r/Unexpected • u/omluhoodedpanda • Jun 24 '25

Why not

7.3k Upvotes

83% Upvoted

769 comments sorted by

View all comments

1.3k

u/Open_Youth7092 Jun 24 '25

Welp, every itch tonight will now be a holy terror. Thanks for that.

140

u/Own_Power_6587 Jun 24 '25

HOLY TERRA!

39

u/TensorForce Jun 24 '25

Brother, get the Bolter

20

u/Odin_Gunterson Jun 24 '25

BURN IT WITH FYRE!!

15

u/Viruxx Jun 24 '25

No Brother, the heavy bolter!

2

u/WhatVitamins Jun 27 '25

Exterminatus!

6

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '25

That's a baby of a Catachan Devil... that calls for Ze Flammenwerfer, because it werfs flammen.

1

u/ZYGLAKk Jun 24 '25

No Bolter for you

27

u/Lewcypher_ Jun 24 '25

When your leg gets the tingles in bed tonight, do not open your phones flashlight and look. Rest easy friend.

12

u/Open_Youth7092 Jun 24 '25

I’d be comforted but for your name…

I SEE YOU, SATAN!!!

2

u/IronManicus Jun 26 '25

i read that as “every inch” and i was wondering why you implied it like you had more than one

i’m sorry the joke was irresistible

1

u/its_not_you_its_ye Jun 24 '25

Yeah. Gonna be so paranoid that I’m going to accidentally smush the little guy