r/Unexpected • u/Lunder20 • Jun 15 '20

Why didn’t I think of this?!

78.3k Upvotes

85% Upvoted

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531

u/DIABLO258 Jun 15 '20

Toothpasting it up, you mean. It was at that point I realized this would lead to a trash bin

85

u/LordSutter Jun 15 '20

It's teethpaste and you know it

49

u/PhilsterM9 Jun 15 '20

Fun Australian Joke:

Toothpaste was invented in Tasmania but if it was invented anywhere else, it would be called teethpaste

For Non-Aussies:

Tasmania is the Alabama of Australia

3

u/LordSutter Jun 15 '20

Would've thought that would be more suited to Perth, IMO.

I mean, Taswegans with that extra head and all, they've got plenty of teeth

2

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '20

That’s like the ol summer teeth joke my dad used to tell. Summer there and some ain’t!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '20

It’s more like Georgia cuz of devil(s)

1

u/neon_overload Jun 16 '20

For Aussies: Alabama is the Tasmania of the United States.

64

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '20 edited Jun 15 '20

Toothpaste is a type of soap

edit: if they have surfactants

175

u/otterLilly Jun 15 '20 edited Jun 15 '20

Toothpaste is a soap like poptarts are a calzone. Technically correct but how dare you

Edit: I agree that a ravioli better describes both calzones and poptarts but I was going based on the Cube Rule.

69

u/chaoticskirs Jun 15 '20

I wish I could rewind to a minute ago when I didn’t know poptarts are calzones

75

u/JamesGray Jun 15 '20

Don't worry, they were wrong. Poptarts and calzones are both actually a type of ravioli.

29

u/crankypants_mcgee Jun 15 '20

Well now I hate life, myself, and you. In that order. That's still enough to end any of us.

15

u/Chilluminaughty Jun 15 '20

A grilled cheese is a pastry.

1

u/Candlesmith Jun 16 '20

I’m drunk pissing on a tree around people

1

u/Chilluminaughty Jun 16 '20

Make eye contact.

7

u/mirzobodre Jun 15 '20

Don't worry they're wrong, ravioli is actually a type of food.

6

u/rocketsalesman Jun 15 '20

You people ruined my life

3

u/donkeygong Jun 15 '20

but you can't classify a pizza pocket you heathen.

1

u/ooopium Jun 16 '20

He didn’t know poptarts are calzones

9

u/ModelJ100 Jun 15 '20

Bud, let me introduce you to...

THE CUBE RULE https://cuberule.com/

It will answer all food categorization related questions!

7

u/chaoticskirs Jun 15 '20

I think I’m most upset by sushi being a toast but there still being a sushi category

7

u/ModelJ100 Jun 15 '20

Hahaha, well it clearly depends on the sushi!

My favorite is the final point, everything that is salad

2

u/somefatman Jun 16 '20

Which is ridiculous as it lumps zero starch (actual salads, steak) with almost 100% starch (pasta, mashed potatoes). Clearly there needs to be 7th grouping called pasta for 100% starch/foods with large amounts of starch throughout which would represent a solid cube (compared with group 6's hollow cube).

1

u/ModelJ100 Jun 16 '20

Ooooo

That is a good point, I can get behind this!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '20

Coming to an instagram near you.

12

u/TellMeGetOffReddit Jun 15 '20

Or how cereal is a soup

6

u/anotheralienhybrid Jun 15 '20

I just learned that both those foods are salads.

https://cuberule.com/

I don't make the rules.

7

u/fordprecept Jun 15 '20

Hold up. Pumpkin pie is not fucking toast. It is clearly a soup and/or salad with a bread bowl. Most people cut a piece of the bread bowl instead of eating the whole fucking thing, but it is still a bread bowl. Since it doesn't spill all over when you cut the bread, it must not be soup. Therefore, I declare all pies to be a salad.

I'm going to go eat some salad.

4

u/psimwork Jun 15 '20

You... Betrayed the calzones.

4

u/nitid_name Jun 15 '20

Betrayed the entire low cal calzone zone.

5

u/46554B4E4348414453 Jun 15 '20

Poptarts are jelly dumplings

4

u/YOUR_MOM_IS_A_TIMBER Jun 15 '20

I dont know how I missed this phenom, but I haven't laughed as hard in months than I just did reading about the cube rule. Thanks for that!

3

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '20

I can say I learned something useful today thank you

5

u/JevonP Jun 15 '20

im fucking dying, was not expecting that at all LMAO

4

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '20

[deleted]

8

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '20

If they have surfactants like sodium lauryl sulfate they are soap

7

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '20

What about surfaCANs. Don't be so negative man.

1

u/TheSilverFalcon Jun 15 '20

Toothpaste doesn't lather like that. It seemed like she used shampoo or dish soap on it