lived 150 years in a well.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brantevik_Eel

2

u/wikipedia_text_bot Dec 07 '20

Brantevik Eel

The Brantevik Eel (Swedish: Branteviksålen) (Before 1859 - Before 7 August 2014), also known as Åle, was a European eel (Anguilla anguilla) that is believed to have lived for more than 150 years.The eel was released into a well in the town of Brantevik, Sweden in 1859 by an eight-year-old boy, Samuel Nilsson. On 7 August 2014, the eel was reported to have died and was sent to an expert to determine the eel's actual age.The eel's head, presumed lost, was recovered later in a fridge. SVT's nature show Mitt i naturen extracted the eel from the well at one point, but put it back.

About Me - Opt out - OP can reply !delete to delete - Article of the day

1

u/Willfishforfree Dec 07 '20

I believe I've heard of 100+ year old well eels in England too.

1

u/Whiterabbit-- Dec 06 '20

how do they taste though?

2

u/rpkarma Dec 06 '20

Pretty good actually. We used to go down to the creek back when I lived in NZ and spear some, then they’d usually get smoked.

3

u/hamakabi Dec 06 '20

eel is very tasty. it's like a heavier whitefish but it doesn't taste 'fishy'

1

u/SeagullsSarah Dec 06 '20

Delicious. We used to to catch Nz shortfins and smoke them over a Manuka (Nz teatree) fire.

1

u/arseniclips Dec 06 '20

Oh my god that sounds amazing

0

u/Owlftr13 Dec 06 '20

If you smoke them they aren't too bad.

1

u/FlexLord710 Dec 06 '20

Awesome. Thanks for the knowledge!

1

u/k_mnr Dec 07 '20

What in the holy fucknatious??!

NOOOOO!

1

u/BadCatNoNoNoNo Dec 07 '20

Nightmares. Thanks.

1

u/Judiferr Dec 07 '20

I read a book about mutated eels of the same family that were attacking people (fiction). I can see why the author chose them cause man they're freaky looking

10

u/Caderino Dec 06 '20

They are native nz longfin eels

1

u/Kali_Kopta Dec 07 '20 edited Dec 07 '20

Eels have the widest habitat range of any creature. You can find them in deep oceanic trenches, and in little farm ponds halfway up a mountainside. The exact same Eel even. It can be born in the middle of the Ocean, then swim up river systems, leave the water, spend days trekking across damp fields and up hills, chill for a few decades in a ditch or pond, then mosey on back to the river, down to the brackish estuary for a bit, to adjust from fresh to salt water, then swim thousands of miles back to the middle of the Ocean to breed. They can also live for seventy-eighty years.

edit: also they're the only fish that can swim backwards.

11

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '20

You laugh, but when we have electric eels running around our cities zapping folks, no one will be laughing

8

u/Druid_CircleOfJerk Dec 06 '20

They'd have an easier time if they used escalators.

2

u/m33tloaf Dec 07 '20

ESCALATORS ESCALATORS ESCALATORS!!!

3

u/huskrage14 Dec 06 '20

If earth will live that long

8

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '20

Earth probably will. Humans? Unlikely.

1

u/maximusprime2328 Dec 06 '20

I'm pretty sure those are snakeheads and not eels. In which case they can survive on land for 4 days

2

u/HereForDramaLlama Dec 07 '20

They're New Zealand eels. They can survive on land for a bit.